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(NYPost)   Don't you hate it when you're vacationing in Puerto Rico and your child tries Jif peanut butter for the first time and likes it more than the organic peanut butter you get at Whole Foods so you lie to him and say you can only get Jif in Puerto Rico?   (nypost.com ) divider line
    More: Silly, Jif, whole foods, Puerto Rico, dietary habits, helicopter parenting, Julie Gunlock  
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12076 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Apr 2014 at 9:31 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-04-20 10:23:48 AM  
5 votes:

zarker: I read something about some woman's neighbor calling cps because she was poisoning her child. They took him from her no questions asked and returned him when nothing was wrong. Cps /then/ asked the neighbor why she would say such a thing, and she replied with "They feed him meat!"

We live in a world where it's preferable to feed children lies than perfectly safe food.


Well how can the child eat his pudding then?
2014-04-20 09:43:34 AM  
5 votes:

js34603: That's because Jif has a bunch of sugar in it.

But hey here's so more amazing news...kids like soda better than water. Guess we better let them drink soda and not tell them they can't have it. Or just realize kids are morons and don't know what's good for them, that's what makes them kids.


I'm sorry, you can only get this strangely delicious "soda pop" in Puerto Rico. Now drink your free-range organic broccoli juice.
2014-04-20 09:41:17 AM  
5 votes:
A mom in Washington tells me that she was unable to participate in a number of nanny-share agreements she looked into because the other parents were so crazy about not having their children come into contact with anything non-organic. One mother she met was convinced her child's ADD became worse when he was exposed to non-organic food. A stray Goldfish or Cheerio might set up off.

It's like turning your child into a time bomb that's set to go off in college.
2014-04-20 09:50:53 AM  
4 votes:
Do men do any of this crap? Or are they just cowed into submission to the line by the mad harpies they foolishly married and shot seed into?
2014-04-20 09:38:01 AM  
4 votes:
Terrible parenting. One, because this "organic" foods thing is nothing but a way to get people to pay out the ass for the same stuff basically. And two, why lie? Just tell him: "sorry son, we are stuck up pompous arrogant people who are better then everyone else because we eat organic everything. I know jif tasted awesome but since its not organic you can neve ever ever eat it again."
Skr
2014-04-20 09:34:16 AM  
4 votes:
Which brand would George Washington Carver prefer?
2014-04-20 08:42:52 AM  
4 votes:
I thought the headline would end with some sort of "and he turned out to have peanut allergies and you can't even find a doctor in those 3rd world countries."
2014-04-20 11:36:58 AM  
3 votes:

umad: I only eat organic. I don't know how any of you can stand to eat food that isn't carbon-based.


Are you kidding? Silicon and methane-based macaroons are delish!
2014-04-20 11:35:02 AM  
3 votes:
I only eat organic. I don't know how any of you can stand to eat food that isn't carbon-based.
2014-04-20 10:01:21 AM  
3 votes:
stupid article is stupid. Also, I fully include the NY Post as being a founding member of "the Culture of Alarmism" so to hear them complain about it is priceless.
2014-04-20 09:58:45 AM  
3 votes:
Because they didn't want him having ice cream, some overly health conscious friends of mine told their son that the ice cream truck was just "the music truck that drives around and plays music in neighborhoods with kids".

It is the saddest thing I have ever heard to this day. The Rwandan Genocide has nothing on this story.
2014-04-20 07:24:18 AM  
3 votes:
i.imgur.com
2014-04-20 07:11:40 PM  
2 votes:
Great Porn Dragon:poop actually getting into the water supply and being taken up by the plants (

That was a really cool read until I got to that line. Poop in water gets inside plants. You got a link that explains that? I've eaten a lot of plants. Since I don't recall ever eating poops, I'd imagine that I'd probably notice the taste difference. oh! Wait! Poops is everywhere! Maybe all plants have the taste of poop.

But the water comes from forests. It drains from everywhere. There are many kinds of poops in the forest. Does this mean that all plants have MANY DIFFERENT kinds of poop inside them? Does, for example, bear poop inside a plant make it taste of bear vs. cow? You have opened my eyes to a world of poop infused vegetables that II did not know even existed.

funnyasduck.net
2014-04-20 02:42:41 PM  
2 votes:

happydude45: megarian: perigee: Do men do any of this crap? Or are they just cowed into submission to the line by the mad harpies they foolishly married and shot seed into?

It's so upsetting that men are forced to marry and shoot seed into these harpies.


Yes. Men do this, too. And it's just as obnoxious.

That's why, male or female, one consciously avoids pretentious a'holes, and damn sure doesn't marry one.


Exaaaaaaaaactly.

But, you know, stupid wimmin forcing marriage and babbys cause b*tches be crazy WHY WON'T ANY OF THESE STUPID C*NTS DATE ME I'M SO NICE?!?
2014-04-20 01:38:30 PM  
2 votes:

Dirty J1: Fano: Dirty J1: js34603: That's because Jif has a bunch of sugar in it.

But hey here's so more amazing news...kids like soda better than water. Guess we better let them drink soda and not tell them they can't have it. Or just realize kids are morons and don't know what's good for them, that's what makes them kids.

I agree, but why lie to a kid? Dont parents have the balls to tell kids the truth these days? Instead of "oh sorry, they only make it in Puerto Rico," you could simply say "because jif is bad for you."

They're afraid that if they ever say "No" their kids will hate them.

Bah.... It's a shame kids don't hear words like "no" or "you're a loser" until they are grown up. Then it becomes a huge shock.



Which is why I drive around grade schools with a megaphone shouting "NO! YOU ARE A LOSER!" at the top of my lungs.

Well, actually, I just do that for fun, but it's good to know it has a positive effect on society.
2014-04-20 01:06:02 PM  
2 votes:

vernonFL: I try to buy organic and healthy food when I can. If not, its not the end of the world.


Get this reasonable attitude out of here!   The only possible worlds to live in are the ones where all food is organic or it is not!  No one is allowed to have mild preferences! THERE CAN ONLY BE ORTHODOXY!
2014-04-20 10:06:52 AM  
2 votes:

Jean Claude Van Darn: Because they didn't want him having ice cream, some overly health conscious friends of mine told their son that the ice cream truck was just "the music truck that drives around and plays music in neighborhoods with kids".

It is the saddest thing I have ever heard to this day. The Rwandan Genocide has nothing on this story.


A friend of mine told his kids that the ice cream truck only plays music when it has run out of ice cream.
2014-04-20 10:01:55 AM  
2 votes:
The conversation did not have the happening and was the made up thing for the story of this.
2014-04-20 09:53:15 AM  
2 votes:
Choosy mothers farking choose Jif.
2014-04-20 08:30:39 AM  
2 votes:
The best part about jiff is that they remove all the peanut oil and sell that separately. They do replace it with much cheaper corn oil.
2014-04-20 03:10:12 AM  
2 votes:
Going out on a limb to say it was the sugar that tipped it in
2014-04-20 10:20:39 PM  
1 vote:

ThighsofGlory: Weatherkiss: ThighsofGlory: Unless you lie to them when they're children. No one wants to be friends with a liar.

Many politicians would disagree with you.

They're lying.


ic.pics.livejournal.com
2014-04-20 02:13:41 PM  
1 vote:

PanicMan: Fun fact: kids don't have income or transportation and have to eat whatever you tell them to.  If you tell them "no", they have to live with it.


That's no way to make friends.
2014-04-20 01:07:08 PM  
1 vote:
Choosy moms choose to lie their asses off to their kids and pay six bucks for a bottle of peanut butter.
2014-04-20 12:46:24 PM  
1 vote:

imfallen_angel: adding peanut butter to the list of things on Fark where there's a bunch of snobs/hipsters ranting about it.

Is anything safe?


No. Food is serious bi'ness.
PB must be crunchy dammit.
2014-04-20 12:31:02 PM  
1 vote:

buckler: umad: I only eat organic. I don't know how any of you can stand to eat food that isn't carbon-based.

Are you kidding? Silicon and methane-based macaroons are delish!


www.smbc-comics.com
2014-04-20 12:09:10 PM  
1 vote:
Liberals lying in order to force a behavior. Rick Romero reporting.
2014-04-20 11:50:58 AM  
1 vote:

umad: I only eat organic. I don't know how any of you can stand to eat food that isn't carbon-based.


But... I like Quarry because it's crunchy.
2014-04-20 11:46:33 AM  
1 vote:

LazyMedia: svanmeter: Paradigm crusher: "Nor are organic foods healthier. As Scientific America notes, 50 years of studies in the UK found that organic and conventional foods have the exact same nutritional content."

/interesting

This is such a dumb point. Of course they have the same nutritional content. Nobody's saying organic food has more calories, minerals and vitamins. It's just not covered in pesticides or full of antibiotics and preservatives, and it's fresher and tastes better. The big difference is the NON-nutritional content you get with non-organic food.

/Organic milk in a paper carton is freaky; it lasts for months. I save money on buying the more "expensive" organic, because I don't drink that much milk and it doesn't spoil.
//Same thing goes for organic bananas. I think the chemically treated stuff kills off the good bugs, so that when the bad bugs make a comeback, they do it in a real hurry.
///I don't really care if organic is healthier; it just tastes better because it hasn't been dosed with preservatives and stored for a long time.


There seem to be contradictory claims that you are making.

Organic food doesn't have preservatives.....but it lasts longer?
2014-04-20 11:08:58 AM  
1 vote:
I just buy a bunch of these and eat the chocolate part away first.

img.auctiva.com
2014-04-20 11:03:57 AM  
1 vote:

hasty ambush: FTFA: One mother she met was convinced her child's ADD became worse when he was exposed to non-organic food. A stray Goldfish or Cheerio might set up off.

I am going to guess this coont's poor kid (probably a boy) does not even really have ADD but she  had to have her kid doped up to be part of the crowd.


One of my favorite things is when a c*nt call someone a c*nt.
2014-04-20 11:03:37 AM  
1 vote:

Flint Ironstag: Jean Claude Van Darn: Because they didn't want him having ice cream, some overly health conscious friends of mine told their son that the ice cream truck was just "the music truck that drives around and plays music in neighborhoods with kids".

It is the saddest thing I have ever heard to this day. The Rwandan Genocide has nothing on this story.

A friend of mine told his kids that the ice cream truck only plays music when it has run out of ice cream.


i2.kym-cdn.com
2014-04-20 10:53:49 AM  
1 vote:

BumpInTheNight: Here is a jif that represents my feelings towards most of those bland liquid cardboard organic spreads:
[s11.postimg.org image 240x228]


Nice jraphics interchange format there.  I'll pronounce GIF with a hard g if I damned well want to.
2014-04-20 10:50:16 AM  
1 vote:
Here is a jif that represents my feelings towards most of those bland liquid cardboard organic spreads:
s11.postimg.org
2014-04-20 10:49:59 AM  
1 vote:
It's these children that later in life go on shooting sprees.
Screaming
The world is a lie, I'm better than the rest of you, all I wanted was some farking Jif!!
2014-04-20 10:47:20 AM  
1 vote:

meow said the dog: See you do the up feeling of me!


Nothing but silly feels and laughters out loud!
2014-04-20 10:46:20 AM  
1 vote:
Fun fact: kids don't have income or transportation and have to eat whatever you tell them to.  If you tell them "no", they have to live with it.
2014-04-20 10:42:40 AM  
1 vote:

theorellior: meow said the dog: Paleo FTW

Hahaha I has a laughter out loud for the cavemen that didn't have TV to see Jif ads how did they know to choose Jif but all is okay becuase they all were of the healthy bodies in eating only ferns and yummy deer and never gluten of the horrible grain plants.


See you do the up feeling of me!
2014-04-20 10:35:11 AM  
1 vote:
adding peanut butter to the list of things on Fark where there's a bunch of snobs/hipsters ranting about it.

Is anything safe?
2014-04-20 10:32:12 AM  
1 vote:

Skr: Which brand would George Washington Carver prefer?


Since he is dead, my guess is none.
2014-04-20 10:31:41 AM  
1 vote:

meow said the dog: Paleo FTW


Hahaha I has a laughter out loud for the cavemen that didn't have TV to see Jif ads how did they know to choose Jif but all is okay becuase they all were of the healthy bodies in eating only ferns and yummy deer and never gluten of the horrible grain plants.
2014-04-20 10:29:33 AM  
1 vote:
Ugh. That sounded c*nty.

Ignore me. It's bloody mary time.
2014-04-20 10:27:03 AM  
1 vote:
Paleo FTW
2014-04-20 10:18:23 AM  
1 vote:
Maybe it's the "lying to kids" part, but something about this article reminded me of this unrelated CSB:
We used to live on Mackinaw Island (Michigan thing) and it's quite the Amish playground. Anyways, me and the boy child (he was about 3 at the time) we're sitting in the park waiting for Mrs Maelstrom0370 to get out of work. I'm sitting next to this Amish woman while boy child chases sea gulls. My mom (boy child's Doodah) had told him they were chickens. All birds were chickens to him at this point. I was laughing and we were talking about him chasing those chickens. He runs off and Amish woman looks over at me questioningly. I explain the chicken thing and she nods and says "Well, he's too young to understand the lie"
2014-04-20 10:12:49 AM  
1 vote:
I wonder how parents who lie like this end up dealing with the fallout later.  I mean, you can only fool kids for so long.  This isn't telling them there is a Santa Claus (because why would kids complain about getting presents) or the Tooth Fairy (hello, free money).

Tell the kid the truth, deal with the crying, and move on.  Or, you can stop being so anal and afraid of something that isn't (reading some of this gave me a serious anti-vax vibe), and let these kids have something that is not perfectly healthy from time to time.
2014-04-20 09:56:11 AM  
1 vote:

jayhawk88: A mom in Washington tells me that she was unable to participate in a number of nanny-share agreements she looked into because the other parents were so crazy about not having their children come into contact with anything non-organic. One mother she met was convinced her child's ADD became worse when he was exposed to non-organic food. A stray Goldfish or Cheerio might set up off.

It's like turning your child into a time bomb that's set to go off in college.


Yup. That kid is going to lose his/her mind once out in the real world, assuming the trust fund doesn't keep them inside a bubble.
2014-04-20 09:48:23 AM  
1 vote:
I make sure my kid eats only those foods infused with sugar and bacon flavors.
2014-04-20 09:40:10 AM  
1 vote:
That's because Jif has a bunch of sugar in it.

But hey here's so more amazing news...kids like soda better than water. Guess we better let them drink soda and not tell them they can't have it. Or just realize kids are morons and don't know what's good for them, that's what makes them kids.
2014-04-20 09:39:15 AM  
1 vote:

enthralledgeishagirl: Going out on a limb to say it was the sugar that tipped it in


Not to mention the trans fats.
2014-04-20 08:57:51 AM  
1 vote:
Who the hell cares?
 
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