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(CNN)   CNN offers advice to families dealing with grief of flight 370. Noticeably absent: avoiding CNN and their daily dose of ever-changing bullshiat questions about what might have happened   (edition.cnn.com) divider line 35
    More: Obvious, CNN, Kuala Lumpur to Beijing, school-related attacks, Columbine High School, flights, families  
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550 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2014 at 9:13 AM (18 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



35 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-21 08:52:10 AM
Colonel Mustard in the drawing room with an SA-7 Strela.
 
2014-03-21 09:16:49 AM
You're going to feel stupid when it turns out the plane really was swallowed up by a black hole.
 
2014-03-21 09:19:00 AM

Dwindle: You're going to feel stupid when it turns out the plane really was swallowed up by a black hole.


img.4plebs.org

Maximillian is wanted for questioning.
 
2014-03-21 09:20:00 AM
The plane accidentally flew over a small uninhabited island that still technically belongs to the Spanish empire. A monsoon abruptly opened up overhead and dumped 12 thousand gallons of water onto the craft knocking it out of the sky.
 
2014-03-21 09:23:40 AM
Tuned is briefly to CNN for the first time in a long time and saw the banner headline...

WAS IT A ZOMBIE PLANE?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we're done.
 
2014-03-21 09:24:38 AM
I bet it was space aliens who stole the plane and forced the passengers into weight loss clinics. They've done it before.
 
2014-03-21 09:29:06 AM
i1079.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-21 09:32:44 AM
CNN: Follow us on Twitter and poke us on Facebook about your thoughts concerning celebrity X's opinion on the missing plane!
 
2014-03-21 09:34:40 AM
I'd much rather watch CNN asking questions than watch Fox News making up absolute bullshiat claims every thirty seconds. I just quit actively watching it all after some idiot on Fox (I know, I know--which idiot, there are too many of them) declared that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was terrorists and there was no way, none at all, that mechanical failure could possibly be involved...except for the ten or twenty per cent chance that it was mechanical failure of some kind. But--terrists!

And Bill O'Reilly, who frankly looks sane among the Fox News crowd, lost all credibility with me last week. Tuesday: "Well, obviously it's terrorism." Friday (on David Letterman's show): "Well now we know that the pilots committed suicide." No evidence for either theory, but he just knows. Because he's clairvoyant or something.

(He isn't.)
 
2014-03-21 09:35:05 AM

Ned Stark: The plane accidentally flew over a small uninhabited island that still technically belongs to the Spanish empire. A monsoon abruptly opened up overhead and dumped 12 thousand gallons of water onto the craft knocking it out of the sky.


Spanish Empire.  It would have dropped 12 thousand galleons.
 
2014-03-21 09:40:54 AM
BREAKING NEWS: No debris found.


-Actual headline this morning
 
2014-03-21 09:42:50 AM

Ned Stark: The plane accidentally flew over a small uninhabited island that still technically belongs to the Spanish empire. A monsoon abruptly opened up overhead and dumped 12 thousand gallons of water onto the craft knocking it out of the sky.


Care to explain how the rain in Spain fell mainly on the plane?
 
2014-03-21 09:49:19 AM
Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.
 
2014-03-21 09:55:10 AM

nekom: Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.


Oh, it will be found, eventually. Might take years, perhaps even a couple decades, but we'll find it.
 
2014-03-21 10:14:01 AM

maram500: And Bill O'Reilly, who frankly looks sane among the Fox News crowd, lost all credibility with me last week. Tuesday: "Well, obviously it's terrorism." Friday (on David Letterman's show): "Well now we know that the pilots committed suicide." No evidence for either theory, but he just knows. Because he's clairvoyant or something.

(He isn't.)


Be careful, maram500, Bill O'Reilly has a direct line to God.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/26/bill-oreilly-jesus-60-minut es _n_3996925.html
 
2014-03-21 10:17:35 AM
Did anyone see the article on The Onion? It talked about how the families of the people on the flight really hope the media can get closure..

I'm surprised.. This is the first article about the plane I've seen in the last 24 hours.. Normally there's a non-update to the story at least 4 times a day!
 
2014-03-21 10:18:29 AM

dittybopper: nekom: Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.

Oh, it will be found, eventually. Might take years, perhaps even a couple decades, but we'll find it.


Took 76 years to find the Titanic and they knew its approximate location... so what's the over/under on the plane? :)
 
2014-03-21 10:20:09 AM
How about just avoiding CNN? Just everyone.
 
2014-03-21 10:23:37 AM

reprobate1125: How about just avoiding CNN? Just everyone.


This. Whenever there's a disaster, you can always count on CNN to get the details 100% wrong.
 
2014-03-21 10:23:43 AM
A black hole?!? Double facepalm.
 
2014-03-21 10:23:52 AM

QueenMamaBee: dittybopper: nekom: Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.

Oh, it will be found, eventually. Might take years, perhaps even a couple decades, but we'll find it.

Took 76 years to find the Titanic and they knew its approximate location... so what's the over/under on the plane? :)


If you're taking action on the over/under of 76 years, put me down for $10,000.00 on the under.
 
2014-03-21 10:49:12 AM

dittybopper: Ned Stark: The plane accidentally flew over a small uninhabited island that still technically belongs to the Spanish empire. A monsoon abruptly opened up overhead and dumped 12 thousand gallons of water onto the craft knocking it out of the sky.

Spanish Empire.  It would have dropped 12 thousand galleons.


No one expects the Spanish galleons.
 
2014-03-21 10:53:42 AM
I know this may come as a shock to people but Google/CNN/MSN/Fox News are not in the news business, they're in the advertising business. They sell ads. Anytime the story changes or is breaking, if they can get eyeballs to come and watch the sensationalism, they can try to sell the ads between the crap.  The business model isn't really much different than TMZ. TMZ just doesn't take itself as seriously.
 
2014-03-21 10:55:09 AM
 
2014-03-21 11:12:26 AM

fustanella: A black hole?!? Double facepalm.


Exactly Because if it was, then everything would be gone, including our planet! All sucked into the black hole and civilization would be gone.

/thanks a lot, Maximillian
 
2014-03-21 11:20:36 AM
Just imaging for a moment I missing plane completely populated with pretty white girls. Cable news would tear a hole into another dimension of complete freak out.
 
2014-03-21 11:22:59 AM

tommyl66: Ned Stark: The plane accidentally flew over a small uninhabited island that still technically belongs to the Spanish empire. A monsoon abruptly opened up overhead and dumped 12 thousand gallons of water onto the craft knocking it out of the sky.

Care to explain how the rain in Spain fell mainly on the plane?


It was the slopes.
 
2014-03-21 11:31:25 AM

AFKobel: QueenMamaBee: dittybopper: nekom: Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.

Oh, it will be found, eventually. Might take years, perhaps even a couple decades, but we'll find it.

Took 76 years to find the Titanic and they knew its approximate location... so what's the over/under on the plane? :)

If you're taking action on the over/under of 76 years, put me down for $10,000.00 on the under.


Okay. Just um... let me take possession of that $10K first... I'll uh... hold it for safekeeping.
 
2014-03-21 11:32:17 AM

QueenMamaBee: dittybopper: nekom: Two weeks later and the only thing we know for sure is that it didn't land in Beijing.  It's becoming a real possibility that this plane will never be found.

Oh, it will be found, eventually. Might take years, perhaps even a couple decades, but we'll find it.

Took 76 years to find the Titanic and they knew its approximate location... so what's the over/under on the plane? :)


You  have to remember, though, that for much of that time, we didn't have the technology to find it.  Once we had the technology, starting somewhere in the late 1960's (see:   Project Azorian), it was less than 20 years before we found the Titanic in 1985..

Today, we've got even more sophisticated tools.  The flipside of that is that a broken up airliner is a much smaller target than the Titanic.
 
2014-03-21 11:33:09 AM

Amish Tech Support: Just imaging for a moment I missing plane completely populated with pretty white girls. Cable news would tear a hole into another dimension of complete freak out.


With voyeuristic intentions?
 
2014-03-21 12:45:26 PM

Mad_Radhu: Families Of Missing Flight Passengers Just Hoping Media Gets Closure It Needs

img.fark.net

Malaysia Airlines Expands Investigation To Include General Scope Of Space, Time


Gene Ray has the answer. It's so obvious now.

www.timecube.com
 
2014-03-21 01:08:49 PM
Sadly, though, a relative said she gets most of her information from the media because the Malaysian Government and airline give them zilch.
 
2014-03-21 01:09:27 PM

WalMartian: Sadly, though, a relative said she gets most of her information from the media because the Malaysian Government and airline give them zilch.


To clarify, not my relative, a relative of a missing passenger.
 
2014-03-21 07:11:30 PM

Gunboat: maram500: And Bill O'Reilly, who frankly looks sane among the Fox News crowd, lost all credibility with me last week. Tuesday: "Well, obviously it's terrorism." Friday (on David Letterman's show): "Well now we know that the pilots committed suicide." No evidence for either theory, but he just knows. Because he's clairvoyant or something.

(He isn't.)

Be careful, maram500, Bill O'Reilly has a direct line to God.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/26/bill-oreilly-jesus-60-minut es _n_3996925.html


To me, that only proves he's more nuts than I previously believed.
 
2014-03-21 07:22:32 PM

maram500: To me, that only proves he's more nuts than I previously believed


Excellent.  My work here is done.
 
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