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(Daily Mail)   Rachel "Bunny" Mellon passes away at 103. Her obituary reads like a Mad Libs of the last 100 years   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 34
    More: Interesting, Listerine, Senator John Edwards, humans, President John F. Kennedy, Mick Jagger, Kenneth Starr, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Andrew Mellon  
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8167 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Mar 2014 at 10:16 AM (18 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-18 08:43:10 AM
She was pre-deceased by her husband of many years, Thornton.
 
2014-03-18 10:20:06 AM
Did she leave her fortune to her hares?

/dammit....and I was SO proud of that submission
 
2014-03-18 10:22:26 AM
died of natural causes Monday at her 4,000-acre horse farm in Upperville, Virginia.

White people problems.
Fark. that. Coont.
/She was not renowned for her philanthropy.
 
2014-03-18 10:23:15 AM

dittybopper: She was pre-deceased by her husband of many years, Thornton.


I've been pre-deceased by practically everyone who's ever lived.
 
2014-03-18 10:33:45 AM
Canned air to blow out the dust??????

/Sure, like me on Facebook. You'll be sorry.
 
2014-03-18 10:35:10 AM

vudukungfu: died of natural causes Monday at her 4,000-acre horse farm in Upperville, Virginia.

White people problems.
Fark. that. Coont.
/She was not renowned for her philanthropy.



No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.
 
2014-03-18 10:38:21 AM

Twist2005: The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia


I know what the Mellons did.
I'm from Pittsburgh.
The Carnegies did work.
The Friks did work.
The Mellons?
They were bankers!
to the Bonestriper with them!
 
2014-03-18 10:46:00 AM

vudukungfu: Twist2005: The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia

I know what the Mellons did.
I'm from Pittsburgh.
The Carnegies did work.
The Friks did work.
The Mellons?
They were bankers!
to the Bonestriper with them!


Well look who's pissed he didn't get added to the will for lubing her up for one last thrill.
 
2014-03-18 10:52:30 AM

Twist2005: vudukungfu: died of natural causes Monday at her 4,000-acre horse farm in Upperville, Virginia.

White people problems.
Fark. that. Coont.
/She was not renowned for her philanthropy.


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.


So she did a lot for the horse riding community which usually consists of the upper class people, cry me a river.
 
2014-03-18 10:53:55 AM

Savage Belief: vudukungfu: Twist2005: The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia

I know what the Mellons did.
I'm from Pittsburgh.
The Carnegies did work.
The Friks did work.
The Mellons?
They were bankers!
to the Bonestriper with them!

Well look who's pissed he didn't get added to the will for lubing her up for one last thrill.


Horse people as suck ass nuts.
Uber wealthy.
4000 acres?
I could sustain 800 people in an agrarian community on that.
Fark her kennedy humping corpse.
 
2014-03-18 11:01:44 AM
Twist2005:


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.

So--white people giving money to white people activities. And thats what philanthropy is.
 
2014-03-18 11:08:05 AM

Best Princess Celestia: And thats what philanthropy is


Only if you ride equestrian. You riding western, no money for you.
 
2014-03-18 11:11:31 AM
You people need Jesus
 
2014-03-18 11:22:11 AM
 
2014-03-18 11:23:53 AM
FTFA: Her name also found its way onto front pages after former investment adviser Kenneth Starr was sentenced to more than seven years in prison for defrauding clients.


Is this the same guy as the Clinton blowjob guy? Because I must've missed this story when it happened.
 
2014-03-18 11:29:05 AM

vudukungfu: Twist2005: The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia

I know what the Mellons did.
I'm from Pittsburgh.
The Carnegies did work.
The Friks did work.
The Mellons?
They were bankers!
to the Bonestriper with them!


Screw Frick. He was an asshole of the highest caliber. Somebody, uh, modified his wikipedia page a while back in a most amusing manner. Can't find a cache of it though, it's been fixed.

His estate did fund a rather nice museum though.
 
2014-03-18 11:29:59 AM

GrizzlyPouch: You people need Jesus


What the hell you mean "you people"?

And y'all motherfarkers need Talos.
 
2014-03-18 11:30:57 AM

Best Princess Celestia: Twist2005:


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.

So--white people giving money to white people activities. And thats what philanthropy is.


Education is a "white people activity?"
 
2014-03-18 11:37:35 AM

Best Princess Celestia: Twist2005:


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.

So--white people giving money to white people activities. And thats what philanthropy is.


Perhaps not, but giving $500,000,000 to charity while providing some of the art and endowing the National Gallery of Art is.
 
2014-03-18 11:47:48 AM

Towermonkey: His estate did fund a rather nice museum though.


He knew that kind of "kindness" would outlast the memory of his douchiness.
All those assholes were like that.
After the bought and paid for federal judge allowed 0.00 compensation to the survivors of the J-Town flood, Carnegie gave them a *gasp* Library.

Yeah, Ken Star, the guy who got caught farking some middle aged hosebag that posed for penthouse.
Real class ascts.
Bunch of elitist assholes.

typical KennedyTM style behavior.
 
2014-03-18 11:56:02 AM
Eh, Carnegie was least dickish of the bunch IMO. Morgan, Frick and Rockefeller were peckerwoods. The Johnstown thing was bad. The Homestead strike breaking was also pretty bad, I think we will agree. Carnegie at least seemed to have some sort of empathy and drive to create rather than destroy.
 
2014-03-18 12:19:32 PM

lamecomedian: Best Princess Celestia: Twist2005:


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.

So--white people giving money to white people activities. And thats what philanthropy is.

Education is a "white people activity?"

The equestrian part.

 
2014-03-18 12:46:37 PM

vudukungfu: died of natural causes Monday at her 4,000-acre horse farm in Upperville, Virginia.

White people problems.
Fark. that. Coont.
/She was not renowned for her philanthropy.


http://www.capecodonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20140318/NEW S/ 403180320/-1/NEWS01

"Mellon donated land to the Barnstable Land Trust as well as the Nantucket Conservation Foundation. "
 
2014-03-18 12:54:35 PM

Betep: "Mellon donated land to the Barnstable Land Trust as well as the Nantucket Conservation Foundation. "


Bunny sucked dick for a thousand dollars and would cut off her big toe for more.
 
2014-03-18 12:57:22 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: Did she leave her fortune to her hares?

/dammit....and I was SO proud of that submission


Some day, some where, you just know that a rich person will keep pet rabbits instead of cats or dogs, and when they die they will more or less literally* leave their money to their hares.

The editors will have a field day.

So let's spoil their fun by thinking up as many "hare" puns as we can and keeping them in reserve.

I'll start:

Hares and Assigns

Rabbits in-hare-it a vast In-hare-itence

Little gray hare strikes it rich, to live in luxury digs

Granny leaves fortune to little gray hare. Tweety non-pussed.

Family mad as march hares at will bequething everything to the hares

Wascally Wabbits get the lot


*Yes, I know that there is a big difference between rabbits and hares. It was, by the by, a swamp hare that attacked President Jimmy Carter--them's big critters with a kick like a mule, so it's not nearly as funny as Republicans seem to think.
 
2014-03-18 01:00:25 PM

phyrkrakr: FTFA: Her name also found its way onto front pages after former investment adviser Kenneth Starr was sentenced to more than seven years in prison for defrauding clients.


Is this the same guy as the Clinton blowjob guy? Because I must've missed this story when it happened.


Nope.

Kenneth I. Starr
 
2014-03-18 01:17:49 PM

vudukungfu: Betep: "Mellon donated land to the Barnstable Land Trust as well as the Nantucket Conservation Foundation. "

Bunny sucked dick for a thousand dollars and would cut off her big toe for more.


Rich white People Envy problems.
 
2014-03-18 01:20:21 PM

Betep: Rich white People Envy problems.


We can't all live ate the Cape, now, Skippy.
 
2014-03-18 01:29:46 PM
Here lies the body of Mary Lee; died at the age of a hundred and three. For fifteen years she kept her virginity; not a bad record for this vicinity.
 
2014-03-18 01:33:25 PM
Jordan Lambert's middle name was "Wheat". Listerine is named in honour of Joseph Lister, the Father of modern medical antisepsis, who had a long hard fight to convince doctors that they could be the cause and not the cure of infection. He stuck to his guns though and became the First Baron Lister. The Red Dwarf Lister, Dave Lister, is presumably named in irony because he is a slob.

I'm tempted to try to add him to my family tree as I have some Lamberts in Massachusetts and they may well have Southern cousins. On the other hand, if you add the Mellons to your family tree, you also add Richard the Scaiffe formerly known as Mellon Scaiffe to your family tree and he is one of the biggest dicks in God's creation. For one thing, he was the big money behind the Kill Bill Clinton campaign. Ultra-right wing to the point that the Mellons objected to him using their name as his middle name and he dropped it as they dropped him.

My only two Mellons are both Tafts and probably unrelated.
 
2014-03-18 02:07:30 PM

Twist2005: vudukungfu: died of natural causes Monday at her 4,000-acre horse farm in Upperville, Virginia.

White people problems.
Fark. that. Coont.
/She was not renowned for her philanthropy.


No, she was. The Mellons did a lot for the equestrian community in Virginia. A different kind of philanthropy than what you think, but still a sort of it. They did a lot of stuff for education and the arts, too.


I heard that her husband wrote a check to Grand Lakes University for an entire new building to house the School of Business.
 
2014-03-18 03:15:25 PM
 
2014-03-18 09:04:02 PM
Rose, that was not nice. I'd almost forgotten.
 
2014-03-18 11:33:13 PM

morg: Rose, that was not nice. I'd almost forgotten.


It's the little things in life...

No, really.  He's like four and a half feet tall.


/I'd rather live in a world with the Goddess Bunny than without
 
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