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(Slate)   We interrupt the coverage of the civil unrest in the Ukraine and the search for the missing Malaysia airliner to bring you this important message: SHOULD HARRY POTTER FANS READ JK ROWLING'S NEW STORY ON THE HISTORY OF QUIDDITCH?   (slate.com) divider line 37
    More: Fail, J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter, Harry Potter fans, Malaysia, Ukraine, civil unrest, Goblet of Fire  
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2434 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Mar 2014 at 11:22 AM (22 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-16 08:55:15 AM
I thought she already wrote that one?

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-03-16 09:58:37 AM
So Subby is saying that nobody should be discussing anything other than the Ukraine and the missing plane?
 
2014-03-16 11:28:31 AM

Dinki: So Subby is saying that nobody should be discussing anything other than the Ukraine and the missing plane?


Apparently. I'm going to hop into my way back machine so that I can earnestlt talk about SALT II, divestment in South Africa, and saving whales, the stuff serious people used to use to suck all the life out of the room by droning about.
 
2014-03-16 11:30:43 AM
No
 
2014-03-16 11:32:24 AM
What's being interrupted again?  It's Slate's Culture Blog.  I won't expect hard-hitting international news stories in the Fashion section of my local paper either.

Oh and fark you for making me defend Slate.
 
2014-03-16 11:33:24 AM

SecretAgentWoman: I thought she already wrote that one?

[upload.wikimedia.org image 200x291]


Shh.  It's called "double-dipping".
 
2014-03-16 11:40:28 AM

Dinki: So Subby is saying that nobody should be discussing anything other than the Ukraine and the missing plane?


I know I normally turn to Slate for all of my world politics information.
 
2014-03-16 11:44:43 AM
No.
 
2014-03-16 11:48:36 AM
Did anyone yet mention how hard Subby fails for that stupid headline? Yes? OK, then.
 
2014-03-16 11:49:11 AM
How can Rowling still need more money?

I don't care if she can only enjoy cocaine served in the skull of a freshly killed member of the House of Lords while Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney monkey-knife-fight, I think she's still doing ok.
 
2014-03-16 11:56:21 AM
Eh. Some fanfiction writer has already done it better and several thousand have already done it worse. I'll pass.
 
2014-03-16 12:00:20 PM
She can't figure out something fun to do with her billion dollars.
 
2014-03-16 12:02:57 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: How can Rowling still need more money?

I don't care if she can only enjoy cocaine served in the skull of a freshly killed member of the House of Lords while Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney monkey-knife-fight, I think she's still doing ok.


Meh, she's probably just bored.
 
2014-03-16 12:03:01 PM
Who boot neigh.
 
2014-03-16 12:07:38 PM
I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.
 
2014-03-16 12:21:29 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: How can Rowling still need more money?

I don't care if she can only enjoy cocaine served in the skull of a freshly killed member of the House of Lords while Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney monkey-knife-fight, I think she's still doing ok.



Thanks for giving away the secret of how the golden snitch came to be.
 
2014-03-16 12:26:46 PM
No, but I'd love to read a book about the writing of that particular book.
 
2014-03-16 12:49:17 PM
Screw you twice, subby. Once for that incredibly insipid headline, and another for making me log in just to say so.

There are plenty of examples of major news networks covering minutiae in the face of breaking news, but pointing out one the Lifestyle section Slate is so failpants it's sort of amazing.
 
2014-03-16 12:57:24 PM
Did they find Balloon Boy yet?
 
2014-03-16 01:05:30 PM

Ishkur: I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.


12 man squamish?
 
2014-03-16 01:17:32 PM
Depends. Does it contain something unexpected that sorts out a problem I'm having?
 
2014-03-16 01:28:00 PM
Sorry, I'm reading 'The History of Squid-biatch', with pictures......lots of pictures.
 
2014-03-16 01:37:58 PM

Arkanaut: Mr. Coffee Nerves: How can Rowling still need more money?

I don't care if she can only enjoy cocaine served in the skull of a freshly killed member of the House of Lords while Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney monkey-knife-fight, I think she's still doing ok.

Meh, she's probably just bored.


As a rule, writers LIKE to write, it's kinda what they do.  And of course she keeps trying to make money too, few of us will turn down a chance to be paid for what we are going to do anyway.
 
2014-03-16 01:44:23 PM

Fano: Ishkur: I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.

12 man squamish?


I was having a discussion with a friend about whether or not Quidditch is a terrible sport.  On the one hand, its quaffles and bludgers and other nonsense is just as (un)interesting as any other brand of "move the thing to the other thing and get the score!" sport.  But a problem arises with the snitch.

Now sure, chasing and catching something is a sport, hell they have like 50 of those kinds of games at a rodeo, but the unpredictability of whether it will be caught in the first 20 seconds of the game or 3 hours after everyone has gotten bored means the game can really suck to watch.  Moreover since it scores SO many points, and tends to happen pretty fast, you end up with it being the only part of the game that matters, unless one team is completely DOMINATING the other.

But on the other hand, boxing goes until one man falls, and that can be quite random as well.
 
2014-03-16 01:47:05 PM
Likely it's the publisher pressuring her to produce more content.
 
2014-03-16 02:22:29 PM
This just in... the Crimean people flanked by russian soldiers and armored vehicles.. have largely voted to join Russia.

Who knew?
 
2014-03-16 02:24:28 PM
I for one would buy it if it listed the historical professional teams like the Chudley Cannons, and probably dabbled in discussion of uniform design.
 
2014-03-16 02:30:20 PM

rjakobi: I for one would buy it if it listed the historical professional teams like the Chudley Cannons, and probably dabbled in discussion of uniform design.


I would get one, but I spent all my money on having a star named after me, in book form, at the Copywrite office.
 
2014-03-16 03:05:13 PM

TheBigJerk: Fano: Ishkur: I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.

12 man squamish?

I was having a discussion with a friend about whether or not Quidditch is a terrible sport.  On the one hand, its quaffles and bludgers and other nonsense is just as (un)interesting as any other brand of "move the thing to the other thing and get the score!" sport.  But a problem arises with the snitch.

Now sure, chasing and catching something is a sport, hell they have like 50 of those kinds of games at a rodeo, but the unpredictability of whether it will be caught in the first 20 seconds of the game or 3 hours after everyone has gotten bored means the game can really suck to watch.  Moreover since it scores SO many points, and tends to happen pretty fast, you end up with it being the only part of the game that matters, unless one team is completely DOMINATING the other.

But on the other hand, boxing goes until one man falls, and that can be quite random as well.


The golden snitch seems relatively TOO easy to catch. By comparison it should, as a game ender be more like that hoop in Aztec football where you had to hurl a stone ball 50 feet up through it. You'd have to be desperate to start actively doing for it.
 
2014-03-16 03:07:16 PM
Granted, we mostly saw jr high and high school quidditch being played, so the talent level would be more even as it usually is with amateurs and one big play deciding stuff more often if it's available. presumably, (not a big potter reader) in the major leagues the teams can more easily prevent the other team from getting the snitch.
 
2014-03-16 03:08:45 PM
*like how a skilled little leaguer can "swing for the fences" everytime and rack up an impressive home run total when that crap would get you on your ass in major league baseball
 
2014-03-16 04:16:33 PM
So she IS going to try to become an unintelligent version of Tolkien?
 
2014-03-16 04:28:39 PM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: How can Rowling still need more money?

I don't care if she can only enjoy cocaine served in the skull of a freshly killed member of the House of Lords while Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney monkey-knife-fight, I think she's still doing ok.


This is what happens when a person is doing something they like to do for a living. Even though they made enough money that they don't need to do it anymore, they continue to do it because they like it.
 
2014-03-16 05:16:39 PM

TheBigJerk: I was having a discussion with a friend about whether or not Quidditch is a terrible sport. On the one hand, its quaffles and bludgers and other nonsense is just as (un)interesting as any other brand of "move the thing to the other thing and get the score!" sport. But a problem arises with the snitch.

Now sure, chasing and catching something is a sport, hell they have like 50 of those kinds of games at a rodeo, but the unpredictability of whether it will be caught in the first 20 seconds of the game or 3 hours after everyone has gotten bored means the game can really suck to watch. Moreover since it scores SO many points, and tends to happen pretty fast, you end up with it being the only part of the game that matters, unless one team is completely DOMINATING the other.



The problem is that catching the snitch is a complete side contest that has absolutely NOTHING to do with the actual game, and in most instances can even invalidate everything that's going on. It is so illogical and stupid that no other sport is constructed in such a manner.

It would be like a football game where, in addition to the stuff going on the field, there is also a chess match between representatives of each team on the sidelines. The chess match replaces the gameclock (so the game could conceivably go on forever if one of the chess players stalls or obstructs in any way), and the winner of the chess match gets 35 points and ends the game.

It's the most ridiculous sport I've ever heard, and the fact that people are actually constructing leads and playing it at Universities shows that people are either brain-dead idiots or complete farking retards.
 
2014-03-16 07:15:37 PM

TheBigJerk: Fano: Ishkur: I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.

12 man squamish?

I was having a discussion with a friend about whether or not Quidditch is a terrible sport.  On the one hand, its quaffles and bludgers and other nonsense is just as (un)interesting as any other brand of "move the thing to the other thing and get the score!" sport.  But a problem arises with the snitch.

Now sure, chasing and catching something is a sport, hell they have like 50 of those kinds of games at a rodeo, but the unpredictability of whether it will be caught in the first 20 seconds of the game or 3 hours after everyone has gotten bored means the game can really suck to watch.  Moreover since it scores SO many points, and tends to happen pretty fast, you end up with it being the only part of the game that matters, unless one team is completely DOMINATING the other.

But on the other hand, boxing goes until one man falls, and that can be quite random as well.


TheBigJerk: Fano: Ishkur: I remember creating a fake sport once, complete with fake teams, fake star players with fake stats and a fake history with dynasties and one year wonders all that interesting stuff.

I was 12.

12 man squamish?

I was having a discussion with a friend about whether or not Quidditch is a terrible sport.  On the one hand, its quaffles and bludgers and other nonsense is just as (un)interesting as any other brand of "move the thing to the other thing and get the score!" sport.  But a problem arises with the snitch.

Now sure, chasing and catching something is a sport, hell they have like 50 of those kinds of games at a rodeo, but the unpredictability of whether it will be caught in the first 20 seconds of the game or 3 hours after everyone has gotten bored means the game can really suck to watch.  Moreover since it scores SO many points, and tends to happen pretty fast, you end up with it being the only part of the game that matters, unless one team is completely DOMINATING the other.

But on the other hand, boxing goes until one man falls, and that can be quite random as well.


J.K. Rowling and everyone in her novels is very much British - the home of long, tedious sports such as cricket.

Then there's the traditional "sport" of fox hunting, which could be over in a few minutes, or go on all day. We're talking about a thousand-year-old culture that's an island nation, which tends to make the inhabitants a little "weird".


See also: Japan.
 
2014-03-16 07:27:49 PM
How is it a fail to have more than two news stories?

Nobody has any concrete new information about the missing flight, and obsessing over it is a waste of time.  As for Crimea, 99% of Americans would have failed to locate it on a map, and likely would never have even heard of it, before this situation.  The only reason anyone cares is because Americans have an innate dislike of Russia, and enjoy excuses to hate on them.
 
2014-03-16 07:35:07 PM

Pattuq: How is it a fail to have more than two news stories?

Nobody has any concrete new information about the missing flight, and obsessing over it is a waste of time.  As for Crimea, 99% of Americans would have failed to locate it on a map, and likely would never have even heard of it, before this situation.  The only reason anyone cares is because Americans have an innate dislike of Russia, and enjoy excuses to hate on them.


99% is being generous.
 
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