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(Washington Post)   Obama offers half a sandwich, and then wants that half sandwich back. This is not a metaphor   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 224
    More: Misc, President Obama, Paul Reubens  
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13543 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Apr 2014 at 3:15 PM (16 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



224 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-04-03 03:58:42 PM

cman: /I bet you don't know what a whoopee pie is.

Whoopie Pie: The act of spraying whip cream into her vagina while she is upside down so that the whip cream is displayed appropriately.

/rule 34
 
2014-04-03 03:58:49 PM
If you give the President half a sandwich he will want the other half too. When he finishes the other half, he will want a pickle to go with it. Eating the pickle will remind him of the pickle he was in when healthcare.gov was not working. He will ask to borrow your computer to check if the website is still running. When he checking the website he will get a call from the NSA about his computer usage. He will want to call Putin to see what Edward Snowden is up to. Putin will tell him that Russia has annexed Crimea and has troops on the Ukraine border. That will remind him of the illegal immigrants crossing the border to work in the fields to pick fruits and vegetables. Thinking of fruit and vegetables will make him hungry. He will ask you for a pickle. And if you give him a pickle, chances are he will ask for a half sandwich.
 
2014-04-03 03:58:53 PM
Putin would have eaten the first half, the other half, and he would have eaten portions of the sandwiches of those sitting near him; while not wearing a shirt and wrestling a bear
 
2014-04-03 03:59:42 PM
I think the real issue is that Zingermans half sandwich is really a full sandwich and reporters love stories about how backwards the Midwest is.
 
2014-04-03 04:00:00 PM
 Who the hell gives up any portion of a reuben?
 
2014-04-03 04:00:16 PM

Serious Post on Serious Thread: acad1228: tricycleracer: PainInTheASP: cman: I think the controversy here is it being called a reuben.

My dumbass fellow Mainers call subs Italians.

But seriously, its a Sub, or Submarine Sandwich.

And its called Soda. Its not pop, its soda.

Corned beef and sauerkraut is traditionally known as a Reuben.

/I should know.  I'm a professional sandwich eater.

Seriously, who doesn't know what a Reuben is?  Is it called a "Jew York Melt" in flyover country?

Speaking for Oklahoma, a Reuben here is corned beef and sauerkraut on rye. Sometimes it's served with swiss cheese. Always with brown mustard.

Okies be wrong.

A Reuben is Corned Beef OR Pastrami (or go crazy with a combo), on Rye bread, topped with sourkraut, which is then topped with melted Swiss cheese, and of course another slice of rye.

The controversy can be either the more traditional mustard, or the just as acceptable (IMHO) Russian dressing.

It's crass to be served without a pickle. And if you're at Katz's in NYC, I highly recommend requesting a pickled tomato as well.


I think the mustard is a regional thing. It's just as well. I don't really care for Russian dressing anyway.
 
2014-04-03 04:00:41 PM

Fusilier: DC?

Good!


You'd begrudge me the best sandwich known to Humanity simply because I work for The Man?  (I am not personally The Man, you know.)

Monster.
 
2014-04-03 04:00:49 PM

special20: WTFDYW: NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: WTFDYW: WTF did I just read?

He said it was so big, he gave half of it away. But then it was REALLY good, so he wanted his half back. But he couldn't get it back because the lady already ate it (because it was so good) so he stole her pickle.

Which I'm sure is going to be turned into some kind metaphor for how he us treating the poor oppressed rich people or something.

I know what it said. It was just written like a third grader would write a short article.

You have to know your audience, right?


The Washington Post is decent journalism.
 
2014-04-03 04:00:52 PM
Kind of off topic, but does Obama make the white people ride in the back of Air Force One? I would, if I were him...
 
2014-04-03 04:01:05 PM

Rapmaster2000: I heard that Obama looked at the folds of bright red corned beef and it reminded him of Moochelle and since he's gay he ordered a corn dog instead and Biden is still eating the corned beef and making jokes about how he hasn't eaten folds of beef this good since that '83 Loverboy show at the Capitol Centre in Landover.


Dude, I was at that show!

/actually I wasn't.
// didn't get to the Cap Centre until 87-88 season.
///LOL at your detail "in Landover"
 
2014-04-03 04:01:10 PM

Brick-House: I wish he would stop sharing my tax dollars with those who will NOT support themselves.


Injured military vets?
 
2014-04-03 04:01:19 PM

IvyLady: I think the real issue is that Zingermans half sandwich is really a full sandwich and reporters love stories about how backwards the Midwest is.


...and by "backwards" I am thinking you mean "obese".
 
2014-04-03 04:01:35 PM

special20: cman: /I bet you don't know what a whoopee pie is.
Whoopie Pie: The act of spraying whip cream into her vagina while she is upside down so that the whip cream is displayed appropriately.

/rule 34


Available in the White House Mess on alternate Tuesdays during the Clinton Administration.
 
2014-04-03 04:01:37 PM
"If you like your deli meats you can keep your deli meats. Period."

As long as the government gets its share.
 
2014-04-03 04:04:06 PM
Jarret says it was Neocontastic!
 
2014-04-03 04:04:16 PM

IvyLady: I think the real issue is that Zingermans half sandwich is really a full sandwich and reporters love stories about how backwards the Midwest is.


I disagree: I just checked their menu online, and while there is no "che che spin salad" to found on it, the half reuben is $13.99!  There's your story!

(And: That better be one hell of a sandwich!)
 
2014-04-03 04:04:56 PM

cman: Probably some places around here sell it, but to be honest, I have never had one.


I have never been to a deli anywhere in the U.S. that didn't have a Reuben on it. I guarantee the one around the corner from wherever you are has one.
 
2014-04-03 04:05:11 PM

Rapmaster2000: To be a Rachel in Georgia it has to have slaw AND turkey


Damn them to hell. I had a so-called Reuben with cole slaw, like the cafeteria/KFC style of cole slaw, and it was a travesty.
 
2014-04-03 04:05:25 PM

Deucednuisance: IvyLady: I think the real issue is that Zingermans half sandwich is really a full sandwich and reporters love stories about how backwards the Midwest is.

I disagree: I just checked their menu online, and while there is no "che che spin salad" to found on it, the half reuben is $13.99!  There's your story!

(And: That better be one hell of a sandwich!)


A Reuben at Katz in NYC is $17.45.  Granted, it feeds a family of 4.
 
2014-04-03 04:06:06 PM

Rapmaster2000: Hack Patooey: 2 grams: Put slaw instead of sauerkraut and you've got a Rachel.

Damn, how come I never thought of that.  Brilliant!

Now I'm hungry.

To be a Rachel in Georgia it has to have slaw AND turkey.  In Michigan (including at the deli in question), this is commonly called a Georgia Reuben.

Yeah, it's confusing.


Can I just order a corned beef and Swiss on dark rye, and a side of cole slaw?  And a packet of Russian Dressing, too, please.  To go.  What?  Yea, chips and a drink, too.
 
2014-04-03 04:07:12 PM
I haven't seen anything like that sandwich since the labiaplasty thread last night.
 
2014-04-03 04:07:15 PM
I ain't got time to read all of that, MAKE ME A GODDAM SANDWICH!

www.washingtonpost.com

Complicated menu is complicated.
 
2014-04-03 04:07:52 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: If the President wants your pickle, you put your pickle on the President's plate.


Obambi is emasculating American lunches.
 
2014-04-03 04:08:27 PM
Don't even offer me half a reuben. It's all or none.

And YES. Fries should ALWAYS be served with reubens.
 
2014-04-03 04:09:19 PM
What they didn't mention is that the corned beef was actually made out of kittens.
 
2014-04-03 04:09:24 PM
img.fark.net
You just know that if Romney had been elected he would have ordered Turkey on White bread with Mayo.
 
2014-04-03 04:09:52 PM
"I stopped for two reasons. The first is, the reuben is killer. So I ordered like the small, and it didn't look that small. So I gave half to Valerie Jarrett who's traveling with us. And then after I finished the half, I wanted the halfback. But it was too late. All she had left was the pickle. So I took the pickle."

So, pretty much like our income, you will gladly give us a tax refund if we are under a certain wage bracket, but will make up for it by increasing taxes across the board. Gotcha. Can't get me one way, get me another.
 
2014-04-03 04:09:59 PM

Carn: What they didn't mention is that the corned beef was actually made out of kittens.


Awesome!  Do I have to pay extra, or can you just substitute that in for me?
 
2014-04-03 04:11:22 PM

Rapmaster2000: I bet he put FANCY MUSTARD on that Reuben.  REAL AMERICANS put ketchup on their reubens.


GAH...what are you? A pagan? A plague upon your ketchup sprinkling household.
 
2014-04-03 04:12:08 PM

Hack Patooey: Carn: What they didn't mention is that the corned beef was actually made out of kittens.

Awesome!  Do I have to pay extra, or can you just substitute that in for me?


Only a dollar more!  Comes with pickled puppy penis.
 
2014-04-03 04:12:23 PM
Wow. Thats like.. almost worth an internet!
*applause.gif*

That being said, I may not agree with Obama's political leanings or policy decisions but I do agree that he made a fantastic sandwich choice. Kinda wish I had a reuben right here right now.
 
2014-04-03 04:12:39 PM
He serves up some pretty good stinkburgers.
 
2014-04-03 04:13:25 PM

cedarpark: I ain't got time to read all of that, MAKE ME A GODDAM SANDWICH!

[www.washingtonpost.com image 606x406]

Complicated menu is complicated.


And the girl is taking their order on, I am guessing, an iPad. Christ, what have delis become??
 
2014-04-03 04:15:09 PM

Kevin Lomax: Sounds like he's a reneger.


aaand logging into Fark ate the quote like a presidential sandwich.

The applause was for Lomax's reneger comment
 
2014-04-03 04:16:26 PM
You put the soft butter on the outside of the bread, not too much, you don't want it greasy, just enough to toast it a bit deep. You're more like frying it in a skim of butter than toasting it, this allows it to cook longer with out burning, and provide steam, too, as the milk solids evaporate. You Put a nice layer of the thousand island (Ketchup, mayo, and chopped pickles or relish) on the inside of both slices. You may preheat the corned beef (Sliced wafer thin) and sauerkraut in a cast iron pan, but drain it well before putting on the bread. Add sliced Swiss, ementhal, or baby Swiss and let it melt while it cooks slowly stacked up on a cast iron surface. You may cover it to keep heat in and let it stem slightly if your seeing it dry out too much, or not if it looks too wet.
Practice makes perfect just eat your mistakes.
The bread shouldn't leave you with very greasy fingers, but you will have to wipe them off. It shouldn't drip constantly and it shouldn't fall apart. Use toothpicks. Cut diagonally to give you a smaller edge to bit into.
Serve with some nice steak fries, well drained, crispy and salted.
 
2014-04-03 04:16:47 PM
Indian giver.
 
2014-04-03 04:17:24 PM

sendtodave: Indian giver.


Don't be politically incorrect.  Native American giver.
 
2014-04-03 04:18:01 PM
Is this some retarded version of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie?
 
2014-04-03 04:20:45 PM
Of course the Deli will have to raise the price of the Reuben and possibly cut the hours of the staff  if Obama gets the minimum wage raised.
 
2014-04-03 04:21:47 PM
The really confusing thing is that there are two kinds of Russian dressing. The kind on a Reuben is similar to Thousand Island, but there's also the kind that is like French dressing and ruins everything it touches.
 
2014-04-03 04:22:17 PM

EnderX: Of course the Deli will have to raise the price of the Reuben and possibly cut the hours of the staff  if Obama gets the minimum wage raised.


No need to worry.  Obamacare will bankrupt them first.

Obviously.
 
2014-04-03 04:23:23 PM
I used to work at Zingerman's. I used to make them Reubens. Here's some of the dope on them:

- At Zingerman's, a 'half' sandwich has four ounces of meat, not the eight ounces a 'whole' has. Almost every regular at Zingerman's orders 'half' sandwiches. It is in every other way an entire sandwich. (I had a 1/2 #18 every day for lunch.)

- Zingerman's uses Russian dressing made from scratch (15 gallons at a time). It's not bad, but not terribly interesting either.

- The swiss is Emmenthaler (which cannot be beat).

- The rye is baked in a brick oven at ZIngerman's bakehouse (which is out by the airport). Good stuff.

For the record, I did make 'above minimum wage' when I worked there, but not much above ($7.25 an hour in 1992, IIRC). I don't miss working there one bit.
 
2014-04-03 04:23:27 PM

Carn: What they didn't mention is that the corned beef was actually made out of kittens.


I thought black guys didn't eat pussy?
 
2014-04-03 04:24:09 PM

Sin_City_Superhero: Kind of off topic, but does Obama make the white people ride in the back of Air Force One? I would, if I were him...


Just Chuck Todd.
 
2014-04-03 04:24:45 PM
everythingsimpsons.files.wordpress.com

Michelle, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich.
 
2014-04-03 04:25:03 PM
Deucednuisance:  I just checked their menu online, and while there is no "che che spin salad" to found on it, the half reuben is $13.99!  There's your story!

(And: That better be one hell of a sandwich!)


That's why I only ate at Zingerman's once when I was a student in Ann Arbor.  It was always really expensive, and I was always really broke.
 
2014-04-03 04:25:44 PM
Dammit, now I'm craving a corned beef sammich (not a reuben, as I don't like kraut).  One of those stacked-to-the-rafters sammiches like red5ish just posted.  Imma gonna have to get up to Corky & Lenny's before too much longer.
 
2014-04-03 04:27:25 PM
reading through the comments....I really want a reuben now. Any way that its been suggested in the thread.
 
2014-04-03 04:28:06 PM

sendtodave: Indian giver.


*goes to update the Big Spiffy List*
 
2014-04-03 04:29:13 PM
And I just now realized "Imma gonna" is redundant.
 
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