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(Guardian)   The end is in sight, can Liverpool keep going to secure their 19th league title, can Man City stop choking, will Chelsea still stalk the leaders, can Fulham pull off the great escape? All this and more in your Weekend EPL Thread   (theguardian.com) divider line 537
    More: Cool, Man City, Liverpool, Fulham, Alan Pardew, Daniel Sturridge, Manuel Pellegrini, Jose Mourinho, FA Cup Final  
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290 clicks; posted to Sports » on 21 Apr 2014 at 2:01 PM (26 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-20 12:13:27 PM  
I missed the start of the Everton - Man U game due to fixing a noisy dryer.  Why do things break on the weekends when I have soccer to watch?

/by fixing I mean spending an hour taking apart the machine, finding no problem, putting it together, and the problem has gone away
//Its Magic
 
2014-04-20 12:14:24 PM  

Mr_H: I missed the start of the Everton - Man U game due to fixing a noisy dryer.  Why do things break on the weekends when I have soccer to watch?

/by fixing I mean spending an hour taking apart the machine, finding no problem, putting it together, and the problem has gone away
//Its Magic


Your dryer is a United fan.
 
2014-04-20 12:15:33 PM  
Nani stands over the stationary ball doing stepovers until the defender takes it away from him, also known as "being a complete Nani". Useless lump.
 
2014-04-20 12:16:02 PM  

Princip's Sandwich: Mr_H: I missed the start of the Everton - Man U game due to fixing a noisy dryer.  Why do things break on the weekends when I have soccer to watch?

/by fixing I mean spending an hour taking apart the machine, finding no problem, putting it together, and the problem has gone away
//Its Magic

Your dryer is a United fan.


Maybe that explains why it sucks so much lately...
 
2014-04-20 12:20:59 PM  
Second half hat trick from Rooney to win the game!

...sorry, I was playing FIFA 2013. How's the match going?
 
2014-04-20 12:25:12 PM  
Nothing about this Utd 2nd half performance says "comeback", does it?
 
2014-04-20 12:28:15 PM  

czetie: Nothing about this Utd 2nd half performance says "comeback", does it?


"comeback in a couple years when they have a chance" is what it says
 
2014-04-20 12:29:21 PM  

czetie: Nothing about this Utd 2nd half performance says "comeback", does it?


Nope
 
2014-04-20 12:31:02 PM  

desertgeek: czetie: Nothing about this Utd 2nd half performance says "comeback", does it?

Nope


Agreed.
 
2014-04-20 12:31:06 PM  

czetie: Nothing about this Utd 2nd half performance says "comeback", does it?


Oh it does. Mediocrity's comeback.
 
2014-04-20 12:42:45 PM  
Kagawa is off and Nani is still on. Everything you need to know about Moyes right here.

If they do give him $200M to spend in the summer, the first thing he should buy is a clue.
 
2014-04-20 12:43:48 PM  

czetie: Kagawa is off and Nani is still on. Everything you need to know about Moyes right here.

If they do give him $200M to spend in the summer, the first thing he should buy is a clue.


He should buy Yohan Kebab.
 
2014-04-20 12:45:35 PM  
I firmly believe a covert Liverpool operative was behind Moyes' signing.
 
2014-04-20 12:51:55 PM  
So how is that "throw on all the strikers and hope some magic happens" strategy working out for Moyes? Oh, right.
 
2014-04-20 12:53:06 PM  
Clattenburg has ridiculous stamina.
 
2014-04-20 12:54:42 PM  

czetie: Kagawa is off and Nani is still on. Everything you need to know about Moyes right here.

If they do give him $200M to spend in the summer, the first thing he should buy is a clue.


He'll spend all summer in negotiations with Clue while Clue's agent says he's not planning on moving from his current club. On the last day of the transfer window, negotiations will fall through and he'll pick up Unnecessary-Addition for £31.2 million.

And then he'll bench him.
 
2014-04-20 01:01:44 PM  
Martinez gets the double on United.
 
2014-04-20 01:02:16 PM  
So should we say that Liverpool has taken Man Utd's Champions League spot
 
2014-04-20 01:03:32 PM  

Langston: czetie: Kagawa is off and Nani is still on. Everything you need to know about Moyes right here.

If they do give him $200M to spend in the summer, the first thing he should buy is a clue.

He'll spend all summer in negotiations with Clue while Clue's agent says he's not planning on moving from his current club. On the last day of the transfer window, negotiations will fall through and he'll pick up Unnecessary-Addition for £31.2 million.

And then he'll bench him.


Or consistently play him out of position.

*sigh* I am so ready for this bloody season to be over.
 
2014-04-20 01:04:38 PM  
Evil Kagawa:

Greatest trick devil ever play was convincing world Moyes was good coach.
 
2014-04-20 01:10:55 PM  

czetie: Or consistently play him out of position.


It's funny 'cause it's true. Well, maybe not funny exactly...
 
2014-04-20 01:23:12 PM  
The nagging fear still in the back of my head: that today's comfortable win will make Arsenal overconfident going into the FA C up final.
 
2014-04-20 01:24:26 PM  

Langston: The nagging fear still in the back of my head: that today's comfortable win will make Arsenal overconfident going into the FA C up final.


I doubt Wenger will let them. He knows how much pressure there is to get a trophy.
 
2014-04-20 01:33:12 PM  

Princip's Sandwich: Langston: The nagging fear still in the back of my head: that today's comfortable win will make Arsenal overconfident going into the FA C up final.

I doubt Wenger will let them. He knows how much pressure there is to get a trophy.


At least it'll be after the regular season is over.
 
2014-04-20 04:12:17 PM  
With the Liverpool win, Arsenal and Everton were both mathematically eliminated from title contention. Only 3 teams are still alive and no one has a higher points maximum than Liverpool (89 to MC's 86 and Chelsea's 84).
 
2014-04-20 04:46:26 PM  
OK, as desertgeek mentioned, Liverpool has now qualified for the group stage of the CL.  Any points against Chelsea next week means that Liverpool would have to lose their last two games to finish worse than second.  A win against Chelsea means that Liverpool would need only four points in the last two games to win the PL.

Barring a bizarre collapse and/or Everton blowing out opponents (as in beating Man City 9-0), Chelsea is also in the CL.  Four points will put them in the CL playoffs and five points into the group stages.  Chelsea need to beat Liverpool next week or they had better hope for minor miracles.  They could still finish second if Man City drops points.

Man City is probably out of the CL if they lose the rest of their games--they will face Everton.  With their goal difference, they only would need to get seven points to make the CL and eight points to make the group stages.  If they win out, they could win the PL on goal difference if Liverpool only get six points out of the remaining three games.  Man City will be cheering for Chelsea to win outright next week.

Arsenal and Everton need to win out to even have a prayer of getting an automatic berth in the CL group stage.  Any dropped points by either will likely lose the final CL berth.  This gives the edge to Arsenal because Everton faces Man City.  Arsenal has earned a berth in Europe.  Barring a complete collapse, Everton will also get a berth in Europe.

Tottenham is still mathematically alive for a CL berth.  But they would need Arsenal and Everton to each gain only one or two points in their last three games.  Because of goal difference, Tottenham will need at least seven points to finish ahead of Man United.

Man United will not be in the CL next year.  I'm not quite sure if the seventh place team in the PL still has a chance at Europe.  If so, Man United needs to win out to ensure their place--that's only if Southampton wins out.  If Southampton drops any points, Man United is assured seventh place.

Southampton needs to win out and have Man United drop points to gain seventh place.
 
2014-04-20 04:55:23 PM  

Lord Jubjub: Tottenham is still mathematically alive for a CL berth.  But they would need Arsenal and Everton to each gain only one or two points in their last three games.  Because of goal difference, Tottenham will need at least seven points to finish ahead of Man United.

Man United will not be in the CL next year.  I'm not quite sure if the seventh place team in the PL still has a chance at Europe.  If so, Man United needs to win out to ensure their place--that's only if Southampton wins out.  If Southampton drops any points, Man United is assured seventh place.

Southampton needs to win out and have Man United drop points to gain seventh place.


Europa is still possible for MUFC thanks to Man City's League Cup win. Since City is likely going to the UCL, the Europa League spot reserved for League Cup winners would go to the 6th place team and while MU is 6 points behind Spurs for 6th, they do have a game in hand.  I would not call it likely, but they're not out of it.

Also at this point, 4 teams have nothing to play for since they can't be relegated and can't get a spot in Europe: Southampton, Newcastle, Stoke and Palace
 
2014-04-20 04:57:28 PM  
If Arsenal finish in the top four, Hull qualify for Europe. If Arsenal finish fifth and win the FA Cup, 7th in the PL qualifies for the Europa League.
 
2014-04-21 06:55:15 AM  

Lord Jubjub: Man United will not be in the CL next year. I'm not quite sure if the seventh place team in the PL still has a chance at Europe.


Bizarrely, the seventh place team does have an outside shot this year. Normally the three Eurolol places go to...

1. The FA Cup winners or, if the winners qualify for the CL, then the runners-up
2. The 5th place team
3. The League Cup winners or, if already qualified for Europe (i.e. Man City), the 6th place team.

BUT this year there is the following possibility: if Arsenal win the FA Cup and finish 5th, then Hull does not qualify as runners-up. (That backdoor only applies if the winner qualifies for the CL.) In that scenario,

1. Arsenal qualify as FA Cup winners, go straight to the group stages
2. The 6th place team qualify in place of the 5th, and go to the playoff stage
3. The 7th place team qualify in place of the 6th in place of the League Cup winner (if you follow me), and go to Q3 qualifying in early August.

(Yes, I know that people have been saying that Hull were guaranteed to play in Europe next year, but that was back when Arsenal seemed a certainty for the CL. If Arsenal slip to 5th, everything changes. EL qualification is a hot mess.)

If qualifying for the Europa League is a poisoned chalice, qualifying in the bottom slot is a chalice poisoned with iocaine powder.
 
2014-04-21 09:00:38 AM  
The MIGHTY Oxford United face the often filtered Scoonthorpe today. As Scoonthorpe currently top League Two, it'll be a challenge for Waddock's Yellow & Blue army, and a win would give the MIGHTY ones a chance to return to the play off places.
 
2014-04-21 09:24:31 AM  
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! !
 
2014-04-21 09:26:27 AM  
Reports coming in that David Moyes is going to get the sack, although there is no time frame.
It's on NBC Sports official Twitter account, so I would assume that there is some legitimacy to the claims.
 
2014-04-21 09:29:20 AM  
 
2014-04-21 10:04:29 AM  
English football is going to lose its weekly source of joy. It's a sad moment.
 
2014-04-21 10:06:14 AM  
A few reports coming that Moyes gets his walking papers TODAY. Still unconfirmed.
 
2014-04-21 10:09:50 AM  

ADubs86: A few reports coming that Moyes gets his walking papers TODAY. Still unconfirmed.


Those "You're getting sacked in the morning!" chants are going to be proven right.
 
2014-04-21 10:23:27 AM  

ADubs86: A few reports coming that Moyes gets his walking papers TODAY. Still unconfirmed.


I can't imagine they would fire him before the end of the season, with a Europa League place still to play for.

/No, I did not type that with a straight face.
 
2014-04-21 10:51:59 AM  

ADubs86: A few reports coming that Moyes gets his walking papers TODAY. Still unconfirmed.


They must have somebody already lined up to take the job, and want to give them a transfer window.
 
2014-04-21 10:54:14 AM  
talkingbaws.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-21 11:05:36 AM  
What time is the ManC match today?

LucklessWonder: The MIGHTY Oxford United face the often filtered Scoonthorpe today. As Scoonthorpe currently top League Two, it'll be a challenge for Waddock's Yellow & Blue army, and a win would give the MIGHTY ones a chance to return to the play off places.


Come on MIGHTY
 
2014-04-21 11:44:34 AM  

dietbubba: What time is the ManC match today?


Should be 3.00 PM EDT.


Congratulations to Burnley FC, the Clarets are coming back to the Premier League.
 
2014-04-21 11:52:32 AM  

ADubs86: Congratulations to Burnley FC, the Clarets are coming back to the Premier League.


When I see names like Burnley and Leicester back in the top tier, it feels like First Division of my youth all over again.
 
2014-04-21 12:00:15 PM  

czetie: ADubs86: Congratulations to Burnley FC, the Clarets are coming back to the Premier League.

When I see names like Burnley and Leicester back in the top tier, it feels like First Division of my youth all over again.


If Brighton fark up, we might get a chance to have Ipswitch in the promotion playoffs too. This season has been a bit of a throwback hasn't it?
 
2014-04-21 12:06:54 PM  

ADubs86: dietbubba: What time is the ManC match today?

Should be 3.00 PM EDT.


CORRECTION:

Manchester City v West Bromwich Albion kicks off at 2.00 PM EDT
 
2014-04-21 12:10:52 PM  

ADubs86: czetie: ADubs86: Congratulations to Burnley FC, the Clarets are coming back to the Premier League.

When I see names like Burnley and Leicester back in the top tier, it feels like First Division of my youth all over again.

If Brighton fark up, we might get a chance to have Ipswitch in the promotion playoffs too. This season has been a bit of a throwback hasn't it?


All we'd need is Clough managing a top flight team...
 
2014-04-21 12:11:00 PM  

ADubs86: ADubs86: dietbubba: What time is the ManC match today?

Should be 3.00 PM EDT.

CORRECTION:

Manchester City v West Bromwich Albion kicks off at 2.00 PM EDT


DOUBLE CORRECTION, BECAUSE GOOGLE THINKS I'M IN CHICAGO RIGHT NOW:

Game's at 3.00 PM EDT.
 
2014-04-21 12:22:17 PM  
Suarez shows his toughness by shaking off what looked for a moment like a game-ending injury

/Sarcasm
 
2014-04-21 12:39:41 PM  

ADubs86: ADubs86: ADubs86: dietbubba: What time is the ManC match today?

Should be 3.00 PM EDT.

CORRECTION:

Manchester City v West Bromwich Albion kicks off at 2.00 PM EDT

DOUBLE CORRECTION, BECAUSE GOOGLE THINKS I'M IN CHICAGO RIGHT NOW:

Game's at 3.00 PM EDT.


Which means I get home in time for the end of the match since i only get 1x and maybe 3g service in my office building. I love the NBCSports app but only when I have 4g


/Go  CITY!!


/dont fire Moyes!! This has been the most fun season in ages!
 
2014-04-21 12:45:59 PM  

LucklessWonder: ADubs86: A few reports coming that Moyes gets his walking papers TODAY. Still unconfirmed.

They must have somebody already lined up to take the job, and want to give them a transfer window.


Griggs would be interim manager per reports. Isn't Barca or Real Madrid's manager talked about coming to England?
 
2014-04-21 01:55:57 PM  
Hey Unfreakable, can we get a bump over here?
 
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