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(The Atlantic)   Negative body image: it's not just for girls anymore   (theatlantic.com) divider line 34
    More: Sad, body images, JAMA Pediatrics, Children's Hospital of Philadelphia, Children's Hospital Boston, runway models, protein powders  
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8080 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Mar 2014 at 1:32 AM (41 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-11 02:49:35 AM  
11 votes:

FraggleStickCar: taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.

I almost agree, but I'm detecting a misplaced complex of victimhood.  Maybe that's unfair, though.  Maybe I've just been become jaded by subjecting myself to too much MRA insanity(inanity?) on the internet.

I will throw out an idea, though.  On one hand, there is arguably a problem where men are generally discouraged from being emotional/emotive beings- where they are told to "man up" rather than being shown measures of sympathy for their plight.

On the other hand, issues like "harrassment" or "dropping out of school", etc. are much less of an issue for men because the "double standards" that we all like jerk ourselves off over.  It's a lot easier to swallow being sexually harassed, for example, when your chief value within society lies in things other than heterosexual male sexual pleasure.

i.e. when a man faces a certain issues, the social and cultural co ...


But that attitude is just adding to the problem. There is too much of an "you men had you chance, now we want to be the ones who can act sexist with no repercussions" air to it all. Societal sins are NOT hereditary. I did not own slaves. I did not choose not to hire woman at my non-existent company. I did not campaign against women's rights 100 years ago. So I refuse to be punished and told to stand aside because some other dudes did that stuff before I was even born. Once the people who commit a certain evil act are dead, you don't get to just go after others who look similar to then to vent your rage. The dirty little secret about so many so called champions of equality is that what they really want is revenge. They don't want even privilege, they want the privilege for themselves and a chance to hold others down. That's the only way the double standard attitudes that you just voiced can make sense. If you oppose inequality, oppose inequality. Not just for your side. And certainly not at the expense of others, even if they happen to have the same physical makeup of those who held your ancestors down.

Just once I would love to meet someone who championed gender equality, race equality, etc to actually walk the walk and really go for real equality, not just turning the tables. But that would mean admitting that their own side has plenty of faults that need to be fixed, and that punishing those who look like their past enemies is not just. It would mean giving up on the "have your cake and eat it too" dream. Yes you can have all the good stuff you were denied in the past. No you can't deny that same good stuff to others now because you're angry.  No you don't get to have all the benefits of your new enhanced position while refusing to accept the bad parts or responsibilities that others have had to deal with.   And no you can't pretend that others' problems don't exist just because yours were worse in the past. Case and point, if your response to "men are raped too" isn't immediately "you're right. That's equally terrible and deserves just as much prosecution" you're not getting the point of equality.


If your argument is along the lines of "well your side had it so good for so long, just suck it up while we land a few punches of our own now" you're not really in favor of equality, you just want revenge.
2014-03-11 01:48:48 AM  
10 votes:
It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.
2014-03-11 02:08:00 AM  
5 votes:

bunner: Dear guys

Try not to look like sh*t


Bathe often.  Don't live in the recliner.  Walk off those pizzas.


Ta da.


The discrepancy is that it's still socially acceptable to say that to males. It's not acceptable to say that to females. Those who are looking for an equal and gender blind society need to ask why this is so, and how it can be changed.
2014-03-11 01:49:51 AM  
5 votes:
img.fark.net
2014-03-11 01:33:51 AM  
5 votes:
It's never been just girls. It's always been a much larger percentage of girls.
2014-03-11 05:57:44 AM  
3 votes:

FraggleStickCar: On one hand, there is arguably a problem where men are generally discouraged from being emotional/emotive beings- where they are told to "man up" rather than being shown measures of sympathy for their plight.

On the other hand, issues like "harrassment" or "dropping out of school", etc. are much less of an issue for men because the "double standards" ...


So in response to someone saying the problem is that females are protected and males are told to man up, your solution is to say that males should just man up and women need protecting?

You know this isn`t about the wimmins this time...

This is a guy problem but lets make it all about the women and say that if a women has a problem that means a guy could never be accepted as having it! (or if they do it`s dismissible anyway) Like every single other problem!

Think about men saying these lines and how you think you would react.

"I`m getting beaten up by my partner"
"I`m getting bullied at work/school"
"I`m getting a lot of verbal abuse from my partner"
"I`m trying to lose the last 2% of body fat"
"I`m ugly"

Now examine how you would react if it were a woman saying it.

The difference in how you feel is your bias. The bias is the problem in this case.
2014-03-11 02:08:06 AM  
3 votes:

fredbox: taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.

You sound fat privileged oh, fark it, you're right.


Short version: Men with troubles are supposed to man up. Women with troubles have to be rescued, because despite a lot of well-meaning attempts, the phrase "woman up" has never caught on, mostly because no one has ever adequately defined just what gender stereotype it's meant to invoke.
2014-03-11 09:24:59 AM  
2 votes:
Remember: girls having a negative body image is the fault of the "patriarchy" and judgemental males, but boys with a negative body image could not have possibly been caused by judgemental women, because 3rd-wave feminism dictates that women are incapable of wrongdoing or malice.
2014-03-11 04:06:37 AM  
2 votes:
i.imgur.com

Are women fat-shaming, again?

REAL MEN HAVE CURVES.
2014-03-11 02:48:31 AM  
2 votes:
This is news?  I was exceptionally skinny my whole life and people would comment on it all the time.  I would have loved to have those six pack abs women seem to drool over, but working out daily never got me there.
2014-03-11 02:13:38 AM  
2 votes:
Great. They didnt raise girls up they dragged boys down
2014-03-11 01:44:46 AM  
2 votes:
I never understood why men are expected to have hairless bodies.  To me body hair = masculine = sexy.  Why would you want to look like a polished Ken doll?
2014-03-11 12:38:37 AM  
2 votes:
This has been true since the first Calvin Klein underwear ad in the 80s.
2014-03-11 12:32:25 PM  
1 votes:

verbaltoxin: Utter Genius: Remember: girls having a negative body image is the fault of the "patriarchy" and judgemental males, but boys with a negative body image could not have possibly been caused by judgemental women, because 3rd-wave feminism dictates that women are incapable of wrongdoing or malice.

You're either trolling or over-reacting. Calm down and have some dip.

3rd wave feminism is just a thing like religion is just a thing. It's a set of ideas, mores and beliefs, not a person.

My biggest beef with some 3rd wavers is their hypercriticism and oppression Olympics. They portray (cisgendered, straight) women as being incapable of making up their own mind about sex and gender - which seems a lot like a misogynist's POV to me. Also some 3rd wavers are really, really transphobic and sometimes even biphobic. In fact ask a bisexual about the reactions they get from heterosexuals vs. homosexuals sometime, especially the latter who wave the LGBTQIA flag proudly - except they're not so enthusiastic about that BTQIA part.

/Atheism+ fizzled out because of all that word/label/tone policing and privilege checking.


I have to say that as a white, English speaking, straight cisgendered male of moderate financial stability - one of the most privileged beings on the planet - this sort of thing really baffles me. Cis women don't somehow come out ahead by invalidating trans women. Gays don't actually benefit by making life harder for bisexuals. Blacks don't benefit by being homophobic. The only rational and decent reaction to oppression is compassion and respect for ALL people.

I suppose someone with my privilege has the luxury of never having to fight for a seat at the table, but if your reaction to being screwed over is to try and screw someone else over... screw you.
2014-03-11 12:13:37 PM  
1 votes:

meat0918: baconbeard: No Such Agency: Meanwhile in the Fark ad banner:

[cdn2sitescout.edgesuite.net image 300x250]

Yeah, how about we enourage everyone to be healthy, and not body-shame anyone?

How bout we teach people not to give a fark about what anyone else thinks or says about them? Since when did "self" esteem become something that someone else could bestow on you or take away from you?

When we decided it was society's responsibility to make you happy.


"Stop fat shaming" actually means "Stop exercising the power that I've willingly given you to make me feel bad about myself"
2014-03-11 08:52:23 AM  
1 votes:
It's never just been about girls. They just talk about it more, like they talk about everything more.
2014-03-11 08:13:59 AM  
1 votes:

hasty ambush: 1. Good If concerns about body image mean kids stop being fat ass beach balls with lips what is the downside? Since it has been determined we all have to pick up the health care costs of the fat and otherwise irresponsible (except for smokers, unlike the fat they get hit with a health plan surcharge) being a fat slob is not acceptable.

2. Bad Men should be tough enough not to have these body image issues besides being man enough to not get fat first in the first place.


It's like you condensed all the mixed messages of a cosmo magazine into a single sentence.  I guess that's male efficiency for you.
2014-03-11 08:10:53 AM  
1 votes:
Of course males have a growing body image issue.  They are no longer used a meal tickets and have to do something other than earn a respectable living to attract a mate.
2014-03-11 07:47:44 AM  
1 votes:
Negative body image: it's not just for girls anymore

Was it ever?

content.artofmanliness.com

/couldn't find the "hey blubberpuss" one
2014-03-11 07:24:04 AM  
1 votes:

FraggleStickCar: On the other hand, issues like "harrassment" or "dropping out of school", etc. are much less of an issue for men because the "double standards" that we all like jerk ourselves off over. It's a lot easier to swallow being sexually harassed, for example, when your chief value within society lies in things other than heterosexual male sexual pleasure.

i.e. when a man faces a certain issues, the social and cultural connotations and thus ramifications are different when a woman face the same issue, thus the social and cultural response (from various sectors) is expectedly different.


Yeah. The growing achievement gap between boys and girls is no big deal because society doesn't expect men to get jobs.
2014-03-11 07:17:49 AM  
1 votes:
FraggleStickCar: We have a long way to go before anyone with a brain is going to take the "cry for me I'm a white heterosexual man" complaint seriously.

First, leave your racism out of it.  Hiding sexism issues behind politically correct racism is cowardly.

Now, google the sentencing difference between men and women for the same crimes.  It is huge, and every study ever done agrees on that finding.   It is, in fact, MUCH larger than the sentencing difference between whites and blacks.  I assert that inequality under the law is no minor nitpick, and does in fact indicate the opposite of what you just said.  Until men have equal rights under the law, it is difficult to take seriously feminist rants about or hooters uniforms, or why pink is for girls and how horrible that is, or why the toy aisle for girls isdifferent than boys, etc.
2014-03-11 04:01:07 AM  
1 votes:
What evolutionary biology tells us.

Girls: To get a boy to love you, be sexually attractive.

Boys: To get a girl to love you, be sexually attractive, a musician, or rich. In fact skip the first two and just be rich.
2014-03-11 03:44:21 AM  
1 votes:

Abacus9: Speaking as a 130 lb man, 6'1, I've never had any sort of problem with my body image or anything else about myself. It's called grow the hell up. Being a man isn't about how you see yourself, it's about what you do.


It's good that you have a healthy sense of yourself, but these arguments are always about overarching influences within society.  It isn't black and white, they aren't saying that this will absolutely affect everyone the same way, but there ARE effects from these sorts of pervasive messages and images on the large scape.  Certainly they affect some people more than others, but the fact that you can get past it doesn't make it reasonable to expect that everyone will.  If you have a lot of people becoming anorexic, or taking steroids, or what-have-you, writing it off as "people need to have personal responsibility" doesn't help fix the problem.  We need to understand how our collective social conditioning affects people, and the first step in doing that is to acknowledge that it does affect people.
2014-03-11 03:35:49 AM  
1 votes:
At my local gym, I go mainly to play basketball and other organized sports, there are guys there from their teens on up carrying around gallon jugs bags full of powders and vitamins and that work out seven days a week sometimes twice a day according to the staff.

Many of them wearing things that would make the girls that got their workout outfits from playboys gym wear like mild.

If you are not competing for something there is no reason to work out that much except for body image issues
2014-03-11 03:01:18 AM  
1 votes:
Speaking as a 130 lb man, 6'1, I've never had any sort of problem with my body image or anything else about myself. It's called grow the hell up. Being a man isn't about how you see yourself, it's about what you do.
2014-03-11 02:40:14 AM  
1 votes:

FraggleStickCar: taurusowner: It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.

I almost agree, but I'm detecting a misplaced complex of victimhood.  Maybe that's unfair, though.  Maybe I've just been become jaded by subjecting myself to too much MRA insanity(inanity?) on the internet.

I will throw out an idea, though.  On one hand, there is arguably a problem where men are generally discouraged from being emotional/emotive beings- where they are told to "man up" rather than being shown measures of sympathy for their plight.

On the other hand, issues like "harrassment" or "dropping out of school", etc. are much less of an issue for men because the "double standards" that we all like jerk ourselves off over.  It's a lot easier to swallow being sexually harassed, for example, when your chief value within society lies in things other than heterosexual male sexual pleasure.

i.e. when a man faces a certain issues, the social and cultural co .
..  Check your privilege. No one else is allowed to have problems due to their sex until EVERY issue relating to women is solved.


Yeah, no, I don't respect that argument. You have a point, but MRA and Feminist can pursue equality together, there's no need to try to marginalize males for speaking up about something affecting them.
2014-03-11 02:32:47 AM  
1 votes:

EdgeRunner: fredbox: taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.

You sound fat privileged oh, fark it, you're right.

Short version: Men with troubles are supposed to man up. Women with troubles have to be rescued, because despite a lot of well-meaning attempts, the phrase "woman up" has never caught on, mostly because no one has ever adequately defined just what gender stereotype it's meant to invoke.


I think the difference is that women with perfectly fine physiques are constantly being criticized for their body shapes. A young boy in equivalent shape doesn't face anything similar.

/Father of a young boy
//Have colleagues with young daughters
2014-03-11 02:32:02 AM  
1 votes:

taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.


I almost agree, but I'm detecting a misplaced complex of victimhood.  Maybe that's unfair, though.  Maybe I've just been become jaded by subjecting myself to too much MRA insanity(inanity?) on the internet.

I will throw out an idea, though.  On one hand, there is arguably a problem where men are generally discouraged from being emotional/emotive beings- where they are told to "man up" rather than being shown measures of sympathy for their plight.

On the other hand, issues like "harrassment" or "dropping out of school", etc. are much less of an issue for men because the "double standards" that we all like jerk ourselves off over.  It's a lot easier to swallow being sexually harassed, for example, when your chief value within society lies in things other than heterosexual male sexual pleasure.

i.e. when a man faces a certain issues, the social and cultural connotations and thus ramifications are different when a woman face the same issue, thus the social and cultural response (from various sectors) is expectedly different.

This is sort of why its ridiculous when you see a discussion about rape culture.  And dudes feel the need to chime in and say "men get raped too."  There is a weird propensity for "online dudes" to take an issue and make it about them.

We can start worrying about true equality and start putting as much effort into solving problems for men when the stratification separating the genders is anywhere near an equal level.  FFS, the 19th amendment was less than 100 years ago.  We have a long way to go before anyone with a brain is going to take the "cry for me I'm a white heterosexual man" complaint seriously.
2014-03-11 02:30:36 AM  
1 votes:
Girls: Don't become morbidly obese, and maybe slap on some basic makeup; Boom, done. Attractive.

Guys: I believe in taking care of myself, in a balanced diet, and in a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore-cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing "protective" lotion.

That, and don't forget to lift, or you'll look like a scrawny pussy.

taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.


Absolutely correct. If you even claim to be sympathetic to MRA causes around certain feminist circles, you'll be devoured alive. As a social egalitarian, it's hilarious and sad.
2014-03-11 02:10:43 AM  
1 votes:

JRinOKC: [img.fark.net image 450x477]


Well He-Man is actually a body image worth looking up to.
A little too much muscle, but still physically in great shape.
Barbie looks like a wraith, with no muscle at all, and no ass or breasts.
Barbie's failure is that straight men don't find her attractive.
2014-03-11 01:53:57 AM  
1 votes:
Dear guys

Try not to look like sh*t


Bathe often.  Don't live in the recliner.  Walk off those pizzas.


Ta da.
2014-03-11 01:51:25 AM  
1 votes:

taurusowner: It's never been just for girls. We just happen to live in a time where the idea of manliness still being tied to one's ability to present a callous appearance converges with the sexism pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. It's socially acceptable to care more about problems that females face while ignoring problems that males face, because males have historically been on the top of every socio-political ladder. Females doing poor in college? Emergency. Males doing poor and dropping out? Whatever. Female is sexually harassed by a colleague? Emergency. Male is harassed? Whatever. It's acceptable to give females overt preference in everything from job hiring to family court and no one cares. So of course there is a big social push to try to fix any problems females encounter, such as negative body image. The fact that males encounter the same problems is virtually irrelevant. Males are simply told to toughen up and deal with it.

It's not that males don't have to deal with body image problems too. It's that society as a whole has been conditioned to not give a shiat about male problems.


You sound fat privileged oh, fark it, you're right.
2014-03-11 01:46:22 AM  
1 votes:
Bigorexia?
2014-03-11 01:39:44 AM  
1 votes:
I've got negative body image.

It happens to be completely justified.

The womenfolk are hard pressed not to agree.
 
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