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(Independent)   And you thought Britain turning their youth into pants-wetting ninnies was just a figure of speech   (independent.co.uk ) divider line
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6953 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Apr 2014 at 1:04 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-28 01:06:00 PM  
www.blogcdn.com
 
2014-04-28 01:06:36 PM  
And, I suspect, some of my coworkers.
 
2014-04-28 01:09:18 PM  
FTFA: "The figure was five per cent for classroom teachers."

That's a lot of teachers in diapers. I suspect it has little to do with bladder control, if you know what I mean. WINK WINK
 
2014-04-28 01:09:56 PM  
The anthem "Rule, Britannia" was once true, then aspirational, then nostalgic and now it's just sad.  Take a good look, America. This is you in a decade or so.
 
2014-04-28 01:10:26 PM  
THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!
 
2014-04-28 01:11:03 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!


Now with 1500% of your daily dose of derp
 
2014-04-28 01:12:01 PM  

gshepnyc: The anthem "Rule, Britannia" was once true, then aspirational, then nostalgic and now it's just sad.  Take a good look, America. This is you in a decade or so.


Rule Britannia is out of bounds.
 
2014-04-28 01:17:53 PM  
What? This can't be real. How is this real?
 
2014-04-28 01:20:18 PM  
I thought a lot of things!

Apparently I'm wrong.
 
2014-04-28 01:21:15 PM  
You mean people have teachers who force you to wear diapers for FREE!?!?

Man, I missed the farking memo.
 
2014-04-28 01:21:45 PM  
"nappies??????"
wow...just wow.
Sure is strange across the pond.
 
2014-04-28 01:22:21 PM  
Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you THE FUTURE!

img.fark.net
 
2014-04-28 01:22:59 PM  
If you've somehow made it to 15 without this know how, you should still be able to work out the basic mechanics of a toilet.
 
2014-04-28 01:24:26 PM  
I have to pay extra for that..
 
2014-04-28 01:29:28 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!

Now with 1500% of your daily dose of derp


So that must mean you agree.
 
2014-04-28 01:31:50 PM  
I have to wonder if some of those teachers enjoy messing with surveys just as much as their students do..
 
2014-04-28 01:33:57 PM  
Wouldn't really busy parents be more likely to toilet train early, so they don't have to keep changing diapers?
 
2014-04-28 01:36:46 PM  
Bloody hell, what a bunch of lil' jessies. Them wee ones gots a bogroll around their knob and goolies? Was I to wear such garb, I'd be done up like a kipper.
 
2014-04-28 01:43:02 PM  
Guard your manhood.
 
2014-04-28 01:44:37 PM  
How???? Lil Bee HAD to be potty-trained before pre-school (not an issue, but those were the rules we were given) and it was on the school rules when he started kindergarten as well. It wasn't a suggestion but "unless the child is severely developmentally disabled or has a physical issue, they're not starting school." rule.
 
2014-04-28 01:46:40 PM  
We Americans did a bad job teaching them to be independent...


ilol.co
 
2014-04-28 01:49:06 PM  
I'm guessing this is 90% sensationalist bullshiat and 10% special needs children.
 
2014-04-28 01:49:34 PM  
Oh bullshiat. A five year old I can see (although I suspect it's more of a pull-up than an actual diaper with side tabs) but 11? 15? Unless there is a health issue, no. Not possible.

Here, unless you have documentation of  a medical/developmental issue, you do not go to school without toileting independently.
 
2014-04-28 01:52:37 PM  
All joking aside I've known people who have "delayed development" in this way.

1) It's not something you ever want to find out.
2) It's not something you want me to tell you about how I found out, because that's also nasty.
3) They're seriously screwed up by seriously screwed up childhoods; no one just "forgets to learn how to shiat properly."
4) Sometimes they make it into positions of responsibility/power that would surprise you, and that's when the really funny shiat (sorry) funny shiat starts. Nothing funnier than someone yelling and giving orders and tearing their employees down - "incompetent" this, "Don't you know how to do?" that - and then months later you figure out who's been accidentally bioweaponing the bathrooms over and over at work. And you wonder... is it worth getting fired over when you're (once again) getting yelled at in their office for no reason.
 
2014-04-28 02:00:37 PM  

namegoeshere: Oh bullshiat. A five year old I can see (although I suspect it's more of a pull-up than an actual diaper with side tabs) but 11? 15? Unless there is a health issue, no. Not possible.

Here, unless you have documentation of  a medical/developmental issue, you do not go to school without toileting independently.


I just remembered a particularly messed up teen who is going to make me add mental health issues to the list of reasons why an otherwise healthy kid might still be shiatting his pants. I still think TFA is bullshiat, though.
 
2014-04-28 02:02:54 PM  
That is some crazy shiat
 
2014-04-28 02:04:36 PM  
In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.
 
2014-04-28 02:11:56 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: Smeggy Smurf: Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!

Now with 1500% of your daily dose of derp

So that must mean you agree.


Yes I do, you brought enough stupidity for 15 people.  I applaud you for doing the work of so many so that the rest of the wankers have time to chase their own dreams.
 
2014-04-28 02:15:09 PM  

Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.


They knew how to do these things, but some people are just pigs and are too farking lazy to wipe properly.

I agree with others that the FA is BS. In the US, you may not attend a public school if you are not toilet trained. Many day care centers won't take kids still in diapers. I cannot imagine that the UK would be any different, since a five year old who must wear diapers has either developmental, behavioral or psychological issues and would be a major disruption.= in a mainstream classroom.
 
2014-04-28 02:22:45 PM  

JackieRabbit: Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.

They knew how to do these things, but some people are just pigs and are too farking lazy to wipe properly.

I agree with others that the FA is BS. In the US, you may not attend a public school if you are not toilet trained. Many day care centers won't take kids still in diapers. I cannot imagine that the UK would be any different, since a five year old who must wear diapers has either developmental, behavioral or psychological issues and would be a major disruption.= in a mainstream classroom.



POPQUIZ HOTSHOT... WHAT DO YOU DO


img.photobucket.com

http://www.howtowipeyourbutt.com/
 
2014-04-28 02:24:53 PM  
This reporter comes from the  "seems legit" school of journalism and cosmetology.
 
2014-04-28 02:27:16 PM  
Thanks Obama!
 
2014-04-28 02:28:16 PM  

Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.


That or teaching us how to shower and dry off.  I'm in Great Lakes, 1987, in utter disbelief  that we're being taught how to shower and dry off with a towel.
 
2014-04-28 02:29:30 PM  
It would suck having to sit in class next to 15 year old with pants full of shiat.
 
2014-04-28 02:37:58 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!


WE MUST LIBERATE THEM AND SHOW THEM MONARCHS HOW DEMOCRACY WORKS!!!!!1@#!1134111111234213four1!!@#~!~!!!!!
 
2014-04-28 02:39:56 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Serious Post on Serious Thread: Smeggy Smurf: Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!

Now with 1500% of your daily dose of derp

So that must mean you agree.

Yes I do, you brought enough stupidity for 15 people.  I applaud you for doing the work of so many so that the rest of the wankers have time to chase their own dreams.


So you are anti-gun now? Farking fascist.
 
2014-04-28 02:44:20 PM  
I cant imagine having a post-pubescent kid with shiatty pants.
 
2014-04-28 02:48:35 PM  
As somebody getting his degree in secondary ed and already has 500 field hours this does not shock me one bit. Tons of special ed kids are like this, but some of the regular students have issues with daily living that would shock you.
 
2014-04-28 02:52:32 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Serious Post on Serious Thread: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CHILDREN ARE DEPRIVED OF THEIR 2nd AMENDMENT RIGHTS!!!!1!!!1!!!

Now with 1500% of your daily dose of derp


Pretty sure he/she was just kidding.  For your part, Smeggy, you may have understood that... but with your posts it's wisest to never assume anything.  There's a lot of WHOOSH in your world and not just related to humor.
 
2014-04-28 02:53:50 PM  

Gary-L: Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.

That or teaching us how to shower and dry off.  I'm in Great Lakes, 1987, in utter disbelief  that we're being taught how to shower and dry off with a towel.



Great Lakes 2000...

I was just amazed at the 18-20 year olds learning how to do basic hygiene stuff for the 1st time.    A guy two bunks down from mine crapped his pants bad one night and stuffed his undies into someone else's bunk rack forgetting that his name was stenciled in the crappy white n tightys.   Keep in mind all he had to do was take it to the laundry bag and drop them into the hamper.


Other great stories...

Sleepwalkers
Wackin off Night Bandits
Guy who slept with his eyes open and was a very very heavy sleeper. (I had to wake him up for watch and thought he was dead)
 
2014-04-28 03:09:24 PM  

RalphW: What? This can't be real. How is this real?


*shrug*  Because sensationalism and bias rule over good journalism.  Which has always been true, but rarely so much as at present.

Significantly, TFA fails to mention or ask whether there are other factors involved.  For example, mainstreaming has been a growing trend for the last few decades.  As a result, you have a lot more kids going to school who would previously have been considered too "developmentally disabled" and left to vegetate in an attic or asylum somewhere.  With extra resources most of these kids do relatively well and go on to become productive members of society; my guess, ultimately contributing more than the early extra resources cost.

But you will also have an increase in developmental problems in the school, such as kids who aren't yet potty trained. Including, for example, an increase in the percentage of enrolled schoolchildren who can't reliably use a toilet each day.  Which is substantially different than "OMFG our special snowflakes can't even wipe themselves!!!1@1"  Big surprise, the paper is going for what increases newspaper circulation, not what actually informs the public.  In all likelihood, the Independent's newspaper editors are former mainstreamed children who continue to wet themselves on a daily basis.
 
2014-04-28 03:13:54 PM  

maniacbastard: Bloody hell, what a bunch of lil' jessies. Them wee ones gots a bogroll around their knob and goolies? Was I to wear such garb, I'd be done up like a kipper.


Ow! My brain!
 
2014-04-28 03:18:53 PM  

CruJones: Wouldn't really busy parents be more likely to toilet train early, so they don't have to keep changing diapers?


No, because it's "easier" to keep screaming at the kid than take the time to do the training.  Humans are not good at long-term thinking and can be counted on, most of the time, to be reactive instead of proactive.

My SO's parents, for example, would rather keep yelling at their dachshund for trying to hump my dog for the first three days of any time we visit than take their farking horndog to be neutered.  They'd rather keep yelling at the yappy little shiat for barking its head off day and night instead of training it.  They'd rather maintain a stolid and willful ignorance than take it for training when the little f*cker bites me, or my SO, or them, or anyone else it has a mind to.

Not that I'm irritated about this or anything.
 
2014-04-28 03:21:26 PM  

QueenMamaBee: How???? Lil Bee HAD to be potty-trained before pre-school (not an issue, but those were the rules we were given) and it was on the school rules when he started kindergarten as well. It wasn't a suggestion but "unless the child is severely developmentally disabled or has a physical issue, they're not starting school." rule.


This illustrates my previous comment.  For one thing, there are more developmentally disabled kids in school, so of course the percentage of kids with toilet training problems is going to rise.

TFA fails to ask questions that occur to any other average person like you and me, because manufacturing OUTRAGE boosts circulation.
 
2014-04-28 03:40:44 PM  
1. I've been in classrooms with students who wore diapers--in high school, mind--for no other reason than not knowing when they had to go.

2. I was at a special-needs camp as a kid (I'm handicapped myself), and I remember walking into the bathrooms on more than a few occasions to find kids either changing themselves (if for example the only reason they couldn't use a toilet was being in a wheelchair) or staff members changing campers. It's been 15 years and I can still see the soiled diapers...
 
2014-04-28 03:52:54 PM  
Don't forget some just enjoy the feeling of wearing a diaper...
;-)
 
2014-04-28 04:02:25 PM  

FTA:

Nine per cent - almost one in 10 head teachers and senior staff - said that a child aged between five and seven had come to school wearing a nappy in the past year. The figure was five per cent for classroom teachers.


so.. the day to day teachers say 5%.. yet the admin staff say 9%

something isnt adding up
 
2014-04-28 04:47:26 PM  

brimed03: No, because it's "easier" to keep screaming at the kid than take the time to do the training.  

My SO's parents, for example, would rather keep yelling at their dachshund for trying to hump my dog for the first three days of any time we visit than take their farking horndog to be neutered.


Ah, right. No reason to do any training, that might take time. Let's just lop off the testicles.
 
2014-04-28 06:42:34 PM  

Gary-L: Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.

That or teaching us how to shower and dry off.  I'm in Great Lakes, 1987, in utter disbelief  that we're being taught how to shower and dry off with a towel.


One of the many jobs I did when I was in social work was teach personal hygiene. I was shocked at how many people have no farking clue how to clean a human body. I also had no idea of the extent of... odors... that a human body can produce. And just be in the same room with the odor and it will stick to you...

/oh god the memories
//still gagging
///that Seinfeld episode? Dead on. Both hilarious and horrifyingly PTSD* triggering.

*not really, but decades later I can still smell it. Srsly
 
2014-04-28 07:22:58 PM  

Gary-L: Calamityfox: In my U.S. military boot camp days we had a lot of people from the deep south or god knows where who had no clue how to brush their teeth or wipe their butt.   They had instructors come in and teach us how to wipe our as*. I remember thinking "What a waste of time and money" until someone would make a comment or ask a question that pretty much showed everyone how clueless they were when it came to the fine art of poo wiping.

That or teaching us how to shower and dry off.  I'm in Great Lakes, 1987, in utter disbelief  that we're being taught how to shower and dry off with a towel.


I was in Great Lakes in '87 and we had a kid from LA who I was told held it until he shiat himself.  I can't imagine the pain he was in until he let go.  I must be misremembering because it seems like it was 3 weeks into recruit training but that can't be.

Company 426 arrived in December graduated in February of '88
 
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