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(Sun Sentinel)   It's one thing to break into my home to take a shower. But did you have to take my lunch meat as well?   ( sun-sentinel.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Palm Beach County News, showers, burglary  
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2140 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Apr 2014 at 4:35 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-14 03:01:00 PM  
And I'll be back for my blender.
 
2014-04-14 03:12:48 PM  
Same thing happened to me, stole my tv, playstation, surround receiver.... and all the beer outta the fridge.. thats just mean!
 
2014-04-14 03:36:50 PM  
Yes....but did the burglar take the lunch meat into the shower?

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-04-14 03:59:20 PM  
 
2014-04-14 04:36:16 PM  
Had my jewelry, TV, X-box and bottle of whiskey stolen when my apartment got broken into a few years back.

I miss that whiskey :(
 
2014-04-14 04:40:14 PM  
How do you take a whole shower? Wouldn't it be really awkward to carry down the street? What about the tub, did he get that too?
 
2014-04-14 04:40:24 PM  
Baloney
 
2014-04-14 04:44:29 PM  
Don't worry, he'll return it.
 
2014-04-14 04:46:10 PM  
You see these pretty frequently in Florida. Most folks burglarize to cover (perceived) needs. So if they're hungry, they'll grab something to eat too. Some even catch a nap in a 'safe' area in the home.
 
2014-04-14 04:47:10 PM  
You didn't have to stoop so low.
 
2014-04-14 04:48:29 PM  
Came for Kramer reference.

/Leaving satisfied
 
2014-04-14 04:48:57 PM  
But a guard dog and name it Rami. No burglar will ever get past Rami.
 
2014-04-14 04:53:50 PM  
Well, what was I supposed to fark in the shower?
 
2014-04-14 04:55:17 PM  
Wait until you find out what he did to the leftover pot roast.
 
2014-04-14 05:10:55 PM  
Burgularing make a person hungry.
 
2014-04-14 05:28:35 PM  
There's limited information in the article, but at least it seems this person wasn't a complete lowlife about it.  They didn't ransack the place.  They didn't steal a bunch of stuff for personal profit.  They took a shower and grabbed some food.  If my house is going to be burglarized, this would be the optimal situation.

/strange thoughts
 
2014-04-14 05:34:23 PM  

Khellendros: There's limited information in the article, but at least it seems this person wasn't a complete lowlife about it.  They didn't ransack the place.  They didn't steal a bunch of stuff for personal profit.  They took a shower and grabbed some food.  If my house is going to be burglarized, this would be the optimal situation.

/strange thoughts


also, my level of outrage would hinge on the quality of the lunch meat.

take some cheap ham or turkey, i'll live.  take some iberico ham, or that hogshead cheese i got in thibodaux, or all that salumi i got from a pretentious place that calls it salumi, and I'm calling the FBI.
 
2014-04-14 05:35:37 PM  
as long as they left my stapler.
 
2014-04-14 05:40:08 PM  

pute kisses like a man: also, my level of outrage would hinge on the quality of the lunch meat.

take some cheap ham or turkey, i'll live. take some iberico ham, or that hogshead cheese i got in thibodaux, or all that salumi i got from a pretentious place that calls it salumi, and I'm calling the FBI.


That's true.  He snags my prosciutto, I'll be looking for blood.  Good point.
 
2014-04-14 05:42:24 PM  
I had a burglar break my Louisville Slugger.

To be fair to the scum bag, it took three tries.

/it took 1.5 hours for cops to arrive
//whiney little basturd cried the whole time
///peed, crapped, and bled on my new carpet.
 
2014-04-14 05:44:13 PM  

pute kisses like a man: Khellendros: There's limited information in the article, but at least it seems this person wasn't a complete lowlife about it.  They didn't ransack the place.  They didn't steal a bunch of stuff for personal profit.  They took a shower and grabbed some food.  If my house is going to be burglarized, this would be the optimal situation.

/strange thoughts

also, my level of outrage would hinge on the quality of the lunch meat.

take some cheap ham or turkey, i'll live.  take some iberico ham, or that hogshead cheese i got in thibodaux, or all that salumi i got from a pretentious place that calls it salumi, and I'm calling the FBI.


"salumi"? Seriously? I had to google it. I thought it was a joke. Or a typo.
 
2014-04-14 05:50:07 PM  
You have to clean out your fridge anyway, man.  The rump roast farted in my face when I opened the door.
 
2014-04-14 07:40:19 PM  
He'll be back to take a dump and get another sandwich
 
2014-04-14 07:40:30 PM  
Wasn't there a scene like that in American Pie except it was pie instead of salami.
 
2014-04-15 03:43:47 AM  
my signature move is to shiat on the living room floor or anywhere there is carpet, really. i just find that very amusing. they probably call me the shiatting burglar or something.
 
2014-04-15 05:39:02 AM  
Look, a naked guy was fingering your cold cuts. Let em go, man, cause they're gone.
 
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