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(Lincolnshire Echo)   You're a jerk for burgling your ex-girlfriend's flat. You're an even bigger jerk for making her stand in her underwear on her own balcony while you're doing it   (lincolnshireecho.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, balcony, girlfriend, suspended sentence  
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6884 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2014 at 12:43 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



52 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2014-04-11 11:43:30 AM  
No pics?
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-04-11 12:24:24 PM  
Was it a slightly chilly night, with the light falling at a shallow angle across her body making every curve or bump cast a conspicuous shadow? I need a mental image here. Help me out, so-called reporter.
 
2014-04-11 12:33:16 PM  
"After she returned inside he forced her to cut up her own clothes,"

I don't why this makes me think of the humiliating punishments Archer doles out.
 
2014-04-11 12:38:56 PM  

EvilEgg: I don't why this makes me think of the humiliating punishments Archer doles out.


Because that is exactly what Sterling Archer would do to Woodhouse.
 
2014-04-11 12:39:48 PM  
Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.
 
2014-04-11 12:40:58 PM  
Broken glass, broke and hungry
Broken hearts and broken bones
This is where we used to live...
 
2014-04-11 12:45:44 PM  
At least he isn't a pervert.
 
2014-04-11 12:46:52 PM  

Somacandra: Because that is exactly what Sterling Archer would do to Woodhouse.



Honestly, how hard is it to poach a goddamn egg.
 
2014-04-11 12:49:02 PM  
I just like the articles headline "Boston man David Dewberry given suspended sentence after forcing ex-partner to stand on balcony in underwear while he burgled her flat"

Ha I'm sure he "burgled her flat" alright.
 
2014-04-11 12:49:47 PM  
What did she do to him to make him act like that?
 
2014-04-11 12:52:15 PM  
Sounds like a set up for some hot role playing. Time to call the wife...

/she said no
 
2014-04-11 12:54:28 PM  
I'll be the judge if she's flat or not.
 
2014-04-11 12:54:49 PM  

JesusJuice: What did she do to him to make him act like that?


she couldn;t pach an egg...seriously, it's like cooking 101
 
2014-04-11 12:58:08 PM  
Does that make you more of a jerk?  I think it's preferable to a stabbing, or even being hotties in the  closet during the burgling
 
2014-04-11 12:58:28 PM  
And that's all I need ...
www.simplyseleta.com
 
2014-04-11 12:58:42 PM  
a1.s6img.com
 
2014-04-11 12:58:53 PM  

Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.


WTF?.. according to the side article, they put 3 guys in jail for beating down a ginger, but they wouldn't jail abusive ex-boyfriend burglar??!
 
2014-04-11 12:59:16 PM  

Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.


At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.
 
2014-04-11 01:00:06 PM  

TheOther: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

WTF?.. according to the side article, they put 3 guys in jail for beating down a ginger, but they wouldn't jail abusive ex-boyfriend burglar??!


Maybe he is or knows a DuPont.
 
2014-04-11 01:01:50 PM  
Sounds like he's either very wealthy himself, or has wealthy, connected parents.
 
2014-04-11 01:02:07 PM  
thesocietypages.org
 
2014-04-11 01:08:02 PM  

JesusJuice: What did she do to him to make him act like that?


Oh right, his insanity must be *her* fault.

/they're just asking for it, wearing lipstick and slutty dresses that go above the knee
 
2014-04-11 01:08:31 PM  
i1182.photobucket.com
 
2014-04-11 01:09:12 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2014-04-11 01:10:12 PM  
weirdestboner.jpg
 
2014-04-11 01:10:16 PM  
Ya know, it occurs to me that this wouldn't have been a big deal if it had happened at Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
 
2014-04-11 01:10:37 PM  

Inflatable Rhetoric: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.


Male judge who thinks this was just a "one-off." Probably gave the defendant a knowing nod while saying that.
 
2014-04-11 01:13:32 PM  

brimed03: JesusJuice: What did she do to him to make him act like that?

Oh right, his insanity must be *her* fault.

/they're just asking for it, wearing lipstick and slutty dresses that go above the knee


She texted another guy.
 
2014-04-11 01:15:53 PM  
I thought it was robbery if the person was present.
 
2014-04-11 01:17:35 PM  
Women are typically depicted smashing or throwing stuff at their "long term partner's" in these type of scenarios, but if a man does it, suddenly it is a crime? Farking sexists.

Men are often depicted in movies or TV shows being thrown out in their underwear or nude out of their "long term partner's" house. But if the roles are reversed, this is suddenly wrong?
 
2014-04-11 01:33:39 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: I thought it was robbery if the person was present.


I guess her being "present" is up for debate.
 
2014-04-11 01:34:51 PM  
Yeah, be a gentleman, make her stand on MY balcony in her underwear.
 
2014-04-11 01:37:35 PM  

brimed03: Inflatable Rhetoric: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.

Male judge who thinks this was just a "one-off." Probably gave the defendant a knowing nod while saying that.


You're a very angry woman, aren't you?
 
2014-04-11 01:37:35 PM  

Inflatable Rhetoric: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.


I think the fact that he stole the key and came back the next day and did this warrants at least 90 days in jail.
 
2014-04-11 01:52:22 PM  
At least he didn't try to sell her encyclopedias
 
2014-04-11 01:57:59 PM  
sentenced...to attend a Building Better Relationship programme

I've never been through one of those programs, but apparently they cover a much wider range of topics than I'd expected.
 
2014-04-11 02:42:06 PM  
Real version: he went over to get some things, she went out to the balcony in her underwear to scream about him, he grab his stuff and left, she damaged her own crap, and now he will have to buy her new stuff.
 
2014-04-11 02:44:56 PM  
Robbery and assault and all he got was a stern talking to. That's the kind of punishment you give a 5 year old kid who smacked his sister and took her Barbie doll, not an adult.

/guy should be sent to his room and by that I mean jail
 
2014-04-11 02:45:28 PM  

Bullseyed: Women are typically depicted smashing or throwing stuff at their "long term partner's" in these type of scenarios, but if a man does it, suddenly it is a crime? Farking sexists.

Men are often depicted in movies or TV shows being thrown out in their underwear or nude out of their "long term partner's" house. But if the roles are reversed, this is suddenly wrong?


...so who exactly is your gripe with here?
 
2014-04-11 02:51:41 PM  
But the judge instead imposed a 12-month jail sentence suspended for two years and ordered Dewberry, who pleaded guilty to burglary, assault and causing criminal damage, to attend a Building Better Relationship programme.

I don't care who you are, that's funny right there.
 
2014-04-11 02:58:19 PM  
The scary/sad thing is they found him in a hotel with another woman after the crime took place. That other woman should be thinking it is a good time to "Run, run far away!" from this guy.
 
2014-04-11 03:10:18 PM  
Dear Penthouse, so I stopped by my ex-girlfriends house last night...
 
2014-04-11 03:16:13 PM  

MechaPyx: Robbery and assault and all he got was a stern talking to. That's the kind of punishment you give a 5 year old kid who smacked his sister and took her Barbie doll, not an adult.

/guy should be sent to his room and by that I mean jail


He'll be back.  The judge will stick it to him next time.  Next time for sure, Rocky.
 
2014-04-11 03:33:12 PM  
But the judge instead imposed a 12-month jail sentence suspended for two years and ordered Dewberry, who pleaded guilty to burglary, assault and causing criminal damage, to attend a Building Better Relationship programme.

Why is it that everyone's first thought is how this guy is some kind of asshole for doing this? Judging from some of the women I've known in my life, I can think of plenty of reasons a guy would be justified in doing something along these lines.
 
2014-04-11 04:03:33 PM  

brimed03: Inflatable Rhetoric: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.

Male judge who thinks this was just a "one-off." Probably gave the defendant a knowing nod while saying that.


Maybe she had it coming.
 
2014-04-11 04:21:02 PM  

Bullseyed: Men are often depicted in movies or TV shows being thrown out in their underwear or nude out of their "long term partner's" house.


Or fleeing their "long term partner's" house in their underwear or nude because their "long term partner's" "long term partner" has come home...
 
2014-04-11 04:46:10 PM  

ReapTheChaos: But the judge instead imposed a 12-month jail sentence suspended for two years and ordered Dewberry, who pleaded guilty to burglary, assault and causing criminal damage, to attend a Building Better Relationship programme.

Why is it that everyone's first thought is how this guy is some kind of asshole for doing this? Judging from some of the women I've known in my life, I can think of plenty of reasons a guy would be justified in doing something along these lines.


Be sure to mention that to the judge.
 
2014-04-11 07:56:12 PM  

gajillion: brimed03: Inflatable Rhetoric: Somacandra: Suspended sentence for all of that? That's bullshiat. At least 90 days in jail, at least.

At least.  This "He's learned his lesson, etc, he's sorry, etc..." is bullsh*t.  The guy's a dangerous loser.

Male judge who thinks this was just a "one-off." Probably gave the defendant a knowing nod while saying that.

You're a very angry woman, aren't you?


Oh, sorry.  Sorry.  Wrong answer.

getkinected.files.wordpress.com

Final Jeopardy: guess what "anatomy cue" you can take as to what you can go do with yourself!
 
2014-04-11 11:10:31 PM  
Why burglary instead of robbery charges?
 
2014-04-11 11:32:15 PM  

mschwenk: Why burglary instead of robbery charges?


Because he didn't rob, he burgled.
 
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