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(Daily Mail)   A new high-tech gumshield with a silicone balloon inside that rests against the teeth and is connected to a small machine that pumps air in and out of the balloon could replace braces... If it didn't make the wearer look even more ridiculous   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 38
    More: Weird, teeth  
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6838 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Mar 2014 at 5:05 AM (30 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-25 12:26:18 AM  
12 to 18 months with conventional braces.

Lies!
 
2014-03-25 01:09:01 AM  
Call me a luddite, but I remain a supporter of low-tech mouth pumping
 
2014-03-25 05:12:53 AM  
umm...Invisalign??
 
2014-03-25 05:14:01 AM  
I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....
 
2014-03-25 05:23:22 AM  
Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.
 
2014-03-25 05:24:31 AM  

robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....


I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.
 
2014-03-25 05:28:59 AM  
Article includes stock photos a of girl blowing up a balloon, and a girl blowing a gum bubble.

/oh the humanity
 
2014-03-25 05:31:30 AM  
Jesus, that was a car crash of a headline!!
 
2014-03-25 05:33:11 AM  

gadian: Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.


Rhino_man: robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....

I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.


It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?
 
2014-03-25 05:40:44 AM  

robohobo: That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?


How do the kids today say it?  I know that feel, bro.
 
2014-03-25 05:41:21 AM  
Had to have braces twice, thanks to divorcing parents, for a total of like 5 and a half years of having braces. And still didn't end up with awesome results. Thanks for killing my teenage years for farking nothing, mom and dad.

And I swear to fark, when they took out my wisdom teeth, they sutured a small piece of my cheek to my lower left gums, but no parent believed me. Still feels weird back there 20 years later.

farking hate all things dentist.
 
2014-03-25 05:48:32 AM  

Somebody Else: Article includes stock photos a of girl blowing up a balloon, and a girl blowing a gum bubble.

/oh the humanity


Came here to comment on that. I picture the main floor of the Daily Mail filled with escaped zoo animals, a clown cricket team, and a bunch of drunk interns. Everyone is running around with cameras and throwing confetti and yelling things like, "I'm so chuffed!"
 
2014-03-25 05:52:04 AM  

robohobo: It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?


It must be hard - sincerely - to live in a country where regular, tombstone, false-looking teeth are the social norm. The rest of the world really doesn't care.
 
2014-03-25 05:53:51 AM  

robohobo: gadian: Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.

Rhino_man: robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....

I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.

It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?


I know exactly what you mean. My crowding is severe and extremely noticible... I do my best to not let it hold me back, but there's always that voice in the back of my head.

"Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."
"Cover your mouth when you laugh. You look stupid."
"Oh shiat, is that a camera? Get out of the frame and DON'T SMILE. You look stupid."

Thank the gods for online dating... After a few days of texting a woman, after she sees the kind of person I am, it's usually no big deal when I tell her.

"Before we actually meet, there's something you should know. My teeth are really crooked. They're all there, and they're all healthy... it just looks bad."

Most women say it's no big deal, and then go on to prove that it isn't. The few who have a problem with it aren't worth more than the 2-3 days it takes me to tell them anyway.
 
2014-03-25 05:56:39 AM  

orbister: robohobo: It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

It must be hard - sincerely - to live in a country where regular, tombstone, false-looking teeth are the social norm. The rest of the world really doesn't care.


Never said I wanted tombstone false looking teeth. If that were the case, I would have mentioned veneers along with braces.

And of course, you're from Great Britain. Things are different there.
 
2014-03-25 05:58:20 AM  
Word to the wise.  Overly aggressive ortho treatment can result in a condition called "blunted roots."  Before being sold on the idea of rapid movement of teeth, research very carefully the costs associated with saving blunted root teeth.  I'm talking about much more than money.
 
2014-03-25 06:00:12 AM  

Rhino_man: "Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."


It never occurred to me that it would be hard to learn to smile and show your teeth like normal people, but it is.
 
2014-03-25 06:03:27 AM  

Rhino_man: robohobo: gadian: Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.

Rhino_man: robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....

I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.

It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

I know exactly what you mean. My crowding is severe and extremely noticible... I do my best to not let it hold me back, but there's always that voice in the back of my head.

"Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."
"Cover your mouth when you laugh. You look stupid."
"Oh shiat, is that a camera? Get out of the frame and DON'T SMILE. You look stupid."

Thank the gods for online dating... After a few days of texting a woman, after she sees the kind of person I am, it's usually no big deal when I tell her.

"Before we actually meet, there's something you should know. My teeth are really crooked. They're all there, and they're all healthy... it just looks bad."

Most women say it's no big deal, and then go on to prove that it isn't. The few who have a problem with it aren't worth more than the 2-3 d ...


Ha, yeah, I've perfected my smirk over the years. It comes a bit more naturally than the smile. I can't imagine adding dating on top of things, though. My wife I have been together since we were teenagers, but still in the back of my mind, of all the things she deserves better than...my stupid farking teeth. Especially when she's leagues beyond me, and every professional dinner we have to go to is filled with perfect looking doctors and surgeons(of which she is one). And really, I'm not even sure I'm in any shape to get braces without having teeth pulled. As I said, I abused the fark out of myself in my 20s. My teeth aren't the healthiest. That compounded with the fact that professionals talk amongst themselves(despite what they say to the contrary), word of so and so's husbands bad teeth gets around.
 
2014-03-25 06:04:35 AM  

gadian: Rhino_man: "Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."

It never occurred to me that it would be hard to learn to smile and show your teeth like normal people, but it is.


Fark me in the beard, did it just get dusty in here?

People who didn't need braces, got braces at a young (read: normal) age, and those who live in the UK really don't understand what it's like. They don't know how isolating it can be to be afraid of your own farking smile, and be the only one in the room to feel that way.
 
2014-03-25 06:13:17 AM  

robohobo: Rhino_man: robohobo: gadian: Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.

Rhino_man: robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....

I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.

It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

I know exactly what you mean. My crowding is severe and extremely noticible... I do my best to not let it hold me back, but there's always that voice in the back of my head.

"Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."
"Cover your mouth when you laugh. You look stupid."
"Oh shiat, is that a camera? Get out of the frame and DON'T SMILE. You look stupid."

Thank the gods for online dating... After a few days of texting a woman, after she sees the kind of person I am, it's usually no big deal when I tell her.

"Before we actually meet, there's something you should know. My teeth are really crooked. They're all there, and they're all healthy... it just looks bad."

Most women say it's no big deal, and then go on to prove that it isn't. The few who have a problem with it aren't worth more than the 2-3 d ...

Ha, yeah, I've perfected my smirk over the years. It comes a bit more naturally than the smile. I can't imagine adding dating on top of things, though. My wife I have been together since we were teenagers, but still in the back of my mind, of all the things she deserves better than...my stupid farking teeth. Especially when she's leagues beyond me, and every professional dinner we have to go to is filled with perfect looking doctors and surgeons(of which she is one). And really, I'm not even sure I'm in any shape to get braces without having teeth pulled. As I said, I abused the fark out of myself in my 20s. My teeth aren't the healthiest. That compounded with the fact that professionals talk amongst themselves(despite what they say to the contrary), word of so and so's husbands bad teeth gets around.


Believe me, I know what you mean. I actually find it much easier to tell women about the divorces (Yes, plural - they both cheated) than the teeth...

... but when I'm in a relationship with someone, it's the farking teeth. Always the farking teeth that I'm worried about. I'm a fairly good looking guy, and I'm pretty much drama free... but whenever I'm with someone, I just keep thinking "She shouldn't have to put up with my farking teeth. She shouldn't have to kiss this mouth."
 
2014-03-25 06:13:46 AM  

robohobo: It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?


As someone who avoided going to the dentist for 5 years until just last week only to have the dentist do his best to make me feel like utter crap for it, I can sympathize. The profession seems to attract smug, sanctimonious assholes.

/I've worn the enamel off of half my teeth by grinding them in my sleep
//Dentist found this utterly hilarious and treated me like a naughty child refusing to eat his greens.
 
2014-03-25 06:27:55 AM  

Gunther: robohobo: It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

As someone who avoided going to the dentist for 5 years until just last week only to have the dentist do his best to make me feel like utter crap for it, I can sympathize. The profession seems to attract smug, sanctimonious assholes.

/I've worn the enamel off of half my teeth by grinding them in my sleep
//Dentist found this utterly hilarious and treated me like a naughty child refusing to eat his greens.


It's just a doctor thing, really. Every specialist thinks their specialty is the most important to the cause. My wife's a neuro-
ophthalmologist, so I've the 'pleasure' of knowing many a doctor who think they're a god. Zuul.. Couple that with dentists not being able to quite cut it in anything more. There's a lot of bitterness there. Beyond that, I'd pay a crapton to find a good one who specialized in asshole who didn't take care of themselves. Without the smug.
 
2014-03-25 06:31:42 AM  

robohobo: Gunther: robohobo: It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

As someone who avoided going to the dentist for 5 years until just last week only to have the dentist do his best to make me feel like utter crap for it, I can sympathize. The profession seems to attract smug, sanctimonious assholes.

/I've worn the enamel off of half my teeth by grinding them in my sleep
//Dentist found this utterly hilarious and treated me like a naughty child refusing to eat his greens.

It's just a doctor thing, really. Every specialist thinks their specialty is the most important to the cause. My wife's a neuro-
ophthalmologist, so I've the 'pleasure' of knowing many a doctor who think they're a god. Zuul.. Couple that with dentists not being able to quite cut it in anything more. There's a lot of bitterness there. Beyond that, I'd pay a crapton to find a good one who specialized in asshole who didn't take care of themselves. Without the smug.


Hah. I used to work in healthcare, too... surrounded constantly by Radiation Oncologists. Smug asshole is a common doctor trait.
 
2014-03-25 06:31:43 AM  

gadian: Rhino_man: "Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."

It never occurred to me that it would be hard to learn to smile and show your teeth like normal people, but it is.


My teeth were awful for a long time (health problems weakened my teeth severely). Finally got the cash to fix them and it was hard to remember that I *could* smile now without looking like a methed out redneck. You wouldn't think smiling is hard until you don't do it for years because of embarassment.
 
2014-03-25 07:12:21 AM  
I can't believe it's going to take A GIRL to bring this up...you mean not one of you guys thought about the "possibilities" of someone having small vibrating devices on the top and bottom of their mouth??!!!?

/sorry about all the dental problems
//if you're a good person, not-perfect teeth are not as big a thing as you think
 
2014-03-25 07:18:20 AM  
Here we see the mating call of the average teenager.

You can see from the wide eyes of terror and the balloning appendage, that this particular individual has not had any previous sexual experience.
In certain populations this quote overt flaunting of inexperience can be a sought after commodity, we're some combustible individuals harbour desires of acquiring up to 72 mates with no previous experience.
This in turn leads to experienced individuals mimicking traits of virginity.

However, in the western hemisphere it's a different story all together.

img.fark.net

/End Attenborough-mode
 
2014-03-25 07:24:54 AM  

Public Savant: Here we see the mating call of the average teenager.

You can see from the wide eyes of terror and the balloning appendage, that this particular individual has not had any previous sexual experience.
In certain populations this quote overt flaunting of inexperience can be a sought after commodity, we're some combustible individuals harbour desires of acquiring up to 72 mates with no previous experience.
This in turn leads to experienced individuals mimicking traits of virginity.

However, in the western hemisphere it's a different story all together.



/End Attenborough-mode


Ok, that was cute as hell.

I think it's hilarious that your post is right after mine - I remember something you said in another thread recently ;-)
 
2014-03-25 07:26:22 AM  

August11: Somebody Else: Article includes stock photos a of girl blowing up a balloon, and a girl blowing a gum bubble.

/oh the humanity

Came here to comment on that. I picture the main floor of the Daily Mail filled with escaped zoo animals, a clown cricket team, and a bunch of drunk interns. Everyone is running around with cameras and throwing confetti and yelling things like, "I'm so chuffed!"


That -along with the notion that they create new stories simply by writing up thing lunatics have posted in the comment sections of stories they've posted- why the Daily Fail sucks I've yet heard.
 
2014-03-25 07:47:13 AM  
Getting braces as an adult was the best thing I have ever done for myself.

Find a dentist that specializes in nervous patients to get your teeth in good shape first then get to an orthodontist. There are a ton of options out there now.

If you are already hiding your teeth and explaining them to people, having braces won't make you any more self conscious than you already are.
 
2014-03-25 09:02:59 AM  
I come from a family of crooked teeth.  My parents had them, relatives, cousins, etc.  Then my daughter was born with absolutely perfect teeth.  I didn't think it was possible.

Also, braces suck.
/braces for three years
//wore retainer
///teeth went back to original position except now I have a front tooth gap
////waste of money
 
2014-03-25 09:16:49 AM  

Notabunny: Call me a luddite, but I remain a supporter of low-tech mouth pumping


God? Is that you? It's me, Beej.
 
2014-03-25 09:43:05 AM  
Well the important questions...

How will this affect oral sex?

What about the brace fetish industry?

IS ANYONE THINKING??
 
2014-03-25 10:15:06 AM  

Rhino_man: robohobo: Rhino_man: robohobo: gadian: Gah, this story makes me want to go put in my retainer.  Don't worry robohobo, I didn't get my braces until I was 30 and it was one of the best things I've ever done just for myself because I always hated my teeth.  Still do, but I don't feel like I'm being looked down when I speak or smile.

Rhino_man: robohobo: I've been thinking about getting braces...but I'm 34, and adults with braces....

I'm 26 and in exactly the same position. I was told that my orthodontic crowding is too severe for invisalign... so I'm really hoping this gets US approval and works as advertized.

Especially seeing as how it's worn exclusively at night. I wouldn't care if it took three YEARS, I *WANT* this.

It's nice to hear others are/have been in the same boat. My teeth aren't horrible, but they need some correcting, and I've always been a bit self conscious of them. Spending the most of my 20's as a heavy-smoking very, very alcoholic certainly didn't help. Cost isn't an issue, but I haven't been to the dentist in a really, really long time. Funny how a seemingly small thing can be so...destructive to one's sense of self. That's not exactly right, but you know what I mean?

I know exactly what you mean. My crowding is severe and extremely noticible... I do my best to not let it hold me back, but there's always that voice in the back of my head.

"Smirk, don't smile. You look stupid."
"Cover your mouth when you laugh. You look stupid."
"Oh shiat, is that a camera? Get out of the frame and DON'T SMILE. You look stupid."

Thank the gods for online dating... After a few days of texting a woman, after she sees the kind of person I am, it's usually no big deal when I tell her.

"Before we actually meet, there's something you should know. My teeth are really crooked. They're all there, and they're all healthy... it just looks bad."

Most women say it's no big deal, and then go on to prove that it isn't. The few who have a problem with it aren't worth more t ...


Goddamn it's good to find kindred spirits in this, though I technically have the exact opposite problem. My mouth has always been way too big for my teeth, and even after all four of my wisdom teeth came in, when I smile it's like two rows of Chiclets sat atop a fireplace mantle. Learned very early on how to pull off the closed-lip-smirk maneouver.
 
2014-03-25 10:35:40 AM  
Really, Daily Fail?  Those are your pictures for this story?

/You suck
 
2014-03-25 11:03:40 AM  

neongoats: Had to have braces twice, thanks to divorcing parents, for a total of like 5 and a half years of having braces. And still didn't end up with awesome results. Thanks for killing my teenage years for farking nothing, mom and dad.

And I swear to fark, when they took out my wisdom teeth, they sutured a small piece of my cheek to my lower left gums, but no parent believed me. Still feels weird back there 20 years later.

farking hate all things dentist.


I opted for the non-brace route, although years of impacted wisdom teeth shoved my upper set forward enough to displace a tooth forward and down a bit, and did the same (although to a lesser degree) on my lower set. The reason for the opt-out? Except for the 2 that are out of place I have a good bite and no crowding issues or crooked teeth. The best part? The two that are out of place are the upper and lower canines on the right side, resulting in me having a half Vampiric look. I don't smile very often or very big when I do to keep the fangs hidden. They always incite tons of (mostly) female curiosity thanks to those damn twilight books so I avoid showing them if I can.
 
2014-03-25 12:13:20 PM  
I'm thinking of having a gumshield installed in front of my laptop screen.
 
2014-03-25 01:13:00 PM  
patentimages.storage.googleapis.com

Assignee: Matsushiata Electric Works
Priority date: 28 March 2006.

Does the exact same thing except they use magnets attached to your teeth with E+M fields to generate the vibrations instead of a tube and air pressure.

patentimages.storage.googleapis.com

US PGPUB 20090061379
 
2014-03-25 10:29:55 PM  

MaliFinn: I come from a family of crooked teeth.  My parents had them, relatives, cousins, etc.  Then my daughter was born with absolutely perfect teeth.  I didn't think it was possible.


Does she kinda look like one of your wife's co-workers or ex-boyfriends by any chance?
 
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