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(io9)   These renderings are either the future of urban skyscrapers or proof that architects really, really like designing massive phallic symbols   (io9.com) divider line 45
    More: Interesting, skyscrapers, architects, city planners, artificial islands, Wikimedia Commons, BSB, Caspian Sea  
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3414 clicks; posted to Geek » on 16 Apr 2014 at 11:49 AM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-04-16 10:31:58 AM
We're just a few years away from getting the arcology achievement.
 
2014-04-16 11:28:25 AM
Actually, some of those could breast be described as looking like another part of the body.
 
2014-04-16 12:01:53 PM
I dont know about y'all but i prefer my skyscrapers to be be shorter than any of the other dimensions.
 
2014-04-16 12:11:15 PM
The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.
 
2014-04-16 12:14:02 PM
upload.wikimedia.orgII give you the chicago vagina building.
 
2014-04-16 12:17:10 PM
The Seattle Municipal Building

www.historylink.org
 
2014-04-16 12:37:05 PM
I'm pretty sure by definition, a skyscraper will look somewhat similar to a phallus - especially as the height gets taller; unless you can build a perfectly square skyscraper that is as wide, as it is tall. A 1,000' wide and 1,000' tall cube building would be interesting, but it would leave the people towards the center of the building hundreds of feet away from a window and daylight.

Also, due to aerodynamics and high level winds, as they get taller, they're almost always cylindrical in diameter - so the wind pressure on the windows won't cause the glass to implode - which will make it more phallic in appearance.
 
2014-04-16 12:44:17 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." as Sigmund Freud said, chomping down on a Havana. But then he also fainted when he was assigned the Bridal Suite at a hotel (he had to be carried over the threshold by Karl Jung.) I don't recall off the top of my head but it was either the Bridal Suite where Freud spent his honeymoon with Mrs. Freud or else the Bridal Suite where his Father dittoed Mrs. Freud Senior.

To quote Piet Hein:

Since everything is either
Concave or convex
Not matter what you dream
It'll be something with sex.
 
2014-04-16 12:45:26 PM
Dammit. I said I wanted the fountain on top of the tower, not in front.

Why are all the architects giggling?

Be serious. Why am I showering you with gold?
 
2014-04-16 12:49:35 PM
It thought that Dubai with its tower built to look like stacks of gold coins had this thing down pat, but the Argentinians have topped them with their giant screw.


upload.wikimedia.org


We're in the money, we're in the money, we've got a lot of what it takes to get along!

 
2014-04-16 12:50:11 PM

brantgoose: lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.

"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." as Sigmund Freud said, chomping down on a Havana. But then he also fainted when he was assigned the Bridal Suite at a hotel (he had to be carried over the threshold by Karl Jung.) I don't recall off the top of my head but it was either the Bridal Suite where Freud spent his honeymoon with Mrs. Freud or else the Bridal Suite where his Father dittoed Mrs. Freud Senior.


And I quote from George Carline "Oh yeah? well sometimes it's a big brown dick! An old white pussy sucking on a big brown dick!".
 
2014-04-16 12:52:03 PM
Miapolis? They need to build a smaller version of this in Minnesota and call it Miniapolis.

i.kinja-img.com
 
2014-04-16 12:52:49 PM

brantgoose: It thought that Dubai with its tower built to look like stacks of gold coins had this thing down pat, but the Argentinians have topped them with their giant screw.


[upload.wikimedia.org image 850x1487]
We're in the money, we're in the money, we've got a lot of what it takes to get along!


As an Architect myself, I am baffled at the amount of skyscrapers done in Dubai. Honestly, to me that shiat's wrong.

/Then again
//I'm more along the lines of Japanese Minialism
///See Tadao Ando and Kenzo Tange
////Also Mexican Architects, BAUHAUS, and all that jazz
 
2014-04-16 12:56:34 PM
Hey subby, since a skyscraper is a tall, narrow building, it's gonna look like a penis.

Unless you want a 2 story building that takes up 40 square city blocks.
 
2014-04-16 12:57:33 PM
Ha! I can't believe I managed to fool some people.

One of the "renderings" of those "buildings" is actually my penis!
 
2014-04-16 01:00:17 PM
The Azerbaijan Tower is very reminiscent of Oracle HQ in Redwood shores in design and notorious mass-murderer Sirius Black in name.

i.kinja-img.com
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2014-04-16 01:01:53 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-04-16 01:02:17 PM
The Miami one is the worst, with its little preview showing Porsches & Mercedes coming & going from its artifice of pure luxury.

F*ck Miami and every club-going 1%er who lives there.
 
2014-04-16 01:04:07 PM
I haven't seen CG as bad as in those mockups since the early 90's.  They have thousands, if not tens of thousands, of dollars to spend on those sales pitch mockups and they can't make them look a little more realistic?
 
2014-04-16 01:10:02 PM

flamark: Miapolis? They need to build a smaller version of this in Minnesota and call it Miniapolis.

[i.kinja-img.com image 636x856]


What I see:

img.fark.net
 
2014-04-16 01:38:56 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


Yeah this.  Not everything that points up is a penis you know. Some of them are nipples.
 
2014-04-16 01:43:52 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


What kinds of penises are these people used to seeing if these buildings are so phallic to them?  Do some people have a thin, pointy dick with a spike on the end?

Actually, don't answer that.
 
2014-04-16 01:48:13 PM
I'd love to see how the Miapolis tower would survive another Andrew. I'm sure the center breezeway is supposed to mitigate hurricane-force winds but sometimes things don't quite work as designed.
 
2014-04-16 01:51:50 PM
www.coyoteblog.com


Pfft, amateurs.
 
2014-04-16 02:00:42 PM

StrikitRich: [www.coyoteblog.com image 366x411]


Pfft, amateurs.


img.fark.net

Double-pfft.
 
2014-04-16 02:00:46 PM

MrSteve007: I'm pretty sure by definition, a skyscraper will look somewhat similar to a phallus - especially as the height gets taller; unless you can build a perfectly square skyscraper that is as wide, as it is tall. A 1,000' wide and 1,000' tall cube building would be interesting, but it would leave the people towards the center of the building hundreds of feet away from a window and daylight.

Also, due to aerodynamics and high level winds, as they get taller, they're almost always cylindrical in diameter - so the wind pressure on the windows won't cause the glass to implode - which will make it more phallic in appearance.


For your cube building, just throw a hole in the middle of it like the Domino Sugar Development in Brooklyn, and problem solved...

img.fark.net
 
2014-04-16 02:08:19 PM

DecemberNitro: The Miami one is the worst, with its little preview showing Porsches & Mercedes coming & going from its artifice of pure luxury.

F*ck Miami and every club-going 1%er who lives there.


I watched some of the video and the guy was talking about how it would be built on public land with money from public and private sources. I bet most of the public would never be able to get past the lobby.


Is the one in Dubai still mostly empty?
 
2014-04-16 02:53:50 PM
soo...do you just want to dig a bunch of vagina like holes that become apartments??
 
2014-04-16 03:22:44 PM

rogue49: soo...do you just want to dig a bunch of vagina like holes that become apartments??


In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.
 
2014-04-16 03:30:30 PM

MadMonk: rogue49: soo...do you just want to dig a bunch of vagina like holes that become apartments??

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.


I thought it was a 'man in a boat'?
 
2014-04-16 03:36:31 PM

Tricky Chicken: MadMonk: rogue49: soo...do you just want to dig a bunch of vagina like holes that become apartments??

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.

I thought it was a 'man in a boat'?


Doesn't matter, you still aren't going to find him.
 
2014-04-16 03:54:35 PM
 
2014-04-16 04:38:47 PM

Luven: lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.

Yeah this.  Not everything that points up is a penis you know. Some of them are nipples.


and some are cigars and some are chyna clits.
 
2014-04-16 04:42:33 PM

LewDux: Link
/lp


Great tracks, never heard of them before, but I know them now.
 
2014-04-16 05:16:29 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


This.

c2.staticflickr.com
 
2014-04-16 05:28:10 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


I've taken 4 art appreciation or history classes. They have all made big deals over phallic symbolism in architecture relating to fertility and cultural hegemony. Those were all at the college level, pubic and private, in two states.
 
2014-04-16 05:32:55 PM
dicks.
 
2014-04-16 05:50:21 PM
i3.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-04-16 08:12:15 PM

lewismarktwo: The phallus is a very simple shape, if you see them everywhere it's YOU.


Yah but having twin domed lobbies and untamed landscaping around the bottom is pushing it.
 
2014-04-16 08:41:08 PM
I think your the one seeing the phallic symbols. The whole point of these buildings it to maximize floor space and minimize land usage. Towers are just the best shape to do that.
 
2014-04-16 10:02:35 PM
i.kinja-img.com

You may want to see a doctor if your phallus is shaped like that, subby.

/ Maybe a psychiatrist.
// Sometimes a skyscraper is just a skyscraper.
 
2014-04-16 10:10:37 PM
Future urban skyscrapers:
www.carloscardoso.com


... and hospitals:
caseyhobbs.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-17 05:24:23 AM
th05.deviantart.net
 
2014-04-17 09:17:12 AM

serial_crusher: [i.kinja-img.com image 636x440]

You may want to see a doctor if your phallus is shaped like that, subby.

/ Maybe a psychiatrist.
// Sometimes a skyscraper is just a skyscraper.


Look up duck anatomy.
 
2014-04-17 09:22:43 AM

StrikitRich: [www.coyoteblog.com image 366x411]


Pfft, amateurs.


I work there, and think the same thing on the drive to work every day.

"Did I remember to lock the front door?"
 
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