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(Gothamist)   A bottle of red.. a bottle of white... it's what the scientists ordered tonight   (gothamist.com ) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Alcohol Scientist  
•       •       •

5210 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Apr 2014 at 4:02 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



21 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-19 01:44:32 PM  
Wtf? "Alcohol expert" is a thing?

I'm going to sue the f*ck out of my career counselor.
 
2014-04-19 01:51:32 PM  

megarian: Wtf? "Alcohol expert" is a thing?

I'm going to sue the f*ck out of my career counselor.


Aren't we all 'alcohol experts'?

Personally, my expertise is in the science of squeezing wine out of boxes.
 
2014-04-19 01:56:16 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: megarian: Wtf? "Alcohol expert" is a thing?

I'm going to sue the f*ck out of my career counselor.

Aren't we all 'alcohol experts'?

Personally, my expertise is in the science of squeezing wine out of boxes.


I think that makes us colleagues or something.
 
2014-04-19 03:26:09 PM  
I know several people who drink a bottle of wine or more a night.

/I call them alchoholics
//especially when their hands shake in the morning
 
2014-04-19 03:27:01 PM  

basemetal: I know several people who drink a bottle of wine or more a night.

/I call them alcoholics
//especially when their hands shake in the morning

Fixed it for myself...........

 
2014-04-19 03:58:51 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: Personally, my expertise is in the science of squeezing wine out of boxes.


Few people know that one the box runs out, you can pull the bag out of the box and squeeze another 1/2 glass out.  My daughter taught me that.  Who says old people can't learn from the youngsters.
 
2014-04-19 04:07:52 PM  
samcoley.com
 
2014-04-19 04:08:22 PM  
Wait, I have to stop after one bottle? This is terrible news, subby.
 
2014-04-19 04:08:38 PM  
I'll just stick to grape juice.
 
2014-04-19 04:12:45 PM  
Ah but drinking too much alcohol can give you a heart attack, ack, ack, ack, ack, ack!!!! You oughta know by now who needs two buck Chuck in a Trader Joe's sack?

/I'm moving out of this thread
 
2014-04-19 04:17:14 PM  

oldernell: AlwaysRightBoy: Personally, my expertise is in the science of squeezing wine out of boxes.

Few people know that one the box runs out, you can pull the bag out of the box and squeeze another 1/2 glass out.  My daughter taught me that.  Who says old people can't learn from the youngsters.


I thought that was pretty obvious, especially if you recycle and you have to take the plastic bag out of the paper box.

Wait until you hear about how you can cut open any cream/lotion-based products and find a quarter of the stuff clinging to the side and bottom of the tube.
 
2014-04-19 04:20:06 PM  

LewDux: [samcoley.com image 619x480]


Neil Diamond frowns upon your shenanigans.
 
2014-04-19 04:37:50 PM  
www.dumpaday.com
 
2014-04-19 05:09:39 PM  

megarian: AlwaysRightBoy: megarian: Wtf? "Alcohol expert" is a thing?

I'm going to sue the f*ck out of my career counselor.

Aren't we all 'alcohol experts'?

Personally, my expertise is in the science of squeezing wine out of boxes.

I think that makes us colleagues or something.


To paraphrase Alan Watts:

"You'd come to work in a white coat, if you thought you could get away with it."
 
2014-04-19 05:56:04 PM  
http://youtu.be/JUz48xw_OiM?t=3m2s

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Doc Poikolainen
Wrote an article stating
That conventional wisdom is wrong
Having a drink or a dozen a day
Doesn't really do harm
Now boozers claim they have license
Thanks to journalists hawking some pseudoscience
We never needed a reason to go and imbibe
But now Doc Poikolainen says drinking will lengthen our lives

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh
 
2014-04-19 05:59:02 PM  
i1.cpcache.com
 
2014-04-19 06:11:58 PM  
Way ahead of you, Dr. Alcohol Expert. And by way ahead, I mean 3 bottles ahead.
 
2014-04-19 08:30:51 PM  
28.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-04-20 12:23:39 AM  
yusssssss!!!!
 
2014-04-20 09:16:11 AM  

Parthenogenetic: http://youtu.be/JUz48xw_OiM?t=3m2s

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Doc Poikolainen
Wrote an article stating
That conventional wisdom is wrong
Having a drink or a dozen a day
Doesn't really do harm
Now boozers claim they have license
Thanks to journalists hawking some pseudoscience
We never needed a reason to go and imbibe
But now Doc Poikolainen says drinking will lengthen our lives

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh


That's beautiful.
 
2014-04-20 06:06:48 PM  

Parthenogenetic: http://youtu.be/JUz48xw_OiM?t=3m2s

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Doc Poikolainen
Wrote an article stating
That conventional wisdom is wrong
Having a drink or a dozen a day
Doesn't really do harm
Now boozers claim they have license
Thanks to journalists hawking some pseudoscience
We never needed a reason to go and imbibe
But now Doc Poikolainen says drinking will lengthen our lives

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Whoa oh, whoa oh
Whoa oh, oh, oh-oh-oh


YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD. 

/love that song
 
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