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(Daily Mail)   I pity the fool who sues Mr. T because he claims to be his illegitimate son he abandoned causing him to not drink his school, stay in drugs, and not do milk. Unless it's just jibber jabber   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 32
    More: Unlikely, Mr. T, The A-Team, B. A. Baracus, Circuit Court of Cook County, Born-again Christian Mr. T, Camille Grammer, Rich Peverley  
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2295 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Mar 2014 at 1:00 AM (36 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



32 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-11 11:10:27 PM  
If Mr. and Mrs. T were my parents I'd pity the fool that wasn't having delicious but not really write home to mom enough amazing pre-made Bloody Marys.
 
2014-03-12 12:01:06 AM  
Claimed that being abandoned left him with low self-esteem and so he bailed out of school, was sent to juvenile hall and then joined a gang

When your father abandons you you get low self-esteem. When you get low self-esteem you drop out of school. When you drop out of school you end up in juvie. When you end up in juvie you join a gang. Get rid of cable and upgrade to DirecTV.
 
2014-03-12 01:06:25 AM  
In 1990, Alexander's mom Vanessa Taylor - who like Mr. T hails from Chicago - filed a Petition to Establish Parentage regarding Alexander.
That case was filed in the Circuit Court of Cook County, Illinois, but had been mysteriously taken of the court docket by 1994.



this being the Daily Fail, I'm going to bet it was "mysteriously" dismissed.
 
2014-03-12 01:21:14 AM  
I pity the poor fool who don't eat my cereal!
kylebstiff.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-12 01:28:03 AM  
I just hope the kid knows how to treat his momma right.
 
2014-03-12 01:31:26 AM  
I don't know if this is what you were referencing, but an old SNL TV Funhouse skit with Mr. T was a bit that always cracked me up.
 
2014-03-12 01:36:21 AM  
Thank God I'm not famous for being well-known.
 
2014-03-12 01:37:36 AM  
Statistically speaking, you are more likely to be pitied by Mr. T than you are to have feet.
 
2014-03-12 01:37:50 AM  
How much do you want to bet that Mr.T has never even met this kid, and the kid's mother was telling him stories about his father being Mr.T to make him feel special and better about himself since he didn't have a daddy.
 
2014-03-12 01:48:14 AM  
I too had a voracious ball eating father.
 
2014-03-12 02:00:51 AM  
web.archive.orgweb.archive.orgi.somethingawful.com
 
2014-03-12 02:13:59 AM  

brap: If Mr. and Mrs. T were my parents I'd pity the fool that wasn't having delicious but not really write home to mom enough amazing pre-made Bloody Marys.


bjdwsm.files.wordpress.com
I pity the farkers who didn't get that.
 
2014-03-12 03:20:35 AM  
Kid had a chance to be somebody, not be somebody's fool.

/do not throw solid objects at Mr. T
 
2014-03-12 03:34:17 AM  
 
2014-03-12 03:51:20 AM  

robohobo: [web.archive.org image 261x207][web.archive.org image 258x183][i.somethingawful.com image 250x280]


1996 called.......
 
2014-03-12 03:56:59 AM  

cretinbob: robohobo: [web.archive.org image 261x207][web.archive.org image 258x183][i.somethingawful.com image 250x280]

1996 called.......


And 1996 was awesome. At least 3 times as awesome as 2016 is going to be.
 
2014-03-12 05:33:28 AM  
who the fark is this lawyer.

can we send a god damn TNMT! copter after him?
if not... well jesus. if the ninja turtles cant do it, who will?!
 
2014-03-12 07:24:49 AM  

robohobo: [web.archive.org image 261x207][web.archive.org image 258x183][i.somethingawful.com image 250x280]


Ha! Totally forgot about the ate my balls thing! Thats some mighty fine nostalgia there Lou.
 
2014-03-12 07:58:38 AM  
Another case of "take no responsibility and always someone else for failures"

Man up Nancy boy, Mr T don't pity Nancy boys.
 
2014-03-12 08:20:16 AM  
Taylor even requesting a jury trial, but the suit was dismissed two months later because Taylor failed to pay the required $400 filing and administrative fee.

1) So, why should any of us care about it now?
2) Good lawd.  Do some proofreading, people.
 
2014-03-12 08:40:02 AM  
He has a child named T Jr.
T Junior.
 
2014-03-12 08:42:38 AM  

serial_crusher: Taylor even requesting a jury trial, but the suit was dismissed two months later because Taylor failed to pay the required $400 filing and administrative fee.


blogs.coventrytelegraph.net

I PITY DA FOOL THAT AIN'T GOT $400!
 
2014-03-12 10:37:25 AM  

GalFriday: He has a child named T Jr.
T Junior.


It's "T-Bone!" Call me "T-Bone!"
 
2014-03-12 11:01:38 AM  

farkingismybusiness: brap: If Mr. and Mrs. T were my parents I'd pity the fool that wasn't having delicious but not really write home to mom enough amazing pre-made Bloody Marys.


I pity the farkers who didn't get that.


That pic just made my day.
 
2014-03-12 11:08:33 AM  
And then T teamed up with the Foo Fighters to fight foos.
 
2014-03-12 12:08:14 PM  

Sgt Otter: I don't know if this is what you were referencing, but an old SNL TV Funhouse skit with Mr. T was a bit that always cracked me up.


Holy crap, they're almost all there! And it even works up here in Canuckistan.

Bookmarked, thank you friend very much.

TV Funhouse used to be one of the biggest reasons I tuned into SNL. Always a hit.
 
2014-03-12 12:47:40 PM  
I like 'Super Daves' stunt When he brought Mr T on to insult him.

" I have trouble picking you out of a room full of gay guys"
 
2014-03-12 12:51:22 PM  

robohobo: cretinbob: robohobo: [web.archive.org image 261x207][web.archive.org image 258x183][i.somethingawful.com image 250x280]

1996 called.......

And 1996 was awesome. At least 3 times as awesome as 2016 is going to be.


So true. Too bad 2014 is going to be about even with 1994.
 
2014-03-12 12:52:25 PM  

LZeitgeist: serial_crusher: Taylor even requesting a jury trial, but the suit was dismissed two months later because Taylor failed to pay the required $400 filing and administrative fee.

[blogs.coventrytelegraph.net image 280x372]

I PITY DA FOOL THAT AIN'T GOT $400!


Such terrible grammar, sucka. One pities the fool  who ain't got $400
 
2014-03-12 01:31:18 PM  

robohobo: cretinbob: robohobo: [web.archive.org image 261x207][web.archive.org image 258x183][i.somethingawful.com image 250x280]

1996 called.......

And 1996 was awesome. At least 3 times as awesome as 2016 is going to be.


Yeah, Mr. T AMB was the first thing I thought of too
 
2014-03-12 03:46:33 PM  

Crotchrocket Slim: LZeitgeist: serial_crusher: Taylor even requesting a jury trial, but the suit was dismissed two months later because Taylor failed to pay the required $400 filing and administrative fee.

[blogs.coventrytelegraph.net image 280x372]

I PITY DA FOOL THAT AIN'T GOT $400!

Such terrible grammar, sucka. One pities the fool  who ain't got $400


Actually, I believe he'd say, "I pity da fool ain't got $400', but I clicked 'Add Comment' before I could edit it.
 
2014-03-12 09:47:31 PM  
Nancy?

img1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
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