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(Huffington Post)   You other brothers can't deny 19 very real struggles of women with big butts   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 131
    More: Stupid, Baby Got Back  
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11104 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Mar 2014 at 1:52 PM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



131 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-26 12:31:53 PM  
They left out "Swamp Ass from incomplete wiping"

Power wash dat ass.. It's the only way to be sure.
 
2014-03-26 12:56:12 PM  
Go be fat somewhere else.
 
2014-03-26 12:57:40 PM  
Has one of those lists with gifs in the middle of them EVER been funny?
 
2014-03-26 01:21:10 PM  
This article isn't worth a Mix-a-Lot reference!
 
2014-03-26 01:43:34 PM  
List fails without "harpoon removal"
 
2014-03-26 01:54:05 PM  
I'm afraid of placing a bookmark in this thread for fear it will be crushed.
 
2014-03-26 01:56:21 PM  
Sprung, I was not.
 
2014-03-26 01:56:38 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Has one of those lists with gifs in the middle of them EVER been funny?


There were a few once but then someone made a list of them and they stopped being funny.
 
2014-03-26 01:56:44 PM  
When you sit around the house, you sit AROUND the house?
 
2014-03-26 01:57:07 PM  
Tag choice is pure excellence.
 
2014-03-26 01:57:08 PM  
Hey, you got Buzzfeed in my Huffington Post!
 
2014-03-26 01:57:57 PM  
They sound fat... I've worked with several women with prominent posteriors, but who weren't obese and they never really had to do much around here.
 
2014-03-26 01:58:17 PM  

EvilEgg: Go be fat somewhere else.


images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-03-26 01:58:51 PM  
I'm endlessly astounded that someone draws a paycheck for this shiat.
 
2014-03-26 01:59:14 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Has one of those lists with gifs in the middle of them EVER been funny?


I found the Corgi twerking to be kinda funny....
 
2014-03-26 01:59:39 PM  
Problems don't get much more first world than that
 
2014-03-26 01:59:53 PM  
*...please let the comments contradict the crappiness of that article. Please, please, please...*
 
2014-03-26 02:00:27 PM  

HotWingConspiracy: I'm endlessly astounded that someone draws a paycheck for this shiat.


I was astounded that the top comment is from Nina Hartley.
 
2014-03-26 02:01:13 PM  
I like girls with big butts, it's like they have built in pillows.
 
2014-03-26 02:01:54 PM  
I like big butts.

www.abc.net.au
 
2014-03-26 02:02:20 PM  
The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A Squat booty is a gift from above and was the reason reverse cowgirl was invented
 
2014-03-26 02:02:28 PM  
Well, now what are talking here? A woman with a big ass or a big ass woman?

/who drank my apple juice
 
2014-03-26 02:02:38 PM  
/likes dat ass
//if attached to the right woman
///drtfa
 
2014-03-26 02:02:40 PM  

RedfordRenegade: I like girls with big butts, it's like they have built in pillows.


Earmuffs.
 
2014-03-26 02:03:05 PM  
14. Drunk friends have tried to balance drinks on your behind.

Heh. I do that to a friend of mine while sober. She's not fat, she's just got a big ol butt.
 
2014-03-26 02:03:57 PM  
Needs more treadmill.
 
2014-03-26 02:04:08 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Has one of those lists with gifs in the middle of them EVER been funny?


Evidence would argue "no".
 
2014-03-26 02:04:11 PM  

RedfordRenegade: I like girls with big butts, it's like they have built in pillows.


and you wouldn't LIE now would you?
 
2014-03-26 02:04:23 PM  

p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A Squat booty is a gift from above and was the reason reverse cowgirl was invented


Hmmmm, Alexis Texas cums to mind......
 
2014-03-26 02:05:40 PM  

RedfordRenegade: I like girls with big butts, it's like they have built in pillows.


cdn.wwtdd.com
 
2014-03-26 02:05:58 PM  
Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
media.salon.com
 
2014-03-26 02:06:12 PM  
 
2014-03-26 02:07:04 PM  

p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.


global3.memecdn.com


A Squat booty is a gift from above and was the reason reverse cowgirl was invented


devilsfoe.com
 
2014-03-26 02:08:14 PM  

MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]


Yeah I'm sure that chick gets has to deal with a lot of people calling her a fat ass. What an odd ad.
 
2014-03-26 02:08:38 PM  
www.nbssportfishing.com
fattony.transworld.net
ohn1.slausworks.netdna-cdn.com
 
2014-03-26 02:09:30 PM  

MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]


TIL: Nike doesn't know how to spell "ambassador."
 
2014-03-26 02:09:45 PM  
What this author's butt may look like:

i57.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-26 02:09:57 PM  
The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?
 
2014-03-26 02:10:51 PM  
Hot chicks with big butts.

i.imgur.com


i.imgur.comi.imgur.com

 
2014-03-26 02:11:00 PM  
Yeah, but women with big butts get the most honest guys.

/they cannot lie
 
2014-03-26 02:14:04 PM  

elysive: The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?



How YOU doin?
 
2014-03-26 02:14:38 PM  

MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]


"Embassador?"  Really?
 
2014-03-26 02:15:02 PM  

Skail: MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]

"Embassador?"  Really?


I'm going with "fake spec ad".
 
2014-03-26 02:15:18 PM  
i3.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-03-26 02:17:13 PM  

p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.


A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.
 
2014-03-26 02:17:33 PM  

elysive: The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?


You sound fat.  What you doing Friday after work?

/not me right?
 
2014-03-26 02:17:58 PM  
My wife has a big ass, and I'm really getting a kick out of some of these posts.
 
2014-03-26 02:19:01 PM  

Uzzah


MooseBayou: Hmmm. Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]

TIL: Nike doesn't know how to spell "ambassador."


And they think that "ten thousand lunges has" is grammatically correct.


They should be ambarrassed.
 
2014-03-26 02:21:31 PM  

Lettuce Pray: [i3.kym-cdn.com image 300x287]


LOL, I was gonna look for that image. I once had a guy follow me down the street saying "mmm", grunting and repeatedly sucking noisily on his lip like that. My ass/overall bod was not that impressive. The behavior was flattering but gross. I didnt go out with him.

/and yea it wasnt the best neighborhood
//having a big butt was a social burden in Chicagoo
 
2014-03-26 02:21:35 PM  

eyemarten: When you sit around the house, you sit AROUND the house?


blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com
 
2014-03-26 02:24:25 PM  

Barricaded Gunman: p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.


Growing a large set of fat globs is not impressive. I'll never get why certain people are proud of being fat.
 
2014-03-26 02:24:31 PM  
#20. Diabetes
 
2014-03-26 02:26:01 PM  

EvilEgg: Go be fat somewhere else.


Here here

This is Yes

absgirls.files.wordpress.com

This is No

aka.weightwatchers.com
 
2014-03-26 02:27:11 PM  

RedfordRenegade: elysive: The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?

You sound fat.  What you doing Friday after work?

/not me right?


I was fat, but not anymore. I got a lot more attention when I was heavier. Strangely the booty got more pronounced with exercise, but then I also became a more aloof biatch. *shrug*
 
2014-03-26 02:31:29 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: EvilEgg: Go be fat somewhere else.

Here here

This is Yes

[absgirls.files.wordpress.com image 555x800]

This is No

[aka.weightwatchers.com image 216x216]


Crap, apparently for me sometimes, no does mean yes.
 
2014-03-26 02:35:09 PM  
I was getting a mild chuckle from some of the items on the list, but when I got to 17 I lost it:

17. Before smartphones, you butt-dialed everyone you knew on a regular basis.
 
2014-03-26 02:37:50 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: Well, now what are talking here? A woman with a big ass or a big ass woman?

/who drank my apple juice


A big-ass woman, or a big ass-woman?

womens come in all sizes, don't limit yourself.
 
2014-03-26 02:38:13 PM  
i1.ytimg.com

Everyone I know has a big butt...
 
2014-03-26 02:38:41 PM  
How is it that some women can get huge gigantic fat asses but their upper bodies are almost normal?
 
2014-03-26 02:39:39 PM  

Uzzah: MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]

TIL: Nike doesn't know how to spell "ambassador."

 
2014-03-26 02:39:42 PM  
I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.
 
2014-03-26 02:41:59 PM  

Rev. Skarekroe: Has one of those lists with gifs in the middle of them EVER been funny?


Only if it involves kittens or puppies.
 
2014-03-26 02:42:56 PM  

RedfordRenegade: I like girls with big butts, it's like they have built in pillows.


PILLOWS!?  Really?  Do you really think girls don't fart?  I wouldn't sleep on it.  Now spooning is much better if she has assets.
 
2014-03-26 02:42:57 PM  

Valiente: Also, really...am I the first?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfhphrmKdsg&feature=kp


I was hoping someone would make a reference.

/"Fat bottom girls" is a good video as well.
 
2014-03-26 02:43:43 PM  

global3.memecdn.com

 
2014-03-26 02:44:19 PM  

Nurglitch: I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.


gunt?
 
2014-03-26 02:47:05 PM  

bikerbob59: gunt?


For your sake, don't GIS it. Unless I don't like you, in which case, search away!
 
2014-03-26 02:47:22 PM  

bikerbob59: Nurglitch: I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.

gunt?


Gut + another word that ends with unt.
 
2014-03-26 02:47:28 PM  

bikerbob59: Nurglitch: I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.

gunt?


A word you can't unlearn. Enjoy your nightmares.
 
2014-03-26 02:47:42 PM  

bikerbob59: Nurglitch: I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.

gunt?


Combination of gut and kunt.
 
2014-03-26 02:48:22 PM  

Barricaded Gunman: p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.


It's like skinny guys with abs. Fat girls with big boobs don't count.
 
2014-03-26 02:48:47 PM  
The woman I'm seeing has a tiny waist but a really big butt and thighs. It's very attractive, that's all. I just wanted to brag.
 
2014-03-26 02:48:52 PM  

bikerbob59: gunt?


Also known as FUPA
 
2014-03-26 02:50:26 PM  

markie_farkie: bikerbob59: gunt?

Also known as FUPA


Or the udder over.
 
2014-03-26 02:52:13 PM  

Boojum2k: bikerbob59: gunt?

For your sake, don't GIS it. Unless I don't like you, in which case, search away!


Or FOPA with a long "o"
 
2014-03-26 02:53:36 PM  
i.imgur.com

i.imgur.com

i.imgur.com

i.imgur.com


Some men understand your pain.
 
2014-03-26 02:54:23 PM  
Wasn't The Huffington Post once a legitimate news source? Am I remembering incorrectly?
 
2014-03-26 02:55:41 PM  

weltallica: [i.imgur.com image 640x505]

[i.imgur.com image 640x289]

[i.imgur.com image 640x478]

[i.imgur.com image 640x524]


Some men understand your pain.


Not you, though, right?

/I keed
 
2014-03-26 02:57:20 PM  
There is a difference between "big butt" and "fat ass". Those sound like "fat ass" problems.
 
2014-03-26 02:58:18 PM  
I don't have a big ass.  I'm a giant asshole with a little ass to go around
 
2014-03-26 02:59:06 PM  

weltallica: [i.imgur.com image 640x505]

[i.imgur.com image 640x289]

[i.imgur.com image 640x478]

[i.imgur.com image 640x524]


Some men understand your pain.


LOL, reminds me of reading savage love one day.  Some guy writes in saying his dick is so big it hurts his gf and he can't go for more than a few minutes without her telling him to stop.  You could basically read his tears and angst.  Dan's reply was similar, oh poor you, you have a huge dick, ohhh whoa's you.  *then the real advice came*
 
2014-03-26 03:01:14 PM  

EvilEgg: bikerbob59: Nurglitch: I like fat chicks, gunts and all, but I also like a big, muscular rear bumper. It's a conundrum.

gunt?

Gut + another word that ends with unt.



Discount?
Stunt?
Remount?
Recount?
Flaunt?
Amount?
Tantamount?
Hunt?
Paramount?
Brunt?
Mount?
Account?


WHAT DO YOU MEAN MAN??!?!!!??
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-03-26 03:01:47 PM  
Next up on Gerardo.. big boob problems.  The most interesting segment in decades.
 
2014-03-26 03:07:36 PM  
If you can measure it using ax handles, it might be too big
 
2014-03-26 03:10:03 PM  
Did anyone notice the name of the second author?

/heh
 
2014-03-26 03:10:41 PM  
After having a G/F with a genetically gifted 'dat ass' for two years now, I can never go back.   The fetish is complete.   And I love, love love it.

-M
 
2014-03-26 03:11:55 PM  

jst3p: There is a difference between "big butt" and "fat ass". Those sound like "fat ass" problems.


This.

My wife has a wonderful butt. Great thigh to butt to waist ratio. Getting a kick out of the comments here.
 
2014-03-26 03:14:39 PM  
i242.photobucket.com

Does not equal


cdn.funnie.st
 
2014-03-26 03:22:46 PM  

MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]


That's a normal butt.
 
2014-03-26 03:24:42 PM  
Once you get older, it is not about the size of the butt, but how excited she is about sharing it with you, and how appreciative you are of with this gift.

/wife has the most beautiful butt in the world.  And it is all mine.
 
2014-03-26 03:25:24 PM  
I have Noasitol disease...

Somewhere between my shoulder blades and my ankles some sort of divergence happens, and my legs are just......there.
 
2014-03-26 03:27:12 PM  
I generally prefer a plump woman. But only if she likes it too.
 
2014-03-26 03:28:51 PM  

Wellon Dowd: Hot chicks with big butts.[i.imgur.com image 307x512]
[i.imgur.com image 400x650][i.imgur.com image 223x650]


I recognize the first two...butt who is the 3rd one?

/mmm...Remy
 
2014-03-26 03:34:26 PM  

Kiler: I recognize the first two...butt who is the 3rd one?

/mmm...Remy


Sofia Sutra
 
2014-03-26 03:35:16 PM  

Valiente: markie_farkie: bikerbob59: gunt?

Also known as FUPA

Or the udder over.


And I was doing so well keeping silent at my desk, you bastard.
 
2014-03-26 03:42:41 PM  

noblewolf: [i242.photobucket.com image 480x395]

Does not equal


[cdn.funnie.st image 500x666]


s2.quickmeme.com
 
2014-03-26 03:42:50 PM  
#20 You cannot put down the fork.
 
2014-03-26 03:43:02 PM  
I was in Milan working as a lowly "gopher" for a fashion magazine. Despite my status, I was allowed to attend lavish parties and fashion shows. During one event, an attractive woman happened to catch my eye. She had luxurious blonde hair that danced on her shoulders whenever she would turn her head. Her toned, sexy legs and an incredible ripe peach of an ass were mesmerizing.

Summoning my courage and finishing off my Manhattan, I approached her from across the ballroom. I awkwardly introduced myself and asked her what her name was. Impressed by my confidence, she smiled and replied "Naomi" in a voice that was both alluring and innocent. She told me she knew who I was, which made me very embarrassed as I am usually a very humble gentleman and not boastful.

We began to make small talk. I could tell that she was very interested. I felt it was time to make my move. Trying to be both charming and suggestive, I paid her the ultimate compliment a man can give a woman and I could tell by the way she reacted that she was turned on and totally into it. Her mind might have been saying no but her body was definitely saying yes - I called for a cab.

Returning to my hotel room, I was in bliss. I set the stage for a night of romance - candlelight, champagne chilling on ice, soft music, erotic oils. The scene was set.  The time for lovemaking was upon us and I have to tell you, it was mind-blowing. I have never met a more capable and complimentary partner for the pursuit of carnal fulfillment. It was almost as if we inhabited the same mind, body and soul. My lover knew exactly what to do at exactly right moment. She slowly began to remove her pants - so tight, she rolled onto her stomach and arched upward to reduce friction enough to pull them away to reveal the roundest, firmest...

s2.hubimg.com

The end.
 
2014-03-26 03:48:37 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: EvilEgg: Go be fat somewhere else.

Here here

This is Yes

[absgirls.files.wordpress.com image 555x800]

This is No

[aka.weightwatchers.com image 216x216]


I came across a slideshow of pictures of her. . . and tried submitting it.  Did not get greenlit.  And I wasn't the first to submit the link!  They should have some sort of automatically accepted links (like slideshows of very hot pole vaulters).
 
2014-03-26 03:49:49 PM  

randomX: Wasn't The Huffington Post once a legitimate news source? Am I remembering incorrectly?


They won a Pulitzer in 2010 for their expose of shallow toilet bowls and the dangers of dipping your dong in the water when you sit down to take a crap.
 
2014-03-26 03:57:50 PM  

randomX: Wasn't The Huffington Post once a legitimate news source? Am I remembering incorrectly?


NO it never was and yes you are remebering it incorrectly
 
2014-03-26 04:01:23 PM  

Ablejack: I generally prefer a plump woman. But only if she likes it too.


This. I like me some big gals with big fat asses.
 
2014-03-26 04:02:54 PM  

SkorzenyNinja: Ablejack: I generally prefer a plump woman. But only if she likes it too.

This. I like me some big gals with big fat asses.


The kind that make you tell the biatch "just dance"?

/obscure?
 
2014-03-26 04:18:41 PM  
#20- Breaking Toilet Seats
 
2014-03-26 04:30:42 PM  
FTFA: "16. You can't even think about wearing spandex shorts to the gym."

Yes. Yes you can think about wearing spandex shorts to the gym. You can even do it, if you so desire. Oh hell yes. I'll think about it for you if you can't. A lot. But please think about it.

/please?
 
2014-03-26 04:59:24 PM  
 
2014-03-26 05:22:17 PM  
I have the opposite issue with dress length. Big boobs, flat butt.
 
2014-03-26 05:23:10 PM  

Uzzah: MooseBayou: Hmmm.  Have to think about this for a while, before making any rash decisions.
[media.salon.com image 750x500]

TIL: Nike doesn't know how to spell "ambassador."


It's not their fault, it's whoever they stole that from.
 
2014-03-26 05:28:11 PM  

elysive: The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?


Since when do they make clothes for chicks with jumbo tits that don't look like a pornstar outfit or something a drag queen would wear?

/men's tshirts, hoodies, etc..
//38G
 
2014-03-26 05:35:30 PM  

homarjr: Barricaded Gunman: p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.

It's like skinny guys with abs. Fat girls with big boobs don't count.


I had big tits before i got fat. When i'm slim, the're about a DD, when i'm big they're a G. Always a 38 around the bust though. No backfat thank FSM.
 
2014-03-26 05:40:50 PM  
The headline seems to be written in some sort of ghetto pidgeon. ¡No comprendo!
 
2014-03-26 05:51:42 PM  
As a man who appreciates ample buttocks, I must say... this thread is woefully lacking.  Perhaps the farkettes don't want to display them in public.

If that's the case, then they are welcome to send AIE (Ass In Email) to me.  EIP.
 
2014-03-26 06:41:47 PM  

dopekitty74: I have the opposite issue with dress length. Big boobs, flat butt.


Damn it, why is it that most women either get one or the other?

I'm scrawny and flat-chested, but with an inexplicable bubble butt.

Is there some rule that a woman can only have a truly impressive rack or ass, but not both?
 
2014-03-26 06:53:24 PM  

dopekitty74: homarjr: Barricaded Gunman: p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.

It's like skinny guys with abs. Fat girls with big boobs don't count.

I had big tits before i got fat. When i'm slim, the're about a DD, when i'm big they're a G. Always a 38 around the bust though. No backfat thank FSM.


data3.whicdn.com
 
2014-03-26 07:23:05 PM  

Geoff Peterson: Valiente: markie_farkie: bikerbob59: gunt?

Also known as FUPA

Or the udder over.

And I was doing so well keeping silent at my desk, you bastard.


I'm the Johnny Appleseed of cubicular disruption. It's the freelancer's revenge. That and not having to commute and writing off my utilities, subscriptions and home repairs.
 
2014-03-26 07:25:22 PM  

dogawful: http://www.gunt.de/static/s1_1.php


Biogas plant, indeed.
 
2014-03-26 07:30:38 PM  

Midrissa: dopekitty74: I have the opposite issue with dress length. Big boobs, flat butt.

Damn it, why is it that most women either get one or the other?

I'm scrawny and flat-chested, but with an inexplicable bubble butt.

Is there some rule that a woman can only have a truly impressive rack or ass, but not both?


No, but there's a sort of evolutionary imperative with the bubble butt, flat-chested thing. My missus is five foot, one half inch on a day with high humidity but sports a 36 inch backside you could rest a beverage on. Seriously, it's almost African, which is startling to find in a 75% Scotswoman. But her breast are at best a generous A.

Here's the payoff, however. She's almost 40 and despite nearly two years of nursing, those wee treasures are just about at perky as when we met when she was 19.

Yes, I know I won the lottery. I try to spend it wisely.

Breasts are transitory. A nice backside can last until the embers cool, and even then...the embers never cool completely.
 
2014-03-26 08:13:09 PM  

elgrancerdo: Once you get older, it is not about the size of the butt, but how excited she is about sharing it with you, and how appreciative you are of with this gift.

/wife has the most beautiful butt in the world.  And it is all mine.


You are only renting.
 
2014-03-26 08:20:34 PM  

DreamSnipers: elgrancerdo: Once you get older, it is not about the size of the butt, but how excited she is about sharing it with you, and how appreciative you are of with this gift.

/wife has the most beautiful butt in the world.  And it is all mine.

You are only renting.


Beware of double booking.
 
2014-03-26 09:48:31 PM  
Has anyone pointed out that one of the authors is named Alanna Vagianos?
 
2014-03-26 10:29:47 PM  

elysive: The only reasonable items from that list were the pants fitting and finding bikinis that fit both your top and bottom. Oh, and men do say obnoxious shiat but I've never heard a body part compared to "pillows"on the street.

Why do the major clothing manufacturers seem to only make clothes for women with chicken legs and giant gunts/tatas?


I can't count how many times men (and a few women) have made that exact comment to me.  Or asked if they could use my ass for a pillow.  I had a boyfriend whose favorite TV watching position was nestled against my rump.    As lame as that 'article' was, most of the items on the list are at least in the neighborhood of accurate.  I grew up riding horses competitively and weight trained 5 days a week.

I have a firm round bubble ass that usually gets me way more attention than I am comfortable with, but now that I am older, I try to ignore it for the most part.  I still weight train 3 days a week and keep up pretty well in the gym with my son, who plays HS football.
 
2014-03-26 10:58:09 PM  

Brockalisk: dopekitty74: homarjr: Barricaded Gunman: p the boiler: The issue I see is this: Girls who workout and have squat bodies often have women who do not work out and have fat booties trying to be compared to them.

A correlative to this phenomenon would be those big, greasy blob women who humble-brag about having "large" breasts. Cup size isn't everything... if they're resting on a shelf made of your gunt, it doesn't matter how large they are.

It's like skinny guys with abs. Fat girls with big boobs don't count.

I had big tits before i got fat. When i'm slim, the're about a DD, when i'm big they're a G. Always a 38 around the bust though. No backfat thank FSM.


Bwaahahah!! That was my profile pic for a while on fetlife of all places. Now i have cheryl from archer
 
2014-03-26 11:04:25 PM  

The Pope of Manwich Village: She slowly began to remove her pants - so tight, she rolled onto her stomach and arched upward to reduce friction enough to pull them away to reveal the roundest, firmest...


Is that a pimple or a boil?
 
2014-03-26 11:07:36 PM  
We need to find a better word than "big" to describe body parts that we prefer to be larger relative to the rest of the body.  Too often fat chicks declare themselves to have big boobs or a big booty.  No, you're just fat.  There is a difference.
 
2014-03-26 11:13:21 PM  

serial_crusher: The Pope of Manwich Village: She slowly began to remove her pants - so tight, she rolled onto her stomach and arched upward to reduce friction enough to pull them away to reveal the roundest, firmest...

Is that a pimple or a boil?


Zoster.
 
2014-03-26 11:22:12 PM  

dopekitty74: Since when do they make clothes for chicks with jumbo tits that don't look like a pornstar outfit or something a drag queen would wear?

/men's tshirts, hoodies, etc..
//38G


How YOU doin'? ;)
 
2014-03-26 11:38:40 PM  

serial_crusher: The Pope of Manwich Village: She slowly began to remove her pants - so tight, she rolled onto her stomach and arched upward to reduce friction enough to pull them away to reveal the roundest, firmest...

Is that a pimple or a boil?


It was some kind of European hybrid.

I stole the whole plot from Penthouse Forum and added the image to show how even the nicest booty can be diminished by asscne or other cosmetic flaw. At best, distracting. At worst, bonerkill.
 
2014-03-27 01:28:03 AM  

Eriond: dopekitty74: Since when do they make clothes for chicks with jumbo tits that don't look like a pornstar outfit or something a drag queen would wear?

/men's tshirts, hoodies, etc..
//38G

How YOU doin'? ;)


Hmmm.. Email addy worked this time. Check your email
 
2014-03-27 10:16:23 AM  

dopekitty74: Eriond: dopekitty74: Since when do they make clothes for chicks with jumbo tits that don't look like a pornstar outfit or something a drag queen would wear?

/men's tshirts, hoodies, etc..
//38G

How YOU doin'? ;)

Hmmm.. Email addy worked this time. Check your email


It's a well known fact that you can get pics of Cheryl from Archer online.

/just in case... eip if there are *naked* pics.
 
2014-03-27 11:57:19 AM  

kcfarker: dopekitty74: Eriond: dopekitty74: Since when do they make clothes for chicks with jumbo tits that don't look like a pornstar outfit or something a drag queen would wear?

/men's tshirts, hoodies, etc..
//38G

How YOU doin'? ;)

Hmmm.. Email addy worked this time. Check your email

It's a well known fact that you can get pics of Cheryl from Archer online.

/just in case... eip if there are *naked* pics.


*Highly suggestive* is fine by me as well.

/EIP
 
2014-03-27 01:05:40 PM  
thread buttmarked bookmarked
 
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