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(Daily Mail)   If you've ever fantasized about getting spanked by Kate Upton, you may wanna think again... and not in that way   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 69
    More: Scary, Captain Kate, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Peaches Geldof, Mallrats, urban explorers, Cameron Diaz, other woman, gummi bear  
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9478 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 11 Apr 2014 at 10:25 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



69 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-04-11 07:34:23 PM  
But anyone hoping to see the scene will be disappointed - it was cut from the final film.

All that bruising for nothing.
 
2014-04-11 07:43:54 PM  
Too far...or a job well done??
 
2014-04-11 08:02:53 PM  
As long as she didn't chop off his sword hand
 
2014-04-11 08:29:47 PM  
It would be worth it.
 
2014-04-11 08:38:07 PM  
No no no .. That just made it SO much better.

Kate..

Call me?
 
2014-04-11 08:44:02 PM  
*WANT*
 
2014-04-11 09:19:26 PM  
Too high up on the buttocks to be safe.  A little more to the right and she could have hit the coccyx.

/no higher than one handbreadth from the top of the cleft, just to be sure
 
2014-04-11 10:02:04 PM  
She can bruise my face with those tittaes!
 
2014-04-11 10:10:32 PM  
So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.
 
2014-04-11 10:29:53 PM  
Verlander will be on the IR most of this season.
 
2014-04-11 10:42:02 PM  
For all the times I spanked it to her, it would only be fair.
 
2014-04-11 10:43:03 PM  

AlHarris31: As long as she didn't chop off his sword hand


That move is called "The Super Stranger"
 
2014-04-11 10:45:25 PM  

leevis: It would be worth it.


Hell, if I had a bruise from Kate Upton spanking me, I'd show it off to everybody I meet.
 
2014-04-11 11:12:51 PM  
My ex beat me with a boat oar. I've had enough of that shiat.
 
2014-04-11 11:15:11 PM  
Sounds like the director is a real asshat.
 
2014-04-11 11:58:15 PM  

Miss Stein: Too high up on the buttocks to be safe.  A little more to the right and she could have hit the coccyx.

/no higher than one handbreadth from the top of the cleft, just to be sure



How u doin?
 
2014-04-11 11:59:27 PM  

Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.


NSFW
 
2014-04-12 12:39:54 AM  
Yes spankings for everyone, and then the oral sex.
 
2014-04-12 12:43:02 AM  

Oldiron_79: Yes spankings for everyone, and then the oral sex.


Ok. We'll be right over.
 
2014-04-12 12:52:41 AM  
Her spanking of that dude is nothing compared to the spankings I've given my monkey while thinking of her.
 
2014-04-12 12:54:44 AM  
My first words to her would have been "if you're really sorry, kiss it and make it better..."
 
2014-04-12 12:55:11 AM  

Oldiron_79: Yes spankings for everyone, and then the oral sex.


Sounds perilous.
 
2014-04-12 12:57:26 AM  
Oh, he'll have his revenge. A Lanister always pays his debts.
 
2014-04-12 01:01:30 AM  

Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: NSFW


Dumpy girl setting on a horse.
/tone up Kate.
//remember how quick they turned on Christina Hendricks
 
2014-04-12 01:16:32 AM  
She's hot and all, but time in the gym would do her a lot of good.
 
2014-04-12 01:26:32 AM  

Kurmudgeon: Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: NSFW

Dumpy girl setting on a horse.
/tone up Kate.
//remember how quick they turned on Christina Hendricks


I notice you didn't mention her sharp knees.
 
2014-04-12 01:33:54 AM  
Kurmudgeon:
//remember how quick they turned on Christina Hendricks

"They" weren't straight men.
 
2014-04-12 01:37:55 AM  
Kate Upton's popularity confuses me, she's just average. I see plenty of women who look just as good or better in a bikini whenever I go to the beach. How does she have a modelling career?
 
2014-04-12 01:47:37 AM  
If anything that makes me more interested.

/Bruises just mean you had a fun night
//Bruises on your ass are instant flashbacks whenever you sit down
 
2014-04-12 01:52:53 AM  

rynthetyn: Kate Upton's popularity confuses me, she's just average. I see plenty of women who look just as good or better in a bikini whenever I go to the beach. How does she have a modelling career?


Dem titties?
 
2014-04-12 02:09:13 AM  

Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.

NSFW


What a fatty.
 
2014-04-12 02:21:12 AM  
"I notice you didn't mention her sharp knees."

Because you couldn't see them under her hanging gut.
 
2014-04-12 02:27:54 AM  
CigaretteSmokingMan Kurmudgeon

Don't let it get to you boys. Before you know it there will be another article about Keira Knightly or some other anorexic drag queen. You'll be alright.
 
2014-04-12 02:31:44 AM  
eCurmudgeon: Oldiron_79: Yes spankings for everyone, and then the oral sex.

Sounds perilous.


Can't I have a little peril?
 
2014-04-12 02:33:49 AM  
Studman 69: On the internet, chicks like this are well below his standards. In real life, he'll take anyone of either gender who'll go back to his parents' house.

img.fark.net
 
2014-04-12 02:35:52 AM  

rynthetyn: Kate Upton's popularity confuses me, she's just average. I see plenty of women who look just as good or better in a bikini whenever I go to the beach. How does she have a modelling career?


I still think she'll be hotter when she's older.  Course, she might prove me wrong.
 
2014-04-12 02:57:14 AM  

CigaretteSmokingMan: Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.

NSFW

What a fatty.


More cushion for the pushin'?

Really though, I like a girl with a little meat.  Not an excess of meat, but enough that if we roll around in bed I don't feel like I'm gonna crush her on accident.
 
2014-04-12 03:13:34 AM  

Alphax: rynthetyn: Kate Upton's popularity confuses me, she's just average. I see plenty of women who look just as good or better in a bikini whenever I go to the beach. How does she have a modelling career?

I still think she'll be hotter when she's older.  Course, she might prove me wrong.


Breasts that size don't always age especially well. Gravity becomes an unkind master...
 
2014-04-12 03:15:40 AM  

DrBenway: Alphax: rynthetyn: Kate Upton's popularity confuses me, she's just average. I see plenty of women who look just as good or better in a bikini whenever I go to the beach. How does she have a modelling career?

I still think she'll be hotter when she's older.  Course, she might prove me wrong.

Breasts that size don't always age especially well. Gravity becomes an unkind master...


She seems to have some baby fat to lose still.  A bit of firming up would help her.
 
2014-04-12 04:11:05 AM  
yukichigai:

Really though, I like a girl with a little meat.  Not an excess of meat, but enough that if we roll around in bed I don't feel like I'm gonna crush her on accident.

Crushing her is just one problem. There is something really depressing about banging a chick doggy style and felling nothing but bone every time you slam against her. Just as depressing is reaching down to grab some ass and ending up just pinching the skin covering her pancake ass. She would need one hell of a pair of tits to compensate, and at least Kate has that. With the other models it's all skin and bone.
 
2014-04-12 07:48:42 AM  

Oldiron_79: eCurmudgeon: Oldiron_79: Yes spankings for everyone, and then the oral sex.

Sounds perilous.

Can't I have a little peril?


No, it's too perilous.
 
2014-04-12 08:54:33 AM  
*cracks knuckles*

Ok, here we go:

img.fark.net img.fark.net

img.fark.net img.fark.net
 
2014-04-12 09:08:28 AM  
I have mixed emotions on this.  Am I jealous?  Is it envy?  Is it sadness or anger that she didn't do the scene with me?  Mixed emotions, I tell ya'!
 
2014-04-12 10:04:22 AM  
My fantasies about her usually just involve titty f*cking.
 
2014-04-12 10:32:26 AM  
Ah, yes, the typical Studman rationalizing going on. She's a beautiful woman with sex appeal. You don't have to put a ring on it, just don't act like you wouldn't bury your face any place on her body she told you to.
 
2014-04-12 01:57:54 PM  
mother of allah!
 
2014-04-12 02:08:22 PM  

yukichigai: CigaretteSmokingMan: Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.

NSFW

What a fatty.

More cushion for the pushin'?

Really though, I like a girl with a little meat.  Not an excess of meat, but enough that if we roll around in bed I don't feel like I'm gonna crush her on accident.


Not attacking you personally, but I love it when people on Fark say that they would break the bag of antlers by sneezing or some other thing.

I envision that most of them are 300+lbs and have a legit argument, or they look like DJ Qualls themselves and have no basis to say anything.
 
2014-04-12 02:17:37 PM  

fatalvenom: yukichigai: CigaretteSmokingMan: Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.

NSFW

What a fatty.

More cushion for the pushin'?

Really though, I like a girl with a little meat.  Not an excess of meat, but enough that if we roll around in bed I don't feel like I'm gonna crush her on accident.

Not attacking you personally, but I love it when people on Fark say that they would break the bag of antlers by sneezing or some other thing.

I envision that most of them are 300+lbs and have a legit argument, or they look like DJ Qualls themselves and have no basis to say anything.


I don't like super skinny chicks either and I'm in pretty good shape. It's just not sexy for me to see bones and no curves, but to each his own. I actually like it when people like things I don't like, less demand for my stuff then.

Sadly I'm not a chubby chaser, those guys have it made.
 
2014-04-12 02:26:10 PM  

nocturnal001: fatalvenom: yukichigai: CigaretteSmokingMan: Harbinger of the Doomed Rat: Mugato: So when is she finally going to make with the rack? I guess you don't show all your cards right away.

NSFW

What a fatty.

More cushion for the pushin'?

Really though, I like a girl with a little meat.  Not an excess of meat, but enough that if we roll around in bed I don't feel like I'm gonna crush her on accident.

Not attacking you personally, but I love it when people on Fark say that they would break the bag of antlers by sneezing or some other thing.

I envision that most of them are 300+lbs and have a legit argument, or they look like DJ Qualls themselves and have no basis to say anything.

I don't like super skinny chicks either and I'm in pretty good shape. It's just not sexy for me to see bones and no curves, but to each his own. I actually like it when people like things I don't like, less demand for my stuff then.

Sadly I'm not a chubby chaser, those guys have it made.


I like a good sexy bag of antlers so long as she doesn't look anorexic. A toned chick with a nice ass and B-C cups works for me.

However, I do have a thing for chicks that have some cushion. My GF isn't a bag of antlers, but I'm still able to appreciate one when it is appealing.
 
2014-04-12 02:30:48 PM  
Blister is coming?
 
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