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(PCWorld)   First online spam sent 20 years ago. Nigerian prince now serving his fourth term as king   (pcworld.com) divider line 18
    More: Interesting, key date, SMS  
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2868 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Apr 2014 at 8:54 AM (20 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-04-23 06:01:44 PM
2 votes:
My solution is quite simple. For every email an ISP receives coming from a domain that is not listed in the recipient's contacts list, the socket service simply adds a half-second delay to its response to the incoming email request.

If you're a user receiving 100 emails a day, that adds a unnoticeable 50-second delay to your incoming email stream. If you're a spammer sending a million spam emails a day, though, it effectively throttles your bandwidth down to 172,800 emails per day per targeted email server.

It's not a perfect solution, but it would eliminate a huge chunk of spam.
2014-04-23 03:05:43 PM
2 votes:
I remember the green card spam. They helpfully included a fax number, so a friend of mine taped together a couple of pieces of black construction paper, stuck them in his fax machine and made a loop out of them before dialing their fax number. IIRC, he let it run overnight, with the goal of wasting all their paper and burning out their fax printer head.
2014-04-23 12:56:07 PM
2 votes:

Slypork: maram500: Legally, I think you're obligated to beat the ever-loving snot out of WiM. This reads like a conversation with my mother--a woman who can't even so much as read instructions for her computer programs but is all too willing and happy to provide "tech support" for her friends...which usually boils down to "Unplug it, wait a few seconds, and plug it back in. That didn't work? *Shrug*"

That's my wife. She has killed every laptop she has ever had (last count: 6) because she installs games loaded with malware or at least toolbars. One time when her machine was on the fritz I let her borrow my work laptop for a couple hours. Now this was a high end work station replacement machine that I had used without problems for almost 2 years. She had it for not even one night and got a virus on it that was so bad we had to restore to the factory defaults.

My son and I are sure that if Skynet ever does become self-aware that all we have to do is have my wife talk with the evil computers and they'll all shut down.


I think I work with about 200 male and 200 female clones of your wife.
I have a firewall that actively scans all incoming traffic for threats, and filters the web for known attack sites and all kinds of sexy places to get viruses, each workstation has a fully updated hybrid cloud and local antivirus, I have blocked basically any attachment that has ever carried a viral payload, we run our own mail server and extremely paranoid Spamassassin And they STILL find ways to get infections. It is always some horrible zero day bullshiat too. Got a user the other day who got a new variant of cryptolocker. Their description was pretty funny though. "I think my computer is threatening to kill me." Luckily I am a good sysadmin and I have a backup of the guy's data.

Actually on a related note I found this : From the Bleeping Computer forums http://www.foolishiat.com/vb6-projects/cryptoprevent/  which I am in the process of testing before deployment.
2014-04-23 01:34:55 PM
1 votes:
My name is Dave Rhodes...
2014-04-23 01:31:21 PM
1 votes:

Odoriferous Queef: Harry Freakstorm: WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.

*Actual quote from WiM

Someone needs to introduced to the LART.


Or the BOFH.
2014-04-23 11:44:21 AM
1 votes:
That article is completely wrong.  They are off by 14 years.  The first spam email was sent on May 3rd, 1978.

http://www.geekosystem.com/first-spam-email/
2014-04-23 11:16:15 AM
1 votes:

Slypork: maram500: Legally, I think you're obligated to beat the ever-loving snot out of WiM. This reads like a conversation with my mother--a woman who can't even so much as read instructions for her computer programs but is all too willing and happy to provide "tech support" for her friends...which usually boils down to "Unplug it, wait a few seconds, and plug it back in. That didn't work? *Shrug*"

That's my wife. She has killed every laptop she has ever had (last count: 6) because she installs games loaded with malware or at least toolbars. One time when her machine was on the fritz I let her borrow my work laptop for a couple hours. Now this was a high end work station replacement machine that I had used without problems for almost 2 years. She had it for not even one night and got a virus on it that was so bad we had to restore to the factory defaults.

My son and I are sure that if Skynet ever does become self-aware that all we have to do is have my wife talk with the evil computers and they'll all shut down.


My mother lets one of her granddaughters get on our desktop computer unsupervised. Because there is no way a seven-year-old with no concept of safety or security or computers is going to cause trouble. Of course, I get blamed when shiat goes wrong with the thing, but both my niece and mother just go a-clicking away on whatever they want to.

...these are the same kids who at the tender age of 4 years were exposed to Law & Order SVU, R-rated movies, and parents who, while still technically married, are separated, sleeping with other people, and got their latest partners pregnant. So common sense and decency are essentially foreign concepts.
2014-04-23 11:12:16 AM
1 votes:

Harry Freakstorm: WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.

*Actual quote from WiM



A cluebat would be a good idea
www.userfriendly.org
2014-04-23 11:11:01 AM
1 votes:
Paging Jay Furr, paging Jay Furr.

I know you're around here somewhere. I've seen you.

My question: how long between initial spamming and the coining of the term?
2014-04-23 11:07:09 AM
1 votes:

Harry Freakstorm: WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.

*Actual quote from WiM


Someone needs to introduced to the LART.
2014-04-23 10:59:49 AM
1 votes:

maram500: Legally, I think you're obligated to beat the ever-loving snot out of WiM. This reads like a conversation with my mother--a woman who can't even so much as read instructions for her computer programs but is all too willing and happy to provide "tech support" for her friends...which usually boils down to "Unplug it, wait a few seconds, and plug it back in. That didn't work? *Shrug*"


That's my wife. She has killed every laptop she has ever had (last count: 6) because she installs games loaded with malware or at least toolbars. One time when her machine was on the fritz I let her borrow my work laptop for a couple hours. Now this was a high end work station replacement machine that I had used without problems for almost 2 years. She had it for not even one night and got a virus on it that was so bad we had to restore to the factory defaults.

My son and I are sure that if Skynet ever does become self-aware that all we have to do is have my wife talk with the evil computers and they'll all shut down.
2014-04-23 09:50:49 AM
1 votes:

Harry Freakstorm: Like it was yesterday...

Hell, er Help desk. How may I help you?
Woman in Manufacturing: Hello. I just got this e-mail from a guy who says if I forward it, I'll get a check based on how many people I forward it to.
Me: Oh that's Spam. It's junk mail. You can delete it.
WiM: Oh, I already forwarded it to everyone here at work.
Me: Oh. Well, I'm sure they'll appreciate it. As long as you didn't reply t the sender with all our e-mails.
WiM: But that's what I did.
Me: You just turned over the company's e-mail directory to a bunch of scammers. We'll be getting a lot of junk mail very soon.
WiM: You should have told us not to reply to unsolicited e-mails
Me: Do you answer every piece of junk mail that you get at home?
WiM: No. But this is business. It's a good business practice/
Me: Hey look. In addition to your e-mail, I just got a piece of spam offering "real Rotex Watches". Awesome.
WiM: Well, do something to stop it.
Me: Well, we have a Lotus Notes server and the 'administrator' is in Milwaukee. Why don't you e-mail him? He doesn't reply to any of mine messages or phone calls. Probably because he doesn't know anything about Lotus Notes and doesn't have the sense to pour the piss out of his boots.
WiM: Call me when you've fixed this. I can't handle all these distractions!*

Boss: I'm suddenly getting a lot of spam. What happened?
Me: (WiM) Sent our directory to a spammer. You want me to call the Notes Admin?
Boss: Naw. He doesn't have the sense to pour the piss out of his own boots. You do something. I'm gonna disappear for four hours.
Me: This won't go away in four hours.
Boss: Okay, five. (Poof - Gone)

Me: (E-mail to All) In light of the recent increase in Spam, e-mail that is not requested and may contain dubious promises, I have set up a Spam folder on the Lotus Notes server. Please click here to add it to your e-mail account. Drag all suspected messages to this folder without opening or replying.

WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.

*Actual quote from WiM


Legally, I think you're obligated to beat the ever-loving snot out of WiM. This reads like a conversation with my mother--a woman who can't even so much as read instructions for her computer programs but is all too willing and happy to provide "tech support" for her friends...which usually boils down to "Unplug it, wait a few seconds, and plug it back in. That didn't work? *Shrug*"
2014-04-23 09:38:10 AM
1 votes:
Been there, have the t-shirt.

img.fark.net
/still waiting for the idiots to sue me
2014-04-23 09:37:39 AM
1 votes:

Harry Freakstorm: WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.


Please tell me you knocked her down a peg or disabled flash on her machine or SOMETHING.  People this stupid who put their stupidity on display are infuriating.
2014-04-23 09:25:30 AM
1 votes:
Like it was yesterday...

Hell, er Help desk. How may I help you?
Woman in Manufacturing: Hello. I just got this e-mail from a guy who says if I forward it, I'll get a check based on how many people I forward it to.
Me: Oh that's Spam. It's junk mail. You can delete it.
WiM: Oh, I already forwarded it to everyone here at work.
Me: Oh. Well, I'm sure they'll appreciate it. As long as you didn't reply t the sender with all our e-mails.
WiM: But that's what I did.
Me: You just turned over the company's e-mail directory to a bunch of scammers. We'll be getting a lot of junk mail very soon.
WiM: You should have told us not to reply to unsolicited e-mails
Me: Do you answer every piece of junk mail that you get at home?
WiM: No. But this is business. It's a good business practice/
Me: Hey look. In addition to your e-mail, I just got a piece of spam offering "real Rotex Watches". Awesome.
WiM: Well, do something to stop it.
Me: Well, we have a Lotus Notes server and the 'administrator' is in Milwaukee. Why don't you e-mail him? He doesn't reply to any of mine messages or phone calls. Probably because he doesn't know anything about Lotus Notes and doesn't have the sense to pour the piss out of his boots.
WiM: Call me when you've fixed this. I can't handle all these distractions!*

Boss: I'm suddenly getting a lot of spam. What happened?
Me: (WiM) Sent our directory to a spammer. You want me to call the Notes Admin?
Boss: Naw. He doesn't have the sense to pour the piss out of his own boots. You do something. I'm gonna disappear for four hours.
Me: This won't go away in four hours.
Boss: Okay, five. (Poof - Gone)

Me: (E-mail to All) In light of the recent increase in Spam, e-mail that is not requested and may contain dubious promises, I have set up a Spam folder on the Lotus Notes server. Please click here to add it to your e-mail account. Drag all suspected messages to this folder without opening or replying.

WiM (e-Mail to All) Once again, I have to do our tech support. People who are getting these 'Spammed' e-mails can open the message and select "Remove me from future e-mails". That will take care of it. You're welcome, tech support.

*Actual quote from WiM
2014-04-23 09:21:16 AM
1 votes:

kling_klang_bed: "Shatter Her Meat Tunnel"


Well, that just sounds pleasant for everyone involved. Where do I sign up? My wife was commenting the other day on how she wished my dick was so big that it would physically destroy her reproductive organs. You're just not a real man unless you leave her broken and bleeding.
2014-04-23 09:08:36 AM
1 votes:
Yeah but some of us get back at those Nigerian princes in style:

i63.photobucket.com

/If you care to see how this was done, here ya go:   Warning: very long read
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-04-23 08:43:27 AM
1 votes:
I remember the green card spam. It wasn't the first ad that annoyed people, but it was the biggest to date.

A more significant moment may be this one from the infographic:

1996: In Cyber Promotions vs. America Online, the District Court of Penn. rules that spam filtering is legal.

You don't have a constitutional right to use an internet forum (cue xkcd) and the channel from spammer to spammee is not subject to common carrier "must carry" rules.
 
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