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(CBS New York)   While "lighting a mattress on fire" may indeed cure your boredom, there SHOULD be another part of your brain that tells you "NO, dumbass....NO"   (newyork.cbslocal.com) divider line 22
    More: Dumbass, nyc police, New York City, Cornell Medical Center, flame spread, dumbass, brightness, cure  
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2172 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Apr 2014 at 8:49 AM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



22 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-04-08 08:08:00 AM  
that part of my brain frequently says, YES, YES....and i am so very weak. And he has good ideas, some of the time.

/fat chicks actually DO give good head. honest.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-04-08 08:39:30 AM  
I don't think that part develops until about 29.
 
2014-04-08 08:52:03 AM  
That part of my brain says "go find somewhere secluded and free of flammable objects where you can light that mattress on fire safely."
 
2014-04-08 08:57:37 AM  
There are always those I wonder if thoughts.  There was a radio talk show host in St Louis that was really funny who talked about giving into those thoughts sometimes.  His story was about what if I threw my keys into that gap in the elevator door.  Unfortunately he snapped and gave in after a night shift on a friday night.  They had to find the building super on the weekend to come open up the elevator to get his keys out.  If I recall it 'happened' a second time.  The super was not impressed.

I can't say I've ever been truly close to doing anything that dumb, but I always think of him when one of those really bad ideas pop into my head.

/always wanted to do a blues brother scene in a mall or downtown fountain.
 
2014-04-08 08:58:17 AM  
Sounds like an Obama voter
 
2014-04-08 08:59:49 AM  
I woke before noon on Sunday and got about two hours sleep since. Some funky fuzz in my frontal sinus. Lighting the neighbors on fire doesn't sound like a bad idea.
 
2014-04-08 08:59:51 AM  
"There's no malice; there's an excitement with these kids,"

No. Just the one kid. Your very dumb kid.
 
2014-04-08 09:02:32 AM  
Say what you will Subby, but nothing gets your point across like lighting a mattress fire on someones lawn.
 
2014-04-08 09:04:34 AM  
Every elevator in the US clearly states: In Case of Fire, Take This Elevator to the Fire with a phone number to call to sue for damages like smoke inhalation or burning to death.
 
2014-04-08 09:05:19 AM  
Subby, are you the dude that writes those horoscopes for The Onion?

\just sounds like the same guy
 
2014-04-08 09:11:56 AM  
I do not have any pictures of the mattresses I have burned but here are two couches I had to get rid of. They go up really quickly. i.imgur.com
 
2014-04-08 09:12:46 AM  
"There's no malice; there's an excitement with these kids," Robert Maldonado, a resident of the building, said. "They just want to light up a fire, and they don't see the consequences. So I feel bad for the two officers."

I feel just a little bit dumber after reading this.
 
2014-04-08 09:24:29 AM  

wild9: I do not have any pictures of the mattresses I have burned but here are two couches I had to get rid of. They go up really quickly. [i.imgur.com image 850x637]


Well, sure, what did you expect? There's an awful lot of methane buildup there.

/Got a mattress and boxspring in my backyard to get rid of.  $24 to dump it at the waste plant is better than the risks of burning it.  $0 to dump it in a random construction dumpster is appealing but my days of pointless risk are long gone.
 
2014-04-08 09:31:51 AM  

TheCableGuy: wild9: I do not have any pictures of the mattresses I have burned but here are two couches I had to get rid of. They go up really quickly. [i.imgur.com image 850x637]

Well, sure, what did you expect? There's an awful lot of methane buildup there.

/Got a mattress and boxspring in my backyard to get rid of.  $24 to dump it at the waste plant is better than the risks of burning it.  $0 to dump it in a random construction dumpster is appealing but my days of pointless risk are long gone.


I live out on 60 acres so burning is an option :) But sometimes, like this last weekend, we blow up old appliances and furniture with tannerite.
 
2014-04-08 09:42:35 AM  

untaken_name: That part of my brain says "go find somewhere secluded and free of flammable objects where you can light that mattress on fire safely."


Which quickly loses the fight with the "mattress is heavy, and if it isn't actually sitting in the hallway because someone abandoned it, I would get caught stealing a farking mattress" part of the brain.

/especially when the "if you can't win, go for the epic fail" part of the brain gets involved
 
2014-04-08 10:23:10 AM  
My sister got in trouble with her friends for burning couches when the Terps won the final four years ago.
 
2014-04-08 10:57:09 AM  
Worked with a guy who had lost his job and had been out of work for a year.  Fell into depression and when his dog died it sent him over the edge. Set fire to his mattress and then tried to put it out. He got burned in the process and destroyed an entire block of apartments. Fortunately everyone got out ok.

Never did find out what happened to him. Figured they would post the court findings and sentence, but nothing ever popped up in the paper.
 
2014-04-08 11:17:33 AM  
I think Sparky should get a regular ass-kicking.  A bet he wouldn't be "bored", knowing that another one is coming.
 
2014-04-08 11:30:50 AM  

Tatterdemalian: Which quickly loses the fight with the "mattress is heavy, and if it isn't actually sitting in the hallway because someone abandoned it, I would get caught stealing a farking mattress" part of the brain.

/especially when the "if you can't win, go for the epic fail" part of the brain gets involved


I'm a weird combination of accountant and pyro. I would burn the mattress safely and get out cleanly, if possible. The latter part being the most important - I can burn another mattress later, worst case. I know where my ex keeps her spare key.
 
2014-04-08 02:02:50 PM  
Bed Bugs must burn.
 
2014-04-08 02:40:59 PM  
One part of my brain wonders if the little tag should be removed before burning the mattress; another worries about the risk of removing said tag by hand as opposed to leaving it to be burnt in the fire.

www.dacritics.org
 
2014-04-08 04:28:42 PM  
 
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