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(The Raw Story)   "Answers in Genesis" co-founder is SO tired of people who mock "Young earth " creationists by asking how Noah could have fit a Brontosaurus or a T-Rex on the Ark when the answer is OBVIOUS: He took the baby ones, of course, DUH   (rawstory.com) divider line 201
    More: Amusing, Answers in Genesis, young Earth, Noah's Ark, Carl Kerby, ark, Bradley University, Eric W. Dolan, Bryan Fischer  
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4624 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Apr 2014 at 2:11 PM (23 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



201 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-04-18 12:46:31 PM
"He could grip it by the husk"

" It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut. "
 
2014-04-18 12:48:43 PM
Speaking to Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association on Thursday, Carl Kerby insisted it wasn't infeasible for the giant reptilian creatures to have been on Noah's Ark.

When stupid interviews stupid, all that can come out of it is stupid.
 
2014-04-18 12:51:57 PM
Yet evolution just seems so implausible to them.
 
2014-04-18 01:02:35 PM
Brontosaurus Apatosaurus
 
2014-04-18 01:07:58 PM
static.flickr.com

This shiat is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S
 
2014-04-18 01:10:20 PM

phaseolus: Brontosaurus Apatosaurus


In MY world Pluto is still a Planet and Bronto Burgers still come from Brontosauruses
 
MBK [TotalFark]
2014-04-18 01:39:35 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: [static.flickr.com image 478x404]

This shiat is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S


The funniest thing about the bananas argument is that wild bananas are not really the same as the bananas we find in the supermarket.

We evolved the bananas into edible hand held treats.
 
2014-04-18 01:42:33 PM
The Brontosaurus is a lie.
 
2014-04-18 01:45:04 PM
I was told that making fun of disabled people is bad form.

This guy is so dumb that I'm not sure I can resist. Worse yet, he's attracted a bunch of other mentally deranged clowns disabled people to follow him like he knows what he's talking about. That's kind of sad.
 
2014-04-18 01:53:34 PM

MBK: Sin_City_Superhero: [static.flickr.com image 478x404]

This shiat is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S

The funniest thing about the bananas argument is that wild bananas are not really the same as the bananas we find in the supermarket.

We evolved the bananas into edible hand held treats.


Wanna know something else crazy I only recently learned?

What you and I eat and think of as "a banana" tastes totally different from what people in the up  until the 1960's ate.  They ate something called a "Gros Michele" banana that is basically a completely different fruit than the Cavendish we eat.   One of the reasons artificial "banana" flavoring tastes nothing like the fruit is because the flavoring was developed in the 30's to taste like THAT banana, which was wiped out by a fungus in the 1960's, something that is happening right now to  Cavendish banana's we eat now (but won;t be eating in probably less than a decade or so)
 
2014-04-18 02:02:55 PM
Genesis allowed is not!
 
2014-04-18 02:13:08 PM
It's just a shame that's all.
 
2014-04-18 02:15:05 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Genesis allowed is not!


Well, at least pre 1980 Genesis should be allowed!  After that, no, it should not be allowed.
 
2014-04-18 02:15:29 PM
Answers on Genesis co-founder prefers Phil Collins to Peter Gabriel.
 
2014-04-18 02:16:00 PM
Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2014-04-18 02:16:08 PM

Magorn: "He could grip it by the husk"

" It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut. "


It was a baby coconut.
 
2014-04-18 02:17:11 PM

LucklessWonder: Answers on Genesis co-founder prefers Phil Collins to Peter Gabriel.


Came for this. Thank you.

/leaving satisfied.
 
2014-04-18 02:17:22 PM

Magorn: MBK: Sin_City_Superhero: [static.flickr.com image 478x404]

Cavendish banana's we eat now (but won;t be eating in probably less than a decade or so)


That fungus can have my Cavendish bananas when it pries them from my cold, dead hands.  Which will be hard to do, since they were clearly intelligently designed to fit it my hand so nicely.
 
2014-04-18 02:17:32 PM

dr_blasto: I was told that making fun of disabled people is bad form.

This guy is so dumb that I'm not sure I can resist. Worse yet, he's attracted a bunch of other mentally deranged clowns disabled people to follow him like he knows what he's talking about. That's kind of sad.


Potatoe Piper?
 
2014-04-18 02:18:21 PM

Flappyhead: Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"


Manna...? I'm pretty sure it was manna.
 
2014-04-18 02:19:21 PM
He couldn't, he didn't and that's why there aren't any around any more!

/It's sad when you don't agree with someone & can still argue their side better than they farking can.
 
2014-04-18 02:19:26 PM
Noah didn't take any dinosaurs on the ark. That's why they went extinct in the flood, duh.

These guys should science better. Like I.
 
2014-04-18 02:19:31 PM

MBK: Sin_City_Superhero: [static.flickr.com image 478x404]

This shiat is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S

The funniest thing about the bananas argument is that wild bananas are not really the same as the bananas we find in the supermarket.

We evolved the bananas into edible hand held treats.


Not only that, but IIRC that guy is arguing they're the perfect fruit because they easily peel and that gives you a sort of wrapper to hold onto it while you can take nice bite-sized nibbles at it or something.

Bananas spoil way too fast and if you've ever tried to peel an overly ripe banana without a knife to start it, you'd know you wind up with half of it smushed into a nasty mush.
 
2014-04-18 02:20:12 PM
Stop ignoring science by insisting on biblical literalism, and we'll stop mocking you.

But seriously, how the hell did they get all the New World Monkeys on the ark, let alone get them back to South America?
 
2014-04-18 02:21:13 PM
Reminds me of the Polish space agencies plan to send astronauts to the surface of the sun, when asked how they would avoid being burned to cinders they stated the astronauts would be going at night.
 
2014-04-18 02:21:16 PM

SquiggsIN: Has any farker ever tried to have a rational conversation with someone pushing the laminin idiocy on them?

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/aid/v3/n1/laminin-and-the-c ro ss


That's a new one...
 
2014-04-18 02:21:53 PM

Flappyhead: Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"


Obviously the baby dinosaurs.  Tasty, tasty baby dinosaurs.
 
2014-04-18 02:21:57 PM

Magorn: Wanna know something else crazy I only recently learned?

What you and I eat and think of as "a banana" tastes totally different from what people in the up  until the 1960's ate.


Apropos of fruit domestication: Why Your Supermarket Sells Only 5 Kinds of Apples
 
2014-04-18 02:22:06 PM
1) What did they eat and where was the food stored?

2) How do you keep the carnivores from eating their prey?
3) How were animals that died en route replaced?
4) Where were freshwater/seawater (delete where appropriate) fish kept?


5) What to do with all the poo?
 
2014-04-18 02:22:22 PM

Flappyhead: Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"


why would they have to eat anything or even have the inside space of the ark be bound to the laws of physics? it could be bigger inside like the tardis, I mean come on, they had god magic on their side, that trumps all.
 
2014-04-18 02:25:19 PM

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: He couldn't, he didn't and that's why there aren't any around any more!

/It's sad when you don't agree with someone & can still argue their side better than they farking can.


That would be logical, but would also contradict the idea that Noah fit two of every animal on the ark. Remember, it was two of every animal, not two of some animals and a mass extinction of the rest.

/Yes, I know the actual number isn't two. Whatever.
 
2014-04-18 02:26:47 PM

meat0918: SquiggsIN: Has any farker ever tried to have a rational conversation with someone pushing the laminin idiocy on them?

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/aid/v3/n1/laminin-and-the-c ro ss

That's a new one...



Interesting that even the intellectual heavyweights of AIG are themselves calling it a bad argument.
 
2014-04-18 02:27:00 PM

clancifer: Yet evolution just seems so implausible to them.


In a better world, these people would be in hospitals where they could get the psychiatric help they obviously need. Thanks, 0bama!
 
2014-04-18 02:28:23 PM

SquiggsIN: Has any farker ever tried to have a rational conversation with someone pushing the laminin idiocy on them?

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/aid/v3/n1/laminin-and-the-c ro ss


"Only if we start with the Bible as our ultimate standard can we have a worldview that is rational and makes sense of the evidence"

Make the evidence fit the Bible. Whoomp, there it is.
 
2014-04-18 02:29:15 PM

gfid: MBK: Bananas spoil way too fast and if you've ever tried to peel an overly ripe banana without a knife to start it, you'd know you wind up with half of it smushed into a nasty mush.


Try peeling from the other end, no mush, no fuss, way easier.
 
2014-04-18 02:30:11 PM

meat0918: Stop ignoring science by insisting on biblical literalism, and we'll stop mocking you.

But seriously, how the hell did they get all the New World Monkeys on the ark, let alone get them back to South America?


Or the marsupials back to Australia?

Also, wasn't 2 each of every 'unclean' animal and 7 each of every 'clean' animal. So my question is; was T-Rex a clean or unclean animal?
 
2014-04-18 02:30:32 PM
Personally if you ask me I think the flood was a localized event and wasn't a global phoenomena. Back in the day when Noah was around the 'world' to them mean the known world ... so give or take maybe a few thousand square miles at the most!

It's possible if the large mammals that existed within the physical range of his village etc were able to fit into the ark. There weren't a lot of indigenous species of animals in that part of the world. If I recall, the wheel hasn't even been invented yet so most likely the folks back then had no idea what's out there than what their eyes could see on the horizon.
 
2014-04-18 02:30:59 PM

MBK: Sin_City_Superhero: [static.flickr.com image 478x404]

This shiat is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S

The funniest thing about the bananas argument is that wild bananas are not really the same as the bananas we find in the supermarket.

We evolved the bananas into edible hand held treats.


I thought the funniest thing was, that if the banana is the only fruit that's convenient for humans to eat, then every other fruit must be an argument against Creationist ID.

Also, bananas don't grow locally. Not very convenient for good white Christians after all.
 
2014-04-18 02:30:59 PM

SquiggsIN: Has any farker ever tried to have a rational conversation with someone pushing the laminin idiocy on them?

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/aid/v3/n1/laminin-and-the-c ro ss


No. You cannot reason someone out of a position they did reason themselves into.
 
2014-04-18 02:31:02 PM

meat0918: Stop ignoring science by insisting on biblical literalism, and we'll stop mocking you.

But seriously, how the hell did they get all the New World Monkeys on the ark, let alone get them back to South America?


A minimum of 600,000 species of insect, probably more like 950,000. And since the earth was submerged under saltwater for more than 10 months, you'd really want to have kept specimens of all the land plants, too.

Aside from a food supply problem, have you even looked in the bottom of that ark? Who's going to clean that mess down there?
 
2014-04-18 02:31:46 PM

Flappyhead: Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"


To add to that, what did they eat after the flood?  Clearly that would've killed off all plant life as well as animal life, so the only thing left is the 2 of every animal and Noah's crew.  Whoever "created" this story didn't think it all the way through.
 
2014-04-18 02:33:43 PM

TofuTheAlmighty: Magorn: Wanna know something else crazy I only recently learned?

What you and I eat and think of as "a banana" tastes totally different from what people in the up  until the 1960's ate.

Apropos of fruit domestication: Why Your Supermarket Sells Only 5 Kinds of Apples


I'm beating the man at that game; I planted four different heritage apple saplings in my back yard two years ago. The first one bloomed this year, a Cox's Orange pippin. I don't plan to eat the apples, though; gonna make hard cider.
 
2014-04-18 02:36:28 PM

Flappyhead: Usually I allow YEC morans to get passed the "two of every kind" bit so I can watch their ears smoke with this simple question.  "What did they eat?"


The fund would smile smugly and cite Genesis 6:21 which seems to indicate that  God pulled some kind of "loaves and Fishes eal" and/or magically turned all the animals into herbivores for the trip

however if you want a harder question to ask someone who is a biblical literalist (who therefore beieves that every word in the bible is literally true and there are no errors in the text)  ask them to square  Gen 6:19 with Gen 7:2
 Gen 6:19-20
And of every living thing of all flesh, you shall bring two of every kind into the ark, to keep them alive with you; they shall be male and female. Of the birds after their kind, and of the animals after their kind, of every creeping thing of the ground after its kind, two of every kind will come to you to keep them alive.Gen 7:2:Then the LORD said to Noah, "Enter the ark, you and all your household, for you alone I have seen to be righteous before Me in this time. "You shall take with you of every clean animal by sevens, a male and his female; and of the animals that are not clean two, a male and his female; also of the birds of the sky, by sevens, male and female, to keep offspring alive on the face of all the earth.and these passages are literally 5 verse apart.not to mention the whole clean/unclean distinction didn't exist until God gave the dietary laws to Moses in Leviticus
 
2014-04-18 02:39:07 PM

Duane Dibbley: 5) What to do with all the poo?


Tip it over the side and call it Ankh-Morpork.

ZMugg: Also, wasn't 2 each of every 'unclean' animal and 7 each of every 'clean' animal. So my question is; was T-Rex a clean or unclean animal?


7?  That's a useful number.  3 breeding pairs and a third wheel.

I mean, if the extra is a female, then one of the males can knock up two, but how do you know if you've got a male or female mosquito?

/I'm not going back for another one, you change one of them
 
2014-04-18 02:39:31 PM
Oh.  Ow.  Ow ow ow ow.

My brain hurts now!
 
2014-04-18 02:41:52 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Genesis allowed is not!


Is planet forbidden!
 
2014-04-18 02:42:26 PM

ZMugg: meat0918: Stop ignoring science by insisting on biblical literalism, and we'll stop mocking you.

But seriously, how the hell did they get all the New World Monkeys on the ark, let alone get them back to South America?

Or the marsupials back to Australia?

Also, wasn't 2 each of every 'unclean' animal and 7 each of every 'clean' animal. So my question is; was T-Rex a clean or unclean animal?


Well, both lizards and birds of prey (including vultures) are tref, so I'm pretty sure T Rex is unclean. So you'd need only two. But there are a LOT of big predator dinosaur species; you'd need like a whole deck section just for all the tyrannosaurids, and that doesn't even include allosaurs and spinosaurs.
 
2014-04-18 02:42:49 PM
This is why Cosmos makes an effort to show how Christian literalism is.  Gotta fight the stupid, or else it wins.
 
2014-04-18 02:42:50 PM
http://www.unmuseum.org/dinobront.htm

Subby, read that. As phaseolus has kindly pointed out brontosaurus is a misnomer.

I recommend a trip to the http://www.tyrrellmuseum.com/  it is the raddest museum ever, log off and go there now!

/will always do the shameless plug for the Tyrrell
 
2014-04-18 02:42:54 PM

Magorn: however if you want a harder question to ask someone who is a biblical literalist (who therefore beieves that every word in the bible is literally true and there are no errors in the text) ask them to square Gen 6:19 with Gen 7:2
Gen 6:19-20
And of every living thing of all flesh, you shall bring two of every kind into the ark, to keep them alive with you; they shall be male and female. Of the birds after their kind, and of the animals after their kind, of every creeping thing of the ground after its kind, two of every kind will come to you to keep them alive.Gen 7:2:Then the LORD said to Noah, "Enter the ark, you and all your household, for you alone I have seen to be righteous before Me in this time. "You shall take with you of every clean animal by sevens, a male and his female; and of the animals that are not clean two, a male and his female; also of the birds of the sky, by sevens, male and female, to keep offspring alive on the face of all the earth.and these passages are literally 5 verse apart.not to mention the whole clean/unclean distinction didn't exist until God gave the dietary laws to Moses in Leviticus


That's not even consistent within the one verse.  I read the first bit as seven pairs, ie, seven sets consisting of a male and a female, but the second one as two individuals, a male and female.

People base their entire life on this book?  How do they keep their heads from exploding?

/what's a cubit?
 
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