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(Daily Star)   You know the only thing more terrifying than having a giant huntsman spider jump out of your luggage when you return from a trip to Africa? Having a giant pregnant huntsman spider jump out of your luggage (pics, but farkfarkfark giant spider)   (dailystar.co.uk) divider line 159
    More: Scary, distribution company, Cameroon  
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22039 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Mar 2014 at 12:38 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



159 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-03-17 11:00:06 AM  
My mother had one of those in her room on vacation. Hotel staff were afraid to tell her about it because most tourists would act like the reporter of the linked story. Meanwhile all I see are tiny little spiders who can barely hurt a fly.
 
2014-03-17 11:29:28 AM  
/legitimately submitted this with a better headline a few days ago
//not even going to claim I'm not bitter
///back to drinking...
 
2014-03-17 11:53:34 AM  
www.samefacts.com

Geez, they weren't kidding.  That thing is pretty big.
 
2014-03-17 12:19:38 PM  
Yes, but was she PREGNANT?

It's IMPORTANT.
 
2014-03-17 12:39:18 PM  
petcenter.info
 
2014-03-17 12:39:52 PM  
inb4clockpic
 
2014-03-17 12:40:25 PM  
media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2014-03-17 12:41:24 PM  
FTA: "They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."

I would have given her a refreshing can of Brakleen, personally.
www.ipdusa.com
 
2014-03-17 12:41:43 PM  
Poor little spider looks terrified.

Huntsmen can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively but they are not dangerous to humans.

Grow up, arachnophobes. It's just a little bug. If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.
 
2014-03-17 12:42:38 PM  
Better to kill it while it's still pregnant than to have thousands of babies already hatched in your luggage.
 
2014-03-17 12:42:38 PM  
"venomous huntsman spider "

That's all spiders champ.
 
2014-03-17 12:43:01 PM  
Damn, that's a metric buttload of names mommy spider has to think about for her kiddies.
 
2014-03-17 12:43:33 PM  
static1.fjcdn.com
 
2014-03-17 12:43:43 PM  
"And to add to the terror, the venomous huntsman spider..."

Well, hell. It sounds like this thing is the worst thing ever. I mean, that's pretty damning stuff going on in that sentence.

"Huntsmen can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively but they are not dangerous to humans."

For fark's sake. Sensationalist bullshiat.
 
2014-03-17 12:44:29 PM  
I commend her for resisting the urge to kill it with fire.

I would try very hard to do so, but I don't know if I would ultimately be successful.
 
2014-03-17 12:44:53 PM  
FTFA:

And to add to the terror, the venomous huntsman spider............

......................
.......................
..........................

Huntsmen can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively but they are not dangerous to humans.



At least they mentioned the non-dangerous part after hyping-up the story at the beginning.

/Fully confess I would freak out if I saw one in my luggage.
 
2014-03-17 12:47:02 PM  
ClockSpider
 
2014-03-17 12:47:09 PM  
I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.
 
2014-03-17 12:47:13 PM  
I would love to say I would kill it with fire, but in reality I would run away like a biatch shiatting myself and telling my girlfriend to get rid of it. I'm a realist.
 
2014-03-17 12:47:18 PM  
She's so cute and loveable, I just want take her home and bugger her.
 
2014-03-17 12:48:18 PM  
Don't Aussies like this spider since it kills much more deadly things?
 
2014-03-17 12:48:48 PM  
How Fox news would tell this story- "Pregnant African sneaks into country- Immediately provided wih free room and board."
 
2014-03-17 12:49:14 PM  
I often do the "what would happen if I ran into any of these critters from D&D" kinda thing in my head.

dm: you see a giant spider (dog to horse sized)
player: I attack!

real life
player: I shiat myself into dehydration and fall into a coma before it can even move.
 
2014-03-17 12:50:51 PM  

vengethis: FTA: "They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."

I would have given her a refreshing can of Brakleen, personally.
[www.ipdusa.com image 640x480]


And a match. Just sayin'.
 
2014-03-17 12:50:56 PM  
wouldn't it be a Huntswoman spider?

/pc

Wocka wocka wocka.
 
2014-03-17 12:51:00 PM  

mbillips: Huntsmen Humans can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively scream and wet their pants

 like little girls but they are not dangerous to humans spiders.

Fixed, you pussies.
 
2014-03-17 12:52:12 PM  

drjekel_mrhyde: She's so cute and loveable, I just want take her home and bugger her.

*snicker*

 
2014-03-17 12:53:11 PM  
Um. The spider actually called the 'giant huntsman' is from Laos. Which is nowhere near Cameroon. I'm calling shenanigans.
 
2014-03-17 12:53:36 PM  

Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.


Fark you Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you  Fark you

NOPE

Fark you

/off to buy sleeping earplugs
 
2014-03-17 12:56:08 PM  
Spider thread!

i61.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-17 12:56:46 PM  

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: mbillips: Huntsmen Humans can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively scream and wet their pants like little girls but they are not dangerous to humans spiders.

Fixed, you pussies.


The flip flop that I use for spider slaying would disagree with that last part.

/ I only kill the really big ones or the ones who happen to crawl out when chicks are over.
 
2014-03-17 12:57:39 PM  
While arachnids, aren't huntsmen a different class of them than spiders?
 
2014-03-17 12:57:43 PM  
jokideo.com
 
2014-03-17 12:58:03 PM  
captured it with a carton box.

Well? Was it a carton or was it a box?
Don't they teach you English at THE University?
 
2014-03-17 12:58:20 PM  
i61.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-17 12:58:26 PM  
What's worse than one HUMONGOUS, VENOMOUS Huntsman spider crawling out of your suitcase?  One HUMONGOUS, VENOMOUS Huntsman spider with an egg sac full of SOON TO BECOME HUMONGOUS, VENOMOUS & VORACIOUS Huntsman spider babies crawling out of your suitcase, that's what.

That's like what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm?  Biting into an apple and finding half a worm.
 
2014-03-17 12:58:27 PM  
Came in here for "babies are a joy forever" spider, leaving disappointed.

And leaving you with this:
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-17 12:58:53 PM  
www.dvdizzy.com
 
2014-03-17 01:01:01 PM  
i62.tinypic.com

This made me laugh way more than it probably should have.
 
2014-03-17 01:01:48 PM  
Colleague Rachel Agnew added to the Evening Standard: "When we dropped her off, she was alive and apparently quite feisty.
"They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."



Isn't there some danger in releasing them into a foreign eco-system?

img3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-03-17 01:02:20 PM  
She keeps her babies in a rice cake.
 
2014-03-17 01:02:23 PM  
it is only due to a recent increase in banana spiders that I came to believe my neighbor is not, in fact, a serial killer ala Jeffrey Dahmer
 
2014-03-17 01:02:33 PM  
FTA: Colleague Rachel Agnew added to the Evening Standard: "When we dropped her off, she was alive and apparently quite feisty.   They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."

It's not really a good thing for a spider to be "apparently quite feisty."
 
2014-03-17 01:03:03 PM  
www.quickmeme.com
 
2014-03-17 01:03:06 PM  

unfarkingbelievable: Damn, that's a metric buttload of names mommy spider has to think about for her kiddies.


img.fark.net
 
2014-03-17 01:03:34 PM  
i59.tinypic.com

sky spiders
 
2014-03-17 01:04:18 PM  

pyrotek85: [static1.fjcdn.com image 500x368]


Watch out.  That mana bar means she's a caster.
 
2014-03-17 01:04:55 PM  

Muzzleloader: While arachnids, aren't huntsmen a different class of them than spiders?


Are you thinking of harvestmen?

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-17 01:05:47 PM  
Oh, are we do the stupid "lyke omgzzz spiders are sooooo le scary amirite" thing here too? Grow the fark up. Take that shiat back to Reddit.
 
2014-03-17 01:06:10 PM  
Bunch of fargin' pussieeeesZOMGFGOD
 
2014-03-17 01:06:15 PM  
i58.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-17 01:07:17 PM  
Spiders only freak me out, when I walk through one of their webs.  And it's always just one thick anchor thread right at face level.  ARRRRRGHHH
 
2014-03-17 01:07:41 PM  
Sorry, arachnophiles, but I'm using a can of WD40 and a lighter. And maybe a BFG9000.
 
2014-03-17 01:07:55 PM  
i62.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-17 01:09:46 PM  
eviltender.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-17 01:09:50 PM  
I performed an experiment on my daughter.

When she was 5-months old, I got her a set of insect toys for infants. All cute and soft, and made fun noises and/or rattled when you played with them. I made a point of handing her the spider to play with.

One of the first songs she learned was "Itsy-Bitsy Spider," and she still likes to sing it.

Any time we saw a spider, I would look very happy and say, "Look! Itsy-Bitsy Spinder." and then talk to it as if it were very friendly, and tell her how the spider helped us by keeping ants, flies and mosquitos out of the house.

All of that positive reinforcement did nothing. She still developed a typical dislike of spiders as she turned 3.

The theory of genetic memory suggests that people who had a genetic predisposition to be freaked out by arachnids (if such a genetic predisposition could exist) would survive longer and pass their genes on more frequently.

According to that theory, people who don't have a fear of spiders are genetic mutants. What a crappy mutant power to have. "Oh, um...I'm not freaked out by spiders."
 
2014-03-17 01:10:20 PM  

electrik mayhem: Oh, are we do the stupid "lyke omgzzz spiders are sooooo le scary amirite" thing here too? Grow the fark up. Take that shiat back to Reddit.


i2.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-03-17 01:10:45 PM  
static.fjcdn.com

They're such cute little things.
 
2014-03-17 01:11:02 PM  
www.terrazero.com.br
 
2014-03-17 01:11:58 PM  

jst3p: Colleague Rachel Agnew added to the Evening Standard: "When we dropped her off, she was alive and apparently quite feisty.
"They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."


Isn't there some danger in releasing them into a foreign eco-system?

[img3.wikia.nocookie.net image 320x240]


ftfa: Ms Serrat works for the Rainforest Foundation UK charity, who helped her capture the monster arachnid - named Hermione - before London Zoo took over her care.

She's at the zoo, not in the back garden.
 
2014-03-17 01:12:15 PM  
wac.bc6c.edgecastcdn.net
 
2014-03-17 01:14:33 PM  
dl.dropboxusercontent.com
 
2014-03-17 01:14:45 PM  
I love this particular spider image. I was thinking it needed a "name," and when I went searching for this text iteration I noted it was tagged "spiderbro," which works.
img.photobucket.com

I still hate spiders, though, no matter how chill and friendly Spiderbro may be.
 
2014-03-17 01:16:28 PM  

namegoeshere: jst3p: Colleague Rachel Agnew added to the Evening Standard: "When we dropped her off, she was alive and apparently quite feisty.
"They gave her some water and her rather unexpected journey had apparently caused her no harm."


Isn't there some danger in releasing them into a foreign eco-system?

[img3.wikia.nocookie.net image 320x240]

ftfa: Ms Serrat works for the Rainforest Foundation UK charity, who helped her capture the monster arachnid - named Hermione - before London Zoo took over her care.

She's at the zoo, not in the back garden.


Ahh ok, cool. We are reading articles now? What a world!


/thanks
 
2014-03-17 01:17:01 PM  

unfarkingbelievable: Damn, that's a metric buttload of names mommy spider has to think about for her kiddies.


not really, just name them 'B1, B2, B3...'

/the B could be baby, or bastard depending on your mood.
 
2014-03-17 01:17:02 PM  

NutWrench: [dl.dropboxusercontent.com image 400x260]


Broby!!
 
2014-03-17 01:18:15 PM  

patrick767: Came in here for "babies are a joy forever" spider, leaving disappointed.

And leaving you with this:
[img.fark.net image 625x460]


Who drew the cartoon on that spider?
 
2014-03-17 01:19:08 PM  

Katolu: Sorry, arachnophiles, but I'm using a can of WD40 and a lighter. And maybe a BFG9000.


static.fjcdn.com

How can you want to hurt something so adorable?
 
2014-03-17 01:20:10 PM  

Pathman: [www.dvdizzy.com image 640x346]



Fun fact:

The majority of spiders used in the movie were huntsman spiders.
 
2014-03-17 01:20:41 PM  

ciberido: Katolu: Sorry, arachnophiles, but I'm using a can of WD40 and a lighter. And maybe a BFG9000.

[static.fjcdn.com image 460x358]

How can you want to hurt something so adorable?


blogs.westword.com
 
2014-03-17 01:20:47 PM  
I can handle the native species (with the possible exception of the tarantula, which I've seen on trails, but never in or near my home). But if I saw a huge, non-native species like that, it would freak me out -- at least at first.

Case in point: I recently encountered one of these in my kitchen. Freaked me out for a second, then I composed myself, captured it in a jar, took a picture of it so I could have it identified, then killed it with rubbing alcohol to preserve it. The local spider guy at the Cal Academy of Sciences confirmed that's what it was, so I don't have to have any more nightmares about waking up in Australia covered in some kind of snake-eating spiders.
 
2014-03-17 01:21:21 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-17 01:21:56 PM  

Carn: [i62.tinypic.com image 310x293]

This made me laugh way more than it probably should have.


heh.   that's good shiat.  thanks!!
 
2014-03-17 01:22:04 PM  

Anayalator: patrick767: Came in here for "babies are a joy forever" spider, leaving disappointed.

And leaving you with this:
[img.fark.net image 625x460]

Who drew the cartoon on that spider?


God.
 
2014-03-17 01:23:07 PM  
Bestest spider gif evar.

i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-17 01:23:19 PM  

Queensowntalia: I love this particular spider image. I was thinking it needed a "name," and when I went searching for this text iteration I noted it was tagged "spiderbro," which works.
[img.photobucket.com image 354x335]

I still hate spiders, though, no matter how chill and friendly Spiderbro may be.


Spiderbro!
 
2014-03-17 01:24:42 PM  

ciberido: Katolu: Sorry, arachnophiles, but I'm using a can of WD40 and a lighter. And maybe a BFG9000.

[static.fjcdn.com image 460x358]

How can you want to hurt something so adorable?


That depends. Are we inside my house or outside? Outside, I let them be. That's their territory. Inside, they get a taste of my fearsome kung shoe skills.
 
2014-03-17 01:25:08 PM  
Kudos to these people for not killing the spider and letting the zoo care for it. Everybody wins. Even the spider.
 
2014-03-17 01:25:33 PM  

69gnarkill69: Bestest spider gif evar.

[i.imgur.com image 500x360]


I agree!
 
2014-03-17 01:26:41 PM  
400 Babies and no Powerthirst ref yet?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRuNxHqwazs
 
2014-03-17 01:27:18 PM  

Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.


I'm starting to belive more and more that the "nope" folks are just doing it for the Lulz in a kind of group think kind of thing and arn't afraid at all.

just like nope people in Clown threads. for some reason it's "hip" to be afraid of clowns nowadays.
 
2014-03-17 01:28:12 PM  

lostcat: I performed an experiment on my daughter.

When she was 5-months old, I got her a set of insect toys for infants. All cute and soft, and made fun noises and/or rattled when you played with them. I made a point of handing her the spider to play with.

One of the first songs she learned was "Itsy-Bitsy Spider," and she still likes to sing it.

Any time we saw a spider, I would look very happy and say, "Look! Itsy-Bitsy Spinder." and then talk to it as if it were very friendly, and tell her how the spider helped us by keeping ants, flies and mosquitos out of the house.

All of that positive reinforcement did nothing. She still developed a typical dislike of spiders as she turned 3.

The theory of genetic memory suggests that people who had a genetic predisposition to be freaked out by arachnids (if such a genetic predisposition could exist) would survive longer and pass their genes on more frequently.

According to that theory, people who don't have a fear of spiders are genetic mutants. What a crappy mutant power to have. "Oh, um...I'm not freaked out by spiders."


Hah!
My mutant power - that manifests itself as comfort around arachnids - helped me procreate by impressing the hell out of the sire of my children!

Two genetically normal people would be too busy clutching the sheets and peering around a brightly lit environment, scanning for "omg! spider" to reproduce

neener, neener
 
2014-03-17 01:28:31 PM  

mbillips: If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.


Phobias, how do they work?
 
2014-03-17 01:30:50 PM  

Cerebral Knievel: Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.

I'm starting to belive more and more that the "nope" folks are just doing it for the Lulz in a kind of group think kind of thing and arn't afraid at all.

just like nope people in Clown threads. for some reason it's "hip" to be afraid of clowns nowadays.


Sometimes it's more fun to pretend to hate or fear something that doesn't really bother you.  It's somewhat going to see a horror movie and being  pretending to be frightened.  Of course rationally you know it's just special effects (and even if it had been actual real events being recorded, it still wouldn't hurt you), but it's more FUN to pretend it's real and be scared.
 
2014-03-17 01:30:57 PM  

mbillips: Poor little spider looks terrified.

Huntsmen can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively but they are not dangerous to humans.

Grow up, arachnophobes. It's just a little bug. If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.


Little, my ass.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obZwNw20jyQ
 
2014-03-17 01:31:12 PM  

Cerebral Knievel: Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.

I'm starting to belive more and more that the "nope" folks are just doing it for the Lulz in a kind of group think kind of thing and arn't afraid at all.

just like nope people in Clown threads. for some reason it's "hip" to be afraid of clowns nowadays.


stream1.gifsoup.com

Shhhh
 
2014-03-17 01:31:40 PM  
With unhelpful pictures that don't actually demonstrate how giant the spider is.
 
2014-03-17 01:32:42 PM  

mbillips: Poor little spider looks terrified.

Huntsmen can grow to huge sizes and have been known to bite defensively but they are not dangerous to humans.

Grow up, arachnophobes. It's just a little bug. If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.


Nah man fark the spiders. It's called the hunts man spider.
It's us or them.
 
2014-03-17 01:35:09 PM  

The_Sponge: Pathman: [www.dvdizzy.com image 640x346]


Fun fact:

The majority of spiders used in the movie were huntsman spiders.


cool!
there goes 20 minutes down the drain on wikipedia ;-p
 
2014-03-17 01:35:14 PM  

vudukungfu: captured it with a carton box.

Well? Was it a carton or was it a box?
Don't they teach you English at THE University?


Obviously it was the box in which a carton was packed.
 
2014-03-17 01:35:55 PM  
What's really very interesting from a scientific standpoint is how some spiders react to psychoactive drugs.
 
2014-03-17 01:36:36 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-17 01:39:58 PM  
I have a full case of the Heeby-Jeebies going right now.

/Äcklad!
 
2014-03-17 01:45:23 PM  

Cerebral Knievel: Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.

I'm starting to belive more and more that the "nope" folks are just doing it for the Lulz in a kind of group think kind of thing and arn't afraid at all.

just like nope people in Clown threads. for some reason it's "hip" to be afraid of clowns nowadays.


I'm 58 and there were kids, teens and adults who hated/were afraid of clowns my whole life - it's not a new thing.

/not afraid of clowns
//or spiders
 
2014-03-17 01:46:01 PM  

johnny_vegas: mbillips: If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.

Phobias, how do they work?


The appropriate response to fear is courage, not squealing and running like a little girl. I'm not saying you're not actually terrified, I'm just saying you don't have to act on your terror. Suck it up. I had a panic attack once while visiting a cave (forgot I get claustrophobia in caves). I turned pale, sweated, breathed fast and shallow, and went on with the tour. Nobody but my wife knew I was phobic.
 
2014-03-17 01:47:11 PM  
A photo with scale would have been nice...

mediafieldsjournal.squarespace.com
 
2014-03-17 01:47:51 PM  

mbillips: johnny_vegas: mbillips: If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.

Phobias, how do they work?

The appropriate response to fear is courage, not squealing and running like a little girl. I'm not saying you're not actually terrified, I'm just saying you don't have to act on your terror. Suck it up. I had a panic attack once while visiting a cave (forgot I get claustrophobia in caves). I turned pale, sweated, breathed fast and shallow, and went on with the tour. Nobody but my wife knew I was phobic.


Because the intensity of your reaction is the same as everyone's, you sound like an expert in the field.
 
2014-03-17 01:47:51 PM  

ciberido: What's really very interesting from a scientific standpoint is how some spiders react to psychoactive drugs.


LOVE LOVE LOVE Spiders on Drugs : )
 
2014-03-17 01:48:15 PM  

cgraves67: Better to kill it while it's still pregnant than to have thousands of babies already hatched in your luggage.


Because you know what happens when they hatch, right?  At night, after you go to sleep, they CRAWL INSIDE YOUR EAR.
 
2014-03-17 01:48:39 PM  

blatz514: Cerebral Knievel: Uzzah: I'm disappointed in the lack of "nope" .gifs thus far. Apparently, and the arachnophobes are sleeping in today, giving spiders the opportunity to nest in their ear canals.

I'm starting to belive more and more that the "nope" folks are just doing it for the Lulz in a kind of group think kind of thing and arn't afraid at all.

just like nope people in Clown threads. for some reason it's "hip" to be afraid of clowns nowadays.

[stream1.gifsoup.com image 320x240]

Shhhh


Well, the gif worked in the preview.
 
2014-03-17 01:50:51 PM  

parasol: lostcat: I performed an experiment on my daughter.

When she was 5-months old, I got her a set of insect toys for infants. All cute and soft, and made fun noises and/or rattled when you played with them. I made a point of handing her the spider to play with.

One of the first songs she learned was "Itsy-Bitsy Spider," and she still likes to sing it.

Any time we saw a spider, I would look very happy and say, "Look! Itsy-Bitsy Spinder." and then talk to it as if it were very friendly, and tell her how the spider helped us by keeping ants, flies and mosquitos out of the house.

All of that positive reinforcement did nothing. She still developed a typical dislike of spiders as she turned 3.

The theory of genetic memory suggests that people who had a genetic predisposition to be freaked out by arachnids (if such a genetic predisposition could exist) would survive longer and pass their genes on more frequently.

According to that theory, people who don't have a fear of spiders are genetic mutants. What a crappy mutant power to have. "Oh, um...I'm not freaked out by spiders."

Hah!
My mutant power - that manifests itself as comfort around arachnids - helped me procreate by impressing the hell out of the sire of my children!

Two genetically normal people would be too busy clutching the sheets and peering around a brightly lit environment, scanning for "omg! spider" to reproduce

neener, neener


There's a difference between comfort around spiders and being able to smash them. I don't like spiders. I think they are creepy, and I had 2 rats as pets growing up. Even though I don't like spiders, I dislike them in my apartment even more. They are indiscriminately smashed and flushed, along with the house centipedes that were *everywhere* at my old apartment.
 
2014-03-17 01:53:45 PM  
400 babies? That's a whole lot of episodes of Maury.


img.fark.net
 
2014-03-17 01:55:09 PM  

jst3p: 400 babies? That's a whole lot of episodes of Maury.


[img.fark.net image 258x196]


cdn.madamenoire.com
 
2014-03-17 02:02:17 PM  

redmid17: parasol: lostcat:

The theory of genetic memory suggests that people who had a genetic predisposition to be freaked out by arachnids (if such a genetic predisposition could exist) would survive longer and pass their genes on more frequently.

According to that theory, people who don't have a fear of spiders are genetic mutants. What a crappy mutant power to have. "Oh, um...I'm not freaked out by spiders."

Hah!
My mutant power - that manifests itself as comfort around arachnids - helped me procreate by impressing the hell out of the sire of my children!

Two genetically normal people would be too busy clutching the sheets and peering around a brightly lit environment, scanning for "omg! spider" to reproduce

neener, neener

There's a difference between comfort around spiders and being able to smash them. I don't like spiders. I think they are creepy, and I had 2 rats as pets growing up. Even though I don't like spiders, I dislike them in my apartment even more. They are indiscriminately smashed and flushed, along with the house centipedes that were *everywhere* at my old apartment.


I'm creeped out by spiders. I do not like any spiders to be near me, and would flip out if anything bigger than a baby spider was crawling on my skin.

That said, I do not kill spiders I find in my home. I make a point of getting them out of the house, if they are in an area that people frequent, or leaving them alone if they are someplace where they aren't bothering anyone. Of course, the worst we get around here are wolf spiders, so I don't have to deal with anything dangerous or grotesquely large.

House centipedes...Death to them!

I've only encountered one scorpion in the wild, and that was enough to last a lifetime.

Oddly, even though I've been stung/bitten by fire ants (in New Orleans), I don't freak out if an ant is crawling on my skin. I'll remove it, but it doesn't cause my brain to blow a gasket the way a spider would.
 
2014-03-17 02:02:32 PM  
Don't have a phobia of spiders. While hiking around Hillsborough River S.P. I came face to face with what appeared to be an alien face hugger. Didn't squeal like a little girl but, pretty sure I peed a little.
 
2014-03-17 02:03:28 PM  
sphotos-f.ak.fbcdn.net

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-03-17 02:04:30 PM  
I love spiders, but in my home my actions towards spiders are governed by The Arachnid Accords of 2007.

1.  You are not welcome in my home.  If I find you I will capture you and escort you outside.
1a.  Exception:  If I find you in the bathroom I reserve the right to kill you.*
1b.  During winter you will be relocated to the basement.**
2.  Do not move towards me in a manner that is threatening or that may surprise me.  My reflexes may kick in and you will die.
(Example: dropping down from the ceiling right in front of me, coming up over the edge of the table when I am eating).
3.  No egg sacs.  No babies.  Both will be destroyed.
4.  My cats have refused to sign the accords.  If you see a cat you are on your own.

Treaty signed January 1, 2007
* Amended March 2008
* Accord update, agreed upon December 2009, effective only so long as outdoor temperatures average below 40-degrees.
 
2014-03-17 02:06:47 PM  

Mock26: I love spiders, but in my home my actions towards spiders are governed by The Arachnid Accords of 2007.

1.  You are not welcome in my home.  If I find you I will capture you and escort you outside.
1a.  Exception:  If I find you in the bathroom I reserve the right to kill you.*
1b.  During winter you will be relocated to the basement.**
2.  Do not move towards me in a manner that is threatening or that may surprise me.  My reflexes may kick in and you will die.
(Example: dropping down from the ceiling right in front of me, coming up over the edge of the table when I am eating).
3.  No egg sacs.  No babies.  Both will be destroyed.
4.  My cats have refused to sign the accords.  If you see a cat you are on your own.

Treaty signed January 1, 2007
* Amended March 2008
* Accord update, agreed upon December 2009, effective only so long as outdoor temperatures average below 40-degrees.


Addenda:
I. If you're larger than my hand, these Accords are null and void.
II. If you're larger than my face, the situation is referred to Mr. Shovel.
 
2014-03-17 02:09:26 PM  
The human fear of spiders is instinctive, its a pretty remarkable piece of evolution. We are born fearing that group of animals because of their possibly deadly venom. Same reason many humans are afraid of snakes.
 
2014-03-17 02:11:02 PM  
You know what are really scary?

Spider Clowns.
 
2014-03-17 02:12:18 PM  

Sajuuk Khar: The human fear of spiders is instinctive, its a pretty remarkable piece of evolution. We are born fearing that group of animals because of their possibly deadly venom. Same reason many humans are afraid of snakes.


Giant, hairy spiders give me the willies.  Even though I rationally know they're harmless and aren't going to attack me, the part of my brain that's still on the African savannah refuses to listen.

The little jumping spiders posted in this thread are kinda adorable, though.
 
2014-03-17 02:12:50 PM  
Cool Arachnid Story Time:  One year when I was working at a Boy Scout summer camp near Warren, PA, I was sitting at a picnic table when I noticed a really tiny spider crawling on one of my arm hairs.  He was so tiny that the hair did not even bend under his weight.  When he got to the end of the hair, he attached a line, and dropped down to another hair, and then started to walk from hair to hair until he found himself again at the top of one that was sticking up.  And once there he again rigged a safety line and descended down.  Sadly at that point some scouts showed up in my area and I had to (gently) remove the spider from my arm to a nearby bush.
 
2014-03-17 02:20:33 PM  

Bondith: Giant, hairy spiders give me the willies. Even though I rationally know they're harmless and aren't going to attack me, the part of my brain that's still on the African savannah refuses to listen.


Yes.
 
2014-03-17 02:24:15 PM  

R.O.U.S: Powerth


Came to say this.
 
2014-03-17 02:25:54 PM  

Nytfall: R.O.U.S: Powerth

Came to say this.


Quote fail.  My bad.  Buy Powerthirst anyway
 
2014-03-17 02:26:59 PM  

pxlboy: Bondith: Giant, hairy spiders give me the willies. Even though I rationally know they're harmless and aren't going to attack me, the part of my brain that's still on the African savannah refuses to listen.

Yes.


That's exactly it. I try very hard to leave them alone (I know they eat things I don't like and are therefore useful) but I can't help being creeped right out. So while I can shower with them waaaaay up in the corner (not comfortably, being nekkid like I am in the shower. I can't not watch them the entire time) if they come at me (move in my general direction) they're going down the drain. I don't want to do this, but it needs to happen if I'm ever getting the shampoo out of my hair.
 
2014-03-17 02:34:45 PM  

Mock26: Cool Arachnid Story Time:  One year when I was working at a Boy Scout summer camp near Warren, PA, I was sitting at a picnic table when I noticed a really tiny spider crawling on one of my arm hairs.  He was so tiny that the hair did not even bend under his weight.  When he got to the end of the hair, he attached a line, and dropped down to another hair, and then started to walk from hair to hair until he found himself again at the top of one that was sticking up.  And once there he again rigged a safety line and descended down.  Sadly at that point some scouts showed up in my area and I had to (gently) remove the spider from my arm to a nearby bush.


Cool!
 
2014-03-17 02:35:34 PM  

mbillips: johnny_vegas: mbillips: If you're actually phobic, recognize that this is YOUR failing, and don't indulge it.

Phobias, how do they work?

The appropriate response to fear is courage, not squealing and running like a little girl.


Why?  Why do you think it "inappropriate" to express one's feelings?  Why is it better to pretend to not feel fear, and essentially lie?  Are emotions so terrible?
 
2014-03-17 02:37:42 PM  

real_headhoncho: You know what are really scary?

Spider Clowns.


th08.deviantart.net

You asked for it.
 
2014-03-17 02:39:07 PM  

Sajuuk Khar: The human fear of spiders is instinctive, its a pretty remarkable piece of evolution. We are born fearing that group of animals because of their possibly deadly venom. Same reason many humans are afraid of snakes.


Snakes dont really bother me, infact I have been known to make a buck off of catching and selling venomous snakes to people dumb enough to want them. And I get like screaming like a girl jumping up on a chair afraid of spiders.
 
2014-03-17 02:39:49 PM  

ciberido: real_headhoncho: You know what are really scary?

Spider Clowns.



You asked for it.


I now know what hell looks like.
 
2014-03-17 02:50:38 PM  
Fortunately no humongous spiders come in my place.  My cats, however, love spiders and will even make a certain noise if they see one.  After I check it out to make sure it's not poisonous, the spider version of the Running Man begins.  I don't know if any have ever made it out alive, but if they have then God bless 'em.
 
2014-03-17 02:50:53 PM  
Immigration really needs to do something about this. Clearly she's trying to raise anchor babies.
 
2014-03-17 02:52:00 PM  
i.imgur.com

No mention at all that Huntsmen spiders are literally... LITERALLY... harmless to humans, scared of us, and keep other insects away from us?

No?

Okay.

So we will hunt them.
Because they can take it.
 
2014-03-17 02:56:42 PM  

jst3p: jst3p: 400 babies? That's a whole lot of episodes of Maury.


[img.fark.net image 258x196]

[cdn.madamenoire.com image 425x323]


The baby on the screen in the background is the best part.
 
2014-03-17 03:42:25 PM  
img.fark.net
/needs more love
 
2014-03-17 03:47:31 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: ciberido: Katolu: Sorry, arachnophiles, but I'm using a can of WD40 and a lighter. And maybe a BFG9000.

[static.fjcdn.com image 460x358]

How can you want to hurt something so adorable?

That depends. Are we inside my house or outside? Outside, I let them be. That's their territory. Inside, they get a taste of my fearsome kung shoe skills.


I call that Spider Law. If all the spiders I have found in my house were like "song of my people" spider, I'm ok with that. I like music.

But if I saw a huntsman in the corner of my bedroom, all bets are off. Lighter and Aquanet hairspray all the way.

I give outdoor spiders lots of leeway.

/nope.gif
 
2014-03-17 03:56:09 PM  

Mock26: I love spiders, but in my home my actions towards spiders are governed by The Arachnid Accords of 2007.

1.  You are not welcome in my home.  If I find you I will capture you and escort you outside.
1a.  Exception:  If I find you in the bathroom I reserve the right to kill you.*
1b.  During winter you will be relocated to the basement.**
2.  Do not move towards me in a manner that is threatening or that may surprise me.  My reflexes may kick in and you will die.
(Example: dropping down from the ceiling right in front of me, coming up over the edge of the table when I am eating).
3.  No egg sacs.  No babies.  Both will be destroyed.
4.  My cats have refused to sign the accords.  If you see a cat you are on your own.

Treaty signed January 1, 2007
* Amended March 2008
* Accord update, agreed upon December 2009, effective only so long as outdoor temperatures average below 40-degrees.


I am going to amend this for my own purposes. Tyvm.

/how did clowns get into this thread??
//clowns are disturbing
 
2014-03-17 04:02:23 PM  

sovietski: Mock26: I love spiders, but in my home my actions towards spiders are governed by The Arachnid Accords of 2007.

1.  You are not welcome in my home.  If I find you I will capture you and escort you outside.
1a.  Exception:  If I find you in the bathroom I reserve the right to kill you.*
1b.  During winter you will be relocated to the basement.**
2.  Do not move towards me in a manner that is threatening or that may surprise me.  My reflexes may kick in and you will die.
(Example: dropping down from the ceiling right in front of me, coming up over the edge of the table when I am eating).
3.  No egg sacs.  No babies.  Both will be destroyed.
4.  My cats have refused to sign the accords.  If you see a cat you are on your own.

Treaty signed January 1, 2007
* Amended March 2008
* Accord update, agreed upon December 2009, effective only so long as outdoor temperatures average below 40-degrees.

I am going to amend this for my own purposes. Tyvm.

/how did clowns get into this thread??
//clowns are disturbing


a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com

Sweet dreams.
 
2014-03-17 04:06:28 PM  

real_headhoncho: You know what are really scary?

Spider Clowns.


You're in luck! They actually exist.

img.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-17 04:10:58 PM  
Don't kill spiders. They eat bugs.

I generally leave spiders alone. Unless I find them in my bedroom (which i almost never do), in which case i escort them outside (if it's not too cold out).
 
2014-03-17 04:20:40 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-17 04:23:27 PM  
What's all this about farkfarkfark, then?
 
2014-03-17 04:25:07 PM  
What's up, Chief?

i1.ytimg.com

http://youtu.be/EIMHEZOiOMo

/120 posts and I'm the first to make the reference?
//Cripes, you guys are slipping.
 
2014-03-17 04:30:14 PM  
i60.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-17 04:32:00 PM  
 
2014-03-17 04:44:39 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-17 04:51:43 PM  

weltallica: No mention at all that Huntsmen spiders are literally... LITERALLY... harmless to humans,


They have fangs, right?  And are venomous?

I'm thinking fangs + venom + biting could be a little ... disconcerting
 
2014-03-17 04:53:03 PM  
thezenofdave.com
/HEY GUIES WUTS GOING ON IN DIS THREAD?!?
 
2014-03-17 05:00:30 PM  
There is nothing in the pictures to indicate scale so... big?  Yeah when you zoom in macro 1000x
 
2014-03-17 05:19:58 PM  
They named the spider Hermione.

WTF, they went with a Harry Potter name and it's not Aragog?
 
2014-03-17 05:34:09 PM  

Raptavio: They named the spider Hermione.

WTF, they went with a Harry Potter name and it's not Aragog?


It's a girl, so Shelob.
 
2014-03-17 05:48:08 PM  

Two16: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 658x438]


img.qwled.com
 
2014-03-17 05:49:40 PM  

namegoeshere: Raptavio: They named the spider Hermione.

WTF, they went with a Harry Potter name and it's not Aragog?

It's a girl, so Shelob.


The name "Ungoliant" would also work, as she was Shelob's great-(xN)-grandmother
 
2014-03-17 06:06:58 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-17 06:46:58 PM  
Once the eggs are laid, the spider is no longer pregnant.  She's just carrying around a sack of babies.
 
2014-03-17 07:17:04 PM  

ReverendJasen: Once the eggs are laid, the spider is no longer pregnant.  She's just carrying around a sack of babies.


Oh, okay. That's much better, thanks.

*shudder*
 
2014-03-17 07:28:06 PM  
Want to have some fun?  Go outside at night when it's dry (no dew/water on the grass), and take a flashlight, hold it at eye level, and look around your yard.  You'll likely see dozens of beautiful tiny sparkles of light.  I'll bet you can guess what the sparkles are.

Sleep tight folks.
 
2014-03-17 07:37:04 PM  
cgremlin:   I'll bet you can guess what the sparkles are.

god crying?
 
2014-03-17 08:30:07 PM  

minnkat: [i.imgur.com image 607x325]



Awwwwwww.
 
2014-03-17 08:59:58 PM  
Was staying with some friends in Australia when, one day, a critter like this one:

4.bp.blogspot.com

appeared at the top of the dining room curtains.

Not wanting to squash the spider into her clean, lacy curtains, my hostess thought she'd try suffocating it with hairspray so it would drop to the floor on its own. She sprayed... and she sprayed... and sprayed... and still the spider clung to the curtains. Her bemused husband watched for a while before remarking, "Aw, Hitler was kinder!" and whacking the spider hard enough with a broom so it would let go.

/no idea how long the spider survived outdoors after that
// the other huntsman spiders used to come out of their hidey-holes after a rain and wave their front legs at you if you walked or drove nearby
 
2014-03-17 10:58:36 PM  

Lydia_C: Was staying with some friends in Australia when, one day, a critter like this one:

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]

appeared at the top of the dining room curtains.

Not wanting to squash the spider into her clean, lacy curtains, my hostess thought she'd try suffocating it with hairspray so it would drop to the floor on its own. She sprayed... and she sprayed... and sprayed... and still the spider clung to the curtains. Her bemused husband watched for a while before remarking, "Aw, Hitler was kinder!" and whacking the spider hard enough with a broom so it would let go.

/no idea how long the spider survived outdoors after that
// the other huntsman spiders used to come out of their hidey-holes after a rain and wave their front legs at you if you walked or drove nearby


Aww, that's a little one.

My aunt frosticled a huge one with bug spray and finally finished it off with a thong.  Cleanup required a hose and a shovel.

I'd be tempted to flush them, but I doubt they'd fit down the pipe, and I wouldn't be surprised if you told me they could swim.  For weeks afterwards I'd be living in fear of a huge bloody spider with SCUBA gear and a grudge.
 
2014-03-17 11:46:46 PM  
I tend to like having a big huntsman in the house. Each day you get to wonder where it has moved to and am impressed by the length of its travels.  They are harmless and keep little bugs out of the house (also smaller less friendly spiders.)

Mind you I have only rarely had the balls to pick them up (mostly when there is someone I wish to impress around) and yet I have mates you go straight up to them and pick them up and let them play around on their arms.  I not quite at their level of excellence but I would like to be.

Oh and the one in the corner above the shower tends to make me want to turn around and face it whilst showering.
 
2014-03-17 11:51:50 PM  

namegoeshere: Raptavio: They named the spider Hermione.

WTF, they went with a Harry Potter name and it's not Aragog?

It's a girl, so Shelob.


Lord of the Rings != Harry Potter, ass-hal!
 
2014-03-18 03:50:48 AM  

lostcat: I performed an experiment on my daughter.

When she was 5-months old, I got her a set of insect toys for infants. All cute and soft, and made fun noises and/or rattled when you played with them. I made a point of handing her the spider to play with.

One of the first songs she learned was "Itsy-Bitsy Spider," and she still likes to sing it.

Any time we saw a spider, I would look very happy and say, "Look! Itsy-Bitsy Spinder." and then talk to it as if it were very friendly, and tell her how the spider helped us by keeping ants, flies and mosquitos out of the house.

All of that positive reinforcement did nothing. She still developed a typical dislike of spiders as she turned 3.

The theory of genetic memory suggests that people who had a genetic predisposition to be freaked out by arachnids (if such a genetic predisposition could exist) would survive longer and pass their genes on more frequently.

According to that theory, people who don't have a fear of spiders are genetic mutants. What a crappy mutant power to have. "Oh, um...I'm not freaked out by spiders."


My parents never reacted positively or negatively to insects and arachnids. I was just always taught to steer clear of brown spiders with fiddle shapes on their backs or black spiders with red hour glass shapes on them. I was never taught to be scared of spiders. I'd imagine fear reactions are pretty varied. In fact, my father has always been terrified of snakes. Guess what kind of animal I had for a pet from the age of 14 to the age of 28?
 
2014-03-18 07:10:16 AM  
We have brown huntsmen (and, I assume, huntswomen) here in the Philippines. They're not really that big: maybe 3 to 4 inches across including their legs, at least I've never seen any bigger ones. They're about as venemous as wasps, is all, and they'd rather run away than bite. They're quite fast, too: that's how they catch their prey, by running them down. They're actually kind of cool.
 
2014-03-18 07:10:27 AM  

Raptavio: namegoeshere: Raptavio: They named the spider Hermione.

WTF, they went with a Harry Potter name and it's not Aragog?

It's a girl, so Shelob.

Lord of the Rings != Harry Potter, ass-hal!


Thank you Captain Obvious for clearing that up.
 
2014-03-18 09:25:15 AM  

minnkat: [i.imgur.com image 607x325]


That is just awesome! :-D
 
2014-03-18 01:41:17 PM  
While we are talking about Arthropods...  how about a little love for the biggest one on the planet? The Japanese Spider Crab, that is, this guy:

upload.wikimedia.org
Can be 3.8 metres (12 ft) from claw to claw. The body may grow to a size of 40 cm or 16 in.

Here is a small one:

metrouk2.files.wordpress.com
 
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