If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(IGN)   Ubisoft head: "Video games treat gamers like idiots. I don't like the assumption that all people who play games want big chain saws and women in bikinis. Not all gamers are teenage boys, and even teenage boys want more than that"   (ca.ign.com) divider line 398
    More: Unlikely, Ubisoft Montreal, Jade Raymond, gamers, bikinis, tropes  
•       •       •

2818 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 15 Apr 2014 at 9:52 AM (32 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



398 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-04-15 08:46:42 AM  
Ubisoft's head is correct. Some teenage boys are homosexual.
 
2014-04-15 08:52:51 AM  
Yeah. Lose the bikinis.
 
2014-04-15 09:02:40 AM  
"There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream
 
2014-04-15 09:03:50 AM  

scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream


I'd like to play GTA starring an old lady.
 
2014-04-15 09:04:06 AM  
Correct about everything except the tits.  There have been great strides in tit CGI, and more research definitely needs to be done.
 
2014-04-15 09:08:10 AM  
Two words: Hentai Games
 
2014-04-15 09:14:57 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream

I'd like to play GTA starring an old lady.


As would I. But for right now, we'll have to settle for watching a video starring an old lady playing GTA.

/"You're all scum!"
 
2014-04-15 09:25:19 AM  

scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream


Technically, you could play Skyrim as an older woman if you wanted to.
 
2014-04-15 09:54:50 AM  
I played mass effect as an old lady.
 
2014-04-15 09:55:55 AM  
ghosts n goblins had you play as a differently abled old man if you got hit with a curse. cane and everything. palsied.
 
2014-04-15 09:56:18 AM  

scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream


Cagney & Lacey as gritty retired NYC detectives turned Private Investigators.
 
2014-04-15 09:56:50 AM  
Chainsaws and women in bikinis?

I think I've seen that before.

d1vr6n66ssr06c.cloudfront.net

/game was oh so hot.
 
2014-04-15 09:57:00 AM  
'stop treating everyone like an idiot 16 year old boy and start giving them the option to be treated like an idiot old lady or an idiot minority'
 
2014-04-15 09:57:14 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream

I'd like to play GTA starring an old lady.


So that when you run over random pedestrians and back up into cars all the time, it kind of will make sense, right?
 
2014-04-15 09:57:17 AM  

scottydoesntknow: "There still isn't a game where you get to play an old lady. That's my dream."

Create a compelling narrative that justifies you having to play an old lady and people will buy it. People have played all manner of man and beast and there's no reason to think they wouldn't play an old lady as long as there's a good reason for it.

/That's a very odd dream


I had an idea for a Zelda-like game where you play an old woman who's goal is to bring her husband back from a bar. She'd have weapons like a cane, rolling pin, umbrella, etc.

Also:
img.gamefaqs.net
/but this game is so bad no one should play it
 
2014-04-15 09:57:49 AM  
I've never been much of a console gamer, but I've been a keyboard gamer since 1982.

I'm 43, playing mostly Blizzard games nowadays, and my 66 year old father plays some WoW on my account.
 
2014-04-15 09:59:26 AM  
I had an idea for a game called "Get off my lawn." You play a retired engineer (who could be an old lady; they exist) who puts different traps in their yard to stop hooligans racing through and busting their mailbox. Sort of like Plants v Zombies but with springs, walls, baseball bats on robotic arms...
 
2014-04-15 10:01:58 AM  
But every now and then, I  like games with chainsaws and chicks in bikinis.

/34 years old
 
2014-04-15 10:04:59 AM  
I think games are getting too repetitive. With game budgets so high, getting a high quality game out these days means the giant companies that now put out the majority of games are less likely to take chances on games that don't fit a certain mold. It's why, having been a gamer since I was 5 years old, I stop playing last year and sold my consoles. My plan is to pick it back up in a few years and see if it feels new and exciting again.
 
2014-04-15 10:06:13 AM  

featurecreep: I had an idea for a game called "Get off my lawn." You play a retired engineer (who could be an old lady; they exist) who puts different traps in their yard to stop hooligans racing through and busting their mailbox. Sort of like Plants v Zombies but with springs, walls, baseball bats on robotic arms...


My parents' mailbox used to get knocked down by idiot teenagers every summer, so my brother built them a steel mailbox enclosure. He welded a solid steel ball on the top and painted the whole thing to look like wood.

A few weeks later they found shattered glass and a broken baseball bat next to the mailbox. It hasn't been an issue since.
 
2014-04-15 10:06:58 AM  
I feel bad because I want to see the Ubisoft head wearing a bikini and using a chainsaw.
 
2014-04-15 10:08:04 AM  
It'd be great if there were AAA games that had plots other than:

'I'm your AI/tactical commander/general of the last human resistance. Here are some gun fodder ground troops I'm assigning you to. Move in this direction. Oh no there was a huge explosion we can't go that way, go this way! Oh no more minions are spawning! Shoot them! Move move move! Great you killed everyone, get in this helicopter and we'll repeat it again because our plot is a lazy excuse for the barely more interesting multiplayer.'

Of course now the AAA titles are adding amazing things like 'MORE WEAPONS! MORE CREATURES! MORE WAYS TO DO RIDICULOUS PARKOUR THINGS THAT COMPLETELY IGNORE THE LAWS OF PHYSICS AND YOUR MUSCULATURE!'

Oh but totally throw a woman grunt in there, preferably a Mexican chica, so you can claim your game isn't totally misogynistic and lame.
 
2014-04-15 10:09:31 AM  

RockofAges: How about we stop treating video games and gaming in general as a social justice warrior platform? Jesus. Sometimes tits and guns are what we want. Sometimes, I like a good MUD / text game. Most of the time I want Civ. Too much navelgazing going on IMO.



Carrionfields.net.  Just sayin.
 
2014-04-15 10:11:33 AM  
Okay but I still want a cheat mode where I can be a hot chick in a bikini wielding a chainsaw.

www.extraguy.com

Maybe one modeled after you.
 
2014-04-15 10:11:52 AM  
If you have Ubisoft Head, you should see a doctor.
 
2014-04-15 10:12:57 AM  
Granny In Paradise

/yes I have kids.  Shaddup
 
2014-04-15 10:13:12 AM  

RockofAges: How about we stop treating video games and gaming in general as a social justice warrior platform? Jesus. Sometimes tits and guns are what we want. Sometimes, I like a good MUD / text game. Most of the time I want Civ. Too much navelgazing going on IMO.


That's what gaming has turned into. Everyone really bought into that "gaming as art" crap and now people seem to think games have to have a social message and promote equality.

Fark that, it's a game it should be FUN. I don't want to play a game as an old lady because that's not fun. Eastern European criminal? That's fun. Some sex and violence mixed in with your gaming? Fun. Bunch of wankstains trying to send social messages through my hobby by forcing equal representation of all races and ages? Not fun.

/but what do the video game bloggers think about this? I'm sure they have insightful opinions
 
2014-04-15 10:15:49 AM  
The first line is true, at least. The game industry does tone games down to make sure a 3 year old can understand them and never be frustrated. Not always, but it is a common theme. Anyone that grew up pre-N64/PS1 can tell you that games back then were serious business. There was no hand-holding and spoon feeding.

There was no built in tutorial. There were no infinite-lives-by-design. You play a game for 7 hours and screw up? Game over, man. Game over. Restart from scratch. And while that is too extreme, for sure, there is a median there between frustrating and having a challenge that gives you that sense of accomplishment when you overcome it. That sense of accomplishment is missing from 90% of the titles out there.

I can't remember more than 3 games from the last decade where I felt like I really had to give it my all. Where I had to sit on the can and seriously consider my tactics and timing and enemy behavior and all that. Then, after a lot of thought, executed with blood and tears, came out victorious. That used to be so common. If you want that now, you have to seek it out.

Sid Meier's games - any of them, from any time - on the hardest difficulty are fantastic for making your mind bend in ways it's not used to in order to claim victory. Playing Civ5 on Warlord requires careful planning and execution of every single move - especially for some of the achievements. You can't just go get more troops and zerg something.

Anyway ... I don't like being mocked and talked down to. And anytime a game feels like they need to explain every little thing or, say, or make sure the game is easy enough to beat without spurring emotion - Yeah, I just feel insulted. I can handle it. Gimme your worst. I beat Silver Surfer on the NES. You don't scare me.

And yeah, a nicely rendered female will always make a game better. It's not just a sex thing. Seeing any attractive person raises spirits, even if they serve no purpose. That's life. No 8-bit renders, though.
 
2014-04-15 10:16:19 AM  

bdub77: It'd be great if there were AAA games that had plots other than:

'I'm your AI/tactical commander/general of the last human resistance. Here are some gun fodder ground troops I'm assigning you to. Move in this direction. Oh no there was a huge explosion we can't go that way, go this way! Oh no more minions are spawning! Shoot them! Move move move! Great you killed everyone, get in this helicopter and we'll repeat it again because our plot is a lazy excuse for the barely more interesting multiplayer.'

Of course now the AAA titles are adding amazing things like 'MORE WEAPONS! MORE CREATURES! MORE WAYS TO DO RIDICULOUS PARKOUR THINGS THAT COMPLETELY IGNORE THE LAWS OF PHYSICS AND YOUR MUSCULATURE!'

Oh but totally throw a woman grunt in there, preferably a Mexican chica, so you can claim your game isn't totally misogynistic and lame.


I thought the new tomb raider was well done. Played it on both PS3 and PS4.
 
2014-04-15 10:19:24 AM  

JPSimonetti: And while that is too extreme, for sure, there is a median there between frustrating and having a challenge that gives you that sense of accomplishment when you overcome it.


See for instance Zelda and Half Life
 
2014-04-15 10:19:55 AM  
There's definitely potential for games that don't feature the typical power-fantasy 'roid machine and/or Playboy model with a weapon type of protagonists.  A survival horror game where you control a disabled person in a wheelchair, for instance.  An L.A. Noire type game but you're playing the nearly retired fat detective.  You can't really chase down suspects, but you've established quite a network of informants and people who owe you favors to help you out.  There are plenty of possibilities for fun and exciting games that aren't all about absurdly fit people running around killing things.
 
2014-04-15 10:20:51 AM  

olapbill: bdub77: It'd be great if there were AAA games that had plots other than:

'I'm your AI/tactical commander/general of the last human resistance. Here are some gun fodder ground troops I'm assigning you to. Move in this direction. Oh no there was a huge explosion we can't go that way, go this way! Oh no more minions are spawning! Shoot them! Move move move! Great you killed everyone, get in this helicopter and we'll repeat it again because our plot is a lazy excuse for the barely more interesting multiplayer.'

Of course now the AAA titles are adding amazing things like 'MORE WEAPONS! MORE CREATURES! MORE WAYS TO DO RIDICULOUS PARKOUR THINGS THAT COMPLETELY IGNORE THE LAWS OF PHYSICS AND YOUR MUSCULATURE!'

Oh but totally throw a woman grunt in there, preferably a Mexican chica, so you can claim your game isn't totally misogynistic and lame.

I thought the new tomb raider was well done. Played it on both PS3 and PS4.


It's okay. He just needed to vent.
 
2014-04-15 10:21:34 AM  

Semper IvXx: RockofAges: How about we stop treating video games and gaming in general as a social justice warrior platform? Jesus. Sometimes tits and guns are what we want. Sometimes, I like a good MUD / text game. Most of the time I want Civ. Too much navelgazing going on IMO.

That's what gaming has turned into. Everyone really bought into that "gaming as art" crap and now people seem to think games have to have a social message and promote equality.

Fark that, it's a game it should be FUN. I don't want to play a game as an old lady because that's not fun. Eastern European criminal? That's fun. Some sex and violence mixed in with your gaming? Fun. Bunch of wankstains trying to send social messages through my hobby by forcing equal representation of all races and ages? Not fun.

/but what do the video game bloggers think about this? I'm sure they have insightful opinions


What the hell are you talking about? The vast majority of games are like that. The number of artful games is tiny in comparison. Most of us would like there to be more options. That means you can play Cybercriminal Raper 4 and I can play something that actually has an interesting storyline with subtext.
 
2014-04-15 10:22:21 AM  
I lost all liking for Ubisoft after they screwed over the fans by making Splinter Cell a shooter instead of the stealth game the fans wanted because they thought it would sell better.
 
2014-04-15 10:23:14 AM  

Keywork99: But every now and then, I  like games with chainsaws and chicks in bikinis.

/34 years old


That.

I mean, in principle I agree with Ubisoft dude. I aint droppin no $60 on Lollipop Chainsaw. Lol, no. Now $10 to $15 bucks or RENT it? Sure.

The best example of what I want sex wise is Mass Effect. Every character model is hubba-hubba worthy. But that's not the focus of the game. If the focus of the game is the bikinis and chainsaws, generally those games suck.
 
2014-04-15 10:24:50 AM  

Semper IvXx: RockofAges: How about we stop treating video games and gaming in general as a social justice warrior platform? Jesus. Sometimes tits and guns are what we want. Sometimes, I like a good MUD / text game. Most of the time I want Civ. Too much navelgazing going on IMO.

That's what gaming has turned into. Everyone really bought into that "gaming as art" crap and now people seem to think games have to have a social message and promote equality.

Fark that, it's a game it should be FUN. I don't want to play a game as an old lady because that's not fun. Eastern European criminal? That's fun. Some sex and violence mixed in with your gaming? Fun. Bunch of wankstains trying to send social messages through my hobby by forcing equal representation of all races and ages? Not fun.

/but what do the video game bloggers think about this? I'm sure they have insightful opinions


The important thing is that you've managed to make it all about you and what you want.  Must be horrible that the gaming industry is slowly changing to cater to the desires of more of their fanbase instead of just you.
 
2014-04-15 10:25:51 AM  
"Waaaah. I don't like something! Everyone else needs to change to appease me!!!"
 
2014-04-15 10:26:19 AM  
But, is there any way a developer could make a crazy game in which I'm free-roaming in a first-person-shooter style game that takes place after the apocalypse? I've never seen one of those video games, is there a studio that would please make one already?
 
2014-04-15 10:26:42 AM  

ModernPrimitive01: I think games are getting too repetitive. With game budgets so high, getting a high quality game out these days means the giant companies that now put out the majority of games are less likely to take chances on games that don't fit a certain mold. It's why, having been a gamer since I was 5 years old, I stop playing last year and sold my consoles. My plan is to pick it back up in a few years and see if it feels new and exciting again.


Video games suffer from the same problem as movies: AAA production is too expensive to take actual risks.

Also there's a legion of autistic mouthbreathers who think that making some games without T and A means someone has ruined their lives by cramming an agenda down their throat.

It's the same argument over and over again.  People want to explore the medium and evolve its general position in society.  Popular games get a pass on being designed to be blatantly titillating for male teenagers.  It's so ingrained it's assumed to be the default (especially in Japanese games) and talking about  not making it the default is seen as an attack on the concept of videogames itself.

I don't need to be constantly titillated in my videogames.  I play them for different reasons than that, and derive much enjoyment from the challenge, the puzzles, the mechanics, the story, the art, and the thrill.

It bothers me that sometimes in order to play a great game I have to put up with a bunch of sexualized nonsense.  It's not in every game and western studios are much better at it, but I can't stand how some games will just pander by shoving in fanservice.

/oh no now i'm a SJW the worst thing in the world next to a hipster
 
2014-04-15 10:28:53 AM  

baconbeard: "Waaaah. I don't like something! Everyone else needs to change to appease me!!!"


Hey, that's a pretty good impression of the dudebro gamers biatching in this thread.  Nice one.
 
2014-04-15 10:30:00 AM  
The games that were the most challenging/frustrating are the ones you have the most satisfaction out of winning and remember the most fondly.

Also they tend to give you more play hours for your money than the dumbed down things you burn through in an evening.

I still miss the heyday of Ultima Online.  If you got reckless and got PKed you lost all your stuff. Choice and Consequence...

/I know, a foreign idea for many these days...
 
2014-04-15 10:30:32 AM  

ReapTheChaos: I lost all liking for Ubisoft after they screwed over the fans by making Splinter Cell a shooter instead of the stealth game the fans wanted because they thought it would sell better.


You should try Splinter Cell: Blacklist.  It puts back the stealth elements that were all but removed from Conviction, while also keeping the combat fast-paced and fluid.  Many fans have called it the best Splinter Cell yet.  Even better than Chaos Theory.
 
2014-04-15 10:30:40 AM  

JPSimonetti: The first line is true, at least. The game industry does tone games down to make sure a 3 year old can understand them and never be frustrated. Not always, but it is a common theme. Anyone that grew up pre-N64/PS1 can tell you that games back then were serious business


img.fark.net
 
2014-04-15 10:32:13 AM  

JPSimonetti: The game industry does tone games down to make sure a 3 year old can understand them and never be frustrated. Not always, but it is a common theme. Anyone that grew up pre-N64/PS1 can tell you that games back then were serious business


"nintendo hard" is a myth and a stupid one. you had games with literally two buttons to push, of course you didn't need a tutorial. playing was a matter of twitch and grind because of the limitations of the systems combined with the ubiquitous coin-op monetization meme

JPSimonetti: I can't remember more than 3 games from the last decade where I felt like I really had to give it my all. Where I had to sit on the can and seriously consider my tactics and timing and enemy behavior and all that. Then, after a lot of thought, executed with blood and tears, came out victorious. That used to be so common. If you want that now, you have to seek it out.


the last sentence is the only sort of true part of this whole thing, and it's always been true. the distinction is that now you have to sort through more than just pointless/mindless challenge

JPSimonetti: Sid Meier's games - any of them, from any time - on the hardest difficulty are fantastic for making your mind bend in ways it's not used to in order to claim victory.


no, it just makes you come up with a strategy that lets you break the ai (like siam city state cheese). that you bring up civ 5 as some prime example is telling - it's suffered from the worst ai by far because of how much more complicated it makes the tactical battleground.

JPSimonetti: Anyway ... I don't like being mocked and talked down to.


then stop taking positions that should be mocked like "games were good back when they were bad and why don't they make games like they were coin operated"
 
2014-04-15 10:33:06 AM  
img2.wikia.nocookie.net 
Unanimous rave reviews. Frequently rated not just Game of the Year, but best game of the system generation. No bikinis.
 
2014-04-15 10:33:06 AM  

RockofAges: bdub77: Semper IvXx: RockofAges: How about we stop treating video games and gaming in general as a social justice warrior platform? Jesus. Sometimes tits and guns are what we want. Sometimes, I like a good MUD / text game. Most of the time I want Civ. Too much navelgazing going on IMO.

That's what gaming has turned into. Everyone really bought into that "gaming as art" crap and now people seem to think games have to have a social message and promote equality.

Fark that, it's a game it should be FUN. I don't want to play a game as an old lady because that's not fun. Eastern European criminal? That's fun. Some sex and violence mixed in with your gaming? Fun. Bunch of wankstains trying to send social messages through my hobby by forcing equal representation of all races and ages? Not fun.

/but what do the video game bloggers think about this? I'm sure they have insightful opinions

What the hell are you talking about? The vast majority of games are like that. The number of artful games is tiny in comparison. Most of us would like there to be more options. That means you can play Cybercriminal Raper 4 and I can play something that actually has an interesting storyline with subtext.

You're a caricature. Don't you have some manufactured outrage to be peddling about the male gaze and cyberpatriarchy? You're not a gamer, you're a whiner who happens to game.


Now that is funny right there.
 
2014-04-15 10:33:09 AM  

Teufelaffe: There's definitely potential for games that don't feature the typical power-fantasy 'roid machine and/or Playboy model with a weapon type of protagonists.  A survival horror game where you control a disabled person in a wheelchair, for instance.  An L.A. Noire type game but you're playing the nearly retired fat detective.  You can't really chase down suspects, but you've established quite a network of informants and people who owe you favors to help you out.  There are plenty of possibilities for fun and exciting games that aren't all about absurdly fit people running around killing things.


That only makes sense if people are secretly clamoring for games that give them LESS ability on screen than they have IRL, and to make games "more realistic" in the same way you would have to make your character take a piss takes a bit of the "fun/fantasy" out of the experience. The whole point of roided-up jockbags is that "that's what men want to be, and that's what women want to see" and Playboy'd up tit-supports are "what women want to be and what men want to see".

Of course that's reductionist, simplistic, and frankly, insulting (both to men and women). It's not to say that those are the only archetypes allowed (though certainly "encouraged", for some stupid reason), and as you say, for there to be an old woman protagonist in Call of War: MOAR BLOODZ simply doesn't make sense. Make her the protagonist of GTA6, with a bodyguard like "Driving Mob Daisy", have her curse like a drunken sailor with Tourette's in the language center, some funny animations when she uses a big gun (or rocket launcher), and viola!

// I'll take $5million in unmarked bills, please
 
2014-04-15 10:36:44 AM  

Teufelaffe: There's definitely potential for games that don't feature the typical power-fantasy 'roid machine and/or Playboy model with a weapon type of protagonists.  A survival horror game where you control a disabled person in a wheelchair, for instance.  An L.A. Noire type game but you're playing the nearly retired fat detective.  You can't really chase down suspects, but you've established quite a network of informants and people who owe you favors to help you out.  There are plenty of possibilities for fun and exciting games that aren't all about absurdly fit people running around killing things.


I completely agree with you.  You can see more of this in the indie, low budget scene, where people take more risks.

I don't know if you meant to reference this, but there IS a wheelchair horror game being developed. (by some small Polish developer)   http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=183179087

It got some press a while ago because of how noteworthy it is to force the protagonist into a wheelchair, which really does seem even more terrifying.
 
Skr
2014-04-15 10:37:11 AM  
Make it enjoyable & intuitive and you'll probably find an audience. I'm not sure wanting sexuality and violence in games makes one an idiot, though it kinda seemed like it was implied. Comes down to balancing things proper.

Though instead of idiots, Ubisoft did end up treating a portion of their gaming customers like pirates with their always-on-drm they were hawking a few years ago. Solo games keyed to a handshake with an online server, prone to outage. Bad juju. I remember at least one game launch that went horribly as a result. The pirate groups had workarounds, but the paying customers had games they couldn't authenticate.
 
2014-04-15 10:37:35 AM  
I like games where my character is a Rifter frigate... or a su-37 with yellow squadron paint scheme.

(Hoping I get a chance to fly an Origin Jumpworks 300i sometime this decade.)

You guys can keep playing whatever silly non-aerial crap the rest of the normies play.
 
Displayed 50 of 398 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report