We all could have made it if he'd built a bridge.

...pleaded guilty Tuesday to property destruction and dispensing an offensive matter in a pond

I think he crapped his pants.

He should have tried a Dodge Charger...




YEEEE HAAAWWWW

Should he:

A.) Build a ramp
B.) Drive around the pond.
C.) Ask Daisy out to the Boar's Nest for a drink.
D.) Yell 'Yeehaa!' and floor it.

/Old link

And if a frog had wings, it wouldn't bump its ass a-hoppin'.

Would you by funiture from a store called "unpainted Huffhinds"?

"OOooooOOOOooO! Them dang Duke boys!!! Geeeeyaaaaaaa! They's always trying to outrun me and Flash! But this time we got 'em!"

---Roscoe P. Coltrane, arresting officer.

Strangely enough, there's no mention of drugs or alcohol in this story.

Looks like the pond was the only thing polluted.

Why do I feel like this guy is going to end up as a Darwin Awards story very soon?

If it wasn't for that horse, I never would have spent that year in college.

But he cheated death, right?

This guy obviously isn't Cuban.

/Reminded of yesterday's Buick boat

By the time he gets out his proctologist will need to build a ramp

Funny how it wasn't until afterwards he thought of a ramp.

Kinda like running out of gas, then figuring out you need to put gas in the car..

"I wouldn'ta run outta gas if ida put gas in the car.."

bark_atda_moon damn. you beat me to it.


/queues the Dukes theme song

No ramp? He should have drank a can of Red Bull.


/got nothing

He should have cut the wheel and tried to skip the car across.

Plus if he had gotten away the cop who arrested him would have had to eat his hat.

Are we on our way to a sunken-green-buick trifecta?

/er, nothin'

You farkers mean this freak here actually beat him to it?

The guy reminds me of Ted Kennedy. Did they check the pond for the girlfriend that was with him? How long did it take before the incident was reported? Could this guy swim?

I'm sorry Michael, I didn't have enough power for a Turbo Boost

I guess I am the only one who things that 270 days in jail is a bit much for what he did?

Truth is, FarmCorp (or whoever) can no longer have use free of the pond and they demand blood.

He was making his way the only way he knows how

But that's just a little more than gravity would allow

um, *Florida* tag?!?

I LOVED that show, but does it work today?

My question is. Under today's laws would Bo and Luke be criminals?

Besides the obvious automotive safety issues like Nitrous Oxide intake kits and both the driver and passenger side doors being welded shut. There are also some serious political ramifications behind their chosen mode of transport.

Would an orange Dodge Charger with the rebel flag painted on top be considered a symbol of hate? Would blowing an air horn which mimics the confederate battle charge be considered an act of racial intimidation? Even the chargers name "The General Lee" could also be considered offensive in many communities.

Are the Duke Boys racist? Why are there no blacks in Hazard? Perhaps the towns name Hazard is in fact a veiled threat to any person of color who might consider migrating there?

Country music star Waylon Jennings might have said that the dukes boys were Nevr Meanin no harm But one must look at the source, Waylon himself, whose nickname is The Outlaw and is known to associate with performers like David Alan Coe (1977 Workin like a N****R) makes a poor character witness.

With todays political climate of fear. Ex Con Uncle Jessie's moon shinning operation could easily get him charged under North Carolina's Anti-Terrorist statutes. Citing the Manufacturer of Nuclear or Chemical weapons act, the local magistrate Boss Hogg would only need to prove the explosive potential of Jessies homemade still and or recipe.

I suspect the local mechanic Cooter would have to answer to the EPA for removing the Catalytic converter and installing exhaust headers on Roscoe P Coaltrains squad car in a futile attempt by the Sheriff to get them duke boys. A clear and fragrant violation of our nations environmental laws.

While at work today, I attempted to do some web research on this shady character. Unfortunately our Content filter nails most returned queries on cooter for adult content? I hope to discover more about him once I get home.

Roscoe himself might even need to explain how he managed to "Scuff" so many government "Veehicals". How many times do you need to try before you realize you just cant jump "Johnson's Crik"? Also, even with federal and state anti-narcotics funding the only communications technology incorporated by the Hazard County Sheriffs office was common Citizens Band radios which could be monitored by anyone with equipment that can be purchased easily in nearby Capitol City. Where exactly did the money go if it was not spent on infrastructure? I would suggest that Boss Hogg open an independent investigation into Hazards procurement procedures.

Justin Williams

"Hold my beer, and watch this!"

/so obvious

Damnit, ChairmanKaga, you're ruining my childhood memories.


_{hee hee "cooter"}

Is this the right room for an argument?

ChairmanKaga- while at work today...

That has got to be the funniest thing I've ever heard.

Too bad he didn't have those Cuban guys build the car for him. Then landing in a pond wouldn't be such a big deal.

Arcas

Here is your theme music...

and better yet.... YEEEE HAW

-/Not my server so don't overload.

shouldn't this have a flordia tag on it?

ChairmanKaga:

I don't think it is too severe. Good water is not the most plentiful thing in Wyoming and a dumping a car in a pond can seriously damage it. Not like duming a car in the Potomac or Mississippi, who the heck would notice?

Something tells me even if he had built a ramp, the end result would be the same.

"That guy isn't fit to sniff my poo."

ChairmanKaga

/golf clap

wingnut396

Water is everyones concern, I agree. The Koran has special provisions for someone who poisons a well!

But we should also look at this Dill Weeds intentions

He wasnt attempting to poison the well. He was trying to jump over it.

If i put an item on my to do list that says "jump pond in old Buick" and then not do it, will I go to jail?

He shoulda checked logistics with Super Dave Osborne

buried_alive
I love that movie.

"Kyle, I can spit 10 feet"
Spits/Bridge crashes
"Better make it 60 miles an hour"
"Right"

Wait, people live in Wyoming?

People live here. It's not just a wolf/grizzly bear park for the city folks to pollute.

Well thank you pal, the day I get out of prison, my own brother picks me up in a police car.

[Fog horn and warning bell sounds]

Elwood:
You don't like it?

Jake:
No, I don't like it.

[Elwood drives over a raising draw bridge]

Jake:
Cars got a lot of pick up.

Am I the only one who just noticed that KITT was SO high-tech that he had an MP1 player?