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(Chron)   Not news: Guy killed after falling from a hotel balcony during spring break. Fark: he was there acting as the chaperone for his daughter and her friends   (chron.com) divider line 50
    More: Ironic, balcony, stucco  
•       •       •

6322 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2014 at 9:40 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-20 09:16:23 PM  
Well, his daughter didn't fall of a balcony, so he was successful to a point.

Also: WHAR "FLORIDA" TAG??
 
2014-03-20 09:45:52 PM  
I bet it rains on her wedding day.
 
2014-03-20 09:47:46 PM  
Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet
 
2014-03-20 09:49:08 PM  
I guess you could say....

*glasses*

his spring break was broke

YEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
 
2014-03-20 09:50:16 PM  
He was trying to back up far enough to get all of them in a pillow fight picture.
 
2014-03-20 09:55:09 PM  
An autopsy is to be performed Thursday or March 21 in Florida to determine cause of death.

Abrupt deceleration following gravity-induced vertical momentum.
 
2014-03-20 09:59:43 PM  

reported: An autopsy is to be performed Thursday or March 21 in Florida to determine cause of death.

Abrupt deceleration following gravity-induced vertical momentum.


I think they want to determine if the fall was caused by daddy being stoned, or daddy instead having a heart attack during a hummer from a 16 year old with the always-laudable daddy issues.
 
2014-03-20 10:03:42 PM  

reported: An autopsy is to be performed Thursday or March 21 in Florida to determine cause of death.

Abrupt deceleration following gravity-induced vertical momentum.


Ah. Natural causes.
 
2014-03-20 10:03:44 PM  
I bet there is a novel-full of information behind that fall.
 
2014-03-20 10:03:59 PM  
Were his last words "Hold my beer."?
 
2014-03-20 10:05:55 PM  

Fart_Machine: Were his last words "Hold my beer."?


At 9:30 in the morning?

/oh hell, why not
//it was spring break after all
 
2014-03-20 10:07:43 PM  
That was ostensibly the reason he was there. Very responsible. However, we all know he was just there on the off chance that some of his daughter's friends decide to prance around topless.
 
2014-03-20 10:11:30 PM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet


you sound fat
 
2014-03-20 10:13:32 PM  
There was a 12th floor outdoor hallway to move between rooms?  Seems like that's just trying to up the frequency of something like this happening.
 
2014-03-20 10:26:50 PM  

cgraves67: That was ostensibly the reason he was there. Very responsible. However, we all know he was just there on the off chance that some of his daughter's friends decide to prance around topless.


Lets be honest, he was trying to screw them.
 
2014-03-20 10:26:53 PM  

Atomic Spunk: Fart_Machine: Were his last words "Hold my beer."?

At 9:30 in the morning?

/oh hell, why not
//it was spring break after all


You can't say you've been drinking all day unless you start first thing in the morning.
 
2014-03-20 10:28:58 PM  

rockforever: cgraves67: That was ostensibly the reason he was there. Very responsible. However, we all know he was just there on the off chance that some of his daughter's friends decide to prance around topless.

Lets be honest, he was trying to screw them.


A man can dream...
 
2014-03-20 10:29:54 PM  
"Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?
 
2014-03-20 10:30:29 PM  

dogawful: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet

you sound fat


Well, my childhood nicknames were Birdlegs and (String)bean, so.
/love me, love my level 90 paladin
 
2014-03-20 10:32:40 PM  
WTF is a 62 year old guy chaperoning what I would assume is a bunch of late teen or early 20s girls? That would seem to put a damper on the vacation for the chicks, especially since he plummeted 120 feet to his death. Bummer!
 
2014-03-20 10:36:40 PM  
Daughter to friends when she heard the news: "See, I TOLD you he would ruin this week for me!"
 
2014-03-20 10:45:08 PM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: dogawful: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet

you sound fat

Well, my childhood nicknames were Birdlegs and (String)bean, so.
/love me, love my level 90 paladin


Ah. So you ate away your pain at being called skinny. It all makes sense now fatty.
 
2014-03-20 10:52:44 PM  
Poor helicopter parent.
 
2014-03-20 10:53:21 PM  

Jument: rockforever: cgraves67: That was ostensibly the reason he was there. Very responsible. However, we all know he was just there on the off chance that some of his daughter's friends decide to prance around topless.

Lets be honest, he was trying to screw them.

A man can dream...


A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or else what are safety codes for?
 
2014-03-20 11:06:39 PM  

nyseattitude: "Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?


2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-20 11:11:13 PM  
I don't understand what the deal is with Panama City.

There are people packing all the high-rise condos all along the gulf coast during Spring Break, but Panama City Beach is where most of the deaths happen.
 
2014-03-20 11:19:01 PM  
Wait just a GODDAMN  MINUTE!!!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Is his daughter and her friends hot?
 
2014-03-20 11:25:34 PM  
I'm going with dropped cell phone or suicide. If it's suicide maybe he hooked up with one of his girl's friends.
 
2014-03-20 11:28:33 PM  

Por que tan serioso: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: dogawful: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet

you sound fat

Well, my childhood nicknames were Birdlegs and (String)bean, so.
/love me, love my level 90 paladin

Ah. So you ate away your pain at being called skinny. It all makes sense now fatty.


dontpaniconline.com
 
2014-03-20 11:35:46 PM  

Boo_Guy: He was trying to back up far enough to get all of them in a pillow fight picture.


Gold Jerry, gold!
 
2014-03-20 11:36:34 PM  

nyseattitude: "Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?


Everybody dies bro. Get over it. If Darwin had it his way this guy wouldn't make it to 62, but we protect the potential award winners for I don't know what reason.
 
2014-03-20 11:42:33 PM  

nyseattitude: "Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?


*backs away slowly*
 
2014-03-20 11:45:13 PM  

BLayingBeads: nyseattitude: "Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?

Everybody dies bro. Get over it. If Darwin had it his way this guy wouldn't make it to 62, but we protect the potential award winners for I don't know what reason.


I read that initially as a joke. Like he posted five or six different comments of the type you usually find in brony threads. I just realized that it was meant to be read all together.
 
2014-03-20 11:53:44 PM  
I knew a guy who was thrown off a balcony while vacationing in Mexico.

He had it coming.

Some of them have it coming.
 
2014-03-20 11:54:25 PM  

wellreadneck: Poor helicopter parent.


Apparently, he sucked at auto-rotations.
 
2014-03-21 12:12:06 AM  

Derwood: Daughter to friends when she heard the news: "See, I TOLD you he would ruin this week for me!"


I was thinking more 'he is going to regret this'
 
2014-03-21 12:23:41 AM  

VladTheEmailer: I bet it rains on her wedding day.


And isn't it *unfortunate*. Don't you think? A little too *unfortunate*.. I really do think.
 
2014-03-21 12:26:34 AM  

BLayingBeads: nyseattitude: "Not news: guy killed"

Really? Yeah, welcome to fark blah blah blah...shove it up your ....

Are you really that disconnected that another Human Being dying has no effect on you?

Really?

I understand this is a blog but dismissing peoples death as "Not news"?  Is that really a level that you have been conditioned to endorse? Maybe you should "Un condition" yourself.

WTF is wrong with you?

Everybody dies bro. Get over it. If Darwin had it his way this guy wouldn't make it to 62, but we protect the potential award winners for I don't know what reason.


Thank you for stating the obvious. Considering "we", as people, make up the majority of people, why should " we" continue to fund such avenues when we know it will result in the same situations we have been stuck in for the last thirty years?

Your answers are the same garbage we have been receiving for years on end and the results are the same. More for you and your "friends" and less for us.
 
2014-03-21 12:58:08 AM  
Wonder if she'll be looking forward to next years spring break,
 
2014-03-21 12:59:49 AM  

Boo_Guy: He was trying to back up far enough to get all of them in a pillow fight picture.


Found cause of death right here.
 
2014-03-21 02:15:06 AM  
Do you think he heard the cars rolling by out on 441?
 
2014-03-21 02:51:04 AM  
No else thinks it odd a 62-year-old had a daughter on spring break?  Who was he?  Tony Randall?
 
2014-03-21 03:36:09 AM  

wesmon: I don't understand what the deal is with Panama City.

There are people packing all the high-rise condos all along the gulf coast during Spring Break, but Panama City Beach is where most of the deaths happen.


Gravity is about 27% stronger here.
 
2014-03-21 04:41:58 AM  

Boo_Guy: He was trying to back up far enough to get all of them in a pillow fight picture.


Winner!
 
2014-03-21 07:01:19 AM  
nyseattitude: <-------Irony?
 
2014-03-21 07:25:37 AM  
I don't have a daughter, but there ain't no way I'd go with her on spring break if I did.  Nothing good could come of seeing her get railed, or trying to control my old bone in front of her little friends.
 
2014-03-21 07:31:35 AM  
Since this guy was an overprotective father there to watch his little princess, I wonder if he tangled with a couple frat boys and it turned ugly. Maybe he cock blocked them, told them off and maybe got in a fight the night before. Then the frat boys (who never stopped drinking and drugging from the night before) found dad the next morning and decided to test how good of a helicopter parent he really is.
 
2014-03-21 07:54:23 AM  
Sex act gone wrong (or right, depending on what they were trying)
 
2014-03-21 08:10:53 AM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: dogawful: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: Spring break + chaperone = pretty fail.

Then again what do I know. I was a boring kid who didn't need a chaperone. Never had money for getaway trips anyway and spent my spring breaks playing video games.

/can't get the herp from those
//yet

you sound fat

Well, my childhood nicknames were Birdlegs and (String)bean, so.
/love me, love my level 90 paladin


you sound like you your elbows are too pointy
/lol
 
2014-03-21 11:50:19 AM  

Doc Batarang: I knew a guy who was thrown off a balcony while vacationing in Mexico.

He had it coming.

Some of them have it coming.


We all having it coming, doc.
 
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