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(Deadspin)   Video surfaces of Action Park - where fun was a terrifying adventure - and its most infamous ride: the Cannonball Loop   (theconcourse.deadspin.com) divider line 73
    More: Cool, Cannonball Loop, Action Park  
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6880 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Apr 2014 at 1:15 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-17 10:26:52 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org

FZ frowns on these grammar shenanigans
 
2014-04-17 10:57:05 AM  
Ah, Traction Park.  With it's asphalt pathways and zero safety regulations.  I almost crippled myself a few times there.
 
2014-04-17 11:47:28 AM  
It's YouPorn for personal injury attorneys
 
2014-04-17 12:45:51 PM  
Traction Park, land of a thousand jokes.  And injuries, of course.
 
2014-04-17 01:18:02 PM  
Class Action Park was a rite of passage for any Jersey kid growing up in the 80s
 
2014-04-17 01:21:34 PM  
I'm hoping to take my kids this summer and have them spill out on the alpine slide and have to visit the first aid station, just like their old man did when he was a youngin'.
 
2014-04-17 01:23:23 PM  
[notthisshiatagain.jpg] -- is Fark sponsored by this place now, or something?
 
2014-04-17 01:24:50 PM  
An AP thread always surfaces every other year on Fark. And I really enjoy the testimonies of actual park patrons from back in the day.
 
2014-04-17 01:25:59 PM  
Does this place have a contract that states it has to show up here every few months?
 
2014-04-17 01:26:12 PM  
Yaay!  Action Park thread!

\We need Action Park franchises all over the country, so Darwin really start cleaning up the gene pool.
\\no injuries for me
\\\well, except for minor road rash from the alpine slide, and a painful wedgie from that waterslide at the top of the hill...
\\\\nothing serious, though
 
2014-04-17 01:27:11 PM  
I SOOOOOOOO miss Action Park.  Getting drunk in the parking lot & going on super-unsafe rides.  Good times, good times
 
2014-04-17 01:27:17 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-04-17 01:31:50 PM  
They may be re-opening "Action Park", but with the dangerous elements nerfed it just won't be the same.

That's why when I go there I will randomly attack people with a brick covered in sandpaper.
 
2014-04-17 01:38:44 PM  
Ah yes.  Bone Cracktion Park.
 
2014-04-17 01:38:57 PM  
I grew up in westchster in the 80s.  In the summer we would either go to Action park or Six flags.   Action Park was a scary fun place.  The Alpine slde was made to cut the skin off your legs.  The cliff jump was crazy.  I remember goign down the tube ride next to it once, and a rider in frotn of me didnt have enough moementum to go over the hump before teh 2nd water fall.  So as i came over the top of the first, i nailed him with my tube causing me to get stuck andd wait for the next rider to assualt me over the side.

What other park could you go to that had bumper boats??
 
2014-04-17 01:39:28 PM  
Oh, I remember Fracture Park.
 
2014-04-17 01:40:01 PM  
Man do I miss that place.  The best part was comparing injuries with your buddies on the way back to the parking lot at the end of the day.
 
2014-04-17 01:40:19 PM  
Hey, are we talking Missing in Action Park?
 
2014-04-17 01:41:15 PM  
Approves.

d1mxyp5ceukbya.cloudfront.net
 
2014-04-17 01:41:20 PM  
Having read other threads about Action Park here on Fark, this is definitely not a bookmark.
 
2014-04-17 01:41:29 PM  
When I was little, I would go to Michael Jackson Park.
 
2014-04-17 01:43:23 PM  

The Bestest: Class Action Park was a rite of passage for any Jersey kid growing up in the 80s


Pretty much anyone in the Tri-State Area during that era had to survive Action Park.  As a rite of passage, it was every bit as important as Confirmation or a Bar Mitzvah.
 
2014-04-17 01:44:20 PM  
I loved that place. I don't know how I never got seriously injured. I landed wrong on the cliff jump, once. That stung for a long time. I only ever almost lost it on the Alpine slide. I figured out the people maze in ten minutes. I loved the slides made out of metal rollers. You'd get on a plastic thing, zip down like a UPS package on a conveyer and see how long you could skim on the water.
 
2014-04-17 01:48:05 PM  
Love these threads so I'm marking my book here.
 
2014-04-17 01:51:45 PM  

Joe Peanut: Man do I miss that place.  The best part was comparing injuries with your buddies on the way back to the parking lot at the end of the day.


What is it vith all of ze girly men complaining about getting ze little injuries on ze kiddie slides at action Park, Franz?  Believe me now and hear me later, kids don't know what danger vas like.  Try working out for four hours and then wrestling a tiger in his enclosure without putting any Ben Gay on first, yah!  And I'm not talking about lifting your collection of Strawberry Shortcake dolls, girlyman!  You little flabby-men from need to up ze pumpatude like us!  *FLEX!*
 
2014-04-17 01:52:22 PM  
I don't know what everyone is talking about.  I went there a few times as a kid and always came away injury free.

And I loved that luge thing.  Never went off the side once.

Unless, of course I just suppressed all of the horrible memories and went to my happy place...
 
2014-04-17 01:53:46 PM  

poot_rootbeer: They may be re-opening "Action Park", but with the dangerous elements nerfed it just won't be the same.


Apathy Park? LethargyLand?
 
2014-04-17 01:54:32 PM  
I was eighteen and drunk when I went on that thing.  I wrenched my back and almost broke my nose in the loop; I bled so much I looked like a murder victim.  If my friend hadn't been at the bottom to help me up I would have drowned because my back wouldn't let me move to get myself up.

Hi, I'm Mari, I'm from New Jersey and I'm one of the Survivors of Cannonball Loop at Traction ParkTM.
 
2014-04-17 02:00:31 PM  
It's not news, it's Action Park
 
2014-04-17 02:07:20 PM  
Pink Floyd background music?
 
2014-04-17 02:09:20 PM  
I don't think it was Action Park, but I do remember going down some apline slide thing sometime in the late 80's.

It was a concrete bobsled run you did on this little cart with wheels and a lever. The lever connected to a tiny skid pad to give you three speeds: Gradually slow down and hope you make the turn - Go balls out - What in the holy fark are you thinking?. I flew out of a turn and landed in a tire they used for padding. The tire had broken steel belting poking out of it. Some other poor bastard when up the side of a turn and came down on his head knocking himself out. I promptly when up twice more to do it again. I think I was 11 at the time.
 
2014-04-17 02:09:47 PM  
Wow must say I am impressed to actually see that thing in acticon.
 
2014-04-17 02:12:06 PM  
*grabs popcorn*
 
2014-04-17 02:19:36 PM  

MythDragon: I don't think it was Action Park, but I do remember going down some apline slide thing sometime in the late 80's.

It was a concrete bobsled run you did on this little cart with wheels and a lever. The lever connected to a tiny skid pad to give you three speeds: Gradually slow down and hope you make the turn - Go balls out - What in the holy fark are you thinking?. I flew out of a turn and landed in a tire they used for padding. The tire had broken steel belting poking out of it. Some other poor bastard when up the side of a turn and came down on his head knocking himself out. I promptly when up twice more to do it again. I think I was 11 at the time.


I did the one in Utah in 1988 when I was the same age.  I don't remember it being particularly fearsome, but something tells me these things run the gamut from "reasonably well-constructed and managed" to "ZOMG Deth Trap!!1!"
 
2014-04-17 02:22:32 PM  

elev8meL8r: MythDragon: I don't think it was Action Park, but I do remember going down some apline slide thing sometime in the late 80's.

It was a concrete bobsled run you did on this little cart with wheels and a lever. The lever connected to a tiny skid pad to give you three speeds: Gradually slow down and hope you make the turn - Go balls out - What in the holy fark are you thinking?. I flew out of a turn and landed in a tire they used for padding. The tire had broken steel belting poking out of it. Some other poor bastard when up the side of a turn and came down on his head knocking himself out. I promptly when up twice more to do it again. I think I was 11 at the time.

I did the one in Utah in 1988 when I was the same age.  I don't remember it being particularly fearsome, but something tells me these things run the gamut from "reasonably well-constructed and managed" to "ZOMG Deth Trap!!1!"


They had one at Seven Springs Resort, PA. My dad flew off that biatch and burned up his arm pretty bad. Pull back for brake?? Never!!
 
2014-04-17 02:22:49 PM  
Anyone here ever ride the first iteration of the "Predator" at Darien Lake? Still having occasional issues with memory loss?
That thing, along with some of the Barracuda Bay attractions, may have done horrible things to my pre-frontal cortex.

/Funny that I only remembered riding "The Predator" after someone mentioned Michael Jackson...
 
2014-04-17 02:23:03 PM  
When I was growing up, there was a rumor that someone had put razor blades in Cannonball Run (not the loop, the other one that shot you out into a pool).  My friends were brave enough to tempt it but even though they came out unscathed, I still didn't trust it.  That story just freaked me out too much.

My favorite was that giant roller slide where you grabbed a tiny piece of plastic, shot down this thing at like 500mph then skipped across a pool.  The lighter kids could almost make it the whole way across.

/Man do I farking love a good Action Park thread.
//Miss that place.
 
2014-04-17 02:26:44 PM  
Perhaps not quite as lethal as Action Park, but do any Seattle area farkers recall Waterworks park in Issaquah?
That place was great, despite being engineered worse than my first treehouse.
I remember the foam "river bed" on the wild river run ripping open and sucking kids under with the water pressure grating them up against the concrete.
Oh to be a kid in the 80's..,
 
2014-04-17 02:30:27 PM  
Also, "Canada's Wonderland" probably causes more deaths per day than Hitler could have ever imagined.
Feed the starving carnivorous deer with your hands!*

*literally
 
2014-04-17 02:38:30 PM  
heh.. looking at the website, they even revived the old, hyper-80s logo for the re-opening
 
2014-04-17 02:44:45 PM  

Iblis824: What other park could you go to that had bumper boats??



...uuummm, plenty of parks have bumper boats.
 
2014-04-17 02:45:42 PM  

milowitz: An AP thread always surfaces every other year on Fark. And I really enjoy the testimonies of actual park patrons from back in the day.


You've misspelled "week". The last Action Park thread was twelve *days* ago.
 
2014-04-17 02:53:39 PM  

MythDragon: I don't think it was Action Park, but I do remember going down some apline slide thing sometime in the late 80's.

It was a concrete bobsled run you did on this little cart with wheels and a lever. The lever connected to a tiny skid pad to give you three speeds: Gradually slow down and hope you make the turn - Go balls out - What in the holy fark are you thinking?. I flew out of a turn and landed in a tire they used for padding. The tire had broken steel belting poking out of it. Some other poor bastard when up the side of a turn and came down on his head knocking himself out. I promptly when up twice more to do it again. I think I was 11 at the time.


www.liftopia.com
img.youtube.com
njh.images.worldnow.com
www.domainofdeath3.com
 
2014-04-17 02:56:42 PM  

gas giant: Anyone here ever ride the first iteration of the "Predator" at Darien Lake? Still having occasional issues with memory loss?
That thing, along with some of the Barracuda Bay attractions, may have done horrible things to my pre-frontal cortex.

/Funny that I only remembered riding "The Predator" after someone mentioned Michael Jackson...


Is that the wooden one?  yeah I went on it a couple times.  Kinda wondered if the restraint bar was enough, but never really cared about wooden coasters enough to really bother riding it a lot.
 
2014-04-17 02:59:28 PM  
This is way the 80's were awesome.
 
2014-04-17 03:03:44 PM  
I doubt it's the same way now, but back in the mid-80s there was a newly-opened water park in VA area not far from the beach.  It was mid-week and the place was empty.  I remember the lifeguards not caring if you went down the waterslides in an innertube, using a mat, or just by yourself.  The tube was scary, as you're just a couple inches from the top of the rails, and some of the corners were not really equipped to handle a tube on them (not to mention it was about 25' straight down if you fell out).  The best way was to go on the palm of your hands and keep your feet flat down, and keep your butt in the air.  You were gaining speed the whole way down.
 
2014-04-17 03:07:29 PM  

ferretman: MythDragon: I don't think it was Action Park, but I do remember going down some apline slide thing sometime in the late 80's.

It was a concrete bobsled run you did on this little cart with wheels and a lever. The lever connected to a tiny skid pad to give you three speeds: Gradually slow down and hope you make the turn - Go balls out - What in the holy fark are you thinking?. I flew out of a turn and landed in a tire they used for padding. The tire had broken steel belting poking out of it. Some other poor bastard when up the side of a turn and came down on his head knocking himself out. I promptly when up twice more to do it again. I think I was 11 at the time.

[www.liftopia.com image 569x378]
[img.youtube.com image 638x478]
[njh.images.worldnow.com image 629x411]
[www.domainofdeath3.com image 636x362]


I went on the ride in the 3rd picture in one of the double-rafts with a friend of mine.  we hit one of the turns so hard, we almost flipped the raft.  good times.
 
2014-04-17 03:07:58 PM  
The only other place I ever went as a kid that was more dangerous / fun was an amusement park in Mexico City called El Divertido or something like that. It was AWESOME

They had a "ride" that basically was like a 7 story building with holes / shoots that when you jumped through it led to the floor below. Sometimes the holes were stacked and you would fall 2 stories and land on vinyl floors

They also had a "slide jump" that was about 20 feet high. You got in a sack and down the ramp you went. it launched you like 20 feet in to the over a netted airbag. The sponsor kid i was staying at wouldn't go on it as he had broken his arm the year before.

I wonder if that place survived the earth quake etc
 
2014-04-17 03:14:39 PM  

gas giant: Also, "Canada's Wonderland" probably causes more deaths per day than Hitler could have ever imagined.
Feed the starving carnivorous deer with your hands!*

*literally


Really? I've been going there almost every year for 20 years, and I've never heard of someone being seriously injured. I'm sure it occasionally happened, but Canada's Wonderland never had a reputation for unsafe rides.
 
2014-04-17 03:17:33 PM  

Dr Jack Badofsky: Is that the wooden one?  yeah I went on it a couple times.  Kinda wondered if the restraint bar was enough, but never really cared about wooden coasters enough to really bother riding it a lot.


Yup. I'm pretty sure those restraints were meant for monstrous land whales and not skinny little normal sized people, hence all the pelvic bruising that my group experienced.
They completely redesigned it several years after it first opened (late 80's), for obvious reasons.
 
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