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(Chicago Sun-Times)   Guy who drove his truck into a restaurant survives after being hit by train later that night. Lay odds on boat or plane tri-fecta to the right   (posttrib.suntimes.com) divider line 28
    More: Dumbass, trains  
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2087 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Apr 2014 at 4:53 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-20 01:06:39 PM  
OK- I say 1000 to 1 against a boat or plane unless alcohol is involved then I'll drop it 3 to 1- any takers?
 
2014-04-20 04:06:44 PM  
Trains are big, heavy, noisy things. Near crossroads they usually give several warning blasts of their horns. If the engineer sees someone by the tracks along the line, he'll usually lay on his horn.

Plus a train makes the ground shake coming and going.

Now, walking alongside the tracks with a cell to your ear does not mean you can't notice a million pound train sneaking up on you. Especially at night, with that million candlepower headlight swinging back and forth.

So, what was this guys excuse?
 
2014-04-20 04:55:09 PM  
Plus a train makes the ground shake coming and going.

Now, walking alongside the tracks with a cell to your ear does not mean you can't notice a million pound train sneaking up on you. Especially at night, with that million candlepower headlight swinging back and forth.

So, what was this guys excuse?


he sounds like a real winner     (sarcasm)
 
2014-04-20 04:58:28 PM  
Based on the article I'm going to guess he was chatting on his cell phone while avoiding the pot hole and when walking next to the train.
 
GBB
2014-04-20 05:00:01 PM  
TFAWitnesses later told police Cooper appeared to be talking on a cellphone when he was struck from behind by a train and thrown off the tracks. Cooper's condition was upgraded on Saturday to stupid.
 
2014-04-20 05:02:21 PM  

GBB: TFA:  Witnesses later told police Cooper appeared to be talking on a cellphone when he was struck from behind by a train and thrown off the tracks. Cooper's condition was upgraded on Saturday to stupid.


What a space cadet...

media2.s-nbcnews.com
 
2014-04-20 05:03:33 PM  
Now all he needs is a plane, and he'll earn the Plains, Trains, and Automobiles achievement.
 
2014-04-20 05:04:11 PM  

Rik01: Trains are big, heavy, noisy things. Near crossroads they usually give several warning blasts of their horns. If the engineer sees someone by the tracks along the line, he'll usually lay on his horn.

Plus a train makes the ground shake coming and going.

Now, walking alongside the tracks with a cell to your ear does not mean you can't notice a million pound train sneaking up on you. Especially at night, with that million candlepower headlight swinging back and forth.

So, what was this guys excuse?


Oblivious cell phone users are oblivious.

/goodcat.jpg
 
2014-04-20 05:06:30 PM  
My money is on meteor
 
2014-04-20 05:07:24 PM  
Then there was the texting girl who walked between two cars on the Montreal Green Line. No one noticed anything until a couple of stations down the line when someone saw blood and parts on the tracks.
 
2014-04-20 05:10:02 PM  
when?
 
2014-04-20 05:13:36 PM  
 
2014-04-20 05:20:12 PM  

gingerjet: Based on the article I'm going to guess he was chatting on his cell phone while avoiding the pot hole and when walking next to the train.


He ouldn't do two things at once, like talk on a cell phone and avoid a pothole, or talk on a cell phone and pay attention to your surrounds.

Sort of a one-track mind, if you know what I mean.
 
2014-04-20 05:25:57 PM  
Dang, That was 'couldn't'. It was the keyboard, I swear

no cell phones were damaged in typing this
 
2014-04-20 05:30:02 PM  

Mikeyworld: Dang, That was 'couldn't'. It was the keyboard, I swear

no cell phones were damaged in typing this


If you paid more attention to your surrounds, you ould avoid typos like that.
 
2014-04-20 05:30:51 PM  
Darwin seen shaking his fist in rage.
 
2014-04-20 05:33:51 PM  
The guy would have to be blind to not see the lights from the train and deaf to not hear it, even if the horn wasn't used.  If these were the case, he couldn't use the cell phone.  The man has to be a complete and total idiot that the world would be better off without.
 
2014-04-20 05:38:54 PM  

PaLarkin: The guy would have to be blind to not see the lights from the train and deaf to not hear it, even if the horn wasn't used.  If these were the case, he couldn't use the cell phone.  The man has to be a complete and total idiot that the world would be better off without.


It's okay, his condition has upgraded to serious, which is good.  Now he'll stop being such a silly nincompoop.
 
2014-04-20 05:41:38 PM  

Rik01: Trains are big, heavy, noisy things. Near crossroads they usually give several warning blasts of their horns. If the engineer sees someone by the tracks along the line, he'll usually lay on his horn.

Plus a train makes the ground shake coming and going.

Now, walking alongside the tracks with a cell to your ear does not mean you can't notice a million pound train sneaking up on you. Especially at night, with that million candlepower headlight swinging back and forth.

So, what was this guys excuse?


The often shakes when alcohol is involved.
/or so I'm told.
 
2014-04-20 05:58:35 PM  

Dl_white_power: Rik01: Trains are big, heavy, noisy things. Near crossroads they usually give several warning blasts of their horns. If the engineer sees someone by the tracks along the line, he'll usually lay on his horn.

Plus a train makes the ground shake coming and going.

Now, walking alongside the tracks with a cell to your ear does not mean you can't notice a million pound train sneaking up on you. Especially at night, with that million candlepower headlight swinging back and forth.

So, what was this guys excuse?

The often shakes when alcohol is involved.
/or so I'm told.


The whole thing?
 
2014-04-20 05:59:40 PM  
Maybe he'll parachute out of a plane next...
 
2014-04-20 06:50:26 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

I said "Reach out, take my hand, you'll understand."
Baby, everything is alright, uptight, outta sight. Baby, everything is alright, uptight, outta sight.
 
2014-04-20 06:50:43 PM  
He should fly Malaysian Airlines!
 
2014-04-20 06:51:03 PM  
His eye twitches involuntarily.
 
2014-04-20 06:56:07 PM  

angelwolf65: He should fly Malaysian Airlines!


I was gonna say, we need to crowdsource him a trip to Malaysia to make sure the next crashed plane survives.
 
2014-04-20 06:57:07 PM  

dangelder: His eye twitches involuntarily.


Hehe, okay, you win. Maybe not a whole internet (Keene wins that), but a bit of it. Gopher or Veronica?
 
2014-04-20 07:04:57 PM  
robotmonkeys.net
 
2014-04-20 11:35:40 PM  
Upgraded from dead to serious?  Im not sure.
 
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