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(Deadline)   Fox developing show about Jesus's "lost" years, will show him backpacking through Europe, playing guitar on the sidewalk for change, and staying at youth hostels   (deadline.com) divider line 66
    More: Interesting, Lord Jesus, Europe, playing guitar, Fox network, Roma Downey, Pontius Pilate, religious image, Noah  
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844 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 26 Apr 2014 at 8:18 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-26 07:12:37 AM  
Came in hoping for Christopher Moore's "Lamb"

Leaving disappointed
 
2014-04-26 07:27:15 AM  
We have to go back to the island
 
2014-04-26 07:56:22 AM  
Damn hippy
 
2014-04-26 08:06:28 AM  
Stayed in a youth hostel and still didn't get laid? Wow that guy was super lame.
 
2014-04-26 08:14:59 AM  
"described as a coming-of-age story exploring Jesus' early life and formative years as he comes to learn he is the Son of God and is destined for greatness."

It's already been done.
i62.tinypic.com
 
2014-04-26 08:19:08 AM  
His whole life changed when that one time at college, he dropped acid and saw his dad
 
2014-04-26 08:26:42 AM  
Will it show him feverishly trying to invent a claw hammer?
 
2014-04-26 08:27:58 AM  
And don't forget that passionate summer spent with a young Frenchman named Alain...
 
2014-04-26 08:31:46 AM  

SaprolingToken: Came in hoping for Christopher Moore's "Lamb"

Leaving disappointed


Well I came here to suggest they get Moore on board as a writer, I'm not disappointed that someone beat me to it :-)
 
2014-04-26 08:49:57 AM  

MrBallou: "described as a coming-of-age story exploring Jesus' early life and formative years as he comes to learn he is the Son of God and is destined for greatness."

It's already been done.


Just with lamer super powers. I suppose the water into wine thing could come in handy as long as you could control the vintage.

/Le Grande Fromage
 
2014-04-26 08:54:42 AM  
I won't be impressed unless it's in Aramaic with subtitles and everybody in it is actually a Joo, an A-rab or a Roman.
 
2014-04-26 08:54:59 AM  
Until Jesus turned 18, the best Jesus could do was turn water into grape juice.
 
2014-04-26 09:03:31 AM  
So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.
 
2014-04-26 09:05:57 AM  

browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.


You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?
 
2014-04-26 09:11:42 AM  
It's "Jesus'" you ignorant Sub-tard.

It's not a grammar nazi thing, it's a 'god dammit stop being the ignorant equivalent of ebonics'. God damn idiocy is rampent.
 
2014-04-26 09:13:55 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: It's "Jesus'" you ignorant Sub-tard.

It's not a grammar nazi thing, it's a 'god dammit stop being the ignorant equivalent of ebonics'. God damn idiocy is rampent.


"Rampent".

[snert]
 
2014-04-26 09:15:28 AM  
browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

MaudlinMutantMollusk:   You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?


Point taken.
 
2014-04-26 09:15:58 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?


Yes, but that shiat is canon. I think to make it really work the original script has to be successively translated through at least four different languages before hitting the stage.
 
2014-04-26 09:17:39 AM  

deschinc: MaudlinMutantMollusk: browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?

Yes, but that shiat is canon. I think to make it really work the original script has to be successively translated through at least four different languages before hitting the stage.


The Bible has an EU?
 
2014-04-26 09:18:20 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?


My goodness you're so hip and edgy. I hope I'm as cool as you someday.
 
2014-04-26 09:18:25 AM  
Will they deal with the time he got his first boner?
 
2014-04-26 09:22:45 AM  

browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.


Actual Jesus is getting more and more problematic, so pretty much
 
2014-04-26 09:24:11 AM  

markfara: Will they deal with the time he got his first boner?


Tonight on Jesus:The Lost Years... The carpenter's son and his wood. A very special episode.
 
2014-04-26 09:24:57 AM  

Son of Thunder: "Rampent".

[snert]


Whelp, foot in mouth. Time to drink more instead of going to sleep.

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: The Bible has an EU?


I don't think the European Union was formed back when the Roman Empire was still around, though I could be wrong.
 
2014-04-26 09:25:59 AM  

Son of Thunder: MaudlinMutantMollusk: browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

You mean, as opposed to the sh*t they've made up for the past 2000 years?

My goodness you're so hip and edgy. I hope I'm as cool as you someday.


By playing the "you're so hip & edgy" card, you sound like just as much of an idiot as him.

/Fark has become 50% lame call & response bullshiat.
 
2014-04-26 09:29:09 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: I don't think the European Union was formed back when the Roman Empire was still around, though I could be wrong.


The EU is the reformation of the Roman Empire, which heralds the imminent return of Christ.

Well, it was back in '74.
 
2014-04-26 09:31:31 AM  
pics.imcdb.orgpics.imcdb.org

Those are the years Jesus drove for Lamborghini, right?
 
2014-04-26 09:34:42 AM  
Came to make Christopher Moore related references. I see it's been handled.

Cool guy - He responds to emails.
 
2014-04-26 09:35:23 AM  

Lipspinach: /Fark has become 50% lame call & response bullshiat.


NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON

markfara: The EU is the reformation of the Roman Empire, which heralds the imminent return of Christ.

Well, it was back in '74.


I thought that was the Third Reich?
 
2014-04-26 09:38:05 AM  

browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.


That's all you can do about this section of his life.

/because he was an unknown until adulthood
//my guide to fact vs. shiat in the bible is...
///is it original or did another religious tradition do it first?
 
2014-04-26 09:48:57 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: His whole life changed when that one time at college, he dropped acid and saw his dad


While playing Black Sabbath at 78 speed.
 
2014-04-26 09:55:33 AM  

12349876: browneye: So in other words, they're going to make shait up about Jesus.

That's all you can do about this section of his life.

/because he was an unknown until adulthood
//my guide to fact vs. shiat in the bible is...
///is it original or did another religious tradition do it first?


if you count some of the Gnostic texts.. they handled Jesus's childhood. and he apperntly was a notorious prick and a bully.
 
2014-04-26 09:58:54 AM  

SaprolingToken: Came in hoping for Christopher Moore's "Lamb"

Leaving disappointed


Now THAT would be a cable show I would watch weekly as it aired (and not magically acquiring it a day or two later).
 
2014-04-26 10:03:56 AM  
Just stopping by to add my voice to the "Lamb" love. Get on it, FOX!
 
2014-04-26 10:06:57 AM  

Bslim: And don't forget that passionate summer spent with a young Frenchman named Alain...


That explains why Alain Prost was such a good F1 driver.
 
2014-04-26 10:11:02 AM  
This is even more risky for them than Cosmos.  If their Jesus character, and if it the stories are from a time period where little to nothing has been written about him he is indeed a character, if this character does anything other than wish fulfillment for evangelicals, the outrage will be, well, biblical in scale.  Jesus' lost years will have to consist of him flattering wealthy businessmen, chastising beggars, and dispatching youths in hooded robes who approach him on the street.
 
2014-04-26 10:18:08 AM  

Great_Milenko: This is even more risky for them than Cosmos.  If their Jesus character, and if it the stories are from a time period where little to nothing has been written about him he is indeed a character, if this character does anything other than wish fulfillment for evangelicals, the outrage will be, well, biblical in scale.  Jesus' lost years will have to consist of him flattering wealthy businessmen, chastising beggars, and dispatching youths in hooded robes who approach him on the street.


It won't matter much how it's presented, the Evangelicals will b*tch.

/"Lib'rul Hollywood is insulting Christian beliefs!!!!"
//"Send money!!!!!!"
 
2014-04-26 10:32:01 AM  
 
2014-04-26 10:37:40 AM  
There was that night in college when he faced a young Biggus Dickus.
 
2014-04-26 10:39:20 AM  

Cerebral Knievel: if you count some of the Gnostic texts.. they handled Jesus's childhood. and he apperntly was a notorious prick and a bully.


Prick and bully doesn't even begin to describe him. From the Infancy Gospel of Thomas (pdf):

4 Later he was going through the village again when a boy ran and bumped him on the shoulder. Jesus got angry and said to him, "You won't continue your journey." (2)And all of a sudden, he fell down and died.

This is supposed to be an all-knowing, all-powerful, all-loving god?

What the "lost years" movie poster might look like:

upload.wikimedia.org

The judeo-christian god is an evil bastard and he was no better when he was his own son.
 
2014-04-26 10:41:06 AM  

timswar: SaprolingToken: Came in hoping for Christopher Moore's "Lamb"

Leaving disappointed

Well I came here to suggest they get Moore on board as a writer, I'm not disappointed that someone beat me to it :-)


The Gospel of Biff was beyond awesome. I'd watch every week.
 
2014-04-26 10:54:37 AM  
Love me some Christopher Moore, but his recent books have well, kind of sucked.

The problem with making a show with that subject matter is unless you handle it very reverently, the Christian brigade will be so up in arms that the show won't last past the first commercial break.  Sure we can all read Lamb and say it rocked.  (It did.)  But compare how many people read that book to how many people will watch and become outraged.
 
2014-04-26 11:03:36 AM  
According to the bible, Jesus was rejected in his home town of Nazareth and was unable to perform any miracles there because of their "lack of faith". And he never got married. So he was not popular and didn't get his powers until he turned 30.

Somehow I don't think this will be the theme of this mini-series.
 
2014-04-26 11:06:00 AM  

BizarreMan: Love me some Christopher Moore, but his recent books have well, kind of sucked.

The problem with making a show with that subject matter is unless you handle it very reverently, the Christian brigade will be so up in arms that the show won't last past the first commercial break.  Sure we can all read Lamb and say it rocked.  (It did.)  But compare how many people read that book to how many people will watch and become outraged.


And the outrage would make the show even better.

I haven't read Moore's works in order, so I don't know when they were all written, but I've loved every one of his books that I've read.
 
2014-04-26 11:43:46 AM  

stewbert: I haven't read Moore's works in order, so I don't know when they were all written, but I've loved every one of his books that I've read


The two I didn't like were Fool and Sacre Bleu.  I slogged through Fool hoping it would get better.  It didn't.  As far as Sacre Bleu I must confess that I didn't get past the preview chapter on my Kindle.
 
2014-04-26 11:46:38 AM  
Anyone having trouble w/ Noscript and posting images? Did Fark change their XSS tags or something? Or did Noscript tighten it up?
 
2014-04-26 12:03:46 PM  
So sailing to British Isles and doing shrooms w/ druids?
 
2014-04-26 12:12:21 PM  

Trocadero: Anyone having trouble w/ Noscript and posting images? Did Fark change their XSS tags or something? Or did Noscript tighten it up?


There was a redlit thread about it yesterday. I just ran into it myself and disabled No-script it annoyed me so much

/Mike knows about it
//apparently it's the latest version causing the problem
 
2014-04-26 12:18:28 PM  

BizarreMan: stewbert: I haven't read Moore's works in order, so I don't know when they were all written, but I've loved every one of his books that I've read

The two I didn't like were Fool and Sacre Bleu.  I slogged through Fool hoping it would get better.  It didn't.  As far as Sacre Bleu I must confess that I didn't get past the preview chapter on my Kindle.


sacre bleu got better. and if you didnt like Fool, beware that the new one, out this week features the same lead character.

I am a rabid fan of Mr. Moore, and even I gotta say he needs to get back to San Fransico of Big Sur
 
2014-04-26 12:18:40 PM  
 
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