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(Gawker)   Man crowdfunds penis surgery for his pet tortoise so he can come out of his shell   (gawker.com) divider line 24
    More: Strange, Miles Jelfs, Oculus Rift, Zach Braff  
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2321 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2014 at 3:00 AM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



24 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-22 12:55:04 AM  

P     e     n     i     s     .

 
2014-04-22 01:25:39 AM  
Do people that give at the 100 quid level get banged really slowly?
 
2014-04-22 02:22:42 AM  
The lil guy looks so enthusiastic about it I'd probably let him ravage me if he wanted.
 
2014-04-22 02:49:26 AM  
There's just something about a tortoise's face that makes me smile. They're such cute little fellas.
 
2014-04-22 03:03:24 AM  
1.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com
Turtle O face. Oh. Oh. Oh. You know what I'm talking bout. Oh.
 
2014-04-22 03:03:28 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: There's just something about a tortoise's face that makes me smile. They're such cute little fellas.


i.imgur.com
 
2014-04-22 03:05:47 AM  
My ex had a turtle. It escaped and ran away. True story.
 
2014-04-22 03:08:32 AM  
www.hollywoodreporter.com
                                Ohh... My... GOD!
 
2014-04-22 03:09:41 AM  
So is the turtle circumcised or does it have a turtleneck?
 
2014-04-22 03:15:23 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: So is the turtle circumcised or does it have a turtleneck?


It's going to need it amputated entirely in a few years since he's too small right now. His regimen of supplements will allow him to put on weight so he can undergo the operation.

So he'll be a Teenage Mutilated Ninja Turtle.
 
2014-04-22 03:18:48 AM  
i1.ytimg.com


//oblig
 
2014-04-22 03:20:56 AM  

brap: Do people that give at the 100 quid level get banged really slowly?


Amway style!
 
2014-04-22 03:23:11 AM  

Weatherkiss: Danger Avoid Death: So is the turtle circumcised or does it have a turtleneck?

It's going to need it amputated entirely in a few years since he's too small right now. His regimen of supplements will allow him to put on weight so he can undergo the operation.

So he'll be a Teenage Mutilated Ninja Turtle.


Cowabunga.
 
2014-04-22 04:31:28 AM  
As someone who actually did a version of CPR on my baby turtle (hung him upside down, had the ex push his arms in and out and pump out the water, breathed a few times through my cupped hands, etc) I'd have given a couple bucks. When you're given responsibility over a baby or toddler animal, something just snaps.
 
Skr
2014-04-22 04:50:27 AM  
Sheeit, article says they have to amputate the affected area when he gets bigger.
Will he ever smile again?
static.fjcdn.com
 
2014-04-22 04:53:01 AM  

Weatherkiss: Bathia_Mapes: There's just something about a tortoise's face that makes me smile. They're such cute little fellas.

[i.imgur.com image 750x500]


Human tortoises not applicable :-D
 
Rat
2014-04-22 05:04:53 AM  
img.fark.net

™ I shouldn't have to be the one posting this so far down the page
 
2014-04-22 05:12:03 AM  
If "pet tortoise" is a fitting nickname for his penis, I can understand why he'd want surgery.
 
2014-04-22 06:01:40 AM  

Dansker: If "pet tortoise" is a fitting nickname for his penis, I can understand why he'd want surgery.


www.elgoog.cc
 
2014-04-22 06:46:19 AM  
Stupid farking hipster. Don't get a pet, any pet if you can't afford a lousy two hundred bucks for a vet visit.
 
2014-04-22 07:13:44 AM  

abhorrent1: Stupid farking hipster. Don't get a pet, any pet if you can't afford a lousy two hundred bucks for a vet visit.


Agree!  Also, this crowd funding thing is getting out of control.  An ex-friend just did a GoFundMe campaign to pay for funeral travel.  Took the cash and went on vacation instead.

/nope, didn't donate to that shiat
//feel sorry for the suckers that did
 
2014-04-22 09:34:42 AM  
I guess we can also call breast cancer surgery, "boob surgery" and come to the same ill informed negative conclusion.
 
2014-04-22 11:43:53 AM  

Fista-Phobia: [www.hollywoodreporter.com image 349x466]
                                Ohh... My... GOD!


I'm not sure and and and correct me if I'm wrong but I think I see ...
 
2014-04-22 12:26:44 PM  
What about coming IN his shell?

Just asking for a friend.
 
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