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(NPR)   Advice article for people just getting into online gaming tells them to ignore the social aspects of the game because online trolls are scary. Up next: advice article for dealing with non-communicative noobs ruining your favorite online game   (npr.org) divider line 51
    More: Stupid, online games, grammatical aspect, trolls, console wars, vocal minority, Team Fortress, girl gamer, Left 4 Dead 2  
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2639 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Apr 2014 at 2:35 PM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-04-14 03:41:53 PM
7 votes:

ObscureNameHere: Best online trash talk response I saw in World of Tanks:

[OtherTeamGuy]: "You guys are gonna get ass-raped!"

[OurTeamGuy]: "Your're Mom bought a strap-on?"


A buddy used to play the old Team Fortress with the handle "His Gay Lover" so the kill messages on-screen would read "Noobkilla22 (killed by) His Gay Lover"...it actually made more than one teen go apoplectic, then rage-quit.
2014-04-14 02:46:18 PM
6 votes:
img.fark.net
2014-04-14 02:41:37 PM
4 votes:
Goddammit, stop making games that I need to interact with other people in order to play.

That's not what videogames are for.
2014-04-14 02:37:26 PM
4 votes:
god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?
2014-04-14 01:29:18 PM
4 votes:
You're going to be surprised with the number of people your mother has slept with.
2014-04-14 04:01:49 PM
3 votes:
i.imgur.com
2014-04-14 03:39:32 PM
3 votes:

Lando Lincoln: The world of online gaming would be sooo much better if parents would not buy their kids microphone headsets until they turned 18.


It's hilarious when someone on a raid starts swearing at a less-than-perfect party member, and then you hear in  his background something like "JOHNNY!  WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT SWEARING?  NO MORE COMPUTER TONIGHT!!!"  followed by "Awww, Mooooommm" and then get the system message "Noobslayer22 has disconnected"....
2014-04-14 03:30:56 PM
3 votes:

LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........


But you fark one goat....
2014-04-14 02:50:17 PM
3 votes:

LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........


Your EVE FC was pretty farking stupid to say that. The reality is you were giving your whole fleet HIV, which is the virus that causes AIDS. You can't just give your fleet AIDS. It doesn't work like that and your EVE FC is a degenerate farking retard for suggesting otherwise.
2014-04-14 02:46:18 PM
3 votes:

DubyaHater: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

I usually log on to protect the female gamers from these vile people.


I play online games looking for romance from gamers trying to protect my delicate female sensibilities from vile people.
2014-04-14 01:32:45 PM
3 votes:
LEEEEERROOOOOOOOOYYY...nevermind
2014-04-14 04:51:00 PM
2 votes:

elchupacabra: Weatherkiss: LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........

Your EVE FC was pretty farking stupid to say that. The reality is you were giving your whole fleet HIV, which is the virus that causes AIDS. You can't just give your fleet AIDS. It doesn't work like that and your EVE FC is a degenerate farking retard for suggesting otherwise.

Still, that's a fleet's worth of buttsecks or heroin needles.


Buggering is one of the navy's oldest traditions along with rum and the flog. I can't imagine such thing not going into space with the rest of humanity.
2014-04-14 03:56:28 PM
2 votes:
i.imgur.com


i.imgur.com
2014-04-14 03:36:11 PM
2 votes:

Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.


That happened to me too. Random strangers would lavish me with gifts. It was creepy.

I do recall, humorously, that a female elf I played with one time ended up being a guy with a thick Texas drawl.
2014-04-14 03:26:10 PM
2 votes:

Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.


I play female avatars (game devs typically give female avatars better fashion choices), but if guys bother me I casually bring up that I have a horrible cocaine addiction. 99% of the guys get confused and disoriented like a stun grenade just went off and stop talking to you while they try to comprehend just what happened.

The 1% that don't leave you alone are typically pretty interesting enough to keep as friends.
2014-04-14 03:23:44 PM
2 votes:
I've been harassed and threatened with violence online, but what really bothered me was the poor spelling and grammar.  If someone is going to insult and/or threaten me, at least take the time to proofread what is written.  How hard is that?

I'm not a grammar Nazi but I feel there needs to be better focus on construction of sentences.
2014-04-14 03:03:20 PM
2 votes:
My advice is to get ridiculously good at a single aspect of the game and ignore the rest.

And that's why I almost exclusively play Huntsman sniper in TF2.

/I am part of the problem
2014-04-14 02:57:35 PM
2 votes:
Incommunicative noob here: I've learned not to talk to anybody. It's come from lots of experience.

Look I've tried talking to people, but first and foremost they tell me how terrible I am. (Hi everybody, I'm bad at video games and I don't give a shiat. You're 14 and you're tired of my shiat. But I'm in a newbie area and that's what it's for. You're a 40yo quadriplegic and you play this all day to keep from going crazy, I don't.)

Other problem is the assholes.
2014-04-14 02:55:16 PM
2 votes:

Aidan: cgraves67: Don't get involved unless you are a) willing to dedicate a lot, A LOT, of time to the game, or b) you are fine with labeled derogatory terms. It takes a lot of time to get good skills, equipment, and access and to be well-regarded for them.

I have avoided any kind of interaction with other players on the vast majority of games I play because of this (and I avoid MMOs on the whole for this and other reasons). However I did actually find a tiny little MMO that I enjoy playing where almost all the people on the server are actually... Normal. No slurs, very little douchebaggery of any kind, and when it does happen, people just talk around the person doing it.

I like it, but it's so different from my experience that I'm always a bit weirded out by how... nice it all is...


Sounds like a Canadian game. We've probay never met it.
2014-04-14 02:54:50 PM
2 votes:

pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult


take it up the arse like a man you farking pussy-farker.
2014-04-14 02:54:21 PM
2 votes:
l-userpic.livejournal.com

"Also, it turns out that if you put as much effort into your actual life as you put into Battlefield of Warcraft IV: Civilization of Duty, you can actually be a world-class athlete, captain of industry, or respected military leader.  Details coming up at 11, but first here's Willard with the weather."
2014-04-14 02:50:53 PM
2 votes:

Weatherkiss: DubyaHater: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

I usually log on to protect the female gamers from these vile people.

I play online games looking for romance from gamers trying to protect my delicate female sensibilities from vile people.


My username is whiteknight1.  I'll be on from 6-10 tonight.  See you then.
2014-04-14 02:48:43 PM
2 votes:
There's no way in Bowser's lava I would have been able to beat Ninja Gaiden back in 1989 had some farktwit been screaming unfunny yo mamma jokes randomly into my ear.

In fact, back in the 1980s and '90s, such behavior was grounds for a punch in the face. We took our gaming fairly seriously back then too.
2014-04-14 02:48:25 PM
2 votes:

pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult


I was called a coontlicker once.  Didn't really have a problem with it.
2014-04-14 02:47:28 PM
2 votes:
My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........
2014-04-14 02:45:18 PM
2 votes:
If I can't make some teenage girl cry online then what's the point?
2014-04-14 02:42:23 PM
2 votes:

charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?


I usually log on to protect the female gamers from these vile people.
2014-04-14 02:41:41 PM
2 votes:

charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?


once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult
2014-04-14 02:41:36 PM
2 votes:

charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?


Because I am racist, sexist and homophobic.

Also Taxed Enough Already.
2014-04-14 01:59:02 PM
2 votes:
i.imgur.com
2014-04-14 09:06:29 PM
1 votes:

evilmrsock: pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult

take it up the arse like a man you farking pussy-farker.


Sleeping with women is for poofs.
2014-04-14 07:36:42 PM
1 votes:

pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult


Some kid once got so mad be ended up accusing me of sleeping with HIS mom
2014-04-14 05:45:27 PM
1 votes:

I May Be Crazy But...: GloomCookie613: /You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...


I'm amused by people who say they've farked my mom. Telling them they should consider going to the clinic for some blood tests usually slows them down. I once tried "Oh, you must be the one she told me about. Her nickname for you was 'Tiny'," but that just made the person worse.


Pretend to burst out crying and sob, "MY MOM'S DEAD YOU ASSfark!" Last time I did that the kid stumbled all over himself to apologize until I told him I was just farking with him. Yes, I am an evil biatch sometimes.
2014-04-14 05:23:06 PM
1 votes:

cgraves67: Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.

That happened to me too. Random strangers would lavish me with gifts. It was creepy.

I do recall, humorously, that a female elf I played with one time ended up being a guy with a thick Texas drawl.


I've had this happen in reverse; I'm a guy playing a guy; yet I meet dozens of people who cannot be dissuaded from the notion I'm a girl playing a guy character. Bizzare.
2014-04-14 05:01:44 PM
1 votes:

GloomCookie613: /You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...



I'm amused by people who say they've farked my mom. Telling them they should consider going to the clinic for some blood tests usually slows them down. I once tried "Oh, you must be the one she told me about. Her nickname for you was 'Tiny'," but that just made the person worse.
2014-04-14 04:53:07 PM
1 votes:

Abuse Liability: GloomCookie613: Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.

I am a female, play with female avatars, and then get told there's no way I'm a girl because my voice isn't girly enough. When I play with male avatars I get told I sound like a biatch because they assume I'm a dude. Just can't effing win!

We call this the 13-year old boy effect.  I've seriously had trouble differentiating girls from some younger men.  The maturity level usually corrects the problem.  Usually only takes about 30 seconds of actual conversation to sort them.


Honestly, I've seen all types: The fawners, the haters, the quest-time masturbators, and the normal folks that just want to play the game. "Mute" is a beautiful thing sometimes. Usually it's those of the undescended testes that argue that I can't be a girl and usually after I've kicked their asses or done well. I think, maybe, it's a case of being butthurt by being beaten by a girl so if they pretend I'm a teenage guy like them, they're still manly men in their minds. Regardless, that crap is why I rarely talk with other players and online game a lot less. That crap gets old after awhile and ruins the whole experience.

/You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...
2014-04-14 04:41:49 PM
1 votes:

ObscureNameHere: Best online trash talk response I saw in World of Tanks:

[OtherTeamGuy]: "You guys are gonna get ass-raped!"

[OurTeamGuy]: "Your're Mom bought a strap-on?"


Best one I've had in WoT was this.  I'm in clan OOPS, so my name looks like 'Toraque[OOPS]'

Dipshiat: "Oops?  That's the name I have for my dog."
Me: "What a coincidence!  Dog is the name I have for your mom."
2014-04-14 04:16:15 PM
1 votes:

Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass


I used to do that, but then I realized that I had no good answer if my wife asked me why my character looks sorta like her in every game I play that lets you choose.

Mind you, it could be worse. It could look like, well, her best friend or something.
2014-04-14 04:09:19 PM
1 votes:

Duane Dibbley: Commodore of course. Legendary game music and if you had a disc drive you could play astonishing and ambitious disc-only games as well as the ones ported to or from the others.


TEAM COMMODORE!

/Still have one, stored at my parent's house.
2014-04-14 03:53:36 PM
1 votes:
Quite a few female gamers in this thread have offered their perspectives on gender inequality in MMOs.  I'd like to offer a succinct counterpoint to their well developed theories, musings, and observations.

/BIE
//EIP
2014-04-14 03:51:31 PM
1 votes:

Superjew: Goddammit, stop making games that I need to interact with other people in order to play.

That's not what videogames are for.


this, dammit.hell, i could never get past forced coop in red alert 3
2014-04-14 03:44:47 PM
1 votes:

Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.


I am a female, play with female avatars, and then get told there's no way I'm a girl because my voice isn't girly enough. When I play with male avatars I get told I sound like a biatch because they assume I'm a dude. Just can't effing win!
2014-04-14 03:27:49 PM
1 votes:

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: [img.fark.net image 457x657]


That's hilarious!!!!  How did you find that photo of me?

Back on topic: Videogames were invented so people could have fun WITHOUT HAVING TO FIND SOMEBODY ELSE TO PLAY WITH.  Stop ruining them by making having friends mandatory.  You don't need to be old to appreciate the benefits of not having to deal with other people.
2014-04-14 03:27:02 PM
1 votes:
Avoid the general chat, don't take anything personally and you'll be fine.  Join a guild that caters to new players, they exist.

Rift's /4 is almost as bad as WoW's Barrens' chat.  The discussions between factions are bad since the factions share a general chat on PvE servers.

In the past I've seen multiple secret service worthy threats on Rift when they first went F2P. Not for a while though, as they tend to get banned really, REALLY quickly.   We just have the run of the mill people bragging about their drug use, and random conspiracy theories now.

Path of Exile's chat is a cesspool though....
2014-04-14 03:19:54 PM
1 votes:
Best online trash talk response I saw in World of Tanks:

[OtherTeamGuy]: "You guys are gonna get ass-raped!"

[OurTeamGuy]: "Your're Mom bought a strap-on?"
2014-04-14 03:16:19 PM
1 votes:

Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.


When I fall in love online, and find out the "bromance" is really a hetero thing, I regress back to being mentally 13 years old, and want to kill myself. Thanks, phoney!
2014-04-14 03:04:30 PM
1 votes:

El Dudereno: Aidan: cgraves67: Don't get involved unless you are a) willing to dedicate a lot, A LOT, of time to the game, or b) you are fine with labeled derogatory terms. It takes a lot of time to get good skills, equipment, and access and to be well-regarded for them.

I have avoided any kind of interaction with other players on the vast majority of games I play because of this (and I avoid MMOs on the whole for this and other reasons). However I did actually find a tiny little MMO that I enjoy playing where almost all the people on the server are actually... Normal. No slurs, very little douchebaggery of any kind, and when it does happen, people just talk around the person doing it.

I like it, but it's so different from my experience that I'm always a bit weirded out by how... nice it all is...

Sounds like a Canadian game. We've probay never met it.


I mean, have you gotten any games locally?  I mean besides all the lovely games in the Niagra Falls area.

richfulllife.files.wordpress.com
2014-04-14 03:04:15 PM
1 votes:
My wife is looking for a new lap top and tells the salesman she does a lot of on line gaming. He starts to up sell her.  I had to step in and explain....no no no.   "Honey farmville and candy crush saga really isn't what they mean"
2014-04-14 03:01:23 PM
1 votes:
Man On Pink Corner:

"Also, it turns out that if you put as much effort into your actual life as you put into Battlefield of Warcraft IV: Civilization of Duty, you can actually be a world-class athlete, captain of industry, or respected military leader.  Details coming up at 11, but first here's Willard with the weather."

(a) I blew out my knee, developed arthritis, and will now have to get shots for the rest of my life to walk without pain.
(b) I'm not greedy and I hate greedy people.
(c) I can't stand the sight of blood. It freaks me out.
2014-04-14 02:45:43 PM
1 votes:

gopher321: LEEEEERROOOOOOOOOYYY...nevermind


Still makes me laugh.  Thanks!

/Least I got chicken
2014-04-14 02:44:47 PM
1 votes:
Waah, people playing the online game don't want me to call them slurs, waaah!
 
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