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(Click2Houston)   Megachurch gets robbed of $600k by thief who doesn't understand "professional courtesy"   (click2houston.com ) divider line
    More: Misc, Houston's Lakewood Church, Lakewood  
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4210 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Mar 2014 at 8:31 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-11 08:01:54 PM  
If only there were some safe place to keep your money instead of leaving it on the premises.
 
2014-03-11 08:14:00 PM  
Be funny if it was someone on the Pope's payroll, finding a way to stick it to megachurches.

That sounded funnier in my head.
 
2014-03-11 08:21:23 PM  
Well, the robbery wouldn't have occurred if God wanted them to keep that money.
 
2014-03-11 08:33:49 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: Well, the robbery wouldn't have occurred if God wanted them to keep that money.


One would almost think God had an issue with those who hoard money...
 
2014-03-11 08:34:04 PM  
.

JasonOfOrillia: Well, the robbery wouldn't have occurred if God wanted them to keep that money.


Building on this, so if bad things happen to other people, its gods will, but if bad things happen to the church its because the people are bad? Organized religion makes no sense.
 
2014-03-11 08:38:04 PM  
FTA: "That's a very bad person," one woman said. "Whatever religion you are, you're still a bad person when you're taking away from someone who does believe."

fark the people who don't believe, I guess.
 
2014-03-11 08:38:21 PM  
I like subby's headline. Good for you, subby.
 
2014-03-11 08:38:26 PM  
Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.
 
2014-03-11 08:39:37 PM  

BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.


Exactly the same validity.

/0
 
2014-03-11 08:42:00 PM  
This is a job for The Bishop.
 
2014-03-11 08:43:13 PM  
+100 subby, HOTY material. Or at least Headline of the Week!
 
2014-03-11 08:44:13 PM  
A trolltastic headline about religion on the main page?

static.comicvine.com
 
2014-03-11 08:44:28 PM  

sgnilward: BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.

Exactly the same validity.

/0$


ftfy
 
gja
2014-03-11 08:45:40 PM  

whither_apophis: This is a job for The Bishop.


religiousfreaks.com
 
2014-03-11 08:49:26 PM  
It was the second time that day the same money was stolen.
 
2014-03-11 08:51:56 PM  
what kind of moron gives money to these multi-millionaires?  and for what purpose?  I mean... what do the Osteens do with the money 'to please the lord'... $600k on a non-holiday weekend... WTF????
 
2014-03-11 08:53:48 PM  
Pharisees! Yay!
 
2014-03-11 08:56:53 PM  
Wait, what? 600k times 52 weeks is $31 million a year from just passing the plate? I got the wrong job.
 
2014-03-11 08:58:06 PM  

Troy McClure: It was the second time that day the same money was stolen.


Two thumbs up.
 
2014-03-11 08:59:31 PM  
maybe it was just God making a withdrawal... I mean they're collecting the money for God, right... maybe he came and got some.  Prove he didn't.


what god wants, god gets.
 
2014-03-11 09:01:04 PM  
Now wait. Prosperity Christians preach that if you love God enough you are rewarded with wealth.

Then, by the transitive property of equality, if you are deprived of wealth, you didn't love God enough.

Therefore, the Olsteens did not love God enough, and never deserved the wealth, by their own preaching.

QED?
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-03-11 09:03:18 PM  

BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.


Single them out because they are money grubbing con-men.
 
2014-03-11 09:04:16 PM  

GDubDub: Now wait. Prosperity Christians preach that if you love God enough you are rewarded with wealth.

Then, by the transitive property of equality, if you are deprived of wealth, you didn't love God enough.

Therefore, the Olsteens did not love God enough, and never deserved the wealth, by their own preaching.

QED?


Works for me.
 
2014-03-11 09:05:06 PM  
Hate to say it, but if this wipes that perpetual grin off Osteen's face...:

cdn01.cdn.pinkisthenewblog.com

good.
 
2014-03-11 09:06:19 PM  
Oh no! Who will pay for Osteen's teeth whitening now?
 
2014-03-11 09:06:54 PM  
So they are all in need of persecution and they are willing to pay for it.
 
2014-03-11 09:11:12 PM  
The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away

/God needed some walking around money.
 
2014-03-11 09:16:24 PM  
setting aside the asshat who runs the megachurch.   Who is the hell leaves $600k In a church over night, eve in a safe


Seems very stupid to me.
 
2014-03-11 09:17:02 PM  

vpb: BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.

Single them out because they are money grubbing con-men.


So... still pretty much the same as most of the smaller churches?
 
2014-03-11 09:19:49 PM  

grimlock1972: Who is the hell leaves $600k In a church over night


The guy who's planning on taking it. . .
 
2014-03-11 09:21:59 PM  
"That's a very bad person," one woman said. "Whatever religion you are, you're still a bad person when you're taking away from someone who does believe."

Like tithing, you mean.
 
2014-03-11 09:26:48 PM  
Megachurch vs. Sharktopus

starring Joel Olsteen's teeth
 
2014-03-11 09:28:26 PM  

grimlock1972: Who is the hell leaves $600k In a church over night, eve in a safe


Bank's closed. Day of rest.
 
2014-03-11 09:28:44 PM  
There's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.


// I really miss Zappa's political commentary. He died way too young.
 
2014-03-11 09:31:22 PM  

BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.


Exactly.
 
2014-03-11 09:32:05 PM  
People/things that I smile about when I hear that they got robbed:


1. Megachurches
2. Teabaggers
3. Pedophiles

(in that order)
 
2014-03-11 09:34:10 PM  

BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.


Or the executive helicopters

Or the huge Summer mansions

Or the fleets of SUVs and sports cars

Or the special secret "slush fund" of hush money

Yeah. Small churches are just like Megachurches.
 
2014-03-11 09:37:14 PM  
"And that may have made it a tempting target for whoever cracked their safe and got away with all the money inside of it."

And got away with all the money inside of it.

Now that is Pulitzer stuff right there. Are they even asking interns for writing samples anymore?
 
2014-03-11 09:43:38 PM  

BigLuca: Shame on you subby, a megachurch has the same validity and reason for existing as all the smaller churches. Don't single it out just based on size.


Sure, if you've got a knee jerk prejudice against all churches and don't really put much thought into it at all.
 
2014-03-11 09:53:01 PM  

TV's Vinnie: People/things that I smile about when I hear that they got robbed:


1. Megachurches
2. Teabaggers
3. Pedophiles

(in that order)


Looks like 3 of the same thing to me
 
2014-03-11 09:58:20 PM  

Triumph: grimlock1972: Who is the hell leaves $600k In a church over night, eve in a safe

Bank's closed. Day of rest.


I still wpuld not leave it in an empty church.
 
2014-03-11 09:59:26 PM  

gja: whither_apophis: This is a job for The Bishop.

[religiousfreaks.com image 320x238]


We was too late!  Reverend Grundy bit the ceiling!
 
gja
2014-03-11 10:05:57 PM  

Triumph: grimlock1972: Who is the hell leaves $600k In a church over night, eve in a safe

Bank's closed. Day of rest.


Should have hid it in he priest's hole (aka, choir boys butt).
 
2014-03-11 10:34:08 PM  

JasonOfOrillia: Well, the robbery wouldn't have occurred if God wanted them to keep that money.


Done in three.
 
2014-03-11 10:36:58 PM  
Calling it now:  This was an inside job.  It will end with the return of (what's left of) the money, followed by a tearful plea for forgiveness from the pastor who had to pay off the guys that were blackmailing him on account of his drug/kiddie diddling habit.
 
2014-03-11 10:51:43 PM  
umm the safe should be guarded by his holiness to protect those that choose to
worship him. after all they are the righteous ones that we all envey
 
2014-03-11 11:00:43 PM  

PhilosopherFLX: Wait, what? 600k times 52 weeks is $31 million a year from just passing the plate? I got the wrong job.


Tax-free to boot! It really does make you wonder if the wolves look good in sheepskin.
 
2014-03-11 11:12:08 PM  

miss diminutive: Oh no! Who will pay for Osteen's teeth whitening now?


Oh never you worry about that, I'm sure Olsteen will prey on the emotions of his followers and next week's take will be doubled
 
2014-03-11 11:17:16 PM  
You mean The Human Tooth lost some money? Please excuse me while I go confront a sleepless night with a heavy heart for this poor, poor man.

/I really can't wait for a scandal on him
 
2014-03-11 11:40:33 PM  
I have this suspicion that the money was long gone before the robbery was reported...
 
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