If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(PBS)   So the guys actually in charge of maintaining and operating America's nuclear missile forces apparently REALLY suck at their jobs, but the cooks in their mess halls? Truly top-notch. So overall? Give the base a "C"   (pbs.org) divider line 28
    More: Asinine, Minot, facility management, U.S. Strategic Command, Malmstrom Air Force Base, personnel, missiles, McKeon, Vandenberg Air Force Base  
•       •       •

4437 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Mar 2014 at 12:31 PM (40 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-14 11:43:44 AM  
On the one hand these are officers of the United States Military and are being entrusted with incredibly powerful weapons of mass destruction. On the other hand they're manning a mostly irrelevant part of an antiquated weapons system that there's only a dubious need to even have in the modern world.
 
2014-03-14 12:35:08 PM  
Now that right there IS THE Dead End Job.

Maybe we could get illegals to do it.
 
2014-03-14 12:36:09 PM  
Should we be upset that the people who would be responsible for starting the nuclear apocalypse would be bad at it?

I mean, if it's "LOL how do I launched missiles?" bad, that's cool. But if it's "oops" bad, we need to have a talk.
 
2014-03-14 12:39:22 PM  
The inspection they're talking about is most likely a readiness or effectiveness inspection which takes the whole base into account. You'll get grouped into the civil engineering, communications, dining facility, security forces, public affairs, everything. Just because they get a 'satisfactory' grade doesn't mean the failed areas aren't getting hit really hard. It's almost certainly a 'commander's interest item' and will be scrutinized more than anything else. Now step 2....fix the problem with the entire nuclear program.
 
2014-03-14 12:45:41 PM  
You have to understand the training involved in making them top notch.

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-14 12:47:49 PM  

sendtodave: You have to understand the training involved in making them top notch.

[img.fark.net image 248x203]


There it is.
 
2014-03-14 12:52:58 PM  
Well, it's the easiest exam to be an officer.  Even a complete smeghead could pass it.
 
2014-03-14 12:53:56 PM  

sendtodave: You have to understand the training involved in making them top notch.


Done in five
 
2014-03-14 12:57:16 PM  
50-plus years of nothing but drills and proficiency tests. That's got to be the most boring job in the world. We should at the least let them fire off a round every now and then.
 
2014-03-14 12:58:17 PM  
milowitz: The inspection they're talking about is most likely a readiness or effectiveness inspection which takes the whole base into account. You'll get grouped into the civil engineering, communications, dining facility, security forces, public affairs, everything. Just because they get a 'satisfactory' grade doesn't mean the failed areas aren't getting hit really hard. It's almost certainly a 'new commander's interest item' and will be scrutinized more than anything else. Now step 2....fix the problem with the entire nuclear program.

FTFY
 
2014-03-14 01:02:42 PM  
mash4077.podbean.com
 
2014-03-14 01:13:24 PM  
Well fed people are less cranky, so there's that...

Shut that shiat down now. Corruption, incompetence, out-of-date procedures and systems? We're talking nuclear weapons. Shut it down and start over.
 
2014-03-14 01:24:41 PM  
Well an army moves on its stomach.
 
2014-03-14 01:33:45 PM  
Leaving The Language of Men, by Norman Mailer.

/high school sophomore English
 
2014-03-14 01:43:20 PM  

milowitz: The inspection they're talking about is most likely a readiness or effectiveness inspection which takes the whole base into account. You'll get grouped into the civil engineering, communications, dining facility, security forces, public affairs, everything. Just because they get a 'satisfactory' grade doesn't mean the failed areas aren't getting hit really hard. It's almost certainly a 'commander's interest item' and will be scrutinized more than anything else. Now step 2....fix the problem with the entire nuclear program.


Yep.  This sounds like a Wing Inspection conducted by the parent Air Force Major Command, which would be the Air Force Global Strike Command (which consolidated the nuclear strike missions of Air Force Space Command and Air Combat Command)
 .
U.S. Strategic Command (which oversees all nukes in the inventory, from Navy ballistic subs, to ICBMs, to nuclear bombers) would conduct its own Nuclear Surety Inspection.
 
2014-03-14 01:43:27 PM  

jtown: [mash4077.podbean.com image 600x448]


One of the most heart breaking episodes.
 
2014-03-14 02:03:12 PM  

Mindlock: Now step 2....fix the problem with the entire nuclear program.


Call your Congresscritter.
 
2014-03-14 02:09:58 PM  
I'm more concerned that, if we ever used those weapons, these are some of the sure-thing survivors. They aren't even competent at their job, and they will help rebuild the world?
 
2014-03-14 03:47:54 PM  

lindalouwho: Well fed people are less cranky, so there's that...

Shut that shiat down now. Corruption, incompetence, out-of-date procedures and systems? We're talking nuclear weapons. Shut it down and start over.


Relax, Francis, they have.
Makes this theater all the more depressing.
 
2014-03-14 03:58:42 PM  

snocone: lindalouwho: Well fed people are less cranky, so there's that...

Shut that shiat down now. Corruption, incompetence, out-of-date procedures and systems? We're talking nuclear weapons. Shut it down and start over.

Relax, Francis, they have.
Makes this theater all the more depressing.


That would be Frances ;-)

Should've gone with the cooking angle. Have friends in Ukraine, anything military is making me nervous right now.
 
2014-03-14 04:19:06 PM  
Are the launch codes still set to 0000? So how hard could it be?
 
2014-03-14 04:19:22 PM  

sendtodave: You have to understand the training involved in making them top notch.


Came for this.

Was he ever that young?


/enjoyed that movie.
 
2014-03-14 04:50:52 PM  
This test cheating is rampant throughout the gov. It doesn't mean the cheaters are incapable of doing their jobs. It means it is the equivalent of a history test asking what time of day a battle took place, instead of who won, what the battle was fought over, and what the geopolitical effects were, etc.

I could be wrong in this case as I lack direct knowledge, but that is my experience.
 
2014-03-14 05:20:26 PM  

lepton68: Are the launch codes still set to 0000? So how hard could it be?


Does the Air Force work anything like Corporate America? I can't imagine how some go-getting Colonel wouldn't look at that and say, "0000? We must change this to 1234!" and ride that piece of brilliance to a promotion. And the next year, his replacement would say "1234? We must change this to 0000!"
Of course, the reason that sort of thing works in CA is that the codes would never actually change. They would just remain 0000 while all the cube monkeys sulked and griped about how much the managers make. In the Air Force, maybe people follow orders, and the codes would change, and that's why everyone is confused and can't do his job. Maybe if people quit doing what they were told, that would solve their performance problems.
 
2014-03-14 07:38:46 PM  

lepton68: Are the launch codes still set to 0000? So how hard could it be?


Hey now, they used an 8-digit PAL code. The Air Force would never use something so insecure as a 4 digit code.
 
2014-03-14 08:02:01 PM  
So I went down to the cafeteria and told them I wanted 'scattered, smothered and and covered' and this green Launch button lit up...
 
2014-03-15 10:43:05 AM  
www.quickmeme.com
 
2014-03-15 11:25:26 AM  
Am I the only one here not surprised at all that our multi Billion Dollar Altar to the End of Days is secured by a 4 digit code that is the first try by any 4 year old hack?
That truly is Military Grade Stupid.

/only one place to find Stupid that concentrated
 
Displayed 28 of 28 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report