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(Talking Points Memo)   When you make a "run for the border" in your car, try not to do it at 2:00 a.m. when you're shiathammered drunk. That goes double if you're a Florida state representative   (talkingpointsmemo.com) divider line 30
    More: Florida, Taco Bell, GOP, state legislative, Tallahassee Democrat, Chambers of parliament  
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3680 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2014 at 7:32 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-22 04:28:31 PM  
The officers said Eagle's eyes were bloodshot and they smelled alcohol on his breath, according to the documents. Eagle told the officers he didn't drink any alcohol that night, despite stumbling out of his vehicle, and attributed the alcohol smell to friends he had driven that had been out at a bar.

the party of personal responsibility™!
 
2014-04-22 04:35:52 PM  
I thought that was the ONLY time people ate Taco Bell.
 
2014-04-22 07:28:27 PM  
I believe the next step is blaming the media for perpetuating this private matter between him and his family, then asserting that Jesus has forgiven him, then introducing new legislation octupling DUI penalties, then getting caught in the Champagne Room at Tampa's Mon Venus using his office credit card to pay two midget strippers to pelt each other with poorly-sliced government cheese while a shaved twink sits on the Reps' lap and reads Rush Limbaugh's kids book aloud in an "ethnic" voice
 
2014-04-22 07:39:28 PM  
How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?
 
2014-04-22 07:41:26 PM  

Relatively Obscure: I thought that was the ONLY time people ate Taco Bell.


Yup.
 
2014-04-22 07:45:09 PM  

Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?


I'm really hoping he was going for Georgia, otherwise he had a LONG drive ahead if him.
 
2014-04-22 07:51:45 PM  
Can you really blame a guy for living mas?
 
2014-04-22 07:52:02 PM  
I'm going to open a Taco Bell that delivers. You'd have to order at least $10 worth of food, and I will charge a $1.25 delivery fee (you're still encouraged to tip the driver, please)
 
2014-04-22 07:52:51 PM  
www.matazone.co.uk
 
2014-04-22 08:10:32 PM  

Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?


Its not an island
 
2014-04-22 08:15:29 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?

Its not an island


No man is an island.

He's a peninsula

/nothing is obscure on Fark or so I was told.
 
2014-04-22 08:28:13 PM  
Maybe he was hoping to use the Taco Bell to try and pick up a young male intern.
 
2014-04-22 08:31:14 PM  
"Until then, I humbly ask for everyone's patience. I know that I am accountable for my actions, and I look forward to communicating with my constituents in the near future on this matter."

trans ~  I need to lay low on this matter until something else newsworthy eclipses this issue.
 
2014-04-22 08:38:42 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?

Its not an island


Yeah, but even Floridians wouldn't run for GEORGIA.
 
2014-04-22 08:40:00 PM  
State legislators in Minnesota can legally drive three sheets to the wind during session. They have literal 'get out of jail free' cards signed by the Secretary of State.
 
2014-04-22 08:51:30 PM  

FlashHarry: The officers said Eagle's eyes were bloodshot and they smelled alcohol on his breath, according to the documents. Eagle told the officers he didn't drink any alcohol that night, despite stumbling out of his vehicle, and attributed the alcohol smell to friends he had driven that had been out at a bar.

the party of personal responsibility™!


You are taking this out of context. This guy is the embodiment of personal responsibility- he said "I am good to get home". He is so bootstrappy- he doesn't need a ride from cops, only lazy welfare queens take up jail cells- this ole boy is drunk on freedom
 
2014-04-22 08:57:25 PM  

largedon: Maybe he was hoping to use the Taco Bell to try and pick up a young male intern.


Said Taco Bell borders FSU's campus as well as the "urban" part of town.  There is no way an intern was there at 2 in the morning.  More likely is that he was trying to pull a Limbaugh
 
2014-04-22 09:06:26 PM  
Ever get the feeling that the last thirty years of new jack, trustafarian, white bread, "my dad got me elected" politicos are a crop of mongs whom you wouldn't let change your oil, but look good in the suit their uncle bought them?
 
2014-04-22 09:09:55 PM  

Gyrfalcon: Igor Jakovsky: Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?

Its not an island

Yeah, but even Floridians wouldn't run for GEORGIA.


Theoretically they could run for Alabama
 
2014-04-22 09:18:36 PM  

HaywoodJablonski: Gyrfalcon: Igor Jakovsky: Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?

Its not an island

Yeah, but even Floridians wouldn't run for GEORGIA.

Theoretically they could run for Alabama


Even Floridians aren't that retarded.
 
2014-04-22 09:20:52 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I believe the next step is blaming the media for perpetuating this private matter between him and his family, then asserting that Jesus has forgiven him, then introducing new legislation octupling DUI penalties, then getting caught in the Champagne Room at Tampa's Mon Venus using his office credit card to pay two midget strippers to pelt each other with poorly-sliced government cheese while a shaved twink sits on the Reps' lap and reads Rush Limbaugh's kids book aloud in an "ethnic" voice


That seems incredibly well thought out, almost like this might be a recurring planned out fantasy of sorts.  So where do I sign up to tag along?
 
2014-04-22 09:34:55 PM  

gfid: Igor Jakovsky: Gyrfalcon: How can you make a "run for the border" in Florida? Isn't the whole state surrounded by water?

Its not an island

No man is an island.

He's a peninsula

/nothing is obscure on Fark or so I was told.


matthau.com
 
2014-04-22 09:38:57 PM  
Hey SW Florida, you get what you pay for.
 
2014-04-22 09:41:04 PM  
Republican?

Yep. ( although, I guess being a Florida State Representative means that one is probably a member of the GOP)

/ truly, the party of "personal responsibility"
 
2014-04-22 09:48:58 PM  

Mark Ratner: I'm going to open a Taco Bell that delivers. You'd have to order at least $10 worth of food, and I will charge a $1.25 delivery fee (you're still encouraged to tip the driver, please)


If you're charging a delivery fee and not making money in the food you can probably eliminate the minimum. Plus it's less to order/carry and people have more money for tips.

/I wish Sonic delivered when I'm hung over
 
2014-04-22 10:26:33 PM  
Eagle's eyes. Heh.

FTA: "While there are some decisions that I would have made differently, I do not believe there is a complete and accurate picture of the events," Eagle said in a written statement released through an aide. "Under advice of my legal counsel, I cannot discuss all the details right now...."

Please don't tell me he's gonna fight the DUI charge.

Not long ago, Western Australia's highest paid government worker [more $$$ than the state's Premier] was driving with his wife and she got busted for p!ssy driving. And of course the law doesn't apply to them and the farking egomaniacs CHALLENGED THE DUI CHARGE. She ended up stopping the appeal at the 11th hour, but why bother appealing in the first place? Just farking man up. No farking excuses.

Neale Fong also had a GIANT-ASSED portrait of himself installed in the foyer of his government offices. Hahahaha what a tool.

// end strawman rant
 
2014-04-22 11:33:22 PM  
FTFA:    The lawmaker then refused a sobriety test and told officers he was "good to get home,"

The Huffington Post noted that Eagle filed a bill last month that would subject elected or appointed officials from Florida to drug testing -- everyone from lawmakers to judges to school district officials. Under Eagle's bill, an official who refused such a test would be forced to resign.

Think he'll stand by his own legislation and resign?   Yeah, right.
 
2014-04-23 12:02:34 AM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I believe the next step is blaming the media for perpetuating this private matter between him and his family, then asserting that Jesus has forgiven him, then introducing new legislation octupling DUI penalties, then getting caught in the Champagne Room at Tampa's Mon Venus using his office credit card to pay two midget strippers to pelt each other with poorly-sliced government cheese while a shaved twink sits on the Reps' lap and reads Rush Limbaugh's kids book aloud in an "ethnic" voice


You've either started drinking or you've had this conversation before. Or both. Or something.
 
2014-04-23 08:16:50 AM  
Tallahassee's about thirty minutes from the Georgia border.

This happens every year during the legislative session.  I'm shocked it doesn't happen more.  The legislative session schedule, especially if you're a younger, low on the totem pole guy, is - wake up at six, work till six pm.  Go out afterwards and work some more at the restaurants and bars, schmoozing and drinking until the wee hours, then wake up and do it all over again.  On Fridays you get to drive back to your district for family time.  If you're lucky, you get to fly out of Tallahassee's amazing airport.
 
2014-04-23 09:49:40 AM  
We don't have this problem in Minnesota. We give our state reps a get out of DUI free card.  Would want them to miss an important vote because they were sh@tfaced would we.
 
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