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(Daily Star)   Britain's fearless mutant rat population is mutating, getting more intelligent at being able to not get caught   (dailystar.co.uk) divider line 60
    More: Scary, Britain, Luton  
•       •       •

3866 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Apr 2014 at 9:38 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



60 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-04-23 08:59:46 AM  
Just wait until they get their hands on some warpstone.
 
2014-04-23 09:31:56 AM  
Baltimore rats could give take them.
 
2014-04-23 09:40:53 AM  
All of our counter measures just ensure that we're selecting for the smartest rats to reproduce.
 
2014-04-23 09:41:09 AM  
vostokzapad.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-23 09:41:33 AM  
This is why we need super-huge cats.

2.bp.blogspot.com

Controlled, ideally, by witches.
 
2014-04-23 09:42:52 AM  

Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Controlled, ideally, by witches.


Then the rats will simply make alliances with the mutant turtles.
 
2014-04-23 09:43:34 AM  
Crap....I've read this book, and things do NOT turn out well.

simondewar.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-23 09:43:42 AM  
Those are some Dangerous Beans.
 
2014-04-23 09:45:43 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-04-23 09:45:55 AM  
Rarely has the question been asked: "Is our rats learning?"
 
2014-04-23 09:46:08 AM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Controlled, ideally, by witches.

Then the rats will simply make alliances with the mutant turtles.

img3.wikia.nocookie.net 

Plus, they know ninjitsu...
 
2014-04-23 09:46:09 AM  
I've seen field rats do similar with basic traps - eat all the seed from around the trigger but not the seed under it.  They adapt pretty quickly.  If you put out standard traps and they see their buddy get nailed, they are less likely to come to it next time the trap is set.  They take poison bait but then die in the walls of your house.  The best option is a pellet rifle and night vision.
 
2014-04-23 09:50:08 AM  
animals have to adapt to changes in their environment, and rats have faster adaptation because of their life and breeding cycles.  put them in environments where only the cunning survive, dont be surprised when they become more so.
 
2014-04-23 09:50:50 AM  

Publikwerks: RoyFokker'sGhost: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Controlled, ideally, by witches.

Then the rats will simply make alliances with the mutant turtles.
[img3.wikia.nocookie.net image 300x253]

Plus, they know ninjitsu...


Okay... okay... We have that covered.

In that case we unleash yet bigger cats... The Ligers.

www.blogcdn.com

Typically, they're bred for their skills in magic. They'll need that advantage.
 
GCD
2014-04-23 09:50:52 AM  
They have discovered a way to steal the food out of the devices without setting them off.

Let's see if they're smart enough not to ingest the poisoned food out of the trap. Bet not.
 
2014-04-23 09:50:56 AM  
s3.amazonaws.com
 
2014-04-23 09:51:55 AM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-04-23 09:53:48 AM  
Well, it seems to be about time that rat catchers were brought back! That's what terriers were bred for, after all.
 
2014-04-23 09:56:52 AM  
i.imgur.com

www.blippitt.com
And before long they mutate into:

stefanpoag.files.wordpress.com

2.bp.blogspot.com

3.bp.blogspot.com

i11.photobucket.com

gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net
 
2014-04-23 09:57:57 AM  
That's gonna be a problem.  Your basic rat is pretty freaking smart.
 
2014-04-23 10:05:52 AM  

Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.


I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-04-23 10:09:58 AM  

The One True TheDavid: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 300x150]


Don't be a pussy. Use what your namesake did.

ikerlarraiza.com
 
2014-04-23 10:11:56 AM  

Destructor: Publikwerks: RoyFokker'sGhost: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Controlled, ideally, by witches.

Then the rats will simply make alliances with the mutant turtles.
[img3.wikia.nocookie.net image 300x253]

Plus, they know ninjitsu...

Okay... okay... We have that covered.

In that case we unleash yet bigger cats... The Ligers.

[www.blogcdn.com image 590x393]

Typically, they're bred for their skills in magic. They'll need that advantage.


Liger Liger burning bright...

you ought not to have taken on the mutant rats, then you wouldn't be on fire right now.
 
2014-04-23 10:13:31 AM  

The One True TheDavid: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.


The problem is with Britain itself, and it's irrational (and frankly, baffling) fear of guns. See people? This is what you get when you aren't allowed to protect yourself with firearms: Huge rats. Enjoy your liberty from guns. And say "hi" to the enormous rat gnawing your toe off.
 
2014-04-23 10:27:13 AM  

Weidbrewer: Crap....I've read this book, and things do NOT turn out well.

[simondewar.files.wordpress.com image 510x680]


I read that book as a kid; 11-12...and hadn't seen it since...
My mom died last August and in boxing up her home, doing all that comes with death...
I found that book and a whole bunch others from childhood...she'd kept the damn things for over 30 years.
In tribute to Mom and this thread...I will read this book again this weekend.
RATS!!!
 
2014-04-23 10:27:18 AM  
 
2014-04-23 10:36:45 AM  
I told them they should have investigated the escape from Nimh better.
 
2014-04-23 10:39:04 AM  

Destructor: The One True TheDavid: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

The problem is with Britain itself, and it's irrational (and frankly, baffling) fear of guns. See people? This is what you get when you aren't allowed to protect yourself with firearms: Huge rats. Enjoy your liberty from guns. And say "hi" to the enormous rat gnawing your toe off.



Actually, they use pretty high-end pellet rifles equipped with custom night vision to control rat infestations.  And from experience (and someone who owns several rat-capable firearms), that's the better way.  It is easy to silence a pellet rifle which is one of the key elements need to not scatter the entire infestation to the four winds when you fire off a round.  In Britain, they have some awesome CO2 rigs that are highly accurate and make little noise other than the pellet (.177, .2, .22) striking its target or what is behind the target.  YouTube search it to see what I'm talking about...
 
2014-04-23 10:39:49 AM  

The One True TheDavid: I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")


I wish I had video of the cat that had been adopted by one of our firehouses.  It was across from a grain elevator, so there were rats.  Big effing rats.  I saw that cat take after a rat that was easily 3/4 of  its size and maybe heavier.  That cat was a full bore badass.
 
2014-04-23 10:47:36 AM  
That's phat, Fatson.
store.acousticsounds.com
 
2014-04-23 10:50:01 AM  
Rats are pretty tremendously resilliant, smart, and most importantly, numerous.  For every 5 you kill, there are another 500 waiting around.

I sometimes wonder if they may be among the most successful mammal species on the planet.
 
2014-04-23 10:50:55 AM  

UberDave: Destructor: The One True TheDavid: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

The problem is with Britain itself, and it's irrational (and frankly, baffling) fear of guns. See people? This is what you get when you aren't allowed to protect yourself with firearms: Huge rats. Enjoy your liberty from guns. And say "hi" to the enormous rat gnawing your toe off.


Actually, they use pretty high-end pellet rifles equipped with custom night vision to control rat infestations.  And from experience (and someone who owns several rat-capable firearms), that's the better way.  It is easy to silence a pellet rifle which is one of the key elements need to not scatter the entire infestation to the four winds when you fire off a round.  In Britain, they have some awesome CO2 rigs that are highly accurate and make little noise other than the pellet (.177, .2, .22) striking its target or what is behind the target.  YouTube search it to see what I'm talking about...


Theoben rifles are very high-end, very costly and lovely guns.  I used to have a .22 Air Arms TX200 which was right on the legal limit.  I could kill rats, rabbits, pigeons, squirrels, etc. with ease at 60 yards.  It was a great gun.  It also made hunting much more successful than it would have been with a shotgun because as you rightly say, it didn't scare away every creature within a mile of the first shot.

The real problem with  Destructor'spost is the repetition of the "hurr durr, Brits don't have guns!  Herp derp" ignorance.  There are hundreds of thousand of legally owned firearms in this country.  This is not some big secret to anybody except abject morons.
 
2014-04-23 11:04:28 AM  
They need to design some mousers.
 
GCD
2014-04-23 11:24:05 AM  

durbnpoisn: Rats are pretty tremendously resilliant, smart, and most importantly, numerous.  For every 5 you kill, there are another 500 waiting around.*

I sometimes wonder if they may be among the most successful mammal species on the planet.


*Source needed.

I'm pretty sure that you may be confusing "rats" with "cockroaches"...
 
2014-04-23 11:27:19 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-04-23 11:36:09 AM  

tom baker's scarf: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x367]


I thought he got drafted.
 
2014-04-23 11:42:25 AM  

The Envoy: The real problem with Destructor'spost is the repetition of the "hurr durr, Brits don't have guns! Herp derp" ignorance. There are hundreds of thousand of legally owned firearms in this country. This is not some big secret to anybody except abject morons.


I was quite happy wallowing in my common American ignorance until you wrecked it with your very helpful information. Thank you. (And Happy St. George's day.)

Now I have to find a new country (or straw man) to point to and mock because they don't permit citizens to own guns... What does that leave? Australia?
 
2014-04-23 11:43:08 AM  

tom baker's scarf: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x367]


Aww man.... I loved all those books.
 
2014-04-23 11:43:32 AM  

The Envoy: The real problem with Destructor'spost is the repetition of the "hurr durr, Brits don't have guns! Herp derp" ignorance. There are hundreds of thousand of legally owned firearms in this country. This is not some big secret to anybody except abject morons.


But I'm led to believe that they're all long guns, and their whereabouts are pretty well known.  Don't you have to demonstrate some practical use for owning a rifle, like vermin control or something like that?
 
2014-04-23 11:44:10 AM  

Destructor: Now I have to find a new country (or straw man) to point to and mock because they don't permit citizens to own guns... What does that leave? Australia?


How about Chicago?

/ducks
 
2014-04-23 11:51:54 AM  

fireclown: Destructor: Now I have to find a new country (or straw man) to point to and mock because they don't permit citizens to own guns... What does that leave? Australia?

How about Chicago?

/ducks


I was using that forever... But then someone grew a brain and now you can own firearms in Chicago (although you do need a FOID card, and maybe some other permit... I forget. Fortunately, I don't live there).
 
2014-04-23 11:59:39 AM  
www.freewebs.com
 
2014-04-23 12:07:22 PM  
Their mice cousin's from mars that ride motorcycles are unimpressed.
 
2014-04-23 12:09:14 PM  
Sure that's, (cough,Idiocracy, cough) what it is.
 
2014-04-23 12:15:26 PM  
The solution to this is pretty easy actually. Some of the first wave of "true" robots will be single or limited functional requirement machines.

Such as a rat-terminator. We shape it like a giant rat. We can put it in grown fur and skin of a giant-super intelligent rat. They won't suspect a thing. Terminator Rat can casually approach the super-rats then BAM 6inch blade through the neck in under 100 milliseconds and onto the next. It'll be a rat holocaust, you watch.
 
2014-04-23 12:16:04 PM  

doglover: The One True TheDavid: Destructor:

Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

Don't be a pussy. Use what your namesake did.

img.fark.net


Oh come on. That vastly overtaxes my decrepit old troll's eye-hand coordination. Maybe something more like this:

www.big5sportinggoods.com
 
2014-04-23 12:26:41 PM  

The One True TheDavid: Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

I was thinking terriers and feists. Cats don't like to mess anything more than half their size but I've seen 5 lb Manchesters start shiat with Rotties. (And the big dog thinks "D00d! Decaf!")

But hey, somebody wants me to take on one of those things with only a .177 CO2-fired pellet? No way. Maybe a .243 Win. From a car. A block away.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 300x150]


No because its in England and guns are bad.
 
2014-04-23 12:30:52 PM  
fireclown:

I wish I had video of the cat that had been adopted by one of our firehouses. It was across from a grain elevator, so there were rats. Big effing rats. I saw that cat take after a rat that was easily 3/4 of its size and maybe heavier. That cat was a full bore badass.

The ex's cat likes to bring in (unharmed!) 4' gater snakes to play with and has no trouble playing Whack-A-Mutt with her 30# feist, but half-grown opossums make him quickly think of something else. Unless the dog is there: Boris hates to look like a pussy in front of his biatch.

Fortunately I'm free of macho hangups myself. As with my 12# Pomeranian 50# pit bulls don't scare me, but I'm wary of 3 month old kittens. They don't care who they chomp down on or how hard.
 
2014-04-23 12:31:22 PM  
Cluny is coming!

img4.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-04-23 12:33:57 PM  

Destructor: This is why we need super-huge cats.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Controlled, ideally, by witches.


Sure, court the apocalypse.

files.sharenator.com
 
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