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(Jezebel)   Nebraska elementary school gives fifth graders nine rules for how to deal with bullies, such as "Treat the bully like they're trying to help you" and "never, ever tell on them"   (jezebel.com) divider line 166
    More: Stupid, treating, elementary schools, graders, sore loser  
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6324 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Apr 2014 at 1:10 PM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-17 07:29:06 PM

if_i_really_have_to: It's fascinating how almost every single man (obviously) in this thread equates "bullying" to "physical violence".  In this day and age, it is rarely physical violence even amongst boys, so there's no fight to win.  So quit it with your outdated fantasies of sexual gratification via violence.

I have had a couple of relatives recently mercilessly bullied over a couple of years at school.  One of them is okay, but it caused the other one to develop a severe anxiety disorder (to the point of hallucinations, that's how severe).  Never once was there any physical violence.


Had there been physical violence, ie beating the snot out of the offenders, then the other bullying aspects would have likely stopped. That's what you do with bad people - utilize force to coerce them to stop. It's why we used tanks and bombers against Hitler rather than flowers and psychobabble.

The PROBLEM in modern times isn't that mindset, it's people who want to punish others for that mindset. When someone is abused, and acts to stop that abuse, they themselves are generally the ones punished by the system.

The system is broken. It prevents solving problems, or taking personal responsibility. In fact, I would argue that the system is more to blame for our problems than many of the individuals acting out within that system (ie the bullies in question).

As for your ignorant and offensive 'sexual gratification' bs, shove it up any available orifice of your body. Yours is PRECISELY the kind of post-modernist bullying that invites physical violence, and I for one would be quite happy to slap some god damned sense into you.
 
2014-04-17 07:32:54 PM
BTW, blocked the sexist post-modernist female dog (obviously, right?) before she gets me REALLY angry.
 
2014-04-17 07:39:34 PM
What_do_you_want_now: I see something terrifying in my dad's eyes. I think he went feral for just a brief moment


I have always been the most laid back person, and only really stood up for myself in serious shiat storm situations. You could say and do gnarly shiat to me, and I will never flinch.

That being said as a parent now I can't tell you the beast that overcomes me when I imagine someone farking with my kids. "Mama Bear" is an endearing term for it. Luckily they are little enough they haven't seen the shiatty place the world can be. It's one thing for my kid to get a toy stolen and have to stick up for himself. It's another thing for other adults to act that way towards a child. This makes me angry that you went through that, but happy with how it turned out.

I am glad you had that experience. It makes you trust your parents more, I think. Good on your dad.
 
2014-04-17 08:14:54 PM
I can't begin to fathom the emotional issues the person who created that list must have.

I was constantly bullied growing up, to the point of feeling suicidal because it was so overwhelming. I'm still socially awkward, out of touch with fashion trends, interested in things that may or may not be weird. I've accepted that I'm just who I am and it's way too damn much work to try to be any other way.

I now have school-aged children who are occasionally bullied. I tell them they need to examine why they are being bullied and see if there is validity to what is being said. Are you being called stinky? You may choose to bathe more often. Son being called a sissy girl for painting his nails? Tell them you aren't interested in their fashion advice.

There will always be someone who doesn't like something about you. Embrace that which makes you different because those are the things you'll come to be celebrated for by everyone who is worth listening to.  want them to have a strong/loud enough inner voice that they all the assholes in the world are just background noise.
 
2014-04-17 09:13:12 PM
In the early 2000's I listened to a lot of "conspiracy AM radio" at work (not really by my choice -but it can be entertaining).  One of the frequent conspiracies proffered was that bullying is systemically tolerated by design to indoctrinate children into accepting government control -ie police, ATF, eminent domain, etc*.

It's eery how many of the "conspiracies" gain legitimacy over time.  It's almost prophetic.

*those were the big issues at the time
 
2014-04-17 09:14:58 PM

theprinceofwands: BTW, blocked the sexist post-modernist female dog (obviously, right?) before she gets me REALLY angry.


If opinions like hers make you that angry, you might want to throw me on ignore as well.  Honestly, Fark might not be the right place for you if it's that easy to get you to throw a temper tantrum.  Quite a lot of people here are what you would call "sexist post-modernist female dogs"  to one degree or another, and you seem rather ill-equipped to handle us.
 
2014-04-17 11:29:38 PM
How long until one of those fifth graders comes to school with a firearm?
 
2014-04-17 11:31:18 PM

Marcus Aurelius: Nebraska makes Iowa look like a cosmopolitan paradise.


sad but true
 
2014-04-18 12:19:52 AM
The school board:
www.thefilteredlens.com

www.blastr.com

img2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-04-18 12:21:15 AM
Rule ten:  after playing out the last 9 rules to no avail, get very close to your bully and when close enough,  rapidly, and with as much force as you can muster, apply the top center of your forehead directly to the bridge of your bullies nose, at this point step back exactly1 pace and, in a kicking motion, try and lift your bully off the ground with your right foot carefully placed directly in between both his legs. At this point,If your bully is still standing, utilize the fact you are only half his size and start running in any direction that offers an opportunity to out run this unhappy sod. Keep running as necessary.
 
2014-04-18 01:37:23 AM

ciberido: theprinceofwands: BTW, blocked the sexist post-modernist female dog (obviously, right?) before she gets me REALLY angry.

If opinions like hers make you that angry, you might want to throw me on ignore as well.  Honestly, Fark might not be the right place for you if it's that easy to get you to throw a temper tantrum.  Quite a lot of people here are what you would call "sexist post-modernist female dogs"  to one degree or another, and you seem rather ill-equipped to handle us.


I'm fine with anything anyone wants to be...I'm less fine when they make sexist, abusive, offensive comments directed at those that fit in their narrow, butthurt bias, without other impetus.
 
2014-04-18 06:26:23 AM

What_do_you_want_now: Fight back, bullies hate kids with spines


My dad was kinda like yours - so I only called him in once
he kinda farked it up but it worked anyway

I think it is not best to directly engage bullies, ostracise them (build a group)

I was a good fighter (martial arts training etc...) but a total nerd and military brat (school to school to school)
I would befriend the kids that were bullied, safety in numbers.

Bullies are cowards - they hunt the weak they will not take on a group.
Friends and groups of friends have this reward and MANY other rewards
 
2014-04-18 08:22:08 AM
I was practically raised according to those rules. Still have problems blaming myself whenever anyone decides to bully me.

/which in turn means nobody will ever have my back for anything less than outright physical violence
//because my self-doubt is interpreted as being guilty of something, and therefore deserving of the bullying
 
2014-04-18 09:15:36 AM
The wailing, flailing knee-jerk responses to this advice only serve to show how accurate it is
 
2014-04-18 06:08:34 PM

Aigoo: HotWingConspiracy: Day 1 of school: Find the biggest kid and break his nose with a paving stone

This actually works, mostly.

I had a girl try to bully me in fifth grade... right up until I turned around and gave her a left hook that knocked her on her ass in front of about 40 people. Next bully, people warned. She didn't stop. I ignored her until she said something about my mother, then I picked her up and threw her into a wall (to be fair, she wasn't very heavy and the wall was only about 6 feet away--and my mother swears I've had a vicious temper since I was about two years old that makes me about ten times stronger when I get pissed, which is why I keep a tight lid on my temper).

I wasn't bullied again until sophomore year. I let that one hit me--from behind--about five times before I turned around and beat her bloody before throwing her through a plate glass window (can't say she wasn't warned--everyone who'd witnessed the other two incidents told her she did not want to fark with me. Even the teacher told her to watch her step). I wouldn't have been suspended at all except I used a racial slur (none of the black kids minded, and a few protested the suspension, saying "that biatch deserved it!") in front of about 2/3 of the school during the fight. The other girl was expelled. My parents took me out to dinner for observing the rule of "you'd better never start a fight, but you'd damn sure better finish it."

So yes, knocking bullies on their ass is a very effective deterrent. Unfortunately, in today's politically correct, zero tolerance (and zero intelligence) society, it's generally frowned upon.


I think I love you.
 
2014-04-18 09:30:40 PM

doubled99: The wailing, flailing knee-jerk responses to this advice only serve to show how accurate it is


Which ones? Fight back? Get a group of friends? Keep that shiat out of the school system?
If you're saying to be a good little victim, identify with the bully, never snitch, never defend yourself, never allow yourself to get angry, then try and have a nice life. Carry lots of Astroglide and practice with cucumbers.
 
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