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(NYPost)   So I'm guilty, eh? Whatever. Can I get a drink?   (nypost.com) divider line 16
    More: Dumbass, Margaritaville, brooklyn federal court, minimum sentence, Akeem Monsalvatge  
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8117 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2014 at 10:12 PM (28 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-04-05 11:00:24 PM  
2 votes:

Ral: A condemned man asking for Patron, of all the possible tequilas to choose from, illustrates more than anything for me how big of a tool this guy is.  Patron is, at best, a mediocre tequila even for mixed drinks.  I don't care how much it costs.  That's no guide to how good it is.  He only thinks it's baller because of the music he listens to and the celebrities he attempts to emulate.

/Sauza Hornitos is $16 a bottle and way better tequila than Patron
//friend is a bartender who thinks people who order Patron shots are hilarious


Oh a bartender? Well a lifetime of popping beer caps for 2 bucks a hour certainly qualifies them as a tequila expert.
2014-04-06 01:31:12 AM  
1 votes:

Abacus9: doglover: Abacus9: Just put a bullet in their head.

Because, in the execution of their crime no one was hurt but insurance companies and they showed a hell of a lot more brain power than anyone on Fark.com ever has. It's not quite the same as one of Dick Turpin's bungling attacks.

Also, bullets are wasteful and messy. A guillotine or sword works just fine, if it comes to that.

Armed robbery. No one got hurt. Would you make the same argument about drunk driving?


I do. Frequently. America is set up in such a way that to enjoy the legal boon of alcohol at a bar, you have to drive in most places. Then, instead of helping people with a reasonable time frame where they can sober up or drink till they pass out and sleep it, they force everyone out onto the road at 2 AM. Then, to make things even extra special, they have DUI checkpoints near the bars to catch "dangerous" drunk drivers. Thanks to the laws, at certain hours, there's more drunks than sobers on the road.That's not crime prevention, that's criminalization by proxy.

You know where DUI isn't a big problem? Tokyo. Public drinking is legal, it goes 24 hours, and there's enough light rail, bus, and taxi goodness that you can get fall down drunk and still make it home without even owning a car. Plenty of crash space oriented business, as well. Europe is like this too. In the Netherlands, drunk cycling is encouraged. It's safer than operating cars. If DUI was such a big problem, We could easily regulate it out of existence with a few simple rules changes, easing up on alternative, and an investment in public transport. Harm reduction, works every time.


But America's legal system imprisons Justice in stone and plants her outside with a blindfold and her back to the proceedings. That's your first clue something is dreadfully wrong with it. When an armed robbery with no shots fired, no deaths or injuries, nets a mandatory MINIMUM sentence that is less than that of first degree murder. That's just insanity.
2014-04-06 01:06:56 AM  
1 votes:

frozenhotchocolate: proteus_b: frozenhotchocolate: Mayber I should send him this article, I'm sure that would help the situation

How would that help the fact that he has an insensitive and unfunny coworker?

I was just told today he was bi-polar, I didn't know. I should not have said that, he hates me now. But I thought it was funny and that's all that matters to me.


So, you're telling us you're an asshole on many levels?
2014-04-05 11:40:23 PM  
1 votes:

Abacus9: Stone Meadow: doglover: mandatory minimum sentence of 32 years.

[www.themonolith.com image 292x302]

Yeah...wut?! Let's see...simple armed robbery with no one getting hurt gets a  MINIMUM sentence of 32 years? Fark me, New York, this bullshiat is why you can't have nice things.

From another article: "A recent report found the city's annual cost per inmate was $167,731 in 2012."

So lessee, in today dollars $167,731 x 3 guys x 32 years = $16,102,176. That's SIXTEEN MILLION DOLLARS. The city is going to spend more than twice what these guys stole the very first year of their incarceration. And then they're going to keep doing it for 30+ more years. Good luck with that.

Are you actually white knighting armed robbery?


In New York the mandatory minimum sentence for first degree murder is 20 years. How do they come up with 32 years for a robbery in which no one was even injured, much less killed?

Or are you white knighting murderers?
2014-04-05 11:37:14 PM  
1 votes:
Hell, if we dumped a quarter of the resources from the failed war on drugs into education for impoverished districts instead, the US might actually be number one at something academic.
2014-04-05 11:35:20 PM  
1 votes:
32 years in prison over a robbery with no casualties? This tough on crime bullshiat has to stop.
2014-04-05 11:31:53 PM  
1 votes:

Abacus9: Stone Meadow: doglover: mandatory minimum sentence of 32 years.

[www.themonolith.com image 292x302]

Yeah...wut?! Let's see...simple armed robbery with no one getting hurt gets a  MINIMUM sentence of 32 years? Fark me, New York, this bullshiat is why you can't have nice things.

From another article: "A recent report found the city's annual cost per inmate was $167,731 in 2012."

So lessee, in today dollars $167,731 x 3 guys x 32 years = $16,102,176. That's SIXTEEN MILLION DOLLARS. The city is going to spend more than twice what these guys stole the very first year of their incarceration. And then they're going to keep doing it for 30+ more years. Good luck with that.

Are you actually white knighting armed robbery?


There are punishments other than jail. Jail time is the stupidest idea anyone's ever come up with. It does nothing but destroy people. 32 years in jail minimum? That's worse than the punishment reserved for high treason. All it will do is destroy them, and if they even survive they will continue to be a burden to society because they'll be too old to work, too unemployable to get jobs even if they weren't felons, and they'll probably wind up robbing another bank just to go back to jail where there's food and blankets.

They've successfully stolen a few million more dollars from us all and we've reinforced their particular chapter of the 415 KUMI by giving them two more potential thugs. 32 years is a life sentence and if you're in for what's gonna be life, why not add another lifetime on top of that and kill some Aryan Brotherhood leader with your toothbrush shiv in exchange for some butt smuggled drugs or a few hundred in your commissary account? It's the kind of thing that happens in prisons.

Meanwhile, if we just had them to do menial labor for low pay till the money they stole was repaid and take them on a tour of local high schools in chains to explain to the kids that if you want to rob a bank, you have to work your way up to manager first or this will be your fate we'd wind up doing basically the same exact sentence but, and this is really the crux of the issue, it would be morally acceptable. We'd be training them for life in the real world by giving them at least a decade of vocational experience. We could even teach them some of the trades. Give them some books on plumbing. What else do you have to do while in a prison cell but read? We might actually rehabilitate them into productive citizens by the end of such a work program. Always gonna be clogged toilets. Instead of lining a private prison's pockets, they'd be paying taxes and , if they fark up, we could just shoot them dead on the spot. Bingo-bango.

And, with a lighter prisoner load from all the vice laws I would see repealed, prisons would actually have the resources to focus on rehabilitation, reintegration, and elimination as individual prisoners' needs and potential demanded.

But no one elects me king of everything. I'm always a write in.
2014-04-05 11:29:51 PM  
1 votes:
Sorry pal, the drinks aren't on the house; they're in the house -- the big house.
2014-04-05 11:06:56 PM  
1 votes:

meow said the dog: LAUGHTER OL of course he cannot be provided with the drinking because that would be to treat this individual like the human as opposed to the commodity in the for profit prison system although this probably will be the new idea which would be to use the commissary account for the alcoholic beverages. The rule of this would also require the overnight stay in the drinking house to avoid any of the problems with the drunkenness. Do something stupid and you lose the privilege of this. You can do this once the month with the cap of 3 drinks. The room of the evening would cost $20 for you which is quite the bit in the commissary. Each drink would cost to you $10 for the beer or as they call this in the New York City happy hour pricing LAUGHTER OL.


That was poetry.
2014-04-05 11:00:29 PM  
1 votes:

doglover: mandatory minimum sentence of 32 years.

[www.themonolith.com image 292x302]


Yeah...wut?! Let's see...simple armed robbery with no one getting hurt gets a  MINIMUM sentence of 32 years? Fark me, New York, this bullshiat is why you can't have nice things.

From another article: "A recent report found the city's annual cost per inmate was $167,731 in 2012."

So lessee, in today dollars $167,731 x 3 guys x 32 years = $16,102,176. That's SIXTEEN MILLION DOLLARS. The city is going to spend more than twice what these guys stole the very first year of their incarceration. And then they're going to keep doing it for 30+ more years. Good luck with that.
2014-04-05 10:26:15 PM  
1 votes:
I always figured "lavish spending" was one of the ways to get noticed after a big score in a heist .. what the hell is wrong with heading to a nice beach and drinking and womanizing until your liver is as hard as the jail time you've avoided?
2014-04-05 10:25:53 PM  
1 votes:
Interesting how the article explains to the world what they did wrong so you can do it right next time.
2014-04-05 10:24:20 PM  
1 votes:
Rookie mistake:  They should have dressed like Goldman-Sachs employees, no one would have batted an eye.
2014-04-05 10:20:54 PM  
1 votes:
i157.photobucket.com
2014-04-05 08:26:19 PM  
1 votes:
Afterward, the childhood pals set out on a shopping spree from Manhattan to Beverly Hills, buying such luxury items as $1,600 Christian Louboutin shoes and $600 Louis Vuitton belts.

They deserve 30 years just for spending so much money on tacky.
2014-04-05 07:49:49 PM  
1 votes:
LAUGHTER OL of course he cannot be provided with the drinking because that would be to treat this individual like the human as opposed to the commodity in the for profit prison system although this probably will be the new idea which would be to use the commissary account for the alcoholic beverages. The rule of this would also require the overnight stay in the drinking house to avoid any of the problems with the drunkenness. Do something stupid and you lose the privilege of this. You can do this once the month with the cap of 3 drinks. The room of the evening would cost $20 for you which is quite the bit in the commissary. Each drink would cost to you $10 for the beer or as they call this in the New York City happy hour pricing LAUGHTER OL.
 
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