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(Daily Mail)   Six-year-old girl uses prescription "monster spray" to eradicate monsters under her bed. Stupid kid... doesn't she know that prescription strength monster eradication remedies are only available in powdered form?   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 86
    More: Amusing, prescription bottle, boogeyman, monsters  
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6173 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Mar 2014 at 8:58 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-21 03:53:56 AM  
That has got to be the best doctor ever.
 
2014-03-21 07:23:27 AM  
At least it wasn't suppositories.
 
2014-03-21 08:30:38 AM  

beverly8: That has got to be the best doctor ever.


Pharmacists, and yes they are awesome.
 
2014-03-21 08:35:13 AM  
I guess if a pharmacy sells homeopathic bullshiat , they might as well sell this too.
 
2014-03-21 08:35:53 AM  
Oh good, validate your kid's belief in the supernatural and encourage dependence on Big Pharma in a single move.

/I keed, cute story. Cute kid.

//How YOU doin', mom?
 
2014-03-21 08:48:45 AM  
Probably isn't covered under Obamacare.
 
2014-03-21 09:01:07 AM  
If you overuse it the monsters develop resistance and grow even stronger.  You should let her know that.  Good lesson in adaptation and uncertainty both.
 
2014-03-21 09:02:14 AM  
Jeepers. When I was a kid, we worried about Polio.

/debbie downer.jpg
 
2014-03-21 09:02:28 AM  
Incoming csb:

When I was little; dad said that we had monster-proof paint.
 
2014-03-21 09:02:34 AM  
They just mutate to be immune to the monster spray. . . and get more fear hungry.
 
2014-03-21 09:03:43 AM  
OMG what have her parents done???!!? That Monster Spray is horrible. Sure you kill some of the monsters under the bed, but the rest will evolve immunities and then you can never kill them! You have Super Bad-Ass Monsters Under The Bed now!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!11!
 
2014-03-21 09:04:33 AM  
Only $75 a can.
 
2014-03-21 09:05:53 AM  
Side effects: May cause monsterism
 
2014-03-21 09:06:10 AM  

Relatively Obscure: Oh good, validate your kid's belief in the supernatural and encourage dependence on Big Pharma in a single move.

/I keed, cute story. Cute kid.

//How YOU doin', mom?


Just wait until Big Pharma hears about it.  They'll have the lawyers and regulators all over this guy.
 
2014-03-21 09:06:19 AM  
There's no problem with this. Kids develop irrational(to us) fears, and sometimes the healthiest way to conquer them is to pretend they really exist and then help them find a way that THEY think gets rid of them. This is a great idea.
 
2014-03-21 09:06:49 AM  

my lip balm addiction: OMG what have her parents done???!!? That Monster Spray is horrible. Sure you kill some of the monsters under the bed, but the rest will evolve immunities and then you can never kill them! You have Super Bad-Ass Monsters Under The Bed now!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!11!


Hopefully, haven't just encouraged badass skags to hang out under their kid's bed.
 
2014-03-21 09:06:56 AM  
Blue food coloring and water?  How is this good for carpets?  I bet they have a light blue hue to it now.  What's wrong with a can of air freshner or put febreeze in a new spray bottle, or some other scent product compared to dropping dye onto a carpet.
 
2014-03-21 09:08:43 AM  
I use a spray bottle of water to kill monsters and bugs in my four year old's room.  Where's my Daily Fail story?
 
2014-03-21 09:09:17 AM  
This cute and cool, but one question came to mind. TFA says its made from water and food coloring?

Well, doesn't that mean your not just getting random stuff in the room wet, but would the coloring stain or make stuff sticky?
 
2014-03-21 09:10:36 AM  
Great, now she'll have to deal with the spray resistant mutations.
 
2014-03-21 09:11:00 AM  

Mikey1969: There's no problem with this. Kids develop irrational(to us) fears, and sometimes the healthiest way to conquer them is to pretend they really exist and then help them find a way that THEY think gets rid of them. This is a great idea.


Monsters that THEY don't want you to know about?

www.visionmagazine.com

Why didn't I think of that?
 
2014-03-21 09:11:18 AM  
WARNING:  Monster Spray can cause unanticipated side effects.  Monster Spray should not be handled by children, pregnant women, not pregnant women, or men.  Do not use around pets or household furnishings.  In some cases spray has been known to cause spontaneous growth of additional appendages and gential whithering.  Monster Spray may cause rectal bleeding, stomach ulcers, nightmares, poor credit ratings, and an annoying nasal whistle that won't stop no matter how hard you dig in there.  Monster Spray is not recommended for the elimination of monsters, real or imagined.
 
2014-03-21 09:11:41 AM  
After watching Gremlins as a very young kid, I developed a fear of dark rooms that Gremlins would hide in. My parents gave me a can of Lysol with a printed label that said Gremlin spray. House was Gremlin free and Lysol fresh.

If they had just patented it I could have sued that mom's clothes off her.
 
2014-03-21 09:13:17 AM  
Monster Spray?

None of those penis enhancements actually work
 
2014-03-21 09:13:25 AM  
When I was a kid, my dad was the monster.
 
2014-03-21 09:14:33 AM  

Diogenes: WARNING:  Monster Spray can cause unanticipated side effects.  Monster Spray should not be handled by children, pregnant women, not pregnant women, or men.  Do not use around pets or household furnishings.  In some cases spray has been known to cause spontaneous growth of additional appendages and gential whithering.  Monster Spray may cause rectal bleeding, stomach ulcers, nightmares, poor credit ratings, and an annoying nasal whistle that won't stop no matter how hard you dig in there.  Monster Spray is not recommended for the elimination of monsters, real or imagined.


Do not taunt Monster Spray
 
2014-03-21 09:15:29 AM  
I have monster spray for my junk. Its equally as effective as this stuff.
 
2014-03-21 09:16:26 AM  
My parents were cheap. All I got was a snorkle
 
2014-03-21 09:16:55 AM  
The mother should read the insert.  This stuff is loaded with mercury.
 
2014-03-21 09:16:59 AM  
Not to be confused with "Monster Mist" which is what I used with kids back when I was a therapist for younger kids.  Just like adults who are delusional, you can't make someone realize that there is no basis for their irrational or delusional beliefs.  So, when I had a kid who was afraid of monsters, I would give the parents the secret formula for Monster Mist that they could use at home.  Safe for pets too.
 
2014-03-21 09:17:01 AM  
22 and two kids already. Christ, at 22 I was so immature I couldn't imagine having had to raise someone. I'm mid forties and still think I'm an idiot most days. Make that all days. By the time these kids are my age they'll be grandparents!

Good looking couple though.
 
2014-03-21 09:17:06 AM  
Warning: Patients who stop using Monster Spray have increased risk of horrible death. Bed-wetting increases these risks. In some cases, Monster Spray may attract monsters. Ask your doctor before you stop using Monster Spray.
 
2014-03-21 09:17:41 AM  
I find it more interesting that 16 year old parents were able to stay together this long.
 
2014-03-21 09:17:45 AM  
It's an old parenting trick.  My son was afraid to sleep alone in his room and complained about monsters.  I went to an online parenting forum, and they all said to do the same thing, just take an old bottle, fill it full of water, add a non-toxic fragrance (they sell these), and have him spray the room when he got scared.

Being a lazy single father of a four year old child not yet old enough to read, I bought a can of febreze, and told him it was monster spray.  For a about a month, my house smelt like febreeze.
 
2014-03-21 09:17:52 AM  
I made monster spray for my two oldest daughters when they were little. It was glade with a home made label. The smell convinced them I was actually doing something. My a-hole ex-sil told them at 3 and 4 that there were monsters in their room to get back at her brother for something he did when they were kids.
 
2014-03-21 09:18:32 AM  

Ker_Thwap: Great, now she'll have to deal with the spray resistant mutations.


Ewww, lawyers, priests and politicians under the bed.  That tap tap tap you hear isn't claws, it's Larry Craig
 
2014-03-21 09:18:50 AM  

Diogenes: WARNING:  Monster Spray can cause unanticipated side effects.  Monster Spray should not be handled by children, pregnant women, not pregnant women, or men.  Do not use around pets or household furnishings.  In some cases spray has been known to cause spontaneous growth of additional appendages and gential whithering.  Monster Spray may cause rectal bleeding, stomach ulcers, nightmares, poor credit ratings, and an annoying nasal whistle that won't stop no matter how hard you dig in there.  Monster Spray is not recommended for the elimination of monsters, real or imagined.


And that's what happens when I forget to refresh the page before posting. Failure to refresh page before posting may lead to embarrassment and redundancy. Ask your doctor before failing to refresh.
 
2014-03-21 09:18:58 AM  
Unfortunately, it's completely ineffective on the closet monsters.
 
2014-03-21 09:19:26 AM  
Sounds like someone's never heard of aerosol.
 
2014-03-21 09:19:29 AM  

my lip balm addiction: OMG what have her parents done???!!? That Monster Spray is horrible. Sure you kill some of the monsters under the bed, but the rest will evolve immunities and then you can never kill them! You have Super Bad-Ass Monsters Under The Bed now!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!11!


Yep, can't stop Darwin
 
2014-03-21 09:21:49 AM  
I'd like to learn some more about mom.
 
2014-03-21 09:23:31 AM  

Hoopy Frood: Diogenes: WARNING:  Monster Spray can cause unanticipated side effects.  Monster Spray should not be handled by children, pregnant women, not pregnant women, or men.  Do not use around pets or household furnishings.  In some cases spray has been known to cause spontaneous growth of additional appendages and gential whithering.  Monster Spray may cause rectal bleeding, stomach ulcers, nightmares, poor credit ratings, and an annoying nasal whistle that won't stop no matter how hard you dig in there.  Monster Spray is not recommended for the elimination of monsters, real or imagined.

And that's what happens when I forget to refresh the page before posting. Failure to refresh page before posting may lead to embarrassment and redundancy. Ask your doctor before failing to refresh.


Happens when we all go for the low hanging fruit.
 
2014-03-21 09:24:49 AM  
Users experiencing a prolonged and painful monster eradication lasting for more than four hours should consult their physician.
 
2014-03-21 09:26:58 AM  
Not to be confused with Monster Rain!

/obscure?
 
2014-03-21 09:28:45 AM  

The5thElement: Unfortunately, it's completely ineffective on the closet monsters.


It's ok now.  Fred Phelps is dead
 
2014-03-21 09:31:53 AM  
In my day we had "the monster words" and they did just fine.

/offer not valid against rabid St. Bernards
 
2014-03-21 09:37:21 AM  

stuhayes2010: I use a spray bottle of water to kill monsters and bugs in my four year old's room.  Where's my Daily Fail story?


Here ya go:

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-21 09:40:43 AM  

5monkeys: I made monster spray for my two oldest daughters when they were little. It was glade with a home made label. The smell convinced them I was actually doing something. My a-hole ex-sil told them at 3 and 4 that there were monsters in their room to get back at her brother for something he did when they were kids.


Used to do this. Would just buy cheap air freshener from the dollar store and put a sticker on it. Jasmine usually. It cut the bedtime chatter down considerably.

Then one of the kids asked if there were monsters in the bathroom when Daddy went in there...
 
2014-03-21 09:48:06 AM  
FDA will fine them for dispensing a nonapproved drug. They better submit a patent and file with FDA before another company decides to market their product and lock them out of the monster spray market for several years.
 
2014-03-21 09:48:28 AM  
I'm going to have to keep this in mind. Right now the stuffed t-rex is holding the monsters at bay but I don't know how long that will last.
 
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