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(Bustle)   If the Marvel Cinematic Universe is like Six Flags, then Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is like the kiddie pool they filled up for you in the backyard until you were old enough to drive yourself to the YMCA   ( bustle.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, S.H.I.E.L.D., swimming pools, backyards  
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2038 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 02 Apr 2014 at 1:59 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-02 12:13:37 PM  
And DC is a Dixie cup filled with piss and tobacco juice.
 
2014-04-02 12:16:14 PM  
Kind of mixing your metaphors there, aren't you?

Because Six Flags isn't a water park, wouldn't it make more sense to say something like "If the Marvel Cinematic Universe is like Six Flags, then Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is like the jagged edged tire swing in the backyard you used until you were old enough to drive yourself to the skate ramp."

But even that doesn't work, because Agents of SHIELD is actually PART of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  So, with that in mind, how about "If the Marvel Cinematic Universe is like Six Flags, then Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is like little antique cars that go around a fixed track really slowly and you wish the ride was over when you're only halfway through"?
 
2014-04-02 12:19:12 PM  
On another note, I'm sick of hearing about the f*cking "Bechdel test".  You know what women talk about when men aren't around?  They talk about men.  OK, and sometimes their jobs and their mothers.  But mostly men.
 
2014-04-02 12:21:01 PM  
Oh, and food.
B*tches love to talk food.
 
2014-04-02 12:39:27 PM  
I like Agents of Shield. It's not a great show but it's coming along nicely and is a fun little 44 minute show.


But I really feel sorry for the writers. Basically they were told "Here is this wonderful universe of stories and characters, but don't do anything too big or exciting because we have billion dollar movies going on and we don't want this little show messing with that. Specking of billion dollar projects, from time to time we are going to need to to shoe horn in a character or two so we can promote a new movie or DVD release, k?"

I really respect them for trying to make a show that everyone expects to be as awesome as a summer blockbuster film, without the budget or freedom to change cannon.
 
2014-04-02 12:43:06 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Kind of mixing your metaphors there, aren't you?

Because Six Flags isn't a water park, wouldn't it make more sense to say something like "If the Marvel Cinematic Universe is like Six Flags, then Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is like the jagged edged tire swing in the backyard you used until you were old enough to drive yourself to the skate ramp."

But even that doesn't work, because Agents of SHIELD is actually PART of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  So, with that in mind, how about "If the Marvel Cinematic Universe is like Six Flags, then Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D is like little antique cars that go around a fixed track really slowly and you wish the ride was over when you're only halfway through"?


Yes, yes! That's it exactly!
 
2014-04-02 01:02:41 PM  
You can't hit 'em all out of the park.

Need I remind everyone of Daredevil?
 
2014-04-02 01:39:06 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I like Agents of Shield. It's not a great show but it's coming along nicely and is a fun little 44 minute show.


But I really feel sorry for the writers. Basically they were told "Here is this wonderful universe of stories and characters, but don't do anything too big or exciting because we have billion dollar movies going on and we don't want this little show messing with that. Specking of billion dollar projects, from time to time we are going to need to to shoe horn in a character or two so we can promote a new movie or DVD release, k?"

I really respect them for trying to make a show that everyone expects to be as awesome as a summer blockbuster film, without the budget or freedom to change cannon.


I just hope the "everybody loves skye" angle is heading somewhere because I'm starting to despise her character. I find myself wishing more and more that they'd just kill her off.
 
2014-04-02 02:04:56 PM  
The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.
 
2014-04-02 02:05:27 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I like Agents of Shield. It's not a great show but it's coming along nicely and is a fun little 44 minute show.


But I really feel sorry for the writers. Basically they were told "Here is this wonderful universe of stories and characters, but don't do anything too big or exciting because we have billion dollar movies going on and we don't want this little show messing with that. Specking of billion dollar projects, from time to time we are going to need to to shoe horn in a character or two so we can promote a new movie or DVD release, k?"

I really respect them for trying to make a show that everyone expects to be as awesome as a summer blockbuster film, without the budget or freedom to change cannon.


I can't say I really feel sorry for them that much. Sure they have restrictions on what they can write about, but there's nothing preventing them from writing the characters with a bit of personality instead of cardboard cliches. Some of that is the quality of the acting or lack thereof with Ward and Skye, but the rest of the main characters seem to have capable actors, but are given shiat to work with.
 
2014-04-02 02:10:00 PM  
Most shows that lose over half their audience and cost a bucket of cash to make would be cancelled by this point, but I suspect ABC will bring it back for one more year, after some retooling.
 
2014-04-02 02:14:58 PM  
It's fine people. Can't we all just enjoy a decently average show. It's on it's way up in quality. It's cancel-proof because Disney, ABC, etc. is invested in the MCU and can use it to push upcoming films.

Invest now! Don't be a band-wagoner when it's amazing. Imagine the street cred when you say you watched it from the beginning!
 
2014-04-02 02:16:17 PM  

spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.


THIS. The whole premise of a weekly series is that it occur weekly. If Marvel and ABC can't manage to do this in a Oct.-May format, perhaps they should take a hint from some of the other more successful shows on cable networks and shorten their "season".
 
2014-04-02 02:16:37 PM  

Decillion: It's cancel-proof because Disney, ABC, etc. is invested in the MCU and can use it to push upcoming films.


Only if anyone is still watching.
 
2014-04-02 02:16:45 PM  
Watch Arrow, learn how to write a comic book TV show, and then kill Skye and Ward.
 
2014-04-02 02:19:25 PM  
I enjoyed last night's episode..it is getting better.
 
2014-04-02 02:19:53 PM  

Trocadero: Watch Arrow, learn how to write a comic book TV show, and then kill Skye and Ward.


Why? They haven't killed off Moira or Thea yet on Arrow. I can kinda agree with getting rid of Ward, but Skye as the audience surrogate isn't necessarily a bad idea, it's just that she's written very poorly with too much focus on her.
 
2014-04-02 02:26:52 PM  
I just watched the new episode this morning, as they actively hunt the 'Clairvoyant', and it was a heck of a ride. If the wait for new episodes was shorter, I'd have no complaints.
 
2014-04-02 02:27:51 PM  

Hebalo: Decillion: It's cancel-proof because Disney, ABC, etc. is invested in the MCU and can use it to push upcoming films.

Only if anyone is still watching.


True. But they have a few trump cards. If the show gets really good and people still don't come back to watch, then they have to bring in the big guns. The last of which is Robert Downey Jr. Unfortunately he's a one off. The story he's guest starring in better be damn good so they hold onto some of those viewers.
 
2014-04-02 02:28:01 PM  

spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.


Exactly.  If we were talking standalone episodes like with a sitcom it would be a different matter.
 
2014-04-02 02:29:01 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Because Six Flags isn't a water park,


Six Flags Atlantis was a water park in south Florida that operated from the early eighties until it was destroyed by hurricane Andrew. It was still a lame headline.

Here's the problem with sci-fi and comic based shows- the fans. Who wants to make a show for a bunch of whiny fanboys who will analyze every facet of your show and nitpick it to death?
 
2014-04-02 02:32:21 PM  
This show has three main problems:

1. The writers didn't make it truly episodic until the back half, leaving in lots of crappy "threat of the week" episodes in the front half that are boring and stupid.  The Thor tie-in was ridiculous and shouldn't even be called that.  The Lady Sif episode was a much better tie in.  The very second episode takes them off to a jungle to pick up a mcguffin that isn't a Marvel thing at all, just something they made up, and looked like a bad episode of the A-Team.  It was stupid planning.

2. Ward and Skye suck balls.  Seriously, Ward is a piece of wood on a good episode.  There's nothing interesting or deep about his character.  He'd be ok as the team's "heavy", except Agent May does that WAY better than him.  Skye is a typical Whedon magical girl, which is a trope that's getting really old at this point. She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out.  Because that happens a lot.  She can hack into SHIELD but needs Fitz or Simmons to explain basic science stuff to her.  Unless her hacking is part of her super powers, she's a ridiculous Mary Sue.

3. Scheduling - ok, I get the Olympics were something they had to work around, but they've had an inexcusably crappy scheduling outside of that.  They didn't need to take off two weeks between the last episode and this most recent one.  Not only does it kill any momentum the story might get, it just gets to the point that it's not worth waiting to see if it's new this week or not.  This show would have been much better as a Netflix series where they dump the whole season out there at once.  Had they done that, the weak episodes, of which there have been a lot, wouldn't be so glaring.  As it is, they take the wind right out of this series' sails.

I kind of hope it gets a second season and a major shakeup in writing crew and direction.  It needs help badly, and if they can't see that, then there's very little hope for this show other than relying on Disney keeping it around just because.
 
2014-04-02 02:33:09 PM  

Diogenes: spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.

Exactly.  If we were talking standalone episodes like with a sitcom it would be a different matter.


I think we're looking at this backwards. If the show was performing better, it wouldn't be getting bumped as much.
 
2014-04-02 02:33:14 PM  
(Starts to read the link) Meh, it's the same old whiny crap.
 
2014-04-02 02:33:17 PM  
With all the rest of the suck that DC puts out, they really should just hand over their writing to the Arrow team. And even with big name Whedons on Shield, it still lacks focus. I don't care about Ward or Skye either. She's getting some layers but I just can't feel anything for them.

Get rid of them, make it the wacky adventures of Mae, FitzSimmons and Coulson on the "bus", and I'll probably enjoy it more.
 
2014-04-02 02:38:03 PM  
AOS has committing the one unforgivable sin of entertainment- its boring. boring villians, boring good guys, boring sets and boring plots. look at arrow as a counter-example. its often campy and melodramatic. the acting is uneven and the camera work is often less than perfect... but its never boring and because of that it is a far better show.
 
2014-04-02 02:38:49 PM  

Diogenes: You can't hit 'em all out of the park.

Need I remind everyone of Daredevil?


That was FOX, not Marvel Movies.

/kinda liked DD
//except for the stupid playground scene
///didn't read DD as a kid, so no fond memories for it to crush
 
2014-04-02 02:40:58 PM  

Hebalo: Diogenes: spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.

Exactly.  If we were talking standalone episodes like with a sitcom it would be a different matter.

I think we're looking at this backwards. If the show was performing better, it wouldn't be getting bumped as much.


I'm not entirely convinced of that, but it's possible.

To determine that we'd first need to know the number episode they ordered for the first season.
 
2014-04-02 02:41:20 PM  

Dr. Whoof: She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out.


Hacking is not even her super power. Her old boyfriend taught her everything.
Lame.
 
2014-04-02 02:42:06 PM  

Dr. Whoof: 2. Ward and Skye suck balls. Seriously, Ward is a piece of wood on a good episode. There's nothing interesting or deep about his character. He'd be ok as the team's "heavy", except Agent May does that WAY better than him. Skye is a typical Whedon magical girl, which is a trope that's getting really old at this point. She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out. Because that happens a lot. She can hack into SHIELD but needs Fitz or Simmons to explain basic science stuff to her. Unless her hacking is part of her super powers, she's a ridiculous Mary Sue.


I get the Skye hate. When a couple of minutes "hacking" on your cell phone can get you access and invited to a very restricted and screened party on the big bad guy's island fortress I know we have problems.
But I don't get the Ward hate. He is bad arse Shield Agent. That's all he has that's all he knows. Yeah he is 2 dimensional he is suppose to be! He is the job and the job is him. Over time they will keep throwing things at him to soften him up
 
2014-04-02 02:42:50 PM  

tlchwi02: AOS has committing the one unforgivable sin of entertainment- its boring. boring villians, boring good guys, boring sets and boring plots. look at arrow as a counter-example. its often campy and melodramatic. the acting is uneven and the camera work is often less than perfect... but its never boring and because of that it is a far better show.


You haven't seen it in six months, have you?
 
2014-04-02 02:45:40 PM  

Diogenes: To determine that we'd first need to know the number episode they ordered for the first season.


IIRC, they ordered 12 and bumped it up to 22 a few weeks into the season.
 
2014-04-02 02:52:55 PM  
Did anyone actually watch last night?  I think the show is starting to find its footing, however late it is, and it's incredibly farking late.
 
2014-04-02 02:54:17 PM  
So now, when the show is reaching it's WTF just happend moment, and were asking ourselves can be trusted. Right at the point when they're about to reach the big cliff hanger that will bring season one to an end and we all have to wait till the fall to see how they escape. Now is when you're going to start biatching about the show?  Great timing subby.

I for one like the show for the most part and am looing forward to next weeks episode.
 
2014-04-02 02:58:06 PM  

Alphax: You haven't seen it in six months, have you?


i watched last nights episode. was bored. still don't have interesting hero's, villians or sets. the plot admittedly should be getting interesting, but i think the scheduleing is killing it. take the final 'shocker' ending there. that should have been compelling, but my reaction was 'finally, they only teased THAT happening what, 3 months ago?' But then i thought about it and realized it was only a few episodes ago.... but then i thought about it again and realized that WAS nearly 2 months ago. so i guess plot isn't fully the shows fault, but it doesn't change my overall opinion at this point
 
2014-04-02 02:58:37 PM  
I don't know what people must have been expecting for as much "hate" as the show has received.
Is it perfect...nope. But I'm enjoying it.  Considering it has no real budget for massive super powered battles, and we are dealing with 3rd rung players in the SHIELD universe, where its mostly creating its own mythos as it goes, so it's going to take at least a season or so to have enough other background (aside from some passing ties to the film franchises) until its established enough to have any real depth.
Don't like it?  fine...shut up and don't watch it.
but to keep watching just to keep biatching...congratulations on being part of the heard.

so far as the sporadic scheduling... most folks have DVRs these days, and the ability to watch it online if they choose.  as someone who regularly has to wait 6-8(or a year or more) months between "mid-season breaks"
or shiat... like 3 years+ between seasons of The Venture Brothers...biatching about this is biatching for the sake of biatching IMO.

as a Wheadon project goes...it could be worse...at least its not Dollhouse....that was just...awful.
 
2014-04-02 02:59:44 PM  

nitefallz: Did anyone actually watch last night?  I think the show is starting to find its footing, however late it is, and it's incredibly farking late.


I agree. The recent episode actually gave some depth to Ward for once. And it's cool that Winter Soldier is happening in the background, obviously screwing everything up.
 
2014-04-02 03:00:49 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Dr. Whoof: 2. Ward and Skye suck balls. Seriously, Ward is a piece of wood on a good episode. There's nothing interesting or deep about his character. He'd be ok as the team's "heavy", except Agent May does that WAY better than him. Skye is a typical Whedon magical girl, which is a trope that's getting really old at this point. She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out. Because that happens a lot. She can hack into SHIELD but needs Fitz or Simmons to explain basic science stuff to her. Unless her hacking is part of her super powers, she's a ridiculous Mary Sue.

I get the Skye hate. When a couple of minutes "hacking" on your cell phone can get you access and invited to a very restricted and screened party on the big bad guy's island fortress I know we have problems.
But I don't get the Ward hate. He is bad arse Shield Agent. That's all he has that's all he knows. Yeah he is 2 dimensional he is suppose to be! He is the job and the job is him. Over time they will keep throwing things at him to soften him up


Because they already have a stoic "Badass" SHIELD Agent character. One who can at least somewhat act and with an established reason behind her cold demeanor that makes sense. There's no need for both Ward and May to exist on the same team. That combined with his wooden acting make for loads of internet hate.
 
2014-04-02 03:03:52 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Dr. Whoof: 2. Ward and Skye suck balls. Seriously, Ward is a piece of wood on a good episode. There's nothing interesting or deep about his character. He'd be ok as the team's "heavy", except Agent May does that WAY better than him. Skye is a typical Whedon magical girl, which is a trope that's getting really old at this point. She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out. Because that happens a lot. She can hack into SHIELD but needs Fitz or Simmons to explain basic science stuff to her. Unless her hacking is part of her super powers, she's a ridiculous Mary Sue.

I get the Skye hate. When a couple of minutes "hacking" on your cell phone can get you access and invited to a very restricted and screened party on the big bad guy's island fortress I know we have problems.
But I don't get the Ward hate. He is bad arse Shield Agent. That's all he has that's all he knows. Yeah he is 2 dimensional he is suppose to be! He is the job and the job is him. Over time they will keep throwing things at him to soften him up

Because they already have a stoic "Badass" SHIELD Agent character. One who can at least somewhat act and with an established reason behind her cold demeanor that makes sense. There's no need for both Ward and May to exist on the same team. That combined with his wooden acting make for loads of internet hate.


That's it, you only need one?

Lame.
 
2014-04-02 03:04:15 PM  

spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that.


It's maddening.  I understand that's the old network way of thinking. But in today's world where people can watch a season's worth of shows on Netflix or know they can get behind an AMC or HBO series that never takes a week off during its scheduled run, it does nothing but turn off potential viewers.

I'm still a fan, but when the most exciting moment of the show is hearing "on next week's all-new Agents of SHIELD" it's not always easy.
 
2014-04-02 03:08:40 PM  

Dr. Whoof: Unless her hacking is part of her super powers


She IS an 084.
 
2014-04-02 03:10:39 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Because they already have a stoic "Badass" SHIELD Agent character. One who can at least somewhat act and with an established reason behind her cold demeanor that makes sense. There's no need for both Ward and May to exist on the same team. That combined with his wooden acting make for loads of internet hate.


I don't think May is going to be on the show for much longer. I don't think she was ever intentioned to be on the show past this part. Any way we need an equal number of techs to muscle so there you go. It's kind of hard to have May flying the Bus and leading the fire fight to get them to the Bus and you don't want your head agent doing all the heavy lifting. After May is gone either Skye is going to become some superpowered tank (oh lord please no) or they will get another field agent.

If Skye goes all Wonder Woman on us I'm out. eff you guys, I'm going home.
 
2014-04-02 03:14:01 PM  
QUESTION FOR THOSE WHO HAVE SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODE:

I have NOT read any comics (one of the few geek things I never got into), I have no idea what to expect from CA 2 and plan to see it this weekend. Should I hold off on watching my DVRd episode till AFTER I see CA 2?
 
2014-04-02 03:14:17 PM  

Alphax: Dingleberry Dickwad: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Dr. Whoof: 2. Ward and Skye suck balls. Seriously, Ward is a piece of wood on a good episode. There's nothing interesting or deep about his character. He'd be ok as the team's "heavy", except Agent May does that WAY better than him. Skye is a typical Whedon magical girl, which is a trope that's getting really old at this point. She's a super hacker who is a high school drop out. Because that happens a lot. She can hack into SHIELD but needs Fitz or Simmons to explain basic science stuff to her. Unless her hacking is part of her super powers, she's a ridiculous Mary Sue.

I get the Skye hate. When a couple of minutes "hacking" on your cell phone can get you access and invited to a very restricted and screened party on the big bad guy's island fortress I know we have problems.
But I don't get the Ward hate. He is bad arse Shield Agent. That's all he has that's all he knows. Yeah he is 2 dimensional he is suppose to be! He is the job and the job is him. Over time they will keep throwing things at him to soften him up

Because they already have a stoic "Badass" SHIELD Agent character. One who can at least somewhat act and with an established reason behind her cold demeanor that makes sense. There's no need for both Ward and May to exist on the same team. That combined with his wooden acting make for loads of internet hate.

That's it, you only need one?

Lame.


It would be different if they tried to make them separate types of badasses, but they don't. They're both pretty much exactly the same. Multiple badasses can be done, like Firefly did with Zoey and Jayne, but you'll notice Zoey and Jayne had very distinctive personalities and styles of badassness.
 
2014-04-02 03:16:52 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: QUESTION FOR THOSE WHO HAVE SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODE:

I have NOT read any comics (one of the few geek things I never got into), I have no idea what to expect from CA 2 and plan to see it this weekend. Should I hold off on watching my DVRd episode till AFTER I see CA 2?


I saw no obvious connection between last night's episode and Friday's movie. On the other hand, something might become obvious after the latter. Go ahead and watch.
 
2014-04-02 03:17:19 PM  

spacebar: The real problem with SHIELD is that ABC hasn't aired 3 consecutive episodes since November. Hard to maintain interest in a storyline with a farked up schedule like that. Skye


FTFY
 
2014-04-02 03:17:27 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: QUESTION FOR THOSE WHO HAVE SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODE:

I have NOT read any comics (one of the few geek things I never got into), I have no idea what to expect from CA 2 and plan to see it this weekend. Should I hold off on watching my DVRd episode till AFTER I see CA 2?


No. From what I can tell this most recent episode doesn't really tie in to CA2. If the episodes dealing with Asgardian stuff are any indicator, whatever tie in the show does will be after the movie premiers in the US. It should be safe to watch.
 
2014-04-02 03:17:55 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: I have NOT read any comics (one of the few geek things I never got into), I have no idea what to expect from CA 2 and plan to see it this weekend. Should I hold off on watching my DVRd episode till AFTER I see CA 2?


no..it ties (timeline wise) with cap 2. see it before.
/after reading the cap 2 movie wiki you will realize that AOS has been hugely influenced by cap 2. They are one and the same.
 
2014-04-02 03:20:29 PM  
oh...don't read the updated wiki on cap 2 if you haven't seen the movie and don't want spoilers.
/ yeah...it pretty much tells who the clairvoyant is in it.
 
2014-04-02 03:22:12 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: QUESTION FOR THOSE WHO HAVE SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODE:

I have NOT read any comics (one of the few geek things I never got into), I have no idea what to expect from CA 2 and plan to see it this weekend. Should I hold off on watching my DVRd episode till AFTER I see CA 2?


Last nights episode is fine to see before CA2. If anything it just sets the stage. But I've heard next week's may deal with aftermath.
 
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