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(The New York Times)   Hasbro opens up Monopoly rules for modifications. Article to the left, your Fark suggestions for new rules to the right. Tag is in memory of the best game piece   (nytimes.com) divider line 171
    More: Ironic  
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1578 clicks; posted to Geek » on 25 Mar 2014 at 1:59 PM (35 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-25 11:50:24 AM  
The only way to win is to not play at all...
 
2014-03-25 11:57:55 AM  
FTA:

"While the official Monopoly rules will not change," the company said in a statement, "fans who love playing with 'house rules' will now have the opportunity to play them in their game."

I'm no expert, but I think people are doing this already.
 
2014-03-25 12:02:41 PM  
There should be a Socialist Uprising/Wealth Redistribution Chance card.

"Should any emergency arise which is not covered by the rules of the game," Magie's 1904 patent reads, "the players must settle the matter between themselves."

Pistols at dawn it is.
 
2014-03-25 12:05:21 PM  
We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.
 
2014-03-25 12:07:34 PM  
Three words: capital gains taxes.
 
2014-03-25 12:11:36 PM  
Taxes would be an interesting addition to the game

Also, Trust Busting would be an interesting addition, too
 
2014-03-25 12:27:09 PM  
They should make a Tea Party version...

Chance:  "ACA Mandate! Place all game pieces in center of game board and light it on fire."
 
2014-03-25 12:30:24 PM  
I want a rule that everyone has to follow the rules.

Like THAT will ever happen.
 
2014-03-25 12:30:59 PM  
I think a little Sharia law would help the game.  If you get caught stealing in the game you have your hands chopped off.  Simple enough.
 
2014-03-25 12:35:02 PM  
Obviously you play for real money and let a Casino be the banker. They're contractually obligated not to steal.
 
2014-03-25 12:36:00 PM  

PainInTheASP: Three words: capital gains taxes.


There already is a luxury tax, but it can hit anyone who is unfortunate to get the card. Tycoons can get put in jail, but so can the poor people.
 
2014-03-25 12:41:41 PM  
Hardly anyone plays by the rules, which is why they find it boring. Auctions speed the game up immeasurably and inject some good competition.

"House Rules" exist because people start playing as kids, and the game is designed for people with a rudimentary understanding of finance.  Unfortunately, no one bothers to look at the rules once they grow up - and if they do, the reaction is generally a Homer-Simpson-esque "Tooooo harrrrrd. Rules bad.  Pile of money good."
 
2014-03-25 12:44:54 PM  

Speaker2Animals: Tycoons can get put in jail, but so can the poor people.


That doesn't seem realistic.
 
2014-03-25 12:48:39 PM  

impaler: Speaker2Animals: Tycoons can get put in jail, but so can the poor people.

That doesn't seem realistic.


It does. The Tycoons can usually buy a Get Out of Jail Free card.
 
2014-03-25 12:49:50 PM  
Free Parking rules.
 
2014-03-25 12:52:40 PM  
Meh, I don't think we ever actually finished a game. Usually someone would get pissed off and walk away and everyone would lose interest at that point.

/Also never actually played a game of Mouse Trap even though I had it for years
//Would just set it up to try and trap my army guys in various ways
 
2014-03-25 12:53:35 PM  

Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.


It's not, but a common house rule. My family also played with "racing." If two (or more) players were on the same spot, they could ante up $100 and whoever passed that spot first after going around the board got the money (going to jail was a loss, community chests were fine).

Also, the best piece was the horse and rider, followed by the dog and then the car.
 
2014-03-25 12:55:29 PM  
How to Play Monopoly in the Most Enjoyable Way Possible:

Friend: "Let's play Monopoly!"

You: "Great idea! Get the board out and set it up!"

[Friend gets board out and sets it up]

You: "Cool! Let's start!"

[flip board over and scatter pieces all over the room]

You: "Whoo! That was fun! Good game!"
 
2014-03-25 12:55:34 PM  

Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.


That screws up the game so bad.  I wonder how that "rule" came into play.

The real rules work very well for short games that keep everyone in the game until nearly the end.
 
2014-03-25 12:56:43 PM  

cman: Taxes would be an interesting addition to the game


There's a number of taxes already.  $75 if you land on "Luxury Tax" between Park Place and Boardwalk, 10% of your cash or $200 if you land on the Income Tax square a few squares past "Go," and a bunch of taxes and assessments in the Chance and Community Chest cards, even including the "Pay Poor Tax of $15" card.  I like how Monopoly makes sure that the Poors are specially taxed--Mitt Romney would approve!
 
2014-03-25 12:58:48 PM  
Blowjobs are acceptable payment if you don't have enough money to make rent.

Just like when I was in college.
 
2014-03-25 01:00:23 PM  
If you draw the "Pay for Improvements to your Property" card you can choose to do a shot of Wild Turkey for each house and a tumbler of Tortilla Gold Tequila for each hotel.
 
2014-03-25 01:00:54 PM  

Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.


Putting money in the middle is a large part of the reason why Monopoly games last 17 years on average.  First, there not not be so much extra money injected into the game by random chance (that's why the bank error is $75, and making it around the board is only $200).  Second, all of the fines and such are meant to leave the game via the bank.  Keeping that money around by putting it in the center and letting free-parking pick it up keeps additional money in the game that shouldn't be.  With that much extra money kicking around, it becomes less and less likely that someone will actually go broke, and thus be out of the game, which means that the game will end at some point!
 
2014-03-25 01:04:08 PM  
The real important thing to know is that Solar Quest is, in all respects, a better version of Monopoly.
 
2014-03-25 01:08:07 PM  

Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.


The problem with that is that Monopoly games, which can be long even under the best of circumstances, last foooooooooorrrrrreeeeeeever with that rule, or with any other rules that take extra cash out of the bank and put it into the players' hands, because it takes forever for anybody to go bankrupt that way.  The only one like that that we used to do when I was kid was the "land on Go, collect $200, then collect another $200 when you pass go" thing, but even that would extend the games so we stopped.

The one rule I liked (and that made the game end more quickly, usually) was that we used to allow players not only to put multiple houses on a property, but multiple hotels as well.  That turned even shiatty properties like Baltic and Mediterranean into potential bankruptcy-makers--you land on Baltic with 3 hotels on it, and you have to pay like $1500 to the slumlord who owns it.  And since it's cheap to buy housed and hotels on the cheap properties (only $50 for a house on Baltic and Mediterranean, it's doable to put up multiple hotels.  Of course, you're balancing the risk of going bankrupt when you land on someone else's property with a hotel if you've spent all your money putting multiple hotels up in the slums, but that's another way to make the game go quicker.
 
2014-03-25 01:08:25 PM  

PainInTheASP: Three words: capital gains taxes.


Who gets to be the IRS?
 
2014-03-25 01:12:52 PM  

Kredal: Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.

Putting money in the middle is a large part of the reason why Monopoly games last 17 years on average.  First, there not not be so much extra money injected into the game by random chance (that's why the bank error is $75, and making it around the board is only $200).  Second, all of the fines and such are meant to leave the game via the bank.  Keeping that money around by putting it in the center and letting free-parking pick it up keeps additional money in the game that shouldn't be.  With that much extra money kicking around, it becomes less and less likely that someone will actually go broke, and thus be out of the game, which means that the game will end at some point!


[stoplikingwhatidontlike.jpg]
 
2014-03-25 01:16:43 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: Kredal: Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.

Putting money in the middle is a large part of the reason why Monopoly games last 17 years on average.  First, there not not be so much extra money injected into the game by random chance (that's why the bank error is $75, and making it around the board is only $200).  Second, all of the fines and such are meant to leave the game via the bank.  Keeping that money around by putting it in the center and letting free-parking pick it up keeps additional money in the game that shouldn't be.  With that much extra money kicking around, it becomes less and less likely that someone will actually go broke, and thus be out of the game, which means that the game will end at some point!

[stoplikingwhatidontlike.jpg]


Nobody sane LIKES Monopoly games that last 17 years.
 
2014-03-25 01:23:43 PM  
All I know about Monopoly is that I leave the green and blue properties to the suckers and get rich with the orange and red properties in that corner around Free Parking.

Oh, you got a hote on Park Place, huh?  Too bad no one ever lands on that spot.
 
2014-03-25 01:24:25 PM  
Turning to a related topic, here's a little riddle that I'll toss out there to see if anybody else figures it the same way:

I played Monopoly last week for the first time in a couple of years, with my teenage daughter and my wife.  My daughter asked me if I thought there was any property that was more or less likely to be landed on than any other, or if the chances were the same for landing on each property.  I calculated that, although the differences are slight, of all the properties on the board, Park Place is the property is least likely to be landed on.

I think I'm right about that.  Anybody want to confirm or deny, or take a guess what my theory about that is?  I'll post it in a little while if anybody cares.
 
2014-03-25 01:26:26 PM  
Cyberluddite:

The one rule I liked (and that made the game end more quickly, usually) was that we used to allow players not only to put multiple houses on a property, but multiple hotels as well.  That turned even shiatty properties like Baltic and Mediterranean into potential bankruptcy-makers--you land on Baltic with 3 hotels on it, and you have to pay like $1500 to the slumlord who owns it.  And since it's cheap to buy housed and hotels on the cheap properties (only $50 for a house on Baltic and Mediterranean, it's doable to put up multiple hotels.  Of course, you're balancing the risk of going bankrupt when you land on someone else's property with a hotel if you've spent all your money putting multiple hotels up in the slums, but that's another way to make the game go quicker.

We used to play the same rule too when I was a kid.
 
2014-03-25 01:28:09 PM  

Ghastly: Blowjobs are acceptable payment if you don't have enough money to make rent.

Just like when I was in college.


I think I like this rule.  I'll have to find the --um-- right crowd to try it on.
 
2014-03-25 01:29:05 PM  

Kredal: Mitch Taylor's Bro: Kredal: Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.

Putting money in the middle is a large part of the reason why Monopoly games last 17 years on average.  First, there not not be so much extra money injected into the game by random chance (that's why the bank error is $75, and making it around the board is only $200).  Second, all of the fines and such are meant to leave the game via the bank.  Keeping that money around by putting it in the center and letting free-parking pick it up keeps additional money in the game that shouldn't be.  With that much extra money kicking around, it becomes less and less likely that someone will actually go broke, and thus be out of the game, which means that the game will end at some point!

[stoplikingwhatidontlike.jpg]

Nobody sane LIKES Monopoly games that last 17 years.


The way I always played that "house rule," it's a random redistribution of wealth with a little seed money at the start. Only the first free parking was pulled from the bank. All the rest were the result of fines and such. But the money supply is finite, so even if everyone were rich at one point, the game would come crashing down as rents increased, the weaker players had to forfeit their properties and one player started to dominate.

Honestly, the only monopoly games I've ever thought went on too long were the ones I was eliminated first, or was hanging by a thread for a long time, prolonging the agony and delaying the inevitable. When enough people get to that point, we'd just declare the richest player the winner and get on with the next thing. Two hours was probably the max.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2014-03-25 01:29:59 PM  
Real Estate Investment Trusts

And HOAs.
 
2014-03-25 01:31:09 PM  

Rev.K: I'm no expert, but I think people are doing this already.


And they're damn lucky that the Hasbro Police haven't shown up and sent them directly to jail.

To me, the biggest problem with Monopoly is that very few home rules folks auction properties (we never did as kids), so it takes too long before they're all snapped up. And then, with everyone paying list price for properties, they don't have money to build on them, which means it takes even longer to bankrupt folks.
 
2014-03-25 02:04:56 PM  
Strip monopoly!  You get bored after a few trips around the board and get naked!
 
2014-03-25 02:08:17 PM  
Marxopoly Rule: After all the properties have been allocated, the player with the most assets will be forced to retire and his/her properties will be distributed to the other players according to need.
 
2014-03-25 02:09:28 PM  
Monopoly sucks.
Settlers of Cataan rules.
 
2014-03-25 02:09:40 PM  
I don't understand what's ironic about the Top Hat, subby.
 
2014-03-25 02:09:40 PM  

Because People in power are Stupid: Free Parking rules.


Everywhere is free parking if you drive around with a bear
 
2014-03-25 02:10:08 PM  
Has anyone ever finished a game?
 
2014-03-25 02:11:08 PM  

Cyberluddite: [snip] I calculated that, although the differences are slight, of all the properties on the board, Park Place is the property is least likely to be landed on.


While not totally relevant since it's a different version of the game, I must be extremely lucky as in the course of playing Monopoly City I obtained Park Place, loaded it up, and then bankrupted the other two remaining players when they each landed on it.

/love me some free money on free parking when playing
 
2014-03-25 02:16:02 PM  
Nobody wants to be the iron.
 
2014-03-25 02:17:03 PM  

Barfmaker: We always put $500 in the middle of the board and then the fines and such would go there too, whoever lands on free parking wins all that and then another $500 goes in the middle, etc.

I'm not sure if that's part of the rules though.


Well, the rules are designed to get the money removed from play, as the whole object is to get all your opponents to run out of money. Keeping the money in the middle only serves to lengthen the game.

Though that wasn't what killed our family's games of Monopoly. Our problem is that absolutely nobody at the table would ever agree to any trade that gave one trader a monopoly but not the other, which basically meant nobody traded with anybody and the whole game consisted of $18 and $32 chip damage while the houses and hotels never got touched.
 
2014-03-25 02:19:04 PM  

Cyberluddite: Turning to a related topic, here's a little riddle that I'll toss out there to see if anybody else figures it the same way:

I played Monopoly last week for the first time in a couple of years, with my teenage daughter and my wife.  My daughter asked me if I thought there was any property that was more or less likely to be landed on than any other, or if the chances were the same for landing on each property.  I calculated that, although the differences are slight, of all the properties on the board, Park Place is the property is least likely to be landed on.

I think I'm right about that.  Anybody want to confirm or deny, or take a guess what my theory about that is?  I'll post it in a little while if anybody cares.


Mediterranean is worse. Being only one space from GO, you'll never land on it starting from GO, so you have to complete a full circuit of the board to be able to land on it. In that sense, it's just like Park Place, but further, so slightly lower chance of landing there.
 
2014-03-25 02:19:48 PM  
The game design is seriously flawed as there should never be a scenario in which a board game takes more than 4 or 5 hours to decide a victor. Fix that, and maybe I will buy it.
 
2014-03-25 02:21:56 PM  
Guys wear shirt, pants and underwear while chicks have about twenty layers.  When cashing in clothes to make a payment I think the rules should reflect that women have more clothes that should be worth less.
 
2014-03-25 02:22:28 PM  

Kuta: Monopoly sucks.
Settlers of Cataan rules.


Never played Settlers of Cataan...

Now, Settlers of Catan, on the other hand... not a bad game.

/Currently trying my luck with Eldritch Horror
//Got to try Rampage out a couple weeks ago. That was fun.
///Monopoly on slashies! Pay me $200 for each one you use...
 
2014-03-25 02:23:28 PM  

Rev.K: FTA:

"While the official Monopoly rules will not change," the company said in a statement, "fans who love playing with 'house rules' will now have the opportunity to play them in their game."

I'm no expert, but I think people are doing this already.


Unofficially.

But now they'll officially be able to play using their unofficial rules.

Thanks, Hasbro, for letting us play your game our way!
 
2014-03-25 02:23:30 PM  
I have won many games by acting as a slumlord with the crappy, cheap properties on the first stretch after GO. You load those up with motels and houses early, and they will take their toll. It may not be death all at once when you land on them, like Park Place or Boardwalk, but it will probably sap a fair amount of your opponents' money each time they go around the board.

I will pay way more than original value for those properties ($300 instead of $100!) while the suckers keep working on St. James Place and Park Place. I'll pay up to $500 for those properties, because in the end, they are still capable of breaking other players if managed properly.

And rule #2 for me: NEVER trade for anything. Never. Ever. If I don't get those properties, I will not trade anything for them. I'd rather everyone have a few of each property and NOBODY gets a monopoly than to get those, and risk the other guy getting a monopoly which makes MY trip around the board less safe.
 
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