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(Trust.org)   France briefs doctors on warning signs of ebola as fears grow that latest outbreak could spread from Africa. Briefly, when a patient complains of flu-like symptoms then starts to bleed from the eyes and liquefy like a bass in a blender, it's ebola   (trust.org) divider line 21
    More: Scary, physicians, outbreaks, flu, Charles de Gaulle, fears, symptoms  
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3813 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Apr 2014 at 1:45 PM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-04-03 02:12:27 PM
16 votes:
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeboooooooooooola

upload.wikimedia.org
2014-04-03 12:39:56 PM
14 votes:
♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫
2014-04-03 12:05:26 PM
9 votes:
i.imgur.com
/oblig
2014-04-03 02:03:27 PM
6 votes:

Stile4aly: MaudlinMutantMollusk: ♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫

♫ When your mucus membranes
leave you howling in pain
That's ebola.  ♫


When your vomit and stool
Leaves one huge bloody pool
That's ebola
2014-04-03 02:12:09 PM
5 votes:

Cheese eating surrender monkey: meat0918: Anyone remember that Hot Zone show that started out ok, then quickly devolved into Satan is trying to destroy the world with disease?

Or am I getting two shows confused?

You're probably thinking of " The Burning Zone".


Also known as "Lindsay Lohan's Urethra..."
2014-04-03 01:56:33 PM
5 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: ♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫


♫ When your mucus membranes
leave you howling in pain
That's ebola.  ♫
2014-04-03 02:02:26 PM
4 votes:
U.N Envoy Randall Flagg is on it.
2014-04-03 01:53:16 PM
4 votes:
No worries, the French are famous for hygiene and respecting personal space. Ebola won't have a chance.
2014-04-03 02:38:16 PM
3 votes:

Naesen: Stile4aly: MaudlinMutantMollusk: ♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫

♫ When your mucus membranes
leave you howling in pain
That's ebola.  ♫

When your vomit and stool
Leaves one huge bloody pool
That's ebola


When you pass out and bleed
from every orifice indeed
That's ebola...
2014-04-03 03:09:54 PM
2 votes:
img.fark.net
2014-04-03 02:38:12 PM
2 votes:

Tenga: U.N Envoy Randall Flagg is on it.


Baby, can you dig your man?
2014-04-03 03:09:35 PM
1 votes:

Stile4aly: Imaginativescreenname: Ok, according to The Hot Zone (Have it on the shelf right next to me!) , most if not all cases of Ebola and Marburg were traced back to one Kitum Cave. Why the FARK haven't they barricaded this thing or filled it in? Seriously, are they having group tours? "Over here on the right you'll see the bat-guano encrusted stalagtite that someone could have touched back in the late seventies and we think there's a possibility that MIGHT be where hiv came from... Please, no touching!"

Kitum Cave is Preston's hypothesis for the home of Marburg (not necessarily Ebola), but truth is that it's endemic is some population of animals and the host species hasn't been identified yet.  The prime candidate is a bat, but we haven't actually found it yet.  Let's grant for a minute that it is a bat.  If it's out in the wild and you seal up the cave where it lives, or where it migrates to, then it has to find somewhere else to live.  You would actually end up causing the vector to seek out a new niche which could potentially cause further spread of the virus.



Maybe release some Chinese needle snakes to eat the bats?

/ and Africa already has gorillas, so you've got the eventual snake problem covered before you even start
2014-04-03 02:43:35 PM
1 votes:

Deep Contact: youmightberight: Richard C Stanford: Well, time to build that decontamination chamber and start stockpiling food.
Figure the best way to survive an outbreak of Ebola would be to just quarantine yourself away from the outside world until it passes.
Am I correct, or am I missing something?

Nope that's a sound strategy - prep for 6 mo of food /water - also good idea to make your house look like it's got Ebola running rampant all over everything. Keeps the looters away.

Sprinkle some dead victims around your front lawn.


Yeah. The corpses should be able to pass through a sieve fairly easily for convenient sprinkling.
2014-04-03 02:42:48 PM
1 votes:
Well, he was getting tired of waiting around.

news.bbcimg.co.uk
2014-04-03 02:40:55 PM
1 votes:
Ok, according to The Hot Zone (Have it on the shelf right next to me!) , most if not all cases of Ebola and Marburg were traced back to one Kitum Cave. Why the FARK haven't they barricaded this thing or filled it in? Seriously, are they having group tours? "Over here on the right you'll see the bat-guano encrusted stalagtite that someone could have touched back in the late seventies and we think there's a possibility that MIGHT be where hiv came from... Please, no touching!"
2014-04-03 02:24:16 PM
1 votes:

patowen: Ebola is spread through physical contact.  Scary, but controllable.

Now when it mutates into an airborne pathogen - then we will have a bit of a problem.  At that point we may need to shut...down..everything!


I refer to that as going full Madagascar.
2014-04-03 02:16:40 PM
1 votes:

Yellow Beard: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeboooooooooooola

[upload.wikimedia.org image 850x637]


I laughed a bit too hard at that ....
2014-04-03 02:12:21 PM
1 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: ♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫


*shakes tiny fist*
2014-04-03 02:03:10 PM
1 votes:
bass players may be dumb, but i don't think they'd put their guitar in a blender
2014-04-03 01:59:54 PM
1 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: ♫ When you spleen liquifies
And blood squirts from your eyes
That's ebola... ♫


Get out of my head!
2014-04-03 01:48:18 PM
1 votes:
"....and she went home and told her mother I was a junkie."
 
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