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(KOB4)   What happens in Albuquerque 22 times in four years? No, not the NCAA tournament. No, not an award winning television show. Yup, police fatally shoot citizens   (kob.com) divider line 7
    More: Asinine, Albuquerque, NCAA, Justice Department, independent review, APD, tournaments, Sandia National Laboratories  
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3555 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Mar 2014 at 11:57 PM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-03-26 08:42:16 PM
5 votes:
Except for me.
You know why?

'Cause I had my tray table up.
And my seat back in the full upright position...
2014-03-27 12:01:47 AM
4 votes:
i1309.photobucket.com
2014-03-27 01:55:35 AM
2 votes:

Makh: Except for me.
You know why?

'Cause I had my tray table up.
And my seat back in the full upright position...


csb time

So I've just gotten home and ready to call it a day after a bit at work when my friend calls me up and says she's nearby and wants to do something because she missed out the previous day.  I'm kinda not in the mood until I remember that it's Thursday and we just got a dueling piano bar in town with no cover on Thursdays.  So I recommend, she's down, and we meet up there.

All starts out decent: couple of drinks, good natured sing along with easy songs.  She gets her go to song played and a few others played.   Then the drinks start kicking in and we start to get obscure.  We got them playing every little crazy thing we can think of: show toons, big band, jazz, blues, Tenacioud D, Johnny Cash, Royals, anything to challenge these guys.  Then all of a sudden she comes out with the part in Albuquerque that goes, 'if you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again'.   i'm psyched because 1) would never have guessed she'd know it, and 2) its the perfect challenge.

so I write the request and throw down a buck.  The guy reads it right away as its in between songs and comments with a laugh, 'for a dollar I'll do the minute version of Albequerque'  which I took as this guy will do ALL OF ALBEQUERQUE for the right price.  I bust out ten more bucks and tell the guy that we want every last second of Albequerque.

So he does.

He gets the melody going on the piano and gets the other guy to get a drum kit going on his piano, which he does.  Then he gets started, and this guy is committed and passionate about getting this song done to perfection.

Sauerkraut part comes and he belts it out perfectly.   AHHHH BIG BOWL OF SAUERKRAUT! EVERY SINGLE MORNING!

And we were going crazy right along with him.  He gets to the big fat hermaphrodite with a flock of seagulls haircut and only one nostril and I'm narrating right along with like an idiot.  He steals a snorkel and they tussle and in the middle of it the phone gets knocked off the hook.  And when that familiar voice came around, we all sang...

IF YOU'D LIKE TO MAKE A CALL, PLEASE HANG UP AND TRY AGAIN!  IF YOU NEED HELP HANG UP AND THEN DIAL YOUR OOOPERATOR!
IF YOU'D LIKE TO MAKE A CALL, PLEASE HANG UP AND TRY AGAIN!  IF YOU NEED HELP HANG UP AND THEN DIAL YOUR OOOPERATOR!

Best 11 dollars ever spent in the history of ever.

/A
//L
///B
////U
////QUERQUE!
/CSB
2014-03-27 12:17:17 AM
2 votes:
I guess the gun control lobby couldn't quite get them to make a left turn in Albuquerque.
2014-03-27 12:01:01 AM
2 votes:
Damn, so Walter White would have probably been shot in season three for having a cracked windshield and mouthing off to the cop?
2014-03-27 07:13:49 AM
1 votes:
Flragnararch: dueling piano csb

The piano player was coming back from a restroom break when I asked him, "Do you know your zipper's open and your dick is hanging out?"

He looked at me and grinned, "Know it? I wrote it!"
2014-03-27 02:29:22 AM
1 votes:
Flragnararch: dueling piano csb

one time a buddy requested a "dying fetus" song for $3 and the guy said "We need at least $10 to play some dying fetus". good times.
 
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