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(NPR)   Advice article for people just getting into online gaming tells them to ignore the social aspects of the game because online trolls are scary. Up next: advice article for dealing with non-communicative noobs ruining your favorite online game   (npr.org) divider line 136
    More: Stupid, online games, grammatical aspect, trolls, console wars, vocal minority, Team Fortress, girl gamer, Left 4 Dead 2  
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2639 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Apr 2014 at 2:35 PM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-14 04:24:11 PM

pute kisses like a man: the first time i chose to play a female character for aesthetic reasons was vampire the masquerade bloodlines because the male models were too large and goofy looking in 3rd person.


I thought about that, but I played the Nosferatu character and... yeah. The male was bad enough.
 
2014-04-14 04:37:06 PM

MaliFinn: People are terrible, internet or not


The truth.
 
2014-04-14 04:39:29 PM

Weatherkiss: LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........

Your EVE FC was pretty farking stupid to say that. The reality is you were giving your whole fleet HIV, which is the virus that causes AIDS. You can't just give your fleet AIDS. It doesn't work like that and your EVE FC is a degenerate farking retard for suggesting otherwise.


+1 interwebz
would lol again
 
2014-04-14 04:41:49 PM

ObscureNameHere: Best online trash talk response I saw in World of Tanks:

[OtherTeamGuy]: "You guys are gonna get ass-raped!"

[OurTeamGuy]: "Your're Mom bought a strap-on?"


Best one I've had in WoT was this.  I'm in clan OOPS, so my name looks like 'Toraque[OOPS]'

Dipshiat: "Oops?  That's the name I have for my dog."
Me: "What a coincidence!  Dog is the name I have for your mom."
 
2014-04-14 04:49:12 PM

Weatherkiss: LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........

Your EVE FC was pretty farking stupid to say that. The reality is you were giving your whole fleet HIV, which is the virus that causes AIDS. You can't just give your fleet AIDS. It doesn't work like that and your EVE FC is a degenerate farking retard for suggesting otherwise.


Still, that's a fleet's worth of buttsecks or heroin needles.
 
2014-04-14 04:49:34 PM

toraque: ObscureNameHere: Best online trash talk response I saw in World of Tanks:

[OtherTeamGuy]: "You guys are gonna get ass-raped!"

[OurTeamGuy]: "Your're Mom bought a strap-on?"

Best one I've had in WoT was this.  I'm in clan OOPS, so my name looks like 'Toraque[OOPS]'

Dipshiat: "Oops?  That's the name I have for my dog."
Me: "What a coincidence!  Dog is the name I have for your mom."


Me: "Probably because anything with more than four letters would be too hard for you to spell"
 
2014-04-14 04:51:00 PM

elchupacabra: Weatherkiss: LoneDoggie: My Eve FC told me I was a stupid fark retard and I was giving the whole fleet AIDS just because I broadcast for armor instead of shields.  And did I cry?  no........

Your EVE FC was pretty farking stupid to say that. The reality is you were giving your whole fleet HIV, which is the virus that causes AIDS. You can't just give your fleet AIDS. It doesn't work like that and your EVE FC is a degenerate farking retard for suggesting otherwise.

Still, that's a fleet's worth of buttsecks or heroin needles.


Buggering is one of the navy's oldest traditions along with rum and the flog. I can't imagine such thing not going into space with the rest of humanity.
 
2014-04-14 04:53:07 PM

Abuse Liability: GloomCookie613: Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.

I am a female, play with female avatars, and then get told there's no way I'm a girl because my voice isn't girly enough. When I play with male avatars I get told I sound like a biatch because they assume I'm a dude. Just can't effing win!

We call this the 13-year old boy effect.  I've seriously had trouble differentiating girls from some younger men.  The maturity level usually corrects the problem.  Usually only takes about 30 seconds of actual conversation to sort them.


Honestly, I've seen all types: The fawners, the haters, the quest-time masturbators, and the normal folks that just want to play the game. "Mute" is a beautiful thing sometimes. Usually it's those of the undescended testes that argue that I can't be a girl and usually after I've kicked their asses or done well. I think, maybe, it's a case of being butthurt by being beaten by a girl so if they pretend I'm a teenage guy like them, they're still manly men in their minds. Regardless, that crap is why I rarely talk with other players and online game a lot less. That crap gets old after awhile and ruins the whole experience.

/You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...
 
2014-04-14 04:57:01 PM

llortcM_yllort: Aidan: I have avoided any kind of interaction with other players on the vast majority of games I play because of this (and I avoid MMOs on the whole for this and other reasons). However I did actually find a tiny little MMO that I enjoy playing where almost all the people on the server are actually... Normal. No slurs, very little douchebaggery of any kind, and when it does happen, people just talk around the person doing it.

I like it, but it's so different from my experience that I'm always a bit weirded out by how... nice it all is...

That's how I felt about MechWarrior Online.


And how I still feel about Titanfall. I came expecting the juvenile COD crowd, and instead I got either pure politeness, or silence.
 
2014-04-14 05:00:34 PM
As far as I know I've never been online ..
 
2014-04-14 05:01:44 PM

GloomCookie613: /You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...



I'm amused by people who say they've farked my mom. Telling them they should consider going to the clinic for some blood tests usually slows them down. I once tried "Oh, you must be the one she told me about. Her nickname for you was 'Tiny'," but that just made the person worse.
 
2014-04-14 05:16:17 PM

GloomCookie613: Abuse Liability: GloomCookie613: Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.

I am a female, play with female avatars, and then get told there's no way I'm a girl because my voice isn't girly enough. When I play with male avatars I get told I sound like a biatch because they assume I'm a dude. Just can't effing win!

We call this the 13-year old boy effect.  I've seriously had trouble differentiating girls from some younger men.  The maturity level usually corrects the problem.  Usually only takes about 30 seconds of actual conversation to sort them.

Honestly, I've seen all types: The fawners, the haters, the quest-time masturbators, and the normal folks that just want to play the game. "Mute" is a beautiful thing sometimes. Usually it's those of the undescended testes that argue that I can't be a girl and usually after I've kicked their asses or done well. I think, maybe, it's a case of being butthurt by being beaten by a girl so if they pretend I'm a teenage guy like them, they're still manly men in their minds. Regardless, that crap is why I rarely talk with other players and online game a lot less. That crap gets old after awhile and ruins the whole experience.

/You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...


Yeah, I know a few guys who really rage about being out DPS'd by a girl in a raid or think that one of our spots belongs to them because we're only giving the girl a token spot. Even funnier are morons who are actually able to pull high DPS, but can't seem to avoid fight mechanics and rail against both guys and girls that understand being alive is more valuable than pulling high DPS and dying early.
 
2014-04-14 05:23:06 PM

cgraves67: Cytokine Storm: Smeggy Smurf: Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.

I play broads because if I have to look at a running ass it's going to be a nice ass

I do this in single player games, but in MMOs I stopped.  Got too annoying/weird to have random players assume I was a girl and treat me as such.  Not negative treatment, they'd just gave me far more attention than my male players ever received.  I didn't realize how many players still assume that female avatar = female gamer.

That happened to me too. Random strangers would lavish me with gifts. It was creepy.

I do recall, humorously, that a female elf I played with one time ended up being a guy with a thick Texas drawl.


I've had this happen in reverse; I'm a guy playing a guy; yet I meet dozens of people who cannot be dissuaded from the notion I'm a girl playing a guy character. Bizzare.
 
2014-04-14 05:24:59 PM
To do a team right, you have to be there for the full match, or series of matches, or raid, etc.

But now I find I have gaming time in small, irregular chunks. If the wife or kids need help, I'm disconnecting -right then.

So, because I don't want to mess up other people's games, I tend to stick to single player. That's why I'm disillusioned with games like MWO and Titanfall.

Games with no single player feel incomplete. I know I'm a single data point, but I will never buy another pvp only game.
 
2014-04-14 05:31:51 PM

Private_Citizen: To do a team right, you have to be there for the full match, or series of matches, or raid, etc.

But now I find I have gaming time in small, irregular chunks. If the wife or kids need help, I'm disconnecting -right then.

So, because I don't want to mess up other people's games, I tend to stick to single player. That's why I'm disillusioned with games like MWO and Titanfall.

Games with no single player feel incomplete. I know I'm a single data point, but I will never buy another pvp only game.


I'm in the same boat.   I play an MMO, but I don't group much, and if I pvp it's a PUG and as long as you aren't AFK-ing, you're fine.  Hit the level cap though in Rift and since you need to group up to progress, well, I'm playing it less.

FTL, Path of Exile for the Diablo fix (don't like D3 even with the new patch removing the AH), Skyrim.

I also got the platformer Humble Bundle a few weeks back, that's been loads of fun (mostly).
 
2014-04-14 05:35:37 PM

PunGent: Abuse Liability: meat0918: Avoid the general chat, don't take anything personally and you'll be fine.  Join a guild that caters to new players, they exist.

Rift's /4 is almost as bad as WoW's Barrens' chat.  The discussions between factions are bad since the factions share a general chat on PvE servers.

In the past I've seen multiple secret service worthy threats on Rift when they first went F2P. Not for a while though, as they tend to get banned really, REALLY quickly.   We just have the run of the mill people bragging about their drug use, and random conspiracy theories now.

Path of Exile's chat is a cesspool though....

You could have stopped at PVE.  Once people no longer have respect for you, your opinion no longer carries any weight.

Eh, PvE is sometimes relaxing.  PvP in games with levels tends to be retarded.  Yay, I stomped a level 23 with my level 34...I rule!!!  And being on the other end of that is just annoying.

If you want REAL PvP, play Battleground Europe.

/farking Stukas

/real men don't need levels or health potions


SWTOR does this pretty well. In PvP battlegrounds, everyone's intrinsic stats are boosted to the same level, so lvl 15s can compete with lvl 28s. You don't have all the leveled abilities, which is the reason to level, but the stats are pretty well equalized.
 
2014-04-14 05:45:27 PM

I May Be Crazy But...: GloomCookie613: /You farked my mom, huh?
//That's cool. She gets lonely sometimes.
///I just hope your dick isn't as small as your daddy's...


I'm amused by people who say they've farked my mom. Telling them they should consider going to the clinic for some blood tests usually slows them down. I once tried "Oh, you must be the one she told me about. Her nickname for you was 'Tiny'," but that just made the person worse.


Pretend to burst out crying and sob, "MY MOM'S DEAD YOU ASSfark!" Last time I did that the kid stumbled all over himself to apologize until I told him I was just farking with him. Yes, I am an evil biatch sometimes.
 
2014-04-14 05:55:06 PM

Superjew: Louisiana_Sitar_Club: [img.fark.net image 457x657]

That's hilarious!!!!  How did you find that photo of me?

Back on topic: Videogames were invented so people could have fun WITHOUT HAVING TO FIND SOMEBODY ELSE TO PLAY WITH.  Stop ruining them by making having friends mandatory.  You don't need to be old to appreciate the benefits of not having to deal with other people.


Sorry, couldn't resist.
I do agree with you to a point.  I really like a good multiplayer game but I'm a little sad if there's no single player component.  It's not a deal breaker for me but I do like a single player experience.  However, gaming is always evolving and I think saying that games "should be this" or "shouldn't be that" invites stagnation.
 
2014-04-14 06:05:07 PM
Just learn how to counter troll and quit being a biatch.

/The best advice you could possibly receive for joini the world of online gaming
 
2014-04-14 06:09:28 PM
As usual, the problem with online games is that people suck. Well... that and so many online games are such huge farking time sinks. If I want another full time job, I'll find something that pays, thanks.

Caffienatedjedi: I online game to own scrubs, unless I am milsimming. Most satisfying feeling is being accused of hacker due to your level of skill.


BOOM! HEADSHOT!
 
2014-04-14 06:13:08 PM

GloomCookie613: Pretend to burst out crying and sob, "MY MOM'S DEAD YOU ASSfark!" Last time I did that the kid stumbled all over himself to apologize until I told him I was just farking with him. Yes, I am an evil biatch sometimes.


Oh sure, how like a woman. You'll just start crying at anything, won't you?

That's impressive that it worked, and I bet it was hilarious.
 
2014-04-14 06:16:03 PM
Handily, the new Foamy cartoon is about gamer chicks:

(kinda NSFW, primarily for language, for those unfamiliar with squirrely wrath)

http://illwillpress.com/GAMECHICKS.html
 
2014-04-14 06:47:03 PM

pute kisses like a man: since then, I've noticed in 3rd person views, female characters are often smaller, which means you see more of the game


That's another aspect I never took into consideration, but when there's a slider for height, I always use the tiny ones.

noitsnot: This was the deal in Quake / Quakeworld - the female model was harder to see if far down a corridor, or camping in a shadow, etc.


All the same rules of perception apply in video games, the bigger it is, the easier it is to see or notice motion(in the more modern realistic shooters(ie where there's wilderness and ruins.. a lot of it is about noticing motion).

That's one thing I dug about some of the(previous) CoD's, you can hide in bushes and such, as long as you're not moving much.

/much more realistic than, say, the early Halo's.
//Yeah, CoD sucks, but I like that I can play it the way I would paintball in the woods, when I was less of a lazy bastard
///Also, just started playing MW2 online again on xbox, so it's on the brain.

As to online community, fark that, xbox has "friends only" for an option.  No fuss, no muss.
 
2014-04-14 06:47:48 PM
Oh, whatever, trolls are hilarious! Hint: Trolls only fark with stupid people.
 
2014-04-14 06:53:42 PM
DOTA and other MOBA communities are the absolute worst. LoL's gotten better thanks to the tribunal and them dropping the banhammer on some of the most toxic players, but its still not great. The origonal DOTA mod for WCIII though...

"You're mother should have aborted you"
"You are literally worse then Hitler. You should kill yourself. Right now. I'm being serious."
"Quit being such a Jew or I'll gas you."
"Nibong, quit. Your crack baby mama needs you."
"I WILL TRACK YOUR IP RAPE AND KILL YOU YOU!"

Lets just say that it not the most welcoming of communities to new players.
 
2014-04-14 07:03:23 PM

Duane Dibbley: walktoanarcade: There's no way in Bowser's lava I would have been able to beat Ninja Gaiden back in 1989 had some farktwit been screaming unfunny yo mamma jokes randomly into my ear.

In fact, back in the 1980s and '90s, such behavior was grounds for a punch in the face. We took our gaming fairly seriously back then too.

Gaming wasn't serious. Games were fun. Deciding what games to spend limited pocket money on was serious. (Thank you Mastertronic, Gremlin and Firebird). Arguing over ZX Spectrum v. Commodore 64 v. Amstrad CPC* or Amiga v. Atari ST** was serious. But when you actually sat down to play the games, that was pure joy.

* Commodore of course. Legendary game music and if you had a disc drive you could play astonishing and ambitious disc-only games as well as the ones ported to or from the others.


**Amiga by a nose.


Spot on.

Summer games on C64 was epic.  The whole freaking neighborhood showed up to see who could win and break another joystick.
 
2014-04-14 07:19:49 PM
i'm probably alone in that i never got that annoyed by other people shiatting up online game voice chat

nowadays it's dead-silent, you could be fighting AI
 
2014-04-14 07:36:42 PM

pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult


Some kid once got so mad be ended up accusing me of sleeping with HIS mom
 
2014-04-14 09:06:29 PM

evilmrsock: pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult

take it up the arse like a man you farking pussy-farker.


Sleeping with women is for poofs.
 
2014-04-14 09:09:40 PM
I left my wife because of her mmophfommopho gaming addiction. Didn't mind her playing, but I did mind her talking all night long.

I listened to half a conversation for four months.
 
2014-04-14 09:14:29 PM

Fugitive Unknown: DOTA and other MOBA communities are the absolute worst. LoL's gotten better thanks to the tribunal and them dropping the banhammer on some of the most toxic players, but its still not great. The origonal DOTA mod for WCIII though...

"You're mother should have aborted you"
"You are literally worse then Hitler. You should kill yourself. Right now. I'm being serious."
"Quit being such a Jew or I'll gas you."
"Nibong, quit. Your crack baby mama needs you."
"I WILL TRACK YOUR IP RAPE AND KILL YOU YOU!"

Lets just say that it not the most welcoming of communities to new players.


I remember getting those sort of messages.  Although, the people who threatened me tended to have worse spelling.
 
2014-04-14 09:42:25 PM
I don't always like online gaming with communication. Sometimes it's fun to be a ninja. Like in Demon Souls when you could gank other players in their own game.
 
2014-04-14 11:36:27 PM

Fast Moon: This is why I and most of my female friends tend to choose male avatars when we play MMOs.  People leave you alone, and you don't look like a trollop.


I like the male tauren in World of Warcraft solely because if you let him stand around long enough he scratches his arse. Every time I see it I giggle.

/Female.
//Totally mature and stuff.
 
2014-04-15 06:46:31 AM

Jekylman: PunGent: Abuse Liability: meat0918: Avoid the general chat, don't take anything personally and you'll be fine.  Join a guild that caters to new players, they exist.

Rift's /4 is almost as bad as WoW's Barrens' chat.  The discussions between factions are bad since the factions share a general chat on PvE servers.

In the past I've seen multiple secret service worthy threats on Rift when they first went F2P. Not for a while though, as they tend to get banned really, REALLY quickly.   We just have the run of the mill people bragging about their drug use, and random conspiracy theories now.

Path of Exile's chat is a cesspool though....

You could have stopped at PVE.  Once people no longer have respect for you, your opinion no longer carries any weight.

Eh, PvE is sometimes relaxing.  PvP in games with levels tends to be retarded.  Yay, I stomped a level 23 with my level 34...I rule!!!  And being on the other end of that is just annoying.

If you want REAL PvP, play Battleground Europe.

/farking Stukas

/real men don't need levels or health potions

SWTOR does this pretty well. In PvP battlegrounds, everyone's intrinsic stats are boosted to the same level, so lvl 15s can compete with lvl 28s. You don't have all the leveled abilities, which is the reason to level, but the stats are pretty well equalized.


Played it for a bit, and it wasn't bad, but seemed kinda pointless at the end of the day.  Force-lightning sniping was kinda fun, though :)
 
2014-04-15 09:24:27 AM

PunGent: Jekylman: PunGent: Abuse Liability: meat0918: Avoid the general chat, don't take anything personally and you'll be fine.  Join a guild that caters to new players, they exist.

Rift's /4 is almost as bad as WoW's Barrens' chat.  The discussions between factions are bad since the factions share a general chat on PvE servers.

In the past I've seen multiple secret service worthy threats on Rift when they first went F2P. Not for a while though, as they tend to get banned really, REALLY quickly.   We just have the run of the mill people bragging about their drug use, and random conspiracy theories now.

Path of Exile's chat is a cesspool though....

You could have stopped at PVE.  Once people no longer have respect for you, your opinion no longer carries any weight.

Eh, PvE is sometimes relaxing.  PvP in games with levels tends to be retarded.  Yay, I stomped a level 23 with my level 34...I rule!!!  And being on the other end of that is just annoying.

If you want REAL PvP, play Battleground Europe.

/farking Stukas

/real men don't need levels or health potions

SWTOR does this pretty well. In PvP battlegrounds, everyone's intrinsic stats are boosted to the same level, so lvl 15s can compete with lvl 28s. You don't have all the leveled abilities, which is the reason to level, but the stats are pretty well equalized.

Played it for a bit, and it wasn't bad, but seemed kinda pointless at the end of the day.  Force-lightning sniping was kinda fun, though :)


SWTOR fun:
1: roll an imperial.
2: cruise through tutorial planet Korriban.
3: land on hub planet Dromund Kaas.
4: in genchat, type the name of a movie, tv show, book or song. Replace one word with "jawa".
5: profit!
 
2014-04-15 02:38:46 PM

gaspode: pute kisses like a man: charlesmartel11235: god I mean if you're offended by racism, sexism and homophobia why are you even playing online videogames?

once i was called a farking pussy-farker.

/ not really sure if it was a sexist heterophobic statement, or a very naive 13 year old's pre-pubescent attempts at insult

Some kid once got so mad be ended up accusing me of sleeping with HIS mom


i just like to say:

See, THIS is what happens when you find a stranger in the ALPS!!!
 
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