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(NBC Philadelphia)   Car crashes into doughnut shop, dozens injured   (nbcphiladelphia.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, vehicle accident, Northeast Philadelphia, the elderly, Frankford Avenue, Dunkin' Donuts  
•       •       •

2088 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Mar 2014 at 2:20 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



52 Comments   (+0 »)
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2014-03-18 12:51:45 PM  
HotW candidate
 
2014-03-18 01:05:45 PM  
hahaha, I've only thumbs-upped like 5 links the entire time I've been on Fark, but this is one of them.
 
2014-03-18 01:06:57 PM  
That means "thirteens" injured, right?
 
2014-03-18 01:17:37 PM  
The driver had a glazed look in his eyes. There were a lot of holes in the story he told the cops. He seemed fried.
 
2014-03-18 01:21:37 PM  
Put them in a box and send them away.
 
2014-03-18 01:27:04 PM  
They're gonna knead a whole lot of dough to fix that place
 
2014-03-18 01:37:19 PM  
Now now.  Let's not sugar coat this...
 
2014-03-18 02:03:33 PM  
You all should be battered for these terrible buns, er puns.
 
2014-03-18 02:04:41 PM  
Hopefully there was someone there to help.blogs.browardpalmbeach.com
 
2014-03-18 02:21:15 PM  
HOTY
golfclaps.jpg
 
2014-03-18 02:22:49 PM  
Clean, simple, shows nice restraint while still getting the point across. Very nicely executed headline.  :)
 
2014-03-18 02:23:02 PM  
There's a cruller on the loose!
 
2014-03-18 02:23:11 PM  
Fark is in rare form today.  :-)
 
2014-03-18 02:24:14 PM  
HA. I get it.
 
2014-03-18 02:24:50 PM  
Nice one schlubby...

31.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-03-18 02:25:01 PM  
Oh, such cruller-ty.
 
2014-03-18 02:25:15 PM  

johnsoninca: That means "thirteens" injured, right?


Right.  Assorted.
 
2014-03-18 02:25:43 PM  
I blame Cosmo.

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-18 02:27:42 PM  
Headline rustled my Jimmies.
 
2014-03-18 02:27:58 PM  
Police department grief counselors working overtime in triage center.
 
2014-03-18 02:28:35 PM  

phenn: Fark is in rare form today.  :-)


Generally, headline quality has been up. I approve!
 
2014-03-18 02:28:54 PM  
Headline would have been better if it said 'dozens of cops injured'
 
2014-03-18 02:29:03 PM  
Let me guess, elderly person "confused the gas with the brake".

*click*

The driver, who is in his 80s, appeared confused, according to Butala.

Bring it on, James Randi.
 
2014-03-18 02:33:11 PM  
The elderly driver says he thought the car was in reverse, not drive, when he hit the accelerator outside the Dunkin' Donuts at Shelly Plaza along Frankford Avenue in the Torresdale section of the city around 8:30 a.m. Tuesday.

i43.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-18 02:33:11 PM  
Came for the pun, left satisfied.
 
2014-03-18 02:33:13 PM  

alizeran: I blame Cosmo.


Sweet baby Jesus, that's not right!!!!

Whatever happened to plain old sloppy blowies? God, Cosmo is stupid. If I did that to some dude, he is washing afterward with soap several times. Just... no.

/End threadjack
//gah
 
2014-03-18 02:36:18 PM  

Needlessly Complicated: alizeran: I blame Cosmo.

Sweet baby Jesus, that's not right!!!!

Whatever happened to plain old sloppy blowies?


We're talking about Cosmo. They're insane.
 
2014-03-18 02:38:58 PM  
i16.photobucket.com
:) Nice
 
2014-03-18 02:44:29 PM  
I guess he had some issues finding the farmers market?
 
2014-03-18 02:50:02 PM  
In other news, Tim Horton is still dead.
 
2014-03-18 02:52:53 PM  
Driving elderly is as bad as driving drunk. People who get behind the wheel while elderly should be subject to the same treatment as people who get behind the wheel drunk.
 
2014-03-18 02:54:22 PM  
Amazingly swift police response.
 
2014-03-18 02:57:27 PM  

That Guy Jeff: People who get behind the wheel while elderly should be subject to the same treatment as people who get behind the wheel drunk.


Such as getting a beej from the drunk chick in the passenger seat?
 
2014-03-18 03:00:50 PM  
HotD for sure!

Bravo subby.
 
2014-03-18 03:03:12 PM  

brantgoose: In other news, Tim Horton is still dead.


i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-18 03:07:11 PM  
Ich bin ein Berliner !
 
2014-03-18 03:08:22 PM  

Billy Liar: Ich bin ein Berliner !


I did Nazi that coming.
 
2014-03-18 03:50:01 PM  

That Guy Jeff: Driving elderly is as bad as driving drunk. People who get behind the wheel while elderly should be subject to the same treatment as people who get behind the wheel drunk.


So, put them in rehab and allow them to drive again after they've been a good boy for 6 months? I don't THINK so.
 
2014-03-18 03:59:01 PM  
Good one, Subby.
 
2014-03-18 03:59:31 PM  
Gross?
 
2014-03-18 04:01:06 PM  
No objections were raised.
 
2014-03-18 04:01:40 PM  

nytmare: That Guy Jeff: Driving elderly is as bad as driving drunk. People who get behind the wheel while elderly should be subject to the same treatment as people who get behind the wheel drunk.

So, put them in rehab and allow them to drive again after they've been a good boy for 6 months? I don't THINK so.


I don't know where you live, but here first offense is 1 day (if you pay to complete a course) to 6 months jail time, license suspended for a year then probationary license for 2 years that is revoked if you get pulled over (not even ticketed), thousands of dollars in fines, and an interlock you have to pay to maintenance every month for a year once you get your license back. One *could* call it ridiculous and overbearing and a payout to the interlock industry. Especially considering that there is no legal limit here; any detection of anything, even having an open bottle of NyQuil, can get you convicted. But hey, if that's the punishment, at least apply it to other impaired drivers as well. See how it stands up politically.

So, put the elderly in jail, suspend their licenses, fine them thousands of dollars, and put an "age detector" on their car that won't start it if it detects "old person smell".
 
2014-03-18 04:05:56 PM  
RTFA subby.  Only 1 person was injured.


/no longer amusing
//if dozens really were injured I could see the humor.
 
2014-03-18 04:06:59 PM  

That Guy Jeff: So, put the elderly in jail, suspend their licenses, fine them thousands of dollars, and put an "age detector" on their car that won't start it if it detects "old person smell".


I think you're onto something. Think of the lives that would be saved.
 
2014-03-18 04:12:53 PM  

Dragonflew: That Guy Jeff: So, put the elderly in jail, suspend their licenses, fine them thousands of dollars, and put an "age detector" on their car that won't start it if it detects "old person smell".

I think you're onto something. Think of the lives that would be saved.


Actually... I should start a fake company and press release for an interlock that detects "old person smell". I'll have to research what exactly old person smell is, but it shouldn't be too hard. Some stock photos, a lot of marketing garbage, and I bet I could get a bunch of old people and news agencies whipped up into a frenzy.
 
2014-03-18 04:21:00 PM  

That Guy Jeff: Dragonflew: That Guy Jeff: So, put the elderly in jail, suspend their licenses, fine them thousands of dollars, and put an "age detector" on their car that won't start it if it detects "old person smell".

I think you're onto something. Think of the lives that would be saved.

Actually... I should start a fake company and press release for an interlock that detects "old person smell". I'll have to research what exactly old person smell is


Moth balls and lavender.
 
2014-03-18 04:23:58 PM  
Missing from the article:

"Accounts by the 27 police officers who also witnessed the event were consistent with Butala's account."
 
2014-03-18 05:27:57 PM  
been a long day already so that headline gave me a chuckle.  nice one subby
 
2014-03-18 05:43:35 PM  

Needlessly Complicated: alizeran: I blame Cosmo.

Sweet baby Jesus, that's not right!!!!

Whatever happened to plain old sloppy blowies? God, Cosmo is stupid. If I did that to some dude, he is washing afterward with soap several times. Just... no.

/End threadjack
//gah


How YOU doin'?

/oblig
 
2014-03-18 09:53:20 PM  
I LOL'd
 
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