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(Des Moines Register)   Still no cure for cancer, but scientists have debunked the myth that Kansas and Iowa are really flat states   (desmoinesregister.com) divider line 66
    More: Spiffy, Kansas, Iowa, cure for cancer, myths  
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3578 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Mar 2014 at 3:26 PM (40 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-12 02:34:44 PM  
Wow, I thought "flattest" was tongue and cheek.

Kansas ain't all that flat:

larrybrownsports.com
 
2014-03-12 03:28:40 PM  
I think they just debunked the myth that pancakes are flat.
 
2014-03-12 03:32:00 PM  
That doesn't mean it doesn't suck.

/Florida still sucks more
 
2014-03-12 03:33:22 PM  
But Illinois, just to the east, comes in as second-flattest

exclaim.ca

That's my favorite mountain in Illinois.
 
2014-03-12 03:33:34 PM  
Everyone that uses the "still no cure for cancer" cliche needs to either STFU or get off their own ass, get a biomedical degree and start researching, themselves.
 
2014-03-12 03:34:13 PM  
Kansas is not flat
assets.nydailynews.com

Neither is Iowa
www.pageantupdate.info
 
2014-03-12 03:35:02 PM  
The scientific study mentioned in the article: "Kansas is flatter than a pancake"
 
2014-03-12 03:35:42 PM  
"The erroneous image of being totally flat and treeless" affects recruiting for jobs, he told KU News Service.

I'm sure that's all there is to it.  Not that there isn't a single bagel place in this whole town, there's more police officers than road repair specialists, and the average age of the population is in the high 60s.  And we need signs on our building doors saying "no guns."

/limited government my ass.
 
2014-03-12 03:36:12 PM  

2 Replies: Everyone that uses the "still no cure for cancer" cliche needs to either STFU or get off their own ass, get a biomedical degree and start researching, themselves.


Your grant proposal just get turned down?
 
2014-03-12 03:39:18 PM  
Flat things can be appealing.

i.imgur.com i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-12 03:39:49 PM  
My own scientific study from 20 years ago confirmed that Kansas is the most boring state to drive across.
 
2014-03-12 03:41:06 PM  
Yadda yadda, RAGBRAI, yadda yadda.
 
2014-03-12 03:41:15 PM  
I think the distinct lack of anything contribute to Kansas feeling very flat. Also I-70 through Kansas has got to be the most boring stretch of road in the interstate system.
 
2014-03-12 03:43:45 PM  
Researchers at the University of Kansas, who set out to debunk their own state's flatness reputation, did a "geomorphometric analysis" of 48 states and Washington, D.C., by measuring the rise of land at the horizon.

What I get from this is that they redefined "flat" in such a way that they could support the conclusion they wanted.
 
2014-03-12 03:45:14 PM  
So a high-mountain valley floor would count as "flat" even though it's 4,000 ft. above sea level?  Nice job guys.  Your study sucks.
 
2014-03-12 03:45:45 PM  

OutLawSuit: I think the distinct lack of anything contribute to Kansas feeling very flat. Also I-70 through Kansas has got to be the most boring stretch of road in the interstate system.


Long stretches through Montana are miles and miles of miles and miles of nothing
 
2014-03-12 03:46:17 PM  
I'm heading off to Iowa to work a gig tomorrow.  It'll be my third time at the same museum in the Quad Cities, and Iowa certainly isn't flat.  Bettendorf and Davenport actually have a lot of hilly areas.  In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...
 
2014-03-12 03:50:35 PM  

FarkingReading: My own scientific study from 20 years ago confirmed that Kansas is the most boring state to drive across.


I dont know.  I've driven Illinois from top to bottom on numerous occasions and at the end each trip on the way down I say, "Thank God, I'm in Kentucky!".

And how often do you hear that?
 
2014-03-12 03:51:02 PM  

FarkingReading: My own scientific study from 20 years ago confirmed that Kansas is the most boring state to drive across.


I dunno, Kansas I thought was okay, same for Nebraska, Iowa, South Dakota and Oklahoma. The state I thought was just awful was Illinois south of I-80. Not only boring, but ugly, too.
 
2014-03-12 03:51:26 PM  

Kinetic King: I'm heading off to Iowa to work a gig tomorrow.  It'll be my third time at the same museum in the Quad Cities, and Iowa certainly isn't flat.  Bettendorf and Davenport actually have a lot of hilly areas.  In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...


As someone currently sitting at a desk in Davenport, may I ask what you'll be doing tomorrow?
 
2014-03-12 03:54:18 PM  

Harry Freakstorm: But Illinois, just to the east, comes in as second-flattest

[exclaim.ca image 460x335]

That's my favorite mountain in Illinois.


I watched that for the first time literally 2 days ago on Netflix. Weird.

Illinois, just to the east, comes in as second-flattest

As someone that's driven 57 between Chicago and Champaign dozens and dozens of times, I'm not shocked in the least. Somehow, 55 between Chicago and Springfield is even worse.
 
2014-03-12 03:57:51 PM  

FarkingReading: My own scientific study from 20 years ago confirmed that Kansas is the most boring state to drive across.


I've driven from Chicago to California and back. It's definitely Nebraska.

The longest straight stretch of interstate anywhere in the Interstate Highway System is the approximately 72 miles (116 km) of I-80 occurring between Exit 318 in the Grand Island area and mile marker 390 near Lincoln, Nebraska. Along this length, the road does not vary from an ideally straight line by more than a few yards.

And it smells bad.
 
2014-03-12 03:58:11 PM  

Wellon Dowd: Flat things can be appealing.

[i.imgur.com image 400x800] [i.imgur.com image 400x800]


I need to research that statement more. Who is that?
 
2014-03-12 03:59:49 PM  

justanotherfarkinfarker: Wellon Dowd: Flat things can be appealing.

[i.imgur.com image 400x800] [i.imgur.com image 400x800]

I need to research that statement more. Who is that?


Riley Reid.

i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-12 03:59:54 PM  

EmperorSled: Kinetic King: I'm heading off to Iowa to work a gig tomorrow.  It'll be my third time at the same museum in the Quad Cities, and Iowa certainly isn't flat.  Bettendorf and Davenport actually have a lot of hilly areas.  In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...

As someone currently sitting at a desk in Davenport, may I ask what you'll be doing tomorrow?


I'm just flying tomorrow, but Friday and Saturday, I'll be doing an exhibition at the Family Museum in Bettendorf, one of the best children's museums in the country...
 
2014-03-12 04:01:10 PM  

TomD9938: FarkingReading: My own scientific study from 20 years ago confirmed that Kansas is the most boring state to drive across.

I dont know.  I've driven Illinois from top to bottom on numerous occasions and at the end each trip on the way down I say, "Thank God, I'm in Kentucky!".

And how often do you hear that?


I flew to New Orleans in January and drove back to Chicago. Illinois was definitely the worst stretch of the drive. I forgot how long this stupid state is.
 
2014-03-12 04:05:21 PM  
Lots of hate for Illinois' being boring.

Interesting. I never knew that. I've only ever flown in and out there. In fact, I don't think I've ever even been in a car in Illinois.
 
2014-03-12 04:07:42 PM  

kitsuneymg: Researchers at the University of Kansas, who set out to debunk their own state's flatness reputation, did a "geomorphometric analysis" of 48 states and Washington, D.C., by measuring the rise of land at the horizon.

What I get from this is that they redefined "flat" in such a way that they could support the conclusion they wanted.


Yeah, it seems like they are trying to limit any given sample size down to "what I can see."

If we accept that, then you could make the argument that the Earth really is flat just because "It looks flat from where I am standing right now."
 
2014-03-12 04:10:35 PM  

Wellon Dowd: Riley Reid.


Thanks. I knew I've seen that ass before.
 
2014-03-12 04:12:39 PM  
Kinetic King: In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...

I lived in Portland, Oregon for ten years, and having to explain this to disbelieving Portlanders got so old I finally gave up and resorted to bitterness.

Especially when Iowa made the logical choice on marriage equality.  I still hold that over my Portland folk.

I got so sick of Portlanders (Portlandia is a stupid show mostly because it doesn't accurately capture just how weird that place really is--it's so much stranger than what you see on the show) and their ostensibly-well-intentioned-white-liberal hypocrisy that I fled back to Iowa two years ago.

Can't say I'm necessarily happy to be here again.  But we Iowans  are nicer than just about anybody.
 
2014-03-12 04:17:28 PM  
Eastern Iowa is anything but flat.

And I 5 through the Central Valley is a long slag of a road.
 
2014-03-12 04:23:37 PM  

Banned on the Run: Kansas is not flat


I think anyone who tattoos a large block of text on their side probably has not been "granted wisdom", but that's just me.

Kansas may not be "the flattest", but it's pretty damn flat and boring. Seventh flattest is still pretty flat. It's top 14 percentile.
 
2014-03-12 04:26:49 PM  
The results: Florida is, in fact, the nation's flattest state.

It depends on your definition of "flat".

Florida is flattest if you define flat as "lowest point to highest point"; Florida goes from sea-level to about 300 feet or so.

Kansas is flat as fark if you define flat as "fewest bumps" (hills, valleys, etc). Maybe "smoothest" would be a better term, but when you are standing there, "smooth" isn't the adjective that comes to mind, it's "flat".
 
2014-03-12 04:27:55 PM  

IAmYourBrainOnDrugs: Kinetic King: In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...

I lived in Portland, Oregon for ten years, and having to explain this to disbelieving Portlanders got so old I finally gave up and resorted to bitterness.

Especially when Iowa made the logical choice on marriage equality.  I still hold that over my Portland folk.

I got so sick of Portlanders (Portlandia is a stupid show mostly because it doesn't accurately capture just how weird that place really is--it's so much stranger than what you see on the show) and their ostensibly-well-intentioned-white-liberal hypocrisy that I fled back to Iowa two years ago.

Can't say I'm necessarily happy to be here again.  But we Iowans  are nicer than just about anybody.


My all-time favorite place to live would be the island of Kauai so I could scuba dive every day.  Otherwise, I'd much rather prefer a place like Davenport (birthplace of Bix Beiderbecke) or Rochester, New York over a trendy place like San Francisco or Manhattan.

When I was in Beverly Hills a few years ago, I walked along the famed Sunset Boulevard.  Very over-rated--mile after mile of tanning salons, nail clinics, and over-priced clothing stores.  From what I heard of San Francisco, it costs $5K a month for a walk-up closet.  Manhattan was intense, but if I lived near Times Square, I'd go insane after a week or so.  Bah.

Rochester, New York has the Strong Museum, a small skyway system (coincidentally, Rochester, Minnesota has one as well), and the walking paths along the Genessee River are very beautiful.  The George Eastman House in Rochester is a Mecca for movie-history nuts like myself and I enjoyed it better than Disneyland.  The campus of Indiana Purdue Fort Wayne was surprisingly beautiful and I took lots of pictures there for my website.  Manhattan, Kansas might not be as big as the other Manhattan, but it was still nice to visit Kansas State University.  Essen might be one of the smaller cities in Germany, but still has a kick-ass subway system.  Probably nobody knows of Zwolle outside of the Netherlands, but I certainly wouldn't mind living there, either.  Hastings, Minnesota is a pretty cool river town as well.

In other words, the trendy spots of the world are seriously over-rated, and there's a zillion out-of-the-way places that deserve a second look...
 
2014-03-12 04:31:23 PM  

Khazar-Khum: Eastern Iowa is anything but flat.

www.igsb.uiowa.edu


When I have time on my trips south, I like to take the Mississippi River Road instead of the interstates.

The river valley through eastern Iowa / western Illinois is really quite stunning and is something to behold.  The above pic is looking across the river at northeastern Iowa.

/ it's not as beautiful as the valley through eastern Minnesota and western Wisconsin, of course.
 
2014-03-12 04:31:45 PM  
I've ridden a bike across IA twice, doing it again this year. It's not flat. Lots of rolling hills. Lots of corn. Good people.
 
2014-03-12 04:33:59 PM  
When I drive through western Kansas I try to make sure I time it right so we all get to see the Tree. There really is one. But you have to watch for it ..
 
2014-03-12 04:36:08 PM  
TomD9938:

/ it's not as beautiful as the valley through eastern Minnesota and western Wisconsin, of course.

I love the drive along Highway 61 between Red Wing and Winona.  One of the most beautiful drives in the country...
 
2014-03-12 04:38:26 PM  

GregInIndy: I've ridden a bike across IA twice, doing it again this year. It's not flat. Lots of rolling hills. Lots of corn. Good people.


Ahh, yes, RAGBRAI. A drunken party careening across Iowa.
 
2014-03-12 04:44:10 PM  
I'm calling shenanigans.  Looking out the window from 37,000 feet with a gin and tonic in my hand, it sure as hell looks flat.
 
2014-03-12 04:46:45 PM  

Kinetic King: TomD9938:

/ it's not as beautiful as the valley through eastern Minnesota and western Wisconsin, of course.

I love the drive along Highway 61 between Red Wing and Winona.  One of the most beautiful drives in the country...


I couldn't agree more.  Late fall or early spring when there are no leaves on the trees is the best time for it IMHO.

It's nice in summer too, but the leaves make it harder to take in the whole valley as you're driving.
 
2014-03-12 04:50:06 PM  
Kinetic King:My all-time favorite place to live would be the island of Kauai so I could scuba dive every day.  Otherwise, I'd much rather prefer a place like Davenport (birthplace of Bix Beiderbecke) or Rochester, New York over a trendy place like San Francisco or Manhattan.

College towns in general are awesome.  I've been to Manhattan and Lawrence and had great experiences in both places.

I lived on Oahu for five years when I was a kid.  I hated Hawaii--Kauai is pretty nice if you can afford to live there, but I probably wouldn't live there just because of the tweaker quotient.  That said, if I ever found a way to make it work on the Big Island, I'd seriously consider it.

I've always been a huge fan of Bellingham, Washington, myself.  That and, oddly enough, Boise Idaho.

You seem like a pretty well-traveled, lucid-thinking person.  That's a favorite right there.  Cheers.
 
2014-03-12 04:56:54 PM  

TomD9938: Kinetic King: TomD9938:

/ it's not as beautiful as the valley through eastern Minnesota and western Wisconsin, of course.

I love the drive along Highway 61 between Red Wing and Winona.  One of the most beautiful drives in the country...

I couldn't agree more.  Late fall or early spring when there are no leaves on the trees is the best time for it IMHO.

It's nice in summer too, but the leaves make it harder to take in the whole valley as you're driving.


Lake City is one of the nicest places on the planet and supposedly water-skiing was invented in nearby Lake Pepin.  Wabasha was where "Grumpy Old Men" was filmed and, IIRC, they still celebrate Grumpy Old Men Days.  Winona is a classic college town and would be a great place to live.  And, like eastern Iowa, it's actually quite hilly along 61.

Now western Minnesota or anywhere in South Dakota east of the Badlands is what I would consider flat.  If you're driving Interstate 90 through South Dakota, you can just aim your car westward and take a nap.  The only distractions are the Wall Drug signs every 5 miles or so.  Gotta admit that Wall Drug was pretty fun, only drug store I've been in with a chapel...
 
2014-03-12 04:57:30 PM  

theorellior: GregInIndy: I've ridden a bike across IA twice, doing it again this year. It's not flat. Lots of rolling hills. Lots of corn. Good people.

Ahh, yes, RAGBRAI. A drunken party careening across Iowa.


The year RAGBRAI and the Bix finished at the same time in downtown Davenport there was a heck of a party. It was a good thing I could crash at my office downtown.
 
2014-03-12 05:01:23 PM  

2 Replies: Everyone that uses the "still no cure for cancer" cliche needs to either STFU or get off their own ass, get a biomedical degree and start researching, themselves.


Wow. Somebody's mom didn't love them enough...or maybe too much.
 
2014-03-12 05:11:45 PM  
IAmYourBrainOnDrugs:
College towns in general are awesome.  I've been to Manhattan and Lawrence and had great experiences in both places.

Agreed.  I didn't see much of Fort Wayne, but the IPFW and Ivy Tech campuses were really beautiful.  Haven't been to Lawrence, but Manhattan is surprisingly big--big enough to have an airport.

I lived on Oahu for five years when I was a kid.  I hated Hawaii--Kauai is pretty nice if you can afford to live there, but I probably wouldn't live there just because of the tweaker quotient.  That said, if I ever found a way to make it work on the Big Island, I'd seriously consider it.

I only spent a couple of weeks in Kauai myself, and somehow lucked out by not encountering any tweakers, though I've heard there's a lot of them in Hawaii.  The Na Pali coast was extraordinarily beautiful.  The most mind-blowing thing about Hawaii, though, is that it was nowhere as hot as I expected.  I thought it was like any other tropical area where it's 100 Fahrenheit in the shade, and was shocked that it's actually cooler in the summer than Minnesota.  IIRC, the highest temperature ever recorded in Honolulu was 95, but it easily goes over 100 in the Twin Cities nearly every summer.

I've always been a huge fan of Bellingham, Washington, myself.  That and, oddly enough, Boise Idaho.

I only visited Seattle once and didn't go beyond that, so I'll take your word for Bellingham.  Dated a woman who lived in a town along the Pacific coast of Washington--can't recall right now if it's Aberdeen or something like that--and she seemed to enjoy living there.  I've seen pictures of Boise and it looks like a pleasant enough place as well.

You seem like a pretty well-traveled, lucid-thinking person.  That's a favorite right there.  Cheers.

Thanks for the compliment, IAmYourBrains!  You seem to be very down-to-Earth yourself, a quality I like in people.  Truth is, I want to do a lot more traveling in the future as I didn't travel much as a kid.  Gotta go out and see the world before Starbucks paves over everything.  (BTW, I saw a Starbucks in Moscow--had their logo in Latin and Cyrillic.)  Here's an image of MakDonald's in Russia...

www.lunatim.com
 
2014-03-12 05:39:32 PM  

IAmYourBrainOnDrugs: Kinetic King: In spite of the Iowa jokes, it's actually a pretty cool and progressive state...

I lived in Portland, Oregon for ten years, and having to explain this to disbelieving Portlanders got so old I finally gave up and resorted to bitterness.

Especially when Iowa made the logical choice on marriage equality.  I still hold that over my Portland folk.

I got so sick of Portlanders (Portlandia is a stupid show mostly because it doesn't accurately capture just how weird that place really is--it's so much stranger than what you see on the show) and their ostensibly-well-intentioned-white-liberal hypocrisy that I fled back to Iowa two years ago.

Can't say I'm necessarily happy to be here again.  But we Iowans  are nicer than just about anybody.


You won't convince a Portlander that Iowa is liberal until you have medical cannabis and decriminalization. That's not a slam on Iowa, either. I haven't spent any time there, but I do know some great Iowans.
 
2014-03-12 05:40:45 PM  

jaylectricity: Wow, I thought "flattest" was tongue and cheek.

Kansas ain't all that flat:

[larrybrownsports.com image 407x396]


I came here to say something else. Not sure what it was. Leaving a Jayhawk fan. Leaving for my bunk, to be more specific.
 
2014-03-12 05:51:34 PM  
meh.  I've driven the length of kansas, and I have to say, with the exception of the Hill in Lawrence, there isn't much in the way of breaks in the corn, if you will, the rest of kansas. Only state I have ever driven through where I got a sunburn on one knee, wearing shorts while driving.  The landscape never changed.

Oh, look! Colorado on the horizon.  Flat at the start, then you hit this wall of mountains, then bumpy at the back.

/from the northeast.  We have mountains, but nothing like these
 
2014-03-12 07:14:51 PM  
I29 between Fargo and Grand Forks is by far the flattest place I've ever been.  Bottom of a glacial lake bed.
 
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