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(NBC 29 Charlottesville)   Even without the streaming video, jury awards $5,001 to a man whose coffee pot was tainted with urine   (nbc29.com) divider line 50
    More: Followup, Daunte Culpepper, Culpeper Coffee, coffeepots, streaming video  
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2379 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Apr 2014 at 10:05 AM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-10 09:06:32 AM  
This is my coffee ot. Notice there is no "p" in it. Please keep it that way.
 
2014-04-10 10:09:51 AM  
I really don't want to see a video of the stream.
 
2014-04-10 10:10:53 AM  
From the way I heard it yesterday the guy who put the pee in there would get it from the toilet, so when the coffee was tested it had "fecal residue" in it as well.
 
2014-04-10 10:12:43 AM  
Fast food employees owe me a lot of money then
 
2014-04-10 10:14:35 AM  
With a culprit named Butler tainting the coffee pot, you'd think to look for Uranus contamination, too.
 
2014-04-10 10:14:37 AM  
This is the biggest thing that happened in Culpeper since the Robinson River flood and the Wolftown riots of 1755.
 
2014-04-10 10:15:41 AM  
Coffee generally tastes like piss anyway.  I'm surprised this guy could tell the difference.
 
2014-04-10 10:16:12 AM  
Urine a lot of trouble, buddy.
 
2014-04-10 10:16:22 AM  
POOP PEE THREAD!!!!
 
2014-04-10 10:16:47 AM  
If it had poop in it he would have gotten $5002.
 
2014-04-10 10:20:49 AM  
The guy probably pissed in the pot because the moron would take the last cup and not make another pot.
Better yet he wouldn't turn off the burner so the pot would crack.
I've seen these morons at work.
 
2014-04-10 10:23:01 AM  
The coffee pot had a leak.
 
2014-04-10 10:24:32 AM  
It's stories like this that make me never trust a communal coffee pot.
 
2014-04-10 10:30:01 AM  
I'm glad the jury awarded this man some money instead of leaving him without a pot to piss in.
 
2014-04-10 10:30:21 AM  
That extra dollar makes all the difference.
 
2014-04-10 10:30:41 AM  
R. Kelly now despondent.
 
2014-04-10 10:34:35 AM  
Urine is sterile and is safe to consume in small amounts.

i.telegraph.co.uk
 
2014-04-10 10:36:46 AM  

traylor: Urine is sterile and is safe to consume in small amounts.

[i.telegraph.co.uk image 460x288]


And I like the taste

i57.tinypic.com
 
2014-04-10 10:37:36 AM  
$1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.

/Utz deserves more, if nothing else give him more for making those delicious cheese balls!
 
2014-04-10 10:37:50 AM  

groppet: From the way I heard it yesterday the guy who put the pee in there would get it from the toilet, so when the coffee was tested it had "fecal residue" in it as well.


To be fair, pretty much everything has detectable levels of fecal matter.
 
2014-04-10 10:37:51 AM  

traylor: Urine is sterile and is safe to consume in small amounts.

[i.telegraph.co.uk image 460x288]


You first.
 
2014-04-10 10:41:10 AM  
That's it? At the very least you should be able to piss in the offender's mouth and make him swallow.

Eye for an eye. Pee for a pee.
 
2014-04-10 10:42:12 AM  
And while urine may be sterile, it's the stuff in it, that isn't.
 
2014-04-10 10:45:26 AM  
www.alexhilhorst.com

What's wrong? Is the coffee too hot?
No. The kid pissed in it.
 
2014-04-10 10:50:04 AM  

eyemarten: $1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.

/Utz deserves more, if nothing else give him more for making those delicious cheese balls!


For almost a decade I was in security (both data and physical) and did a lot of employee investigations.  After some of the shiat I saw I can tell you that I don't consume anything at work unless I see it come from a sealed container.  People you think are perfectly normal do the most mind blowing things.  Call me paranoid, and perhaps I am, but after what I've witnessed done by people I wouldn't think capable I have lost my trust of people.
 
2014-04-10 10:52:26 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.com

/*sigh*
 
2014-04-10 10:54:06 AM  

KidneyStone: eyemarten: $1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.

/Utz deserves more, if nothing else give him more for making those delicious cheese balls!

For almost a decade I was in security (both data and physical) and did a lot of employee investigations.  After some of the shiat I saw I can tell you that I don't consume anything at work unless I see it come from a sealed container.  People you think are perfectly normal do the most mind blowing things.  Call me paranoid, and perhaps I am, but after what I've witnessed done by people I wouldn't think capable I have lost my trust of people.


Go on....
 
2014-04-10 11:04:04 AM  
IT'S OVER 5000!
 
2014-04-10 11:06:45 AM  
Some people are ao poor, they don't have a pot to piss in. Some people
 
2014-04-10 11:10:01 AM  

Wasilla Hillbilly: groppet: From the way I heard it yesterday the guy who put the pee in there would get it from the toilet, so when the coffee was tested it had "fecal residue" in it as well.

To be fair, pretty much everything has detectable levels of fecal matter.


Well I'm never eating again now. Guess ill be like that living Barbie and live off air and sunshine.
 
2014-04-10 11:15:07 AM  
Sometimes I feel I have to, run away.
 
2014-04-10 11:22:46 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-04-10 11:32:17 AM  

eyemarten: $1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.

/Utz deserves more, if nothing else give him more for making those delicious cheese balls!


It was $1 in compensatory damages and $5000 in punitive damages. IANAL, but compensatory damages are taxable,but punitive damages are not, so he made out ok.
 
2014-04-10 11:34:05 AM  
Anyone here care for some Chock Full O' Pee?
 
2014-04-10 11:36:47 AM  
I believe there's a song about this..
 
2014-04-10 11:44:14 AM  

Mirandized: . IANAL


NTTAWWT
 
2014-04-10 11:44:47 AM  
With a judgment like that they should have gotten Jeopardy! announcer Johnny Gilbert to read it. It's always seemed to be as though he gets some kind of perverse pleasure from saying "...whose cash winnings total five thousand ONE dollars!"
 
2014-04-10 11:47:02 AM  

Mirandized: eyemarten: $1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.

/Utz deserves more, if nothing else give him more for making those delicious cheese balls!

It was $1 in compensatory damages and $5000 in punitive damages. IANAL, but compensatory damages are taxable,but punitive damages are not, so he made out ok.


Compensatory damages are also limited to the actual provable costs. Since those were nothing (well, a few cents worth of dish soap and 3 minutes of his time) and the minimum for it to have legal value is a dollar, he got a dollar. Punitive damages are intended to impose a financial cost large enough so that they have some motivation to not do it again, so those are a little more flexible. It's also why you get a lot more money if you sue McDonalds than if you sue your local coffee shop- it takes a much larger amount of money to make McDonalds change its behavior.

This case is pretty much exactly how the system's designed to work.
 
2014-04-10 11:51:22 AM  
Urine is a bodily fluid that can potentially transfer all sorts of diseases, like HIV. It's weird how someone who spills hot coffee on their lap gets hundreds of times the amount of compensation.
 
2014-04-10 11:54:46 AM  
www.killthehydra.com
 
2014-04-10 11:58:53 AM  

eyemarten: $1 in damages? That is crap. It would make me mistrust coffee from anywhere forever.


$1 for a new pot.  $5k for putting the urine in.  Personally, I'd have given him $5 for a new pot.

Mirandized: It was $1 in compensatory damages and $5000 in punitive damages. IANAL, but compensatory damages are taxable,but punitive damages are not, so he made out ok.


A quick google search shows that it's more complicated, but probably the opposite.  The compensatory damages are to make the guy 'whole' and are probably not taxed, much like an insurance payment.  The Punitive damages would be taxed, because that's income above and beyond his injury.
 
2014-04-10 12:03:29 PM  

Two16: [www.killthehydra.com image 245x245]


Sorry, but I just can't bring myself to listen to Brad Pitt tell me to lighten up and have a glass of pee.
 
2014-04-10 12:06:54 PM  
The reason for the $1 in compensatory damages is because under the law you can't have any punitive damages unless there are compensatory damages, the theory being that you can't punish somebody if there's been no actual harm.

To get around that, I'm betting that the jury realized, when they got the jury instructions, that unless they put some amount of compensatory damages, then they wouldn't be able to award any punitives.

Then, probably, some jurors pointed out that the victim had no actual damages.

But there's going to have been another jury instruction that allows "nominal damages" in the place of compensatory damages, i.e., $1.

So, the jury gives $1 in nominal, read: compensatory, damages.

This clears the way under the jury instructions for the award of $5k in punitives.

/IAAL
 
2014-04-10 12:20:18 PM  
Here is your Coffee Mr. Tucker
 
2014-04-10 12:21:44 PM  

Geralt: Urine is a bodily fluid that can potentially transfer all sorts of diseases, like HIV. It's weird how someone who spills hot coffee on their lap gets hundreds of times the amount of compensation.


And if he had contracted all sorts of diseases, like HIV, he could sue for more money. He didn't though.

Which do you think costs more, getting the nasty taste out of your mouth and moving on, or skin grafts?
 
2014-04-10 12:44:13 PM  

Gunboat: The reason for the $1 in compensatory damages is because under the law you can't have any punitive damages unless there are compensatory damages, the theory being that you can't punish somebody if there's been no actual harm.

To get around that, I'm betting that the jury realized, when they got the jury instructions, that unless they put some amount of compensatory damages, then they wouldn't be able to award any punitives.

Then, probably, some jurors pointed out that the victim had no actual damages.

But there's going to have been another jury instruction that allows "nominal damages" in the place of compensatory damages, i.e., $1.

So, the jury gives $1 in nominal, read: compensatory, damages.

This clears the way under the jury instructions for the award of $5k in punitives.

/IAAL


And are the punitive damages taxable?
 
2014-04-10 02:12:54 PM  

Mirandized: And are the punitive damages taxable?


From the IRS site:  Generally, punitive damages are taxable, but there are exceptions (See "Wrongful Death" discussed below.)

source:   http://www.irs.gov/Businesses/Small-Businesses-&-Self-Employed/Lawsui t s-Awards-and-Settlements-Audit-Techniques-Guide#_Toc305586646
 
2014-04-10 02:56:31 PM  
i58.tinypic.com
 
2014-04-10 04:17:45 PM  
that coffee pot really tied the room together.
 
2014-04-11 09:14:44 AM  
Well, he's got a small revenue stream coming.
It'll peter out before too long though.
Might be hard to shake those last few dollars out of the offender.
 
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