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(SFGate)   That man who woke up in the body bag? Yea he's dead now. Probably   (sfgate.com) divider line 38
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4406 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2014 at 5:07 PM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-13 04:39:13 PM
Woke up
Fell out of the bag
Dragged a comb
Across my head...
 
2014-03-13 04:44:29 PM
Man, that mortician will just not give up once he wants someone dead.
 
2014-03-13 05:05:32 PM
This is what happens when you don't follow Rule #2.
 
2014-03-13 05:11:02 PM

scottydoesntknow: This is what happens when you don't follow Rule #2.


He talked about fight club?
 
2014-03-13 05:11:49 PM
img.fark.net

MISSED ME TWICE!
 
2014-03-13 05:12:05 PM
"Howard, the coroner, called it a miracle at the time."

Huh, imagine that.  I think the conversation with the coroner probably went like this:

"Dr. Howard, are you incompetent?"
"No, it was a miracle!"
 
2014-03-13 05:13:09 PM
That poor family. Again.
 
2014-03-13 05:13:30 PM
Back on the cart!

/no, you aren't going for a walk
 
2014-03-13 05:14:32 PM

mreusone: "Howard, the coroner, called it a miracle at the time."

Huh, imagine that.  I think the conversation with the coroner probably went like this:

"Dr. Howard, are you incompetent?"
"No, it was a miracle!"


I bet he was very, very thorough this time.
 
2014-03-13 05:15:11 PM

madgonad: Back on the cart!

/no, you aren't going for a walk


But what if he feels happy or like going for a walk?
 
2014-03-13 05:15:35 PM
I assume that said Coroner has his license revoked immediately
 
2014-03-13 05:16:00 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-13 05:16:24 PM
Ignoring the link to the story from a website thousands of miles away, there is a gem of a quote on the local news about it from his nephew.

"I think he's gone this time."
 
2014-03-13 05:19:09 PM
Subtard: Yea rhymes with hay, down by the may, I just may
 
2014-03-13 05:21:43 PM
That must be screwed up for the family having to deal with it twice. The coroner is probably sweating balls.
 
2014-03-13 05:22:18 PM
Apatheist: That poor family. Again.

why do you care?
 
2014-03-13 05:23:29 PM

madgonad: Back on the cart!

/no, you aren't going for a walk


came for this, leaving satisfied...
 
2014-03-13 05:23:38 PM
get him a body bag, yeah
 
2014-03-13 05:24:34 PM
Here's a pic of the recently re-deceased:

eightiesmovies.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-13 05:27:22 PM
The coroner will never hear the end of this:

"It appears victim was crushed by a bus. Hit by two cars. And then cut in half by a tractor."

"Really? Are you sure this time? Don't be too hasty now Doc!"
 
2014-03-13 05:37:25 PM
Maybe it's just the voice I read the headline in. But I LOLed.
 
2014-03-13 05:37:36 PM
He woke-up in the morgue, wrapped in plastic?  And the coroner's name is Dexter?
 
2014-03-13 05:45:11 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: get him a body bag, yeah

 
2014-03-13 05:46:41 PM
anthonyjosephevans.com
 
2014-03-13 05:46:50 PM
So his status is still alive and on active duty?
 
2014-03-13 05:51:22 PM
I wouldn't touch that guy with a ten-foot embalming tube.
 
2014-03-13 05:57:12 PM
The following method to determine death has never failed: Pierce his side with a spear.

For values of never not exceeding about 2000 years.
 
2014-03-13 05:57:20 PM
Not the coroners fault...who pronounces someone dead who isn't. Doctors! Lawsuit incoming. I mean, maybe being in a plastic bag for hours led to death #2! Gotta think
 
2014-03-13 05:59:51 PM

Anayalator: Subtard: Yea rhymes with hay, down by the may, I just may


what does EBOD rhyme with?
 
2014-03-13 06:35:55 PM

Finger51: Anayalator: Subtard: Yea rhymes with hay, down by the may, I just may

what does EBOD rhyme with?


Awww, sweetums, did you get your feelers hurt? You go ahead and butcher English all day.

www.hollyscoop.com
 
2014-03-13 06:40:54 PM
"... now stay dead, Gramps!"
 
2014-03-13 06:46:08 PM

Finger51: Anayalator: Subtard: Yea rhymes with hay, down by the may, I just may

what does EBOD rhyme with?


"While you're listening to Styx
Please sir, EABOD"
 
2014-03-13 07:31:33 PM

tinyarena: The coroner will never hear the end of this:

"It appears victim was crushed by a bus. Hit by two cars. And then cut in half by a tractor."

"Really? Are you sure this time? Don't be too hasty now Doc!"


This coroner will be keeping an EKG machine with him at all times now.

No pulse? Uh, let me triple check with my machine here.
 
2014-03-13 07:49:15 PM
this time they cut off his head, and drove a stake through vlad's heart.  there were too many unexplained gruesome murders since gramps came back from the dead.
 
2014-03-13 08:56:18 PM
And the man who finally put this foul beast down:

cinemassacre.com

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-13 10:06:16 PM
 "Final Resuscitation II...The Second Coming"
 
2014-03-13 10:55:35 PM
so Second Chance finally died?

/literary-type obscure
 
2014-03-14 02:43:40 PM

K3rmy: Finger51: Anayalator: Subtard: Yea rhymes with hay, down by the may, I just may

what does EBOD rhyme with?

"While you're listening to Styx
Please sir, EABOD"


+1
 
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