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(Northern Territory News)   Today's Fark-ready headline: Brothels rub prostitutes the wrong way   (ntnews.com.au) divider line 51
    More: Amusing, NT News, sex workers, whores, News Limited  
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4957 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Mar 2014 at 2:58 PM (40 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-17 01:21:06 PM  
 FTFHSex workers say illegal brothels are posing as massage parlours


 mrwgifs.com
 
2014-03-17 01:24:58 PM  
I feel this story will have a happy ending.
 
2014-03-17 02:12:26 PM  

EvilEgg: FTFHSex workers say illegal brothels are posing as massage parlours


 [mrwgifs.com image 333x250]

Who did they interview for this article, local hooker Rikki Romero?
 
2014-03-17 03:01:09 PM  
img.youtube.com
 
2014-03-17 03:02:37 PM  
I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS
 
2014-03-17 03:02:47 PM  
Come again, did I read that correctly?
 
2014-03-17 03:04:36 PM  
A couple jerkoffs are making the news to bolster their business.
 
2014-03-17 03:06:40 PM  
"They (clients) get a massage and a root for $100," one said.  "I'm not willing to let a stranger inside me for that."

Uh, isn't that called competition? Somebody is undercutting your prices - you either convince the customers that your service is superior and worth the premium, or you bring your prices down.  Makes no difference if you are selling widgets or sex.
 
2014-03-17 03:11:42 PM  
A  dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in  Las  Vegas and decided to  check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he  asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'
'No,'  she replied, 'I'm sorry it isn't.'
'Well,  if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'
'The  house gets $80 and the girls get $20,' she  answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the  union man stomped off down the street in search of a more  equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until  finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, 'Why yes  sir, this is a union house.  'We observe all union  rules.'
The  man asked, 'And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'  'The girls get $80 and the house gets $20..'
'That's  more like it!' the union man said.
He  handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a  stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde .
'I'd  like her,' he said.
'I'm  sure you would, sir,' said the Madam. Then she gestured to a  92-year old woman in the corner, 'but Ethel here has 67 years  seniority and according to union rules, she's  next.'
 
2014-03-17 03:15:53 PM  
As long as they don't rub me the wrong way, amirite fellas?
 
2014-03-17 03:18:00 PM  
I'll do anything I can the wrong way.
 
2014-03-17 03:19:27 PM  

Nothing To See Here: A  dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in  Las  Vegas and decided to  check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he  asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'
'No,'  she replied, 'I'm sorry it isn't.'
'Well,  if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'
'The  house gets $80 and the girls get $20,' she  answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the  union man stomped off down the street in search of a more  equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until  finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, 'Why yes  sir, this is a union house.  'We observe all union  rules.'
The  man asked, 'And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'  'The girls get $80 and the house gets $20..'
'That's  more like it!' the union man said.
He  handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a  stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde .
'I'd  like her,' he said.
'I'm  sure you would, sir,' said the Madam. Then she gestured to a  92-year old woman in the corner, 'but Ethel here has 67 years  seniority and according to union rules, she's  next.'


Nice.
 
2014-03-17 03:21:24 PM  

exick: EvilEgg: FTFHSex workers say illegal brothels are posing as massage parlours


 [mrwgifs.com image 333x250]
Who did they interview for this article, local hooker Rikki Romero?


Unless he had a change of heart.
 
2014-03-17 03:24:05 PM  

Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS


It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.
 
2014-03-17 03:25:54 PM  
This is a story about the oldest profession known to humanity and hookers vying for survival, from Darwin, Australia, and that's the best headline?
 
2014-03-17 03:28:10 PM  
You give glove a bad name.
 
2014-03-17 03:28:24 PM  

Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS


*belly laugh*
 
2014-03-17 03:30:27 PM  
Really need to get the crick in my, ahem, neck worked out.
 
2014-03-17 03:33:15 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.


I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.
 
2014-03-17 03:40:20 PM  

Nothing To See Here: A couple jerkoffs are making the news to bolster their business.


It sounds like evolution in action.  In business, as in nature it's natural selection!

s18.postimg.org
 
2014-03-17 03:40:44 PM  

akula: God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.

I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.


The US is one of the few countries where is illegal.
 
2014-03-17 03:41:01 PM  

akula: I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.


Fusion restaurants do a good business.  I would suppose a Swedish/Polynesian brothel would be rolling in dough.
 
2014-03-17 03:42:00 PM  

akula: God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.

I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.


i1.ytimg.com
"I can't be racist, I had sex w/ a black chick!"
 
2014-03-17 03:51:32 PM  

Anderson's Pooper: I would suppose a Swedish/Polynesian brothel would be rolling in dough.


I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
 
2014-03-17 03:52:35 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.


Umm... except that most men like something different than what they could normally get. So a guy that would only date white girls might very well prefer mexican/asian/black hookers.
 
2014-03-17 03:53:48 PM  
Meat puppets.
 
2014-03-17 04:00:15 PM  
I paid good money for this so i'll rub you any damn way I want.
 
2014-03-17 04:02:02 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.


i actually think legal regulated prostitution is a good thing....hell, making it illegal does not stop people from doing it, so might as well....at least you get to make sure the prostitutes are clean, and are better able to safeguard women who choose that industry (by making sure they chose it, providing and counseling and rehab programs they need, etc)
 
2014-03-17 04:04:33 PM  

brandent: Nothing To See Here: A  dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in  Las  Vegas and decided to  check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he  asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'
'No,'  she replied, 'I'm sorry it isn't.'
'Well,  if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'
'The  house gets $80 and the girls get $20,' she  answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the  union man stomped off down the street in search of a more  equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until  finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, 'Why yes  sir, this is a union house.  'We observe all union  rules.'
The  man asked, 'And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'  'The girls get $80 and the house gets $20..'
'That's  more like it!' the union man said.
He  handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a  stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde .
'I'd  like her,' he said.
'I'm  sure you would, sir,' said the Madam. Then she gestured to a  92-year old woman in the corner, 'but Ethel here has 67 years  seniority and according to union rules, she's  next.'

Nice.


A dog named Coffee Break

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs were. The first, an engineer, had a dog named "T-Square." The second, an accountant, had a dog named "Slide Rule." The third, a chemist, had a dog called "Measure," and the fourth man was a Union member.

To show off, the engineer called to his dog, "T-Square, do your stuff." T-Square trotted over to a desk, took some paper and a pen, and promptly drew a circle, a square and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that was pretty good, but the accountant said his dog could do better. He called to his dog and said, "Slide Rule, do your stuff." Slide Rule went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He then divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each.

Everyone agreed that was good, but the chemist said his dog could do better. he called his dog and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard, then poured in exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop.

Everyone agreed that was very good, then they turned to the Union member and said, "What can your dog do?"

The Union member stood up, called his dog and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff." Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, shiat on the paper, farked the other three dogs, claimed he'd injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Worker's Compensation, and went home on sick leave.

/has an aluminum Pickett. oh yes.
 
2014-03-17 04:04:56 PM  
Telos


God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.


Umm... except that most men like something different than what they could normally get. So a guy that would only date white girls might very well prefer mexican/asian/black hookers.


True, but there is also a general public that know what they like weather it be the blackened chicken fettuccini or the one armed midget who wears a horse head mask.
 
2014-03-17 04:05:41 PM  

GoldDude: "They (clients) get a massage and a root for $100," one said.  "I'm not willing to let a stranger inside me for that."

Uh, isn't that called competition? Somebody is undercutting your prices - you either convince the customers that your service is superior and worth the premium, or you bring your prices down.  Makes no difference if you are selling widgets or sex.


it can also be dignity, and feelings of self worth.
 
2014-03-17 04:06:10 PM  
A Root?
 
2014-03-17 04:25:34 PM  

susler: A Root?


That is the cheapest dentistry I've ever heard of.  Even a shot of novocaine costs about $100.
 
2014-03-17 04:34:48 PM  

susler: A Root?


It's slang...saying you root for a team while in Australia would be like saying to someone in New York that you "fark for the Yankees."
 
2014-03-17 04:36:31 PM  

susler: A Root?


I was pretty sure of the meaning from the context, but I looked it up just to be sure:

Here's what Urban Dictionary has to day (NSFWL):

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=root
 
2014-03-17 04:47:15 PM  
If you're feeling down depressed and lonely
I know a place where we can go...
 
2014-03-17 04:49:09 PM  

susler: A Root?


never listened to henry rollins, i take it
 
2014-03-17 04:54:53 PM  

MemeSlave: Meat puppets.


Humans and their mating behavior as consumer products.
 
2014-03-17 04:59:38 PM  
cdn.compliancesigns.com
 
2014-03-17 05:00:57 PM  
I first read the headline as  Brothers, which I thought was crazy, but then I saw there was no 'Obvious' tag, so I re-read it.
 
2014-03-17 05:15:52 PM  
1. Make brothels legal again (they were until the early 1900s), but keep streetwalking illegal.

2. Require brothels to have a nurse, security guards, and an accountant on staff.

3. Require them to submit to inspections on a regular basis to ensure safe & clean conditions.

4. Require them to pay taxes like any other business, with the inclusion of an additional 2% Leisure Tax.

5. Watch as people stop patronizing streetwalkers and pimps, and brothels take off as a HUGE business.

6. Use the ridiculous amounts of tax money reaped from the legalized brothels to fund a national health care system, thus removing the last health concerns from allowing people to have sex with prostitutes in these brothels.

7. Watch as the general populace becomes happier, healthier, and less stressed out, therefore becoming more productive workers and less likely to shoot up a mall full of people.


It should be noted that these rules would apply to prostitutes of all genders, so yes, there would be an outlet for both men AND women (and anything in-between).

I believe that brothels are necessary to society. There will always be people who are too ugly, too shy, too antisocial, or too busy to have a mate, but these folks are human and they NEED to have sex, they need to be touched, they need to have that stress relief and joy that sex brings. Brothels make it possible for everyone to have sex, regardless of their appearance, their race, their gender, their psychological state, or their level of confidence.

And this should just be obvious: A society that is getting laid is a happy, productive, safer society.

However, for those who are concerned about adultery being a problem with legal brothels in our society, we could add another rule: Brothels can check public records and determine if you're married, and if you are, they may charge an additional 10% Philanderer's Tax. On top of this, the lobbies and entryways of these legal brothels would have security cameras and brothels would be compelled to share security footage with the authorities (in the investigation of crimes), and with court officials involved in divorce proceedings, i.e. these would be admissible as evidence if you're getting a divorce and are claiming no adultery took place.
 
2014-03-17 05:23:35 PM  
akula:
I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.

I was looking at it at more of a "supply and demand" thing. Filling the Chinese slots of this brothel of yours would be easy, but Finnish would be quite a bit more difficult.
 
2014-03-17 05:29:12 PM  

Nix Nightbird: And this should just be obvious: A society that is getting laid is a happy, productive, safer society.


This may be the most inarguable statement ever posted to Fark.  I'd vote for you.
 
2014-03-17 05:41:49 PM  

Nix Nightbird: And this should just be obvious: A society that is getting laid is a happy, productive, safer society.


"Remove prostitutes from human affairs, and you will unsettle everything because of lusts " - St Augustine
 
2014-03-17 06:04:03 PM  

Telos: Nix Nightbird: And this should just be obvious: A society that is getting laid is a happy, productive, safer society.

"Remove prostitutes from human affairs, and you will unsettle everything because of lusts " - St Augustine


Exactly.

The sucky thing (no pun intended) is that our society was in favor of prostitution until the same folks in the temperance movement who were pushing for the prohibition of alcohol (namely: Methodists, Baptists, Presbyterians, Disciples of Christ, and Congregationalists) pushed for the prohibition of prostitution as well. As a result, we made it illegal when it previously wasn't, and unlike alcohol prohibition we never repealed these laws or tried to transform them into regulation instead of outright prohibition.

We have the faces of men on our money (right by the words "In God We Trust") who were all patrons of prostitutes. Benjamin Franklin was especially fond of them.

It always comes down to this. The religious people don't want anyone to have any fun because they're suffering from some sort of sick religious guilt (or perhaps it's just jealousy and sour grapes). They push for laws that don't reflect the needs of society but represent the "will" of their interpretation of God... And they're almost always dead-wrong about it when they do so.
 
2014-03-17 06:19:27 PM  

beverly8: God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.

i actually think legal regulated prostitution is a good thing....hell, making it illegal does not stop people from doing it, so might as well....at least you get to make sure the prostitutes are clean, and are better able to safeguard women who choose that industry (by making sure they chose it, providing and counseling and rehab programs they need, etc)


That's the argument here.  "Massage parlors" are not regulated like prostitution there which makes the prostitutes mad.  I don't blame them.  I agree with you, though, I don't think regulated prostitution such as they have in Nevada is harmful, and probably safer than unregulated streetwalkers or call girls.
 
2014-03-17 06:47:48 PM  
They will rub any way you pay them to rub, so I'm just thinking somebody need to pay more.
 
2014-03-17 07:38:06 PM  

Billy Liar: beverly8: God-is-a-Taco: Random Anonymous Blackmail: I think they are getting pissed because immigrants are doing the same job for less.

//THEY TOOK OUR hand JERBS

It's interesting to see it for prostitution since it's rarely legal. Truly the free market fixes everything.
Although prostitution might be one of the least vulnerable to this because of racial preferences.

i actually think legal regulated prostitution is a good thing....hell, making it illegal does not stop people from doing it, so might as well....at least you get to make sure the prostitutes are clean, and are better able to safeguard women who choose that industry (by making sure they chose it, providing and counseling and rehab programs they need, etc)

That's the argument here.  "Massage parlors" are not regulated like prostitution there which makes the prostitutes mad.  I don't blame them.  I agree with you, though, I don't think regulated prostitution such as they have in Nevada is harmful, and probably safer than unregulated streetwalkers or call girls.


i dont know why they arent...i thought everyone knew about massage parlors...i have never even been to one and i can tell you what they do there...maybe they will find out about bath houses next.
e them regulated too.
 
2014-03-17 09:20:15 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: akula:
I don't know about that. Can you imagine the legal brothel that could sell a "Fark around the world" pass where you can get major nationality groups? Sure, there's racial preferences, but there's also the exotic temptation of that which isn't common.

I was looking at it at more of a "supply and demand" thing. Filling the Chinese slots of this brothel of yours would be easy, but Finnish would be quite a bit more difficult.


Nah, I think guys could finish pretty easily.

Oh, wait, you meant the nationality...

Yeah, there's some that would be particularly difficult, but when guys think of "farking around the world" they aren't usually separating out Finland, Sweden, Norway, and Denmark. Pretty much any tall blonde caucasian would work.
 
2014-03-18 02:21:29 AM  

Nothing To See Here: A  dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in  Las  Vegas and decided to  check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he  asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'
'No,'  she replied, 'I'm sorry it isn't.'
'Well,  if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'
'The  house gets $80 and the girls get $20,' she  answered.
Offended at such unfair dealings, the  union man stomped off down the street in search of a more  equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until  finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, 'Why yes  sir, this is a union house.  'We observe all union  rules.'
The  man asked, 'And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'  'The girls get $80 and the house gets $20..'
'That's  more like it!' the union man said.
He  handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a  stunningly attractive green-eyed blonde .
'I'd  like her,' he said.
'I'm  sure you would, sir,' said the Madam. Then she gestured to a  92-year old woman in the corner, 'but Ethel here has 67 years  seniority and according to union rules, she's  next.'


img.fark.net
 
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