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(CBS Chicago)   Chicago taxi trade newspaper demands City Council ban ride-sharing services or it will publish the names of five secretly gay aldermen. Also demands they ban the internet, require people to buy newspapers, rename Willis Tower back to Sears Tower   (chicago.cbslocal.com) divider line 43
    More: Weird, Willis Tower, Chicago, City Council ban, city councils, tags, Chicago City Council, ground transportation, aldermen  
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2803 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Mar 2014 at 10:34 AM (33 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



43 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-12 10:38:32 AM  
Thank you very much.

i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-03-12 10:40:38 AM  
Everyone still calls it the Sears
 
2014-03-12 10:40:42 AM  
So what?
 
2014-03-12 10:41:33 AM  
In what way is that not extortion?
 
2014-03-12 10:43:01 AM  

stonicus: In what way is that not extortion?


Beat me to it.  That's exactly what this is.  Where is the FBI?
 
2014-03-12 10:44:45 AM  
Holy crap, subby. I thought you were exaggerating for comedic effect. Dude actually said that, though.
 
2014-03-12 10:45:25 AM  
Someone from Chicago needs to explain this. How in the hell can a ride-share be 'taxed' $25K? Or are we talking about a far more organized ride-share than what is normal?
 
2014-03-12 10:45:37 AM  
Ok, some of the points made me laugh.
 
2014-03-12 10:46:37 AM  

stonicus: In what way is that not extortion?


-Because it might be satire?
 
2014-03-12 10:47:41 AM  
"The city is moving forward and will steamroll our industry if we don't act in earnest. They did it to my grandfather more than a hundred years ago when they destroyed his horse-drawn-carriage business by allowing horseless machines to carry people around the city," he wrote.

LMFAO!
 
2014-03-12 10:49:38 AM  
AngryDragon

stonicus: In what way is that not extortion?


Beat me to it. That's exactly what this is. Where is the FBI?


In Chicago it is persuasion by legitimate business men of certain ethnicities.
 
2014-03-12 10:50:16 AM  
What are you talking about Willis (Tower)?

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-03-12 10:51:26 AM  
10/10!  Moved to tears!  Bellisimo!

Hey, all you wannabe trolls, this guy's got it going on!  Watch and learn.
 
2014-03-12 10:52:07 AM  
It's obviously satire.

Except for the tower bit.  It's still the Sears Tower.
 
2014-03-12 10:52:38 AM  
I'm not saying it's satire, but it's probably satire
 
2014-03-12 10:54:07 AM  

AngryDragon: stonicus: In what way is that not extortion?

Beat me to it.  That's exactly what this is.  Where is the FBI?


Probably because it's an editorial... It can be satire at this point, or they could at least claim the satire defense...
 
2014-03-12 10:54:47 AM  

Hobbess: I'm not saying it's satire, but it's probably satire


He didn't demand that the Cubs win the World Series so it's probably legit.
 
2014-03-12 10:56:54 AM  

AugieDoggyDaddy: stonicus: In what way is that not extortion?

-Because it might be satire?


It just might be. Let's see what we get from those which don't read TFA.
 
2014-03-12 10:58:12 AM  

bighairyguy: Hobbess: I'm not saying it's satire, but it's probably satire

He didn't demand that the Cubs win the World Series so it's probably legit.


Good satire has to be believable. Cubs winning the Series? Ain't nobody gonna believe that.
 
2014-03-12 10:59:40 AM  
Is this ride share week here on Fark? This is like the third or fourth article about the same thing in the last few days.
 
2014-03-12 10:59:45 AM  
Because it might be satire?

I think the bit about grandad's horse and carriage business being steamrolled because they didn't bad horseless carriages in the city, was the clincher for me. Funny stuff, I must admit
 
2014-03-12 11:00:22 AM  
Inspiring to watch an author gain maturity as the work progresses. This is the stuff of great literature.
 
2014-03-12 11:00:36 AM  
"rename Willis Tower back to Sears Tower"
YES!
 
2014-03-12 11:06:12 AM  
They'll also inform slaveowners that five of their slaves are in Free Territory, and that five women are voting and walking around wearing pants.
 
2014-03-12 11:07:22 AM  
The editorial is clearly satire, and was amusing, but I think the paper's resources could be better utilized to discuss why you shouldn't pay for your Chicago taxi using a credit or debit card.

http://arstechnica.com/security/2014/ 03/beware-of-credit-card-hack-af f ecting-chicago-taxis-bank-tells-custom ers/
 
2014-03-12 11:07:51 AM  
They're not kidding! Here's the first name released:

img2.timeinc.net
 
2014-03-12 11:14:34 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: They're not kidding! Here's the first name released:

[img2.timeinc.net image 612x458]


Ohhhhh My. They are serious.
 
2014-03-12 11:22:19 AM  

Frank N Stein: Everyone still calls it the Sears


I grew up in Milwaukee taking the Amtrak to Chicago all the time to visit my mom's sister.  Sears Tower & First Wisconsin Buildings 4LIFE.
 
2014-03-12 11:29:30 AM  
It's not satire.  It's a poorly conceived attempt to avoid being charged with extortion.  Throw in some nonsense about the Sears Tower and then the Editor can claim it's satire:

It's unclear if the editorial was meant as satire, especially since Lutfallah also demanded the City Council ban the Internet and require people to buy newspapers; and change the name of the Willis Tower back to the Sears Tower. Those are two demands the City Council hardly has the power to meet or enforce.

It's blackmail.  It's extortion.  Just wait and see if some Aldermen get outed soon.

/Sears Tower.  Willis Tower.  Don't care.
//Can someone please give me directions to the Pan Am Building in NY?
 
2014-03-12 11:32:20 AM  
I thought it was called Ron White's Big Ass Building
 
2014-03-12 11:34:35 AM  
i1295.photobucket.com

Now that's what I call a taxi cab confession.
 
2014-03-12 11:50:33 AM  
The Chicago Way
 
2014-03-12 11:57:02 AM  

fastfxr: Someone from Chicago needs to explain this. How in the hell can a ride-share be 'taxed' $25K? Or are we talking about a far more organized ride-share than what is normal?


They are talking about ride sharing companies like Uber. Uber could certainly afford to pay $25k per year and they would probably pass the $3.50 per day per vehicle charge onto the drivers, which if they took on more than 1 fare a day wouldn't be too much, it might discourage some new drivers or those who only take one 1 fare a day.
 
2014-03-12 12:19:10 PM  

Frank N Stein: Everyone still calls it the Sears


Just like Comiskey will always be Comiskey.
 
2014-03-12 12:23:31 PM  
I'm kinda new at this but, Are you supposed to tell everyone that you're committing extortion? Seems like a flaw in the plan.
 
2014-03-12 12:33:16 PM  
That just means those aldermen have SWAGA: Secretly We Are Gay Aldermen.
 
2014-03-12 12:36:48 PM  

6655321: What are you talking about Willis (Tower)?

[upload.wikimedia.org image 231x353]


Whatchu talking about Wesley Willis Tower?
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-12 01:09:21 PM  
WTF is an alderman?
 
2014-03-12 02:29:02 PM  
Chicago taxi trade newspaper demands City Council ban ride-sharing services or it will publish the names of five secretly gay aldermen.

Who cares about the aldermen. The newspaper publisher should go to jail for extortion.
 
2014-03-12 04:13:09 PM  
I used Uber in Dallas last week. LOVED it! I you haven't tried Uber, give it a whirl! And if you use promo code s2uaz you'll get $20 off your first ride!*


*full disclosure - I get a bump too
 
2014-03-12 08:57:14 PM  

strangeluck: "The city is moving forward and will steamroll our industry if we don't act in earnest. They did it to my grandfather more than a hundred years ago when they destroyed his horse-drawn-carriage business by allowing horseless machines to carry people around the city," he wrote.

LMFAO!


Not a lot of upward mobility in that family, is there?
 
2014-03-12 09:23:40 PM  

PolyHatSnake: WTF is an alderman?


I thought they all got blown up by the first Death Star?
 
2014-03-13 10:58:07 AM  

Mateorabi: PolyHatSnake: WTF is an alderman?

I thought they all got blown up by the first Death Star?


No, no; he was Nixon's Chief of Staff, a key figure in the Watergate scandal.
 
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