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(WFAA Fort Worth)   Brookstone files Chapter 11 on news that maybe, just MAYBE, there isn't really a big market for combination radio/juice extractor/foot massager/bluetooth speaker/hemorrhoid donut/wine decanter/overnight bag/nose hair trimmer thingies   (wfaa.com) divider line 42
    More: Obvious, Brookstone, Hair clipper, juice extractor, pop-up shop, Egg Harbor Township, purveyors, Merrimack, esplanades  
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766 clicks; posted to Business » on 03 Apr 2014 at 1:37 PM (24 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-04-03 12:00:58 PM
Well, to be honest combining the nose hair trimmer with the hemorrhoid donut was an obvious mistake.
 
2014-04-03 12:04:04 PM
I can still get all that sh*t at Sharper Image though, right?

Right?
 
2014-04-03 12:04:29 PM
But will it twaddle turnips?
 
2014-04-03 12:18:26 PM
I always viewed Brookstone and Sharper Image products as being intended for people with enough extra money that they mistakenly think they are wealthy and in the upper class, and who want to have conspicuous items to openly demonstrate their status, rather than for people who are actually wealthy and know better than to spend their money on that crap. Over the last ten years in particular, the gray area occupied by that former group has shrunk tremendously, as the "middle class" gets butchered and the latter group expands.
 
2014-04-03 12:24:42 PM
Hamacher Schlemmer will buy them out and just put "The" in front of every product name, and charge double for it..
 
2014-04-03 12:26:08 PM
The only thing I ever got for myself from a Brookstone was a quadricopter for a project in college. Otherwise, I've always treated it as someplace to go for entertainment purposes, not to actually buy things.
 
2014-04-03 12:30:45 PM
Soon, the entire overpriced, useless gadgetry market will be monopolized by noted robber-baron John D. SkyMallfeller.
 
2014-04-03 12:45:35 PM
RIP, poor man's Sharper Image.
 
2014-04-03 01:37:52 PM
The one in my mall seems to sell the exact same crap they sold 5 years ago. Yet when I went into the store recently looking for a shower radio, they couldn't help me.
 
2014-04-03 01:44:10 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: But will it twaddle turnips?


not obscure :-)
 
2014-04-03 01:48:54 PM
Damn, now if I go to the mall I can't sit in the massage chair for free, but pay to use the other ones around the mall.

Wait, I don't go to the mall more than twice a year.
 
2014-04-03 01:56:19 PM
But what will my aging golden retriever use to get into and out of the back of my SUV?
 
2014-04-03 01:58:16 PM
i remember back in the day, when brookstone sold high-end specialty tools. then again, i remember when banana republic sold surplus military gear.

/get off my lawn
 
2014-04-03 02:05:04 PM
facebook should make a bid

maybe people would want an automatic wine bottle opener that also has bluetooth support and a mini camera that can take a picture of the label and return information like proper serving temperature and its wine ratings to brag to your friends about

and it automatically posts to facebook on a socialization app that tallies up the quality of your wines and puts you in a leaderboard based on region
 
2014-04-03 02:28:05 PM

Prey4reign: Well, to be honest combining the nose hair trimmer with the hemorrhoid donut was an obvious mistake.


I saw Skymall offering that as a taint shaver. I don't know what to believe.
 
2014-04-03 02:32:59 PM

markie_farkie: Hamacher Schlemmer will buy them out and just put "The" in front of every product name, and charge double for it..


NO apparently Spencer's Gifts is moving to buy them in what I can only assume is an attempt to create a Voltron of utterly useless and overpriced shiat.
 
2014-04-03 02:40:36 PM
I'd better buy up all that sand you can make into different fun shapes whilst I have the chance.
 
2014-04-03 02:52:00 PM

Magorn: Spencer's Gifts


I remember back in the day when Spencer's was THE place to shop for blacklight posters, edible underwear, "facial massagers",  and assorted head shop accessories..

/off my lawn
 
2014-04-03 02:55:13 PM
Even though Brookstone sucks, I hate to see any store go. It means we're getting closer to just ordering everything online and that's boring. And no more mallrat girls.

/having a seat over here
 
2014-04-03 02:55:53 PM
ArtosRC

Prey4reign: Well, to be honest combining the nose hair trimmer with the hemorrhoid donut was an obvious mistake.


I saw Skymall offering that as a taint shaver. I don't know what to believe.


They do, avoid it... lots of ripping and bleeding.
 
2014-04-03 02:58:49 PM
I remember how these stores were all the rage in the 1990s.

America's short lived obsession with personal massage devices, I guess.
 
2014-04-03 02:58:54 PM
The last time I was in a Brookstone, they were selling a vibrating "massager" that I swear was the size of a jackhammer. It was scary.
 
2014-04-03 03:44:53 PM

H31N0US: But what will my aging golden retriever use to get into and out of the back of my SUV?


There's always the SkyMall catalog conveniently located in your seat back pocket.
 
2014-04-03 03:54:16 PM

Cybernetic: The last time I was in a Brookstone, they were selling a vibrating "massager" that I swear was the size of a jackhammer. It was scary.


What's scary is your mother has burned out the motor on three of those and is going to buy a fourth.
 
2014-04-03 03:59:29 PM

Cybernetic: The last time I was in a Brookstone, they were selling a vibrating "massager" that I swear was the size of a jackhammer. It was scary.


My SIL has one of those.  She calls it Big Boy.
 
2014-04-03 04:33:50 PM

ArtosRC: Prey4reign: Well, to be honest combining the nose hair trimmer with the hemorrhoid donut was an obvious mistake.

I saw Skymall offering that as a taint shaver. I don't know what to believe.



Why, I played football with Taint Shaver at Harvard in '41.  That man was a real sockdollager, I tell you.  We gave Yale what-for that year.
 
2014-04-03 04:51:04 PM

sprawl15: facebook should make a bid

maybe people would want an automatic wine bottle opener that also has bluetooth support and a mini camera that can take a picture of the label and return information like proper serving temperature and its wine ratings to brag to your friends about

and it automatically posts to facebook on a socialization app that tallies up the quality of your wines and puts you in a leaderboard based on region


I am sure you post that in jest but rest assured, right now, somewhere in this country, there is a VC listening to a startup in California pitch this very idea.
 
2014-04-03 04:56:33 PM
I purchased a compact umbrella from an airport Brookstone any years ago (before mobile internet) when I got to my departure airport and saw the weather forecast for my destination had changed. I still have that umbrella, but yeah, most Brookstone stuff was junk.
 
2014-04-03 05:07:41 PM

vento: H31N0US: But what will my aging golden retriever use to get into and out of the back of my SUV?

There's always the SkyMall catalog conveniently located in your seat back pocket.


But if it's in *my* seat back pocket, how can I easily reach it?
 
2014-04-03 05:18:32 PM

Rev. Skarekroe: I can still get all that sh*t at Sharper Image though, right?

Right?


If not, There's always Skymall!
 
2014-04-03 05:24:29 PM
But it's powered by USB! How can you resist a deal like that?
 
2014-04-03 05:33:11 PM

Mugato: Even though Brookstone sucks, I hate to see any store go. It means we're getting closer to just ordering everything online and that's boring. And no more mallrat girls.

/having a seat over here


This. Not so much for the mallrat girls, but the notion of shopping instead. Buying online is easy. Shopping online - when you don't have the slightest idea what you're looking for - is not quite so easy. It's still simpler to just browse the shelves of your nearest retailer waiting for something to jump out at you. I was struggling for an idea for a friend for a Secret Santa party recently, and stumbled upon a Dr. Whooves figurine at the last minute, something I'd never have thought to look for if I were shopping online.

Not that I'm a mallrat myself, but I find a bit of joy in the social act of shopping. I spend enough time interacting with everyone else on digital terms, through a text or an e-mail or a message on Facebook. It's nice to get out and see that there's an active world of other people out there, in whatever capacity. It's not like I'm going to say hello to any of them or anything beyond seeing they exist, but at least you know they're out there. Civilization is reassuring.

There's a certain comfort in instant gratification and being able to actually buy tangible merchandise when you want it, instead of ordering it, waiting for FedEx/UPS to attempt delivery, then have to go pick up the package at the local depot because there's no one home during the day to sign for a package.

Oh, and it doesn't hurt that retail is one of the bigger options for entry-level employment, so to see the retail world disappear would suck for all those high-school kids who need a first way to earn a paycheck and learn lessons on punctuality, responsibility, and how not every person who hires you is trying to screw you.
 
2014-04-03 06:14:56 PM
What, did they remove brookstone from skymall?
 
2014-04-03 09:25:23 PM

ArtosRC: Prey4reign: Well, to be honest combining the nose hair trimmer with the hemorrhoid donut was an obvious mistake.

I saw Skymall offering that as a taint shaver. I don't know what to believe.


"Taint Shavers" is going to be the name of my new rock band.
 
2014-04-03 10:00:05 PM
Last Christmas I went looking for a back massager for a friend who hurt her back in a sports injury. The very nice guy at Relax the Back (where I ended up purchasing something that my friend says really does help) told me Brookstone for years was buying much of their inventory from one Chinese supplier. That company bought them a few years back, and ever since they only carry things from that supplier.

That kind of integrated model doesn't really work too well, especially since a store like that wants to scoop up consumer tech early adopters.
 
2014-04-03 10:07:33 PM
Oh, man!  Are they having a closeout on electric astrolabes?
 
2014-04-04 05:12:11 AM

Delta1212: The only thing I ever got for myself from a Brookstone was a quadricopter for a project in college. Otherwise, I've always treated it as someplace to go for entertainment purposes, not to actually buy things.


Pretty much this. If I see something interesting I think about it for thirty seconds and the entire novelty is over. The place is strictly xray specs and sea monkeys.
 
2014-04-04 06:33:14 AM
If only it included a ball massager then I would buy it.
 
2014-04-04 11:09:57 AM
What do they mean by "online completion?"

I can't stand articles with such dumb mistakes. Seems like the norm in the last few years.
 
2014-04-04 12:13:43 PM

Mugato: Even though Brookstone sucks, I hate to see any store go. It means we're getting closer to just ordering everything online and that's boring. And no more mallrat girls.

/having a seat over here


Now that the weather will be getting warmer there is at least one reason to go to the mall. Young women in their summer clothes (walking in to air conditioning).

I am pretty sure that's why the food court is next to the main entrance from the parking garage,
 
2014-04-04 12:24:23 PM

Mugato: RIP, poor man's Sharper Image.


Actually Sharper Image was a clone of Brookstone. Brookstone came first, was more successful and is still around. Brookstone does carry a lot of items that are not gadgets or junk, but also a lot of junky gadgets.

Ive worked at a brookstone for the last 5 years as a seasonal manager. My experience is that it is the best retail place I have ever worked at. They start people at higher than minimum wage (8.50-9.50 for lowest level which is still to low but higher than others around here), and have bonuses available for all employees that are relatively easy to get. They have a relaxed atmosphere for employees. Its a easy job for retail, for everyone but store manager. You get treated like a person instead of a number, even by the people working in corporate.

Business has gotten slowly worse over the last few years though. I believe there is 2 reasons for this and the economy is not one of them,
1) The internet. Brookstone products are sold on Amazon and other sites for cheaper than in stores. Brookstone needs to eliminate all online sales except through Brookstone.com
2) Apple. The people at Brookstone who decide what products to sell are huge on Apple products. Keyboards, cases, stylus', adapters, etc. Literally 25% of our store was dedicated to Apple related products. It was also the lowest performing section even though our store was 50 feet from an apple store. In our storeroom we had hundred of ipad cases that we could not sell because they were for older models (turns out a 3 month product cycle is bad for those who make accessories). In addition to not selling well, the ipod stuff turns people off from the whole store.

I like working there and I might go back again this October. Brookstone has been good to me.
 
2014-04-04 09:06:02 PM
Why am I not surprised that Brookstone is filing Chapter 11? Well, big surprise, it was controlled by none other than Bain Capital.
 
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