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(The New York Times)   An interesting look at the career arc of hitmen: "Everyone starts as a novice, whatever your job. You bumble around, make mistakes, learn by doing, then if not captured, move on to dilettante, journeyman and finally, the master"   (nytimes.com) divider line 131
    More: Interesting  
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7951 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Apr 2014 at 10:05 AM (23 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-10 08:56:14 AM
At what point in your career do you have a really creepy relationship with a 12 year old girl?
 
2014-04-10 08:59:44 AM
Interesting. The last part of the quote in the headline is so stealthy and skilled that you can't even see it in TFA. In fact, it almost seems like TFA is actually saying that a "dilettante" is an entirely different category of hitman all together, not a "phase" through which one passes on a "career arc." But I guess that's only what TFA article WANTS you to think, so you become complacent and thereby allow it to drive an ice pick into your skull.
 
2014-04-10 09:52:59 AM

dittybopper: At what point in your career do you have a really creepy relationship with a 12 year old girl?


and a plant.
 
2014-04-10 10:08:45 AM
....or if your good at your job you can skip straight to master in one easy step.
 
2014-04-10 10:08:56 AM
What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?
 
2014-04-10 10:13:24 AM

Ned Stark: What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?


I'm sure having been a sniper in the military would help...
 
2014-04-10 10:13:53 AM
The article reminded me of my favorite Law & Order episode where the Hitman got caught because he was walking his dog on every hit.
 
2014-04-10 10:14:51 AM
I heard from a woman last night who had mob ties thanks to get husband when she was younger. On numerous occasions, she had hitmen crash on her couch and eat breakfast at her table.

Yes, she's probably telling the truth. That's all I'll say about that.
 
2014-04-10 10:15:19 AM

lindalouwho: Ned Stark: What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?

I'm sure having been a sniper in the military would help...


What do you think this is? The Army, where you shoot 'em a mile away? You've gotta get up close like this and bada-bing, you blow their brains all over your nice Ivy League suit!
 
2014-04-10 10:15:23 AM
You have to be good in the pocket.

And know how to make a good gravy.
 
2014-04-10 10:17:27 AM
For starters, you don't just casually point your gun at a guy in the backseat of a car. You might go over a bump.
 
2014-04-10 10:17:55 AM
I knew a Salvadorian guy that was a hitman.
But I repeat myself.
 
2014-04-10 10:18:56 AM

Tom_Slick: lindalouwho: Ned Stark: What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?

I'm sure having been a sniper in the military would help...

What do you think this is? The Army, where you shoot 'em a mile away? You've gotta get up close like this and bada-bing, you blow their brains all over your nice Ivy League suit!


How's the Italian food in this restaurant?
 
2014-04-10 10:20:01 AM
I'm more interested in the workings of government and corporation-sponsored assassins than two-bit mafia thugs or bankers being blackmailed.

Of course, the author touches on this, in a way- "We only know that they exist." I'd imagine keeping your list of trained killers quiet is a high priority.
 
2014-04-10 10:20:59 AM
gameplay.pl
 
2014-04-10 10:21:20 AM
I was in the Army with a guy who put out a hit on his wife and hired another guy in our company to do it. Was going to pay him $75k with the proceeds from the life insurance policy. They were caught when the first guy he asked told the cops. We were in Iraq when this was all supposed to happen. Husband got 25 years, hitman got 20 years.
http://www.forthoodsentinel.com/story.php?id=891
I remember reading somewhere that the average price of a hit is like $5k. Doesn't seem like you can make too good of a living doing it. But the numbers may be skewed by people who offer to do hits for like $100 and a bj.
 
2014-04-10 10:21:21 AM
So, the summary of the article is:

"Hitmen start off green and gradually get better if they stay out of jail.  It's hard to write about a good hitman because they don't get caught."

Wow.  Profound.  Bravo, Malcolm Mackay.
 
2014-04-10 10:22:55 AM
Careful now - working as a hitman can lead to being a Deputy US Marshal.


img1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-04-10 10:23:11 AM

grinding_journalist: I'd imagine keeping your list of trained killers quiet is a high priority.


I'd imagine it's not very hard to do.  It's not like you can talk to your date about it.
 
2014-04-10 10:24:12 AM
First rule of hit club: Once you've decided on a killing, first you make a stone of your heart.

//working on a Police lyric trifecta today, off to the Politics tab!
 
2014-04-10 10:25:55 AM
At what point do you look at your resume and say "You know what? I could use a change of career", and decide on hitman?

And what do you tell, say, people on the golf course when they ask you what you do for a living? "Oh, odd jobs. By the way, if you ever need some discrete work done, here's my card."
 
2014-04-10 10:27:45 AM

Gonz


At what point do you look at your resume and say "You know what? I could use a change of career", and decide on hitman?

And what do you tell, say, people on the golf course when they ask you what you do for a living? "Oh, odd jobs. By the way, if you ever need some discrete work done, here's my card."


And then you seal the deal by throwing your hat and cutting the head off a statue.


PS "discreet"
 
2014-04-10 10:28:35 AM

Tom_Slick: The article reminded me of my favorite Law & Order episode where the Hitman got caught because he was walking his dog on every hit.


I loved that one. They were always so much better with Jerry Orbach.
 
2014-04-10 10:28:55 AM
Crime doesn't pay, but the hours are nice.
 
2014-04-10 10:29:06 AM

Molavian: grinding_journalist: I'd imagine keeping your list of trained killers quiet is a high priority.

I'd imagine it's not very hard to do.  It's not like you can talk to your date about it.


Yeah,that's really more Facebook material.
 
2014-04-10 10:29:45 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: Gonz

At what point do you look at your resume and say "You know what? I could use a change of career", and decide on hitman?

And what do you tell, say, people on the golf course when they ask you what you do for a living? "Oh, odd jobs. By the way, if you ever need some discrete work done, here's my card."


And then you seal the deal by throwing your hat and cutting the head off a statue.


PS "discreet"


Well, hitman work could be thought of as "discrete". The workload isn't exactly continuous.
 
2014-04-10 10:30:35 AM

dittybopper: At what point in your career do you have a really creepy relationship with a 12 year old girl?


Dude, we're talking hitmen, not teachers.

/Yes, I get the reference.
 
2014-04-10 10:31:41 AM
And if I remember correctly from the classes I took, (never graduated) the weapon progression as you move up the ranks is as follows: Screwdriver, Scissors, Wrench, Crowbar, Bat, Pistol, Submachine Gun, Grenade, Hunting Rifle, Sniper Rifle.
 
2014-04-10 10:32:24 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: PS "discreet"


I flipped the mental coin on that one many times. And then I chose... poorly.

//Obscure?
 
2014-04-10 10:33:00 AM
If you haven't seen Cocaine Cowboys, the documentary about the Miami coke trade, do so.

Most of the violence in the entire area for years was done at the behest of a middle-aged woman...naturally, the feds set up a huge task force that never even got close to her.  She didn't fit anyone's profile.

They did, however, take credit when the homicide rate dropped...which happened because she'd moved to another city.

/another victory in the drug war
 
2014-04-10 10:34:35 AM

Decillion: And if I remember correctly from the classes I took, (never graduated) the weapon progression as you move up the ranks is as follows: Screwdriver, Scissors, Wrench, Crowbar, Bat, Pistol, Submachine Gun, Grenade, Hunting Rifle, Sniper Rifle.


You're missing the candlestick, the lead pipe, and soup cup.  No, excuse me, tea cup.
 
2014-04-10 10:34:37 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: Careful now - working as a hitman can lead to being a Deputy US Marshal.


[img1.wikia.nocookie.net image 350x240]


That movie needed more boobies. Truckloads of them.
 
2014-04-10 10:35:17 AM
Some hitmen are really booked up. One dude was like I have an opening for March 2015 and I was like whaaaaaaa??
 
2014-04-10 10:39:24 AM

lindalouwho: Ned Stark: What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?

I'm sure having been a sniper in the military would help...


Less than you might think.

Shooting a high-powered rifle in a city area is going to cause a lot of noise.   The only way around that is a silenced rifle shooting a subsonic round (like an upgunned DeLisle Carbine, perhaps*), but that's pretty much unheard (heh) outside of Hollywood movies.

Much more relevant would be things like street fighting skills, and the ability to not act like a stereotypical hitman.

*I've always thought that a barely subsonic .45-70 Government round using very heavy bullets would be very effective in something like that.
 
2014-04-10 10:39:57 AM
They should start a union. /nothing is obscure on Fark.
 
2014-04-10 10:40:28 AM
 I wonder...

...

How does one get a job as a hitman? Or anything in organized crime, for that matter?

Hell, I'd imagine most folks aren't capable of being hitmen. How does one even figure out that one could do this? Does one accidentally off someone and not get caught, then have an a-ha moment at the kitchen table one Sunday morning?

Oddly curious, I am.
 
2014-04-10 10:41:51 AM
FTA: We don't want to be hit men. We don't find them glamorous; we're repulsed by them.

Since some people become hitmen, I guess that's just not true.

Cybernetic: Well, hitman work could be thought of as "discrete". The workload isn't exactly continuous.


Math was hard - why do you keep invoking my nightmares from college?
 
2014-04-10 10:43:28 AM

Public Savant


FTA: We don't want to be hit men. We don't find them glamorous; we're repulsed by them.

Since some people become hitmen, I guess that's just not true.


Change 'hit' to 'garbage' and recompute.
 
2014-04-10 10:43:31 AM
Dilettante, journeyman, and master? He must play Warhammer Fantasy RPG.
 
2014-04-10 10:43:32 AM
Will there be meetings?

/not obscure
 
2014-04-10 10:43:52 AM

Gonz: At what point do you look at your resume and say "You know what? I could use a change of career", and decide on hitman?



You could become an art professor...

thisdistractedglobe.com
 
2014-04-10 10:44:06 AM

xaks: How does one even figure out that one could do this?


A lot of people work in complaints departments everywhere.
 
2014-04-10 10:44:57 AM

Ivandrago: I was in the Army with a guy who put out a hit on his wife and hired another guy in our company to do it. Was going to pay him $75k with the proceeds from the life insurance policy. They were caught when the first guy he asked told the cops. We were in Iraq when this was all supposed to happen. Husband got 25 years, hitman got 20 years.
http://www.forthoodsentinel.com/story.php?id=891
I remember reading somewhere that the average price of a hit is like $5k. Doesn't seem like you can make too good of a living doing it. But the numbers may be skewed by people who offer to do hits for like $100 and a bj.


He asked someone else after the first guy said no?  What a freaking moron.  Almost nobody that a non career criminal knows is willing to commit murder for hire.  Even that sketchy friend of a friend who has a rap sheet as long as his Bic pen tattooed arm?  Probably not keen to go back to jail - he'll shop you to his parole officer just to look good.   You might get some random crack head to agree to it, but once they spend your advance fee on crack they'll forget all about the "job".

Idiots.
 
2014-04-10 10:45:01 AM

Gonz: At what point do you look at your resume and say "You know what? I could use a change of career", and decide on hitman?

And what do you tell, say, people on the golf course when they ask you what you do for a living? "Oh, odd jobs. By the way, if you ever need some discrete work done, here's my card."


"What have you been doing with your life?"
"Uh... professional killer."
"Oh! Good for you, it's a... growth industry."
 
2014-04-10 10:45:35 AM

dittybopper: lindalouwho: Ned Stark: What kind of things are they looking for on your resume for hitman jobs?

I'm sure having been a sniper in the military would help...

Less than you might think.

Shooting a high-powered rifle in a city area is going to cause a lot of noise.   The only way around that is a silenced rifle shooting a subsonic round (like an upgunned DeLisle Carbine, perhaps*), but that's pretty much unheard (heh) outside of Hollywood movies.

Much more relevant would be things like street fighting skills, and the ability to not act like a stereotypical hitman.

*I've always thought that a barely subsonic .45-70 Government round using very heavy bullets would be very effective in something like that.


Yes, comment was based on movie/tv where a silencer means no sound at all.

Off to look up "subsonic round" for the heck of it.
 
2014-04-10 10:46:28 AM
It's really difficult to find a good hitman intern nowadays.  They always want to clumsily bumble straight into the killing part.  There's filing to be done and coffee to be made kiddo.
 
2014-04-10 10:46:56 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: Public Savant

FTA: We don't want to be hit men. We don't find them glamorous; we're repulsed by them.

Since some people become hitmen, I guess that's just not true.


Change 'hit' to 'garbage' and recompute.


Where I live that isn't a bad gig. The pay is good, and if you hurry up a bit, then you have extra spare time.

/I am talking about garbage men, just to clarify
 
2014-04-10 10:47:17 AM

xaks:  I wonder...

...

How does one get a job as a hitman? Or anything in organized crime, for that matter?

Hell, I'd imagine most folks aren't capable of being hitmen. How does one even figure out that one could do this? Does one accidentally off someone and not get caught, then have an a-ha moment at the kitchen table one Sunday morning?

Oddly curious, I am.


They come to you and they say "Hey Poot, you got a piece? You ready to put in the work?"

You want to move up, so you say yes. It turns out your first mark is your best friend. Life is hard. You gotta be harder.
 
2014-04-10 10:47:53 AM
The study's most notable dilettante is Orville Wright, a former legal clerk. He was offered 5,000 pounds to murder Theresa Pitkin in 1996, and broke into her apartment with a knife. Then, rather than kill her, he started talking to her. He decided he couldn't go through with it. This wasn't a coldblooded killer.

Classic rookie mistake.
 
2014-04-10 10:49:09 AM

brap


It's really difficult to find a good hitman intern nowadays. They always want to clumsily bumble straight into the killing part. There's filing to be done and coffee to be made kiddo.


What a hitman intern might look like:

www.aceshowbiz.com
 
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