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(AP)   Schlafly Beer and Phyllis Schlafly fight over who gets to trademark the family name. I'm guessing most Farkers will support the former for one or more reasons   (hosted.ap.org) divider line 56
    More: Amusing, Phyllis Schlafly, Conservapedia, Equal Rights Amendment, Schlafly beer, Eagle Forum, Trademark Office, proposed amendments to the United States Constitution  
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724 clicks; posted to Politics » on 13 Mar 2014 at 11:31 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



56 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-13 10:22:08 AM  
Every autumn I look forward to my first taste of Schlafly Pumpkin Ale. I've tried many pumpkin beers, and so far nothing has knocked it off the top of my favorites list.
 
2014-03-13 11:33:26 AM  
I don't care one way or the other for Schlafly beer really, but they're a commercial enterprise, and Phyllis is a raging mega-douchenozzle. Give it to the beer.
 
2014-03-13 11:33:51 AM  

Sybarite: Every autumn I look forward to my first taste of Schlafly Pumpkin Ale. I've tried many pumpkin beers, and so far nothing has knocked it off the top of my favorites list.


Yep.

Also, I went to high school with one of the Schlafly kids. Nice girl, was our class president for a year.
 
2014-03-13 11:35:46 AM  
Who? Oh. Well, I don't know if I'd want a beer associated with a self hating monster coont.
 
2014-03-13 11:37:36 AM  
She clearly does not have equal rights to that name.
 
2014-03-13 11:42:14 AM  
Isn't that old coont dead yet?
 
2014-03-13 11:42:25 AM  
Gets my vote.
schlafly.com
 
2014-03-13 11:43:20 AM  
But Phyllis Schlafly has asked the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to deny the request, lest any implied association with beer sully her 60-year political career.

HA!  That's a good one.
 
2014-03-13 11:44:29 AM  
You know, if I were writing a book that had a character who was a complete biatch and prude, "Phyllis Schalfly'" would  be a great name.  Even her name is unpleasant.
 
2014-03-13 11:45:12 AM  
Their beer is just okay. O'Fallon makes better stuff.
 
2014-03-13 11:47:42 AM  
The old bint will kick off soon enough.
 
2014-03-13 11:48:30 AM  
Christ, she was last relivent back in, what, 1980? Shut up, your 15 minutes were up 30 years ago!
 
2014-03-13 11:49:52 AM  
Bitter Racist coont IPA
 
2014-03-13 11:50:59 AM  

verbaltoxin: Their beer is just okay. O'Fallon makes better stuff.


Mmmm mmmm, Wheach. Haven't thought of that in a while, but now I may have to stop on the way home for some. My wife and I both love it, and their other offerings are normally as good. I've never had a bad Schlafly beer, either.

/yay unplanned beer thread!
 
2014-03-13 11:52:42 AM  
I'm afraid of a strong, conservative woman, so I'm backing the beer.
 
2014-03-13 11:56:54 AM  
I'm not a huge fan of their beer, but Schlafly Bottleworks is probably the best brewpub I've ever been to.

Oh, and fark Phyllis.  You think women belong in the kitchen, why don't you go back there so that no one has to hear your bullshiat ever again.
 
2014-03-13 11:57:34 AM  
Why don't we feed the beer to her kid until such time as he succumbs to its effects?

// you mean "as a compromise"?
// meh
 
2014-03-13 11:58:19 AM  
Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]


Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.
 
2014-03-13 12:00:29 PM  
She's pro-rape (she just doesn't call it rape though)

"By getting married, the woman has consented to sex, and I don't think you can call it rape."
 
2014-03-13 12:02:48 PM  

Richard C Stanford: Christ, she was last relivent back in, what, 1980? Shut up, your 15 minutes were up 30 years ago!


The last time she was relevant was when Bill the Cat had a love affair with her in Bloom County, and I think that was the mid-'80s, so close enough.
 
2014-03-13 12:03:54 PM  

Farker Soze: She's pro-rape (she just doesn't call it rape though)

"By getting married, the woman has consented to sex, and I don't think you can call it rape."


I don't think it surprises anyone that she's a republican.
 
2014-03-13 12:09:56 PM  

DarnoKonrad: Bitter Racist coont IPA


IPAs are too hipster.

Bitter Racist Coont Chocolate Stout. "It's big and black and will drive the white wimmin crazy"
 
2014-03-13 12:11:53 PM  
"There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol," said Andrew Schlafly, a New Jersey lawyer who represents his mother in the matter. "Certainly alcohol has a connotation that is the opposite of conservative values."

I guess everyone in Stockman's hot tub at CPAC missed that memo.
 
2014-03-13 12:12:26 PM  
"There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol," said Andrew Schlafly, a New Jersey lawyer who represents his mother in the matter.

[citation needed]

"Certainly alcohol has a connotation that is the opposite of conservative values."

Which is why they held CPAC in noted dry-town LAS farkING VEGAS.
 
2014-03-13 12:14:44 PM  
She was as instrumental as any non-politician in wrecking the Equal Rights Amendment.  So she can go die a fiery death for all I care.  She's the non-Holocaust definition of the willing Sonderkommando.
 
2014-03-13 12:19:17 PM  

Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: She was as instrumental as any non-politician in wrecking the Equal Rights Amendment.  So she can go die a fiery death for all I care.  She's the non-Holocaust definition of the willing Sonderkommando.


So much THIS.
 
2014-03-13 12:19:52 PM  
This is actually a fascinating legal issue. There is no cause of action here for infringement, because the goods and services provided by the competing parties are unrelated (that's why there could be Eagle brand condensed milk and Eagle hardware). The suit sounds in trademark dilution (specifically, tarnishment), which is a relatively new cause of action under the federal statute, having been around only for 20 years or so, although some states recognized the doctrine earlier. Courts have been surprisingly expansive in their interpretation of the federal antidilution statute, but I don't think there's much authority to support the plaintiff's case here, especially when the defendant clearly has the stronger claim of secondary meaning.
 
2014-03-13 12:20:30 PM  

whither_apophis: DarnoKonrad: Bitter Racist coont IPA

IPAs are too hipster.

Bitter Racist Coont Chocolate Stout. "It's big and black and will drive the white wimmin crazy"


That's a winner
 
2014-03-13 12:22:59 PM  

whither_apophis: DarnoKonrad: Bitter Racist coont IPA

IPAs are too hipster.

Bitter Racist Coont Chocolate Stout. "It's big and black and will drive the white wimmin crazy"


double bioch
 
2014-03-13 12:25:32 PM  

Wellon Dowd: "There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol," said Andrew Schlafly, a New Jersey lawyer who represents his mother in the matter. "Certainly alcohol has a connotation that is the opposite of conservative values."

I guess everyone in Stockman's hot tub at CPAC missed that memo.


(In reply to her comments):

... and there are *hundreds* of millions of Americans who are pro-alcohol. We win.

I guess she's either unaware that Prohibition gave a huge boost to organized crime, or she thinks that was a good thing.

/Item # 17 on my list of things to do when I get a time machine - Drown Carrie Nation at birth.
 
2014-03-13 12:29:12 PM  

Wellon Dowd: "There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol," said Andrew Schlafly, a New Jersey lawyer who represents his mother in the matter. "Certainly alcohol has a connotation that is the opposite of conservative values."

I guess everyone in Stockman's hot tub at CPAC missed that memo.


"There are dozens of us!  DOZENS!"
 
2014-03-13 12:31:45 PM  
Well, one is bitter, gassy, and cold. And the other is Schlafly Beer.

/Did you see what I did there, Jeff? Did you see?
 
2014-03-13 12:33:40 PM  
They make a decent Pale Ale. Nothing to knock your dong off but tastier than say something along the lines of a fat tire.
 
2014-03-13 12:36:37 PM  
Phyllis has got a real potato of a lawyer in this case, so the beer won't have any problems.
 
2014-03-13 12:36:52 PM  

Last Man on Earth: Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]

Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.


What kind of god forsaken beer desert do you live in!?  For heaven's sake, escape while you still can!
 
2014-03-13 12:40:20 PM  

BeesNuts: Last Man on Earth: Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]

Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.

What kind of god forsaken beer desert do you live in!?  For heaven's sake, escape while you still can!


Virginia, about an hour away from Richmond.  Not a lot of big beer distributors in my town.  Plenty of places with an assload of wine, but craft beer has much fewer options, other than the local brewery.
 
2014-03-13 12:40:44 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: Wellon Dowd: "There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol," said Andrew Schlafly, a New Jersey lawyer who represents his mother in the matter. "Certainly alcohol has a connotation that is the opposite of conservative values."

I guess everyone in Stockman's hot tub at CPAC missed that memo.

(In reply to her comments):

... and there are *hundreds* of millions of Americans who are pro-alcohol. We win.

I guess she's either unaware that Prohibition gave a huge boost to organized crime, or she thinks that was a good thing.

/Item # 17 on my list of things to do when I get a time machine - Drown Carrie Nation at birth.


His*

Andy is the son, Phyllis is the mom.
 
2014-03-13 12:41:18 PM  

BMulligan: This is actually a fascinating legal issue. There is no cause of action here for infringement, because the goods and services provided by the competing parties are unrelated (that's why there could be Eagle brand condensed milk and Eagle hardware). The suit sounds in trademark dilution (specifically, tarnishment), which is a relatively new cause of action under the federal statute, having been around only for 20 years or so, although some states recognized the doctrine earlier. Courts have been surprisingly expansive in their interpretation of the federal antidilution statute, but I don't think there's much authority to support the plaintiff's case here, especially when the defendant clearly has the stronger claim of secondary meaning.


Respectfully, I believe you're jumping the gun... This isn't about infringement or dilution yet, but rather that Beer-guy is attempting to register his company name on the principal register, while Misogynist-lady is opposing it. Specifically, rather than Lanham §32 or 43, this is about §2:
No trademark by which the goods of the applicant may be distinguished from the goods of others shall be refused registration on the principal register on account of its nature unless it--
(a)  Consists of or comprises... matter which may disparage or falsely suggest a connection with persons, living or dead, institutions, beliefs, or national symbols, or bring them into contempt, or disrepute...


The old lady is opposing registration of the mark on the grounds that it falsely implies a connection to her and/or may damage her reputation. And honestly, she's right for two reasons: (i) when most people think of "Schlafly", they think of that hateful biatch; and (ii) being associated with something as wonderful as a tasty beer would certainly damage her reputation for spite, rape-apology, opposition of equal rights, etc. She worked for many years to be recognized as a demonic plague on this land, and beer might wash away some of that hard-earned stain.
 
2014-03-13 12:45:16 PM  
COFFEE STOUT.

That is all.
 
2014-03-13 12:50:19 PM  

Last Man on Earth: BeesNuts: Last Man on Earth: Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]

Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.

What kind of god forsaken beer desert do you live in!?  For heaven's sake, escape while you still can!

Virginia, about an hour away from Richmond.  Not a lot of big beer distributors in my town.  Plenty of places with an assload of wine, but craft beer has much fewer options, other than the local brewery.your kitchen.


FTFY.  Do it.  You will never look back.
 
2014-03-13 12:50:50 PM  
There are tens of millions of Americans who oppose alcohol

No, no there are not
 
2014-03-13 12:52:22 PM  

Last Man on Earth: BeesNuts: Last Man on Earth: Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]

Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.

What kind of god forsaken beer desert do you live in!?  For heaven's sake, escape while you still can!

Virginia, about an hour away from Richmond.  Not a lot of big beer distributors in my town.  Plenty of places with an assload of wine, but craft beer has much fewer options, other than the local brewery.


Remind me never to go to Richmond or the surrounding region.  I've been going to the same liquor store for going on 6 years now, and every time I leave I have 4 six-packs of beers which I've never even seen before.
 
2014-03-13 12:55:10 PM  

Theaetetus: BMulligan: This is actually a fascinating legal issue. There is no cause of action here for infringement, because the goods and services provided by the competing parties are unrelated (that's why there could be Eagle brand condensed milk and Eagle hardware). The suit sounds in trademark dilution (specifically, tarnishment), which is a relatively new cause of action under the federal statute, having been around only for 20 years or so, although some states recognized the doctrine earlier. Courts have been surprisingly expansive in their interpretation of the federal antidilution statute, but I don't think there's much authority to support the plaintiff's case here, especially when the defendant clearly has the stronger claim of secondary meaning.

Respectfully, I believe you're jumping the gun... This isn't about infringement or dilution yet, but rather that Beer-guy is attempting to register his company name on the principal register, while Misogynist-lady is opposing it. Specifically, rather than Lanham §32 or 43, this is about §2:
No trademark by which the goods of the applicant may be distinguished from the goods of others shall be refused registration on the principal register on account of its nature unless it--
(a)  Consists of or comprises... matter which may disparage or falsely suggest a connection with persons, living or dead, institutions, beliefs, or national symbols, or bring them into contempt, or disrepute...

The old lady is opposing registration of the mark on the grounds that it falsely implies a connection to her and/or may damage her reputation. And honestly, she's right for two reasons: (i) when most people think of "Schlafly", they think of that hateful biatch; and (ii) being associated with something as wonderful as a tasty beer would certainly damage her reputation for spite, rape-apology, opposition of equal rights, etc. She worked for many years to be recognized as a demonic plague on this land, and beer might wash away some of that hard-e ...


Fair point, and it's an interesting question.  Does the statute provide any exception for intent?  It's named after the brewer, not after her, and he didn't choose to make his aunt a famous biatch-queen.  A famous figure being able to block any coincidental association with her name seems like a very broad interpretation of the law.  Not incorrect, necessarily, but a judge reading it that way seems like an unusual decision.
 
2014-03-13 12:58:10 PM  

rtaylor92: They make a decent Pale Ale. Nothing to knock your dong off but tastier than say something along the lines of a fat tire.


At least compare a similar beer.  Fat Tire ain't all that (it's decent), but it is an American Amber Ale and fairly different than a Pale Ale (most famous American Pale Ale has to be Sierra Nevada right?)
 
2014-03-13 01:00:04 PM  

BeesNuts: Remind me never to go to Richmond or the surrounding region. I've been going to the same liquor store for going on 6 years now, and every time I leave I have 4 six-packs of beers which I've never even seen before.


Eh, Williamsburg is a fairly small town.  Other than Wine Seller and the ABC stores, there just aren't a lot of big alcohol places, and those are fairly specific.

Saiga410: FTFY. Do it. You will never look back.


I've actually just started.  I'm starting small, with a DIY kit lager that will doubtless turn out atrocious, but after this, I might be able to expand into actual brewing.  I have no room for any of it, of course, but I can try to find a little space in my apartment.
 
2014-03-13 01:24:57 PM  

ladodger34: rtaylor92: They make a decent Pale Ale. Nothing to knock your dong off but tastier than say something along the lines of a fat tire.

At least compare a similar beer.  Fat Tire ain't all that (it's decent), but it is an American Amber Ale and fairly different than a Pale Ale (most famous American Pale Ale has to be Sierra Nevada right?)


All true and I'm an idiot.
 
2014-03-13 01:25:55 PM  

Last Man on Earth: Fair point, and it's an interesting question.  Does the statute provide any exception for intent?  It's named after the brewer, not after her, and he didn't choose to make his aunt a famous biatch-queen.  A famous figure being able to block any coincidental association with her name seems like a very broad interpretation of the law.  Not incorrect, necessarily, but a judge reading it that way seems like an unusual decision.


Nope - it's purely objective:
"... matter which may disparage or falsely suggest a connection with persons, living or dead, institutions, beliefs, or national symbols, or bring them into contempt, or disrepute"
Basically, the judge makes a factual determination as to whether a reasonable person would assume that Schlafly Beer was associated with Phyllis Schlafly and/or whether the reasonable person would think that it damages her reputation via the association. It rests primarily on how well Phyllis Schlafly is known or how famous she is, such that people instantly associate any use of the last name with her.

Now, none of this means that Schlafly Beer can't keep using the name... just that they can't register on the principal register, which would give a presumption of ownership and distinctiveness. Instead, they'll have to register on the supplemental register, and can move to the principal register in three years. Of course, Phyllis can still attempt to have it canceled during the interim.
 
2014-03-13 01:30:50 PM  

Theaetetus: Last Man on Earth: Fair point, and it's an interesting question.  Does the statute provide any exception for intent?  It's named after the brewer, not after her, and he didn't choose to make his aunt a famous biatch-queen.  A famous figure being able to block any coincidental association with her name seems like a very broad interpretation of the law.  Not incorrect, necessarily, but a judge reading it that way seems like an unusual decision.

Nope - it's purely objective:
"... matter which may disparage or falsely suggest a connection with persons, living or dead, institutions, beliefs, or national symbols, or bring them into contempt, or disrepute"
Basically, the judge makes a factual determination as to whether a reasonable person would assume that Schlafly Beer was associated with Phyllis Schlafly and/or whether the reasonable person would think that it damages her reputation via the association. It rests primarily on how well Phyllis Schlafly is known or how famous she is, such that people instantly associate any use of the last name with her.

Now, none of this means that Schlafly Beer can't keep using the name... just that they can't register on the principal register, which would give a presumption of ownership and distinctiveness. Instead, they'll have to register on the supplemental register, and can move to the principal register in three years. Of course, Phyllis can still attempt to have it canceled during the interim.


Fair enough, IP law really isn't my field.  Once you get into corporate and transactional work, I tend to just glaze over.
 
2014-03-13 01:36:01 PM  
Blow it out your ass Phyllis Schlafly, what's wrong with a mind of my own.
 
2014-03-13 01:53:03 PM  

BeesNuts: Last Man on Earth: Not likely, Phyllis.  He's naming it after himself, and you have no particular claim on a last name over anyone else with that name.

Conthan: Gets my vote.
[schlafly.com image 377x675]

Oh wow, that looks seriously tasty.  Shame I'm so damn far from St. Louis, I don't have any real shot at getting it.

What kind of god forsaken beer desert do you live in!?  For heaven's sake, escape while you still can!


Schlafly isn't national and they're at their limits production-wise. Rumor has it they're looking at like 40 acres down by the River City Casino in order to build a big enough factory and distribution center to go big time.
 
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