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(Talking Points Memo)   Bill Kristol finishes filling out his latest Mad LIb and declares a Clinton/Petraeus ticket for 2016   (talkingpointsmemo.com) divider line 89
    More: Dumbass, Mad Libs, William Kristol, Petraeus  
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854 clicks; posted to Politics » on 21 Apr 2014 at 5:34 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-21 04:05:30 PM  
There is literally no scenario where this makes any sense. I feel like Kristol has become self-aware and is now making predictions with the intent that the opposite come true.
 
2014-04-21 04:07:39 PM  
Bill Krystol was sitting under an apple tree and the apple shot into space.
 
2014-04-21 04:10:33 PM  
He should change jobs and become one of those crime fighting psychics that finds dead kids.

/They would never find any dead kids, but at least people wouldn't have any false hope, because he is *always* farking wrong.
 
2014-04-21 04:10:44 PM  

DamnYankees: There is literally no scenario where this makes any sense. I feel like Kristol has become self-aware and is now making predictions with the intent that the opposite come true.


Petraeus/Clinton 2016?
 
2014-04-21 04:12:17 PM  
Bill Kristol is at it once again and his latest forecast is a doozy: a Hillary Clinton- David Petraeus 2016 presidential ticket.

Yeah, he's got to know he's just trolling at this point.
 
2014-04-21 04:13:54 PM  
Bill Kristol took a test of true/false questions, and answered every question "C".
 
2014-04-21 04:16:43 PM  
I once flipped a quarter and told Bill Kristol to call Heads or Tails. He called "$1.70"
 
2014-04-21 04:18:14 PM  
That's marvelous. Simply marvelous.
 
2014-04-21 04:20:23 PM  
How is it possible for the son of Irving Kristol to turn out like Bill Kristol? It defies the laws of nature.
 
2014-04-21 04:24:31 PM  

Diogenes: Bill Kristol is at it once again and his latest forecast is a doozy: a Hillary Clinton- David Petraeus 2016 presidential ticket.

Yeah, he's got to know he's just trolling at this point.


Separated at birth?

static.comicvine.com  graphics8.nytimes.com
 
2014-04-21 04:27:26 PM  
Bill Krystol told me to hold on 9 when the dealer was showing 18.
 
2014-04-21 04:29:24 PM  
Rand Paul and Ted Cruz ticket for GOP.
 
2014-04-21 04:43:17 PM  
I think the problem is that on Saturday, Bill said "Tomorrow is 4/20", and reality simply HAD to ensure he was wrong (else the fabric of the universe would surely be rent asunder), so he's baked out of his gourd today instead.

// I realize he likely "said" this weeks ago
 
2014-04-21 04:57:54 PM  

Delta1212: Petraeus/Clinton 2016?


This is Bill Kristol we're talking about:

i.imgur.com

/book it, done.
 
2014-04-21 05:11:05 PM  

what_now: Bill Krystol told me to hold on 9 when the dealer was showing 18.


He told me to invest everything I had in Beenz.com.
 
2014-04-21 05:16:42 PM  
Oh yah, Petraeus doesn't have ANNNNNY baggage.  Nevermind the whole "security leak" with the woman he was having an extra-marital affair with.  Nah...That's cool.
 
2014-04-21 05:21:00 PM  
He's more troll now than man, twisted and evil.


/is there an off chance he meant Wesley Clark?
 
2014-04-21 05:25:03 PM  

Ambivalence: Nevermind the whole "security leak" with the woman he was having an extra-marital affair with.


upload.wikimedia.org i.imgur.com

i.imgur.com

War Heroes have not been doing well in U.S. Presidential elections recently anyway. He would be a drag on the ticket, and he's not know for his bulldoggishness, a quality you need in a VP candidate these days.
 
2014-04-21 05:36:44 PM  
trollin' trollin' trollin'
keep the BS rollin'
Raw Hide!
 
2014-04-21 05:38:43 PM  
Bill Kristol once told me that grass was green.  I looked outside and all the plant life in my yard was dead.
 
2014-04-21 05:38:59 PM  
So this means we'll actually get the Tyson/Nye ticket I keep hearing about?

/Y'all motherfarkers need science.
 
2014-04-21 05:39:28 PM  
Hey he picked Palin for McCain

That led to endless entertainment

Give Kristol a break here
 
2014-04-21 05:39:42 PM  
Well, I see that my days of not taking Bill Kristol seriously are certainly drawing to a middle...
 
2014-04-21 05:44:43 PM  
Joe Biden should stay VP regardless of who runs for president.
 
2014-04-21 05:44:45 PM  
Bill Kristol is the kind of guy who tries to quietly squeak out a fart and violently shiats himself each and every time.
 
2014-04-21 05:47:11 PM  

Somacandra: Ambivalence: Nevermind the whole "security leak" with the woman he was having an extra-marital affair with.

War Heroes have not been doing well in U.S. Presidential elections recently anyway. He would be a drag on the ticket, and he's not know for his bulldoggishness, a quality you need in a VP candidate these days.


Having an extramarital affair is almost mainstream in politics.  I was specificly referring to leaking classified information to the person he was sleeping with.  That shows a criminal lack of judgement on his part.
 
2014-04-21 05:48:37 PM  

Ambivalence: Having an extramarital affair is almost mainstream in politics. I was specificly referring to leaking classified information to the person he was sleeping with. That shows a criminal lack of judgement on his part.


I dunno, man. She was kinda hot.
 
2014-04-21 05:50:20 PM  
I was wondering how to feel about a Clinton nomination. She's certainly better than any Republican name out there right now but I also don't think she's the type who would make some of the big changes that need to be made.

But now that Kristol has predicted a Clinton ticket I can rest assured that she won't make it through the primary.
 
2014-04-21 05:51:32 PM  

HooskerDoo: I dunno, man. She was kinda hot.


Indeed, but a stone cold bunny boiler.
 
2014-04-21 05:52:47 PM  

WTF Indeed: How is it possible for the son of Irving Kristol to turn out like Bill Kristol? It defies the laws of nature.


I remember back in the late '90s when Ira Katznelson, an eminent political scientist at Columbia, came to deliver a guest lecture to an economic philosophy class I was taking. It was a great lecture, made more so by the fact that the class was only about ten or twelve students and we got got ask all kinds of questions and got a lot of great, provocative answers.

Anyhow, Prof. Katznelson described a lunch he had with Irving Kristol back either during the first Bush administration. The talk turned to William Kristol, then Dan Quayle's chief of staff, and how he got his start in politics. Irving recalled how he talked to his friend Harvey Mansfield at Harvard, who secured William a place there as both an undergrad and graduate student; how he talked to Pat Moynihan, then Nixon's domestic policy adviser, and got William an internship at The White House; how he talked to friends at the RNC and secured a job for William after he got his Harvard Ph.D.; and how he arranged with still more friends for William to teach at UPenn and the Kennedy School of Government. With that, Prof. Katznelson recalled, he then asked Irving what he thought of affirmative action. "I oppose it", Irving replied. "It subverts meritocracy."
 
2014-04-21 05:53:23 PM  

odinsposse: I was wondering how to feel about a Clinton nomination. She's certainly better than any Republican name out there right now but I also don't think she's the type who would make some of the big changes that need to be made.

But now that Kristol has predicted a Clinton ticket I can rest assured that she won't make it through the primary.


The one big change would be on the Supreme Court.
 
2014-04-21 06:06:01 PM  
 
2014-04-21 06:08:36 PM  
ITYM Mad Con?
 
2014-04-21 06:13:17 PM  

theorellior: WTF Indeed: How is it possible for the son of Irving Kristol to turn out like Bill Kristol? It defies the laws of nature.

I remember back in the late '90s when Ira Katznelson, an eminent political scientist at Columbia, came to deliver a guest lecture to an economic philosophy class I was taking. It was a great lecture, made more so by the fact that the class was only about ten or twelve students and we got got ask all kinds of questions and got a lot of great, provocative answers.

Anyhow, Prof. Katznelson described a lunch he had with Irving Kristol back either during the first Bush administration. The talk turned to William Kristol, then Dan Quayle's chief of staff, and how he got his start in politics. Irving recalled how he talked to his friend Harvey Mansfield at Harvard, who secured William a place there as both an undergrad and graduate student; how he talked to Pat Moynihan, then Nixon's domestic policy adviser, and got William an internship at The White House; how he talked to friends at the RNC and secured a job for William after he got his Harvard Ph.D.; and how he arranged with still more friends for William to teach at UPenn and the Kennedy School of Government. With that, Prof. Katznelson recalled, he then asked Irving what he thought of affirmative action. "I oppose it", Irving replied. "It subverts meritocracy."


So Bill Kristol is the Gwyneth Paltrow of punditry?
 
2014-04-21 06:16:16 PM  
How about no?
 
2014-04-21 06:17:45 PM  

odinsposse: I was wondering how to feel about a Clinton nomination. She's certainly better than any Republican name out there right now but I also don't think she's the type who would make some of the big changes that need to be made.


Nobody from either party is going to be making any big changes until both houses of Congress are held by the same party, and the Senate with a super majority.

What Clinton will do, as effectively as any other Democrat, is keep Congressional Republicans from raping the country too hard.
 
2014-04-21 06:19:41 PM  
Wasn't there a link on Fark a few months ago to an article where Bill Kristol predicted Hillary wouldn't run?  Is he now just predicting all possible answers so he can pretend to have at least gotten one right?
 
2014-04-21 06:21:32 PM  
Biggus Dickus / Incontinenta Buttocks in 2016
 
2014-04-21 06:21:52 PM  

uknesvuinng: Wasn't there a link on Fark a few months ago to an article where Bill Kristol predicted Hillary wouldn't run?  Is he now just predicting all possible answers so he can pretend to have at least gotten one right?


And yet somehow, he will still end up wrong.
 
2014-04-21 06:22:34 PM  

Baz744: odinsposse: I was wondering how to feel about a Clinton nomination. She's certainly better than any Republican name out there right now but I also don't think she's the type who would make some of the big changes that need to be made.

Nobody from either party is going to be making any big changes until both houses of Congress are held by the same party, and the Senate with a super majority.

What Clinton will do, as effectively as any other Democrat, is keep Congressional Republicans from raping the country too hard.


I'm not persuaded that Clinton would want to make any big changes even if she could. The Democratic establishment in which she is entrenched is happy to be as centrist as the Republican party will let it -- and right now, that is very, very centrist indeed.
 
2014-04-21 06:25:22 PM  

Rhaab: So this means we'll actually get the Tyson/Nye ticket I keep hearing about?

/Y'all motherfarkers need science.


Yeah, let's see the attack ads about the man who eliminated the planet Pluto.
 
2014-04-21 06:31:02 PM  
i149.photobucket.com
 
2014-04-21 06:42:04 PM  
Has Bill Kristol ever not been wrong about something? Anything?

/quantum wrongness.
 
2014-04-21 06:43:52 PM  
If Bill Kristol predicted the sun would rise tomorrow, I'd be sure to lay in a supply of lanterns and candles.
 
2014-04-21 06:46:22 PM  

SilentStrider: Bill Kristol took a test of true/false questions, and answered every question "C".


I'd have to give him a pass on this. I once put "1" on a true false test. Although in my defense I was really hung over.
 
2014-04-21 06:47:06 PM  

carrion_luggage: So Bill Kristol is the Gwyneth Paltrow of punditry?


No, Gwyneth does have some actual talent under all that being an asshole.

He's the Talia Shire of American punditry.
 
2014-04-21 06:49:55 PM  

Dwight_Yeast: carrion_luggage: So Bill Kristol is the Gwyneth Paltrow of punditry?

No, Gwyneth does have some actual talent under all that being an asshole.

He's the Talia Shire of American punditry.


One of a very small handful of actresses to have appeared in two trilogies.
 
2014-04-21 06:50:30 PM  

Gaddiel: SilentStrider: Bill Kristol took a test of true/false questions, and answered every question "C".

I'd have to give him a pass on this. I once put "1" on a true false test. Although in my defense I was really hung over.


I'd give him a pass simply because I am positive at this point that Bill Kristol cannot determine between fact or fiction.
 
2014-04-21 06:54:00 PM  
How does someone so consistently wrong keep working? Does he give great blowjobs or something?

/here's some brain bleach for that last image:
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-04-21 06:57:27 PM  

DamnYankees: There is literally no scenario where this makes any sense.


He's trying to damage Hillary's credibility and candidacy with the old "guilt by association" trick. Petraeus has too much baggage to run, so they have to do something to hurt her.

It's part of the long game. Right now, all other Democrats are afraid to run against Hillary. Some Republicans, notably Jon Huntsman, are also bowing out of 2016 because they don't think the GOP has a chance against her.

But, if enough doubt can be raised, some other Democrats might jump in the race and force Hillary to fight hard for the nomination in the primaries and waste valuable resources that could be saved for the general election.
 
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